(Sung to the tune of "Alternate Title" aka "Randy Scouse Git" by the Monkees)

-> -> -> -> -> -> -> -> -> ->

He's a wonderful Colonel and he's ours all ours

And there isn't a better way for us to wile away the hours.

But being in a prison camp is anything but fun,

So we blow a couple of bridges and the Krauts are on the run...

>

The four men who follow Hogan are now underneath the floor,

There are Krauts out near the tunnel, and old Schultz is at the door.

He reminds them of a teddy, with lots of stuffing there,

There are snowflakes on his rifle, and smells of strudel in the air.

>

Why must you be like Klink?

Why don't you stop and think?

Why don't you realize your acts could take you to the brink?

>

Now they've darkened all their faces and the moon is on the rise

They've been waiting for an hour, they can't find a place to hide.

The Kraut known as Burkhalter is speaking, they believe,

It's not easy trying to stay put when they know they have to leave...

>

They'll get those flyers free!

The Krauts will never see!

They'll do the things that they do best 'cuz heroes they all be!

>

(Scat singing in the Rec Hall)

>

They'll get those flyers free!

The Krauts will never see!

They'll do the things that they do best 'cuz heroes they all be!

>

(He's a wonderful Colonel and he's ours all ours

And there isn't a better way for us to wile away the hours.

But being in a prison camp is anything but fun,

So we blow a couple of bridges and the Krauts are on the run!)