Chapter 37 – Return to Reality

It was 0430 and Lt. Colonel Samantha Carter- O'Neill gave up all pretense of trying to get back to sleep. She was exhausted, but sleep eluded her. They had spent the better part of yesterday searching the base for Sergeant Walter Davis, who had disappeared without a trace. There had been reports of him heading down the corridors of level 22 in the general direction of the quantum mirror. But they had found no sign of him anywhere. Sam shook her head in frustration. She didn't need another thing to occupy her mind and worry her today; she had more than enough on her mind as it was.

This was the day she had been both dreading and anticipating for a week now – the day she would learn if her child would be coming back to her. Disentangling herself from Jack's arms, she pushed the covers aside and got out of bed. She took a quick shower, more for the routine of it than to wake herself up. When she came out of the bathroom, she was a bit startled to find her husband sitting at the end of the bed, head in his hands. He looked up when he noticed the light from the open bathroom door.

"I really hope you get out of this habit of waking up so early. You're really killing my REM cycles," he teased her softly.

Samantha came over and joined him on the bed. "I'm sorry; I tried not to wake you. I just couldn't sleep any longer." She rested her head on his shoulder as his arm came around her in comfort.

"It's OK. I never do sleep well when you're not with me. Some innate sense I guess." He drew back and looked in her eyes. "You too excited about the day?"

Samantha shrugged her shoulders. "Excited and nervous, actually. What if something happened? What if the other Sam doesn't want to give him back to us?"

"Hey," he squeezed her shoulders, "We've been over all of that already. If she's anything like you, she will give JJ back. I have no doubt it will be hard for her, but she knows who he truly belongs to." He paused as he thought for a moment. " You said we weren't together in their reality?" At the nod of her head, he continued, "Well, maybe this will be the catalyst they need, then. JJ can be very persuasive, you know. Takes after me," Jack said proudly.

His comment earned the first real smile he had seen from her in a long time. She straightened away from him and looked hopefully into his eyes. "Can you get ready so we can go? You told me if I wanted to go at 0300, we could," she reminded him.

Jack groaned. "Do you really think that's a good idea, Samantha? JJ never gets up before 0630. I don't think it's fair to him or them to get there this early and disturb their sleep. Besides, I'm certain their General will want to talk to us as well, and I don't want to waste time waiting around for everyone to be awake. According to you, we shouldn't stay there longer than 2 or 3 hours," he reminded her gently.

Samantha sighed in resignation. He was right and she knew it. Hugging her tightly, he said, "I'll tell you what. I'll shower and get dressed, then treat you to some coffee and breakfast in the commissary. I heard from the cooks that pancakes are on the menu for this morning."

Samantha laughed softly, "I may not be able to eat much, but that sounds fine. At least it will pass the time."

Jack stood up and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "Well, it's not the most enthusiastic reception to one of my offers, but I'll take it." He gave her a wink and headed into the bathroom. Samantha stood up and entered JJ's room, picking up toys and pictures as she walked around his room. Her eyes misted over as she looked at the picture Janet had taken of the three of them a few weeks ago. They were so proud of their little boy and looked like such a happy, carefree family. Who would have thought they would be going through something as surreal as sending their child to an alternate reality in order to save his life?

Samantha set down the picture and resolutely straightened her shoulders. She would not get melancholy; she was going to get her child in a few hours. She turned to see Jack standing in the doorway and gave him a smile, noting the relief in his face as he took in her smile. "Ready for breakfast? I think I am a bit hungry after all," she told him.

Taking her hand in his, they left their quarters and headed to the commissary. He knew without a doubt that the day ahead would be emotional. He was just thankful to see his beloved wife shaking off the depression that seemed to have hovered over her these last few days.

Sam woke at 0530, wondering at the unusual feeling of a warm body next to her. She raised her head and looked down, smiling to see the tiny body of JJ snuggled up next to her on the bed. She turned on her side and cuddled him close, careful not to wake him. She pressed a light kiss to his head, trying to remember how they had gotten here. She vaguely remembered falling asleep on the couch leaning against Jack with JJ sound asleep in her lap.

Blushing slightly as dawning realization hit her, she looked around the room. They were alone. She recalled how Jack had taken JJ in his arms, then helped her up and steered her toward her room. He had pulled back the covers, gotten her settled, and moved to put JJ in his crib before she stopped him. She asked him to leave JJ with her. Jack had nodded in understanding and placed the little boy next to her in the bed.

Sam blushed again as she remembered quietly asking him if he wanted to stay as well, just to be near JJ, she told herself. He had given her a soft smile and told her he would like nothing better, but it probably wasn't a good idea. Then he had tucked the covers around both her and JJ and left to sleep in his own room.

Now she wondered how she would face him; what would he think of her? Shaking herself mentally, she decided not to worry about that for now. She had enough on her plate for one day.

Sam laid in bed, committing to memory the smell and feel of the little boy next to her. Her eyes welled with tears as she tried to imagine going back to not having him in her life. Amazing, she thought, how a baby who wasn't hers could impact her life in such a short time.

Hearing movement out in the living room, Sam pulled the covers back and slowly got out of bed. She carefully picked JJ up and placed him in the crib as she didn't want him to roll out of bed when she wasn't there. JJ didn't move a muscle as he was gently laid in the crib. Another thing he had in common with Jack, Sam thought with a smile. He slept like a rock.

Sam brushed her fingers through her hair before entering the living room. Jack looked up at her when she came in, smiling at her rumpled appearance. "Hey," he said softly.

"Morning," she replied just as quietly. They exchanged a long look before Sam pulled her eyes away.

Jack indicated the coffee table in front of him. "There's fresh coffee in the pot. Help yourself."

Sam smiled at the thought of a hot cup of coffee. "Thanks. I think I'll get dressed first. Will you listen for JJ while I'm in the bathroom? I think we have a little while before he gets up."

"Of course," he reassured her. "I'll get a bottle ready as well." Sam nodded, then made her way to the bathroom to get dressed.

She was almost finished when she heard the phone in their suite ring. A feeling of dread stole through her; she knew what that phone call had to mean. She looked at her watch: 0600. She was actually a bit surprised that they hadn't been called earlier. If it had been her child, she would have been here before the crack of dawn. Steeling herself, Sam entered the living room and listened to the end of the conversation.

"Yes, Sir. Can you give us 20 minutes? We need to get JJ up and changed and give him a bottle before we head down." He glanced at Sam in apology as she entered the room. "Yes. General. We will bring all of JJ's things with as well. We'll be there in 20 minutes, Sir." Jack hung up the phone and continued to hold her gaze.

"They're here, aren't they?" she asked quietly. At the nod of his head, she dropped her gaze and took a deep breath. She bit her bottom lip, trying to get herself under control. Jack stepped closer to her and took her hands in his.

"Sam?" he asked gently. "You know this is the only way, don't you?"

She looked up at him, the tears evident in her eyes. She nodded at him and replied, "Yes. But it doesn't make it any easier."

"I know," he agreed as he pulled her into a hug. They stayed that way for a few minutes before Sam began to pull back.

"The cameras aren't still out, are they Jack?"

"No, but to hell with the cameras. If this were happening to a child of Danny's that came through the mirror, I'd hug him too," he assured her.

Sam gave a short laugh. "Yes, but probably not as long." They grinned at each other before she pulled away completely. He could see the transformation from Samantha Carter to Major Carter take place before his eyes. With firm resolve, she straightened her shoulders and said, "I'll get JJ up and changed. Why don't you get his things together. All of his clean laundry is still in the bag in the corner of my room. You'll have to put his extra toys and diapers in with the clothes."

"Hey," he teased, "Aren't I supposed to be the one giving the orders?"

"Not yet. For the time being, you are still daddy and I'm mommy. And you know that the mom is always the one in charge!" she teased him with a grin before going to get JJ up. Jack let her have the last word; he knew this was going to be a difficult day for her and wanted to let her have as many light moments as she could. Before he went to gather JJ's things, he made a quick call to Daniel, asking him to get Teal'c and report to the conference room on level 12 as soon as possible.

JJ remained sleepy while he was changed, dressed, and fed. It was earlier than normal for him and he just wanted to stay snuggled into the comforting warmth of his mother's arms. Sam looked up as Jack entered the living room, bags in hand. JJ had just finished his bottle and appeared to finally be waking up. He smiled when he caught sight of Jack and called out a greeting of "Dada" to him. Jack set down the bags and took JJ from her arms.

"Hey little man, how are you this morning? God, am I going to miss hearing your greeting whenever you see me enter a room," he stated a little roughly around the lump that had suddenly gathered in his throat. Sam caught his eyes with a look of quiet sympathy and understanding flooding through them. "You ready?" Jack asked her quietly after clearing his throat.

"As ready as I'll ever be," she responded in kind. Sam picked up a few of the photos they had taken of JJ when he started walking and placed them in the baby bag at Jack's feet. When he looked at her in question, she shrugged her shoulders and said, "I figured they'd want some pictures, since they weren't here for his first steps."

She bent to take the bag in hand when Jack stopped her. "Here, you take JJ. I'll carry the bags."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure, Sam." Jack handed JJ back to her and bent to pick up the bags. Sam moved to her room, to give once last glance into the empty room where she had spent many quiet moments with this little boy and had come to realize some important things about herself in the process. She turned at Jack's questioning, "Sam?" then turned to follow him out of the room, not noticing the forgotten teddy bear sticking partway out from under the covers of her bed.


A/N: Another chapter that was getting way too long so I split it! The next one should be up later today if I can get it completed. I'm having a hard time letting JJ go!