A/N: Apologies right now for all of you who get confused by my time shifts. Its a writing technique I saw used once by one of my favorite authors (props to Peter David!) and I've used it in the past to good effect. Hope you can keep up, but if not, I'll be sorry to see you go. Enjoy!
Eerian
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the rights to Buffy: the Vampire Slayer, Angel: the Series, or the people and places therein. I also do not own the character of Lucy Hannover. I've borrowed them to write this fiction, which is just that and not a way to try to steal money from Joss and company.
Now
The first thing he was aware of was the rain.
It was cold, seeping into his clothes and making his duster feel heavy on his arms.
Then he became aware of the mud.
It was also cold, and seeping into his clothes and duster.
He had a rueful thought: All that demon blood and slime, and it's the mud that's gonna finally do it in. He chuckled, briefly amused at the thought. His chuckle turned into a scream as he remembered.
Falling. For a long time.
And then, hitting the ground. And pain.
Then he remembered where he'd fallen from, and how he'd gotten there. Loss stabbed a dagger deep into his heart at the memory. This must be what she felt when they pulled her out of heaven, he thought.
She who? He couldn't quite remember.
He knew she'd been there in the cavern with him at the end--or nearly the end. He'd made her leave. She'd touched him before she left him, and said something he hadn't believed, but the memory eluded him.
Who is she? He knew she was important, knew she'd made his last couple of years on earth bearable, but he couldn't remember who she was.
I know I loved her…
Suddenly he heard her in his head, and remembered what she said: "I love you."
"No you don't," he'd replied calmly. "But thanks for sayin' it."
She'd looked like she was going to cry, and he felt guilt stab its icy fingers in his heart at the memory. Guilt at having hurt the only thing in his unlife he'd truly loved, unconditionally and without reason.
He began to weep. God, I'm so sorry…
Buffy…
