Disclaimer: I own nothing!

A/N: Just one review for that last chapter- I guess that's probably telling me something, so I'll try and make this one better. If any one has any ideas for the story then please don't hesitate to tell me, especially concerning the title which I'm still not happy with.

Oh wow this is great guys- I've just found out that Sirius is actually the name of a star- and not just any star, but the Dog star. You probably all already knew that, but I didn't and I think that it's so cool!

Just a warning about the very slight sexual reference at the end of the chapter and I've changed the rating for future chapters.


Chapter 8: The Missing

It was three days after a rather bleak Christmas and Sirius and I were sitting in the common where he was attempting to teach me to play chess. It was a futile task as I was far too impatient to learn and Sirius was not the greatest teacher in the world, but we bumbled along having nothing better to do except play our thousandth game of exploding snap.

'Stop going for my queen Sirius- God you're so sexist!' I exclaimed as one of his soldier things cut my poor queen in two.

'For Merlin's sake Ella, its what you're meant to do. I'm not playing with you if you keep going on at me!' he replied exasperatedly, ruffling his hair in frustration.

'So what's this thingy then?' I asked after a few moments of intense silence, in which Sirius worked out his next move with extreme focus and concentration.

'That thingy Ella is, as I told you ten minutes ago, a pawn. I wish you'd listen when I explained things to you.' H e muttered in annoyance.

'Touché' I mumbled under my breath, mentally picking a number from one to five, and then moving my pawn that number of spaces. In what I can only describe as an amazing stroke of good luck, the little figurine pulled out his miniature sword and slaughtered one of Sirius' knights. Sirius bellowed in frustration and pushed his chair over- I've since come to the conclusion that boys hate losing anything, even if it's just a silly little man made of stone and consequently boys don't take being beaten lightly.

'Wow calm down Sirius, it's only a stupid game, and you're still winning by miles.' I remarked casually.

'Yes but taking away that particular knight messes up my entire game plan- and its not even like you did it with any kind of skill, I bet you did it with some stupid guess!' he exclaimed in obvious annoyance.

'I am hurt that you would think that I am that awful at this game Sirius, I knew exactly what you were planning with that knight and in my highly skilled mind I deduced a skilful plan to take it.' I cried in an extremely offended voice.

'Okay then Ella, what exactly was I planning to do with that Knight?' He asked with a bemused look on his face.

'Um well, you were- you were planning to steal my other players!' I declared over-confidently. Sirius arched an eyebrow at me, giving me a 'yeah right and Snape and I have been secretly married for the past two years' kind of look, that I have to admit did have a certain, lazy sexiness to it. I could almost see what Katy had gone so crazy over- and let me emphasize the word almost in that sentence. The more time I spent with Sirius, the more I realised that there was more to him than I had initially given him credit for. In our short spell of being potions partners I had come to the conclusion that Sirius was indolent, selfish and one-dimensional but that Christmas had corrected my largely inaccurate assumptions.

He was passionate, intelligent and cared deeply for his friends. I'm no psychologist but I couldn't help but analyse Sirius, as he was such a complex character, something that I had failed to recognise during the previous six years of my knowing him. I had simply seen the overly confident boy who joyfully hexed anyone who happened to cross his path, and steadily went through every girl in the year he deemed good enough. I did not see the neglected, scared little boy who yearned for the attention and acceptance that his parents had neglected to provide. I did not see the gaping holes inside of him, which he tried to fill by going through girl after girl, and I did not see the loyal, devoted friend that he was to Peter, James and Remus.

However right at that moment I was not enjoying the company of the chess playing Sirius, it was nothing personal, just that his obsessed determination to completely annihilate all my little chess pieces was starting to irritate me. I didn't even care that I was losing horribly to him, in fact I was trying to lose just so the game could be finished a few moments earlier and Sirius could return to his usual calm, unfazed demure.

'Can we please just say you've won already- this is worse than listening to Snape drone on about gilly weed!' I moaned, watching his bishop turn another of my players to a pile of rubble.

'Come on Ella, we're nearly finished- be a sport.'

'Fine, but we're not playing another game- ever.' I grumbled in reply, slowing inching my king out of his refuge place behind some knights. Sirius didn't seem to notice my obvious intentions, and fell right into my trap. He cried out in triumph as he surrounded my king.

'HA- Check mate, you lose!' He exclaimed. I let myself smile in relief, as I sprawled back in my chair feeling physically drained from our game- and other things. The whereabouts of my parents still weighed heavily on my mind. It had now been almost two weeks since I last heard about them and Dumbledore was keeping his distance- I suppose he was busy, but still I wished that he would talk to me, reassure me that everything would turn out for the best. I was still as confused and in the dark as ever, nothing seemed to make sense any more, not even Sirius. Before the two of us had been forced together, he was nothing to me but now I could feel something growing between us and it was a foreign, uncomfortable feeling that I wished to stifle and vanquish.

'Do you want to hear something hilarious?' Asked Sirius after a few moments of amiable silence in which I had begun shuffling a pack of cards and dealing them out to Sirius and I.

'Always.' I replied, rolling over to look at him.

'James wrote me a couple of days ago saying that he was thinking of proposing to Lily- just think of James getting married!' Cried Sirius, laughing a little but I could tell he was no more amused by the news than I was. I think that he felt threatened by the obvious rival for his best friends attention.

'That's not funny, that's insane- they're only eighteen. Ten galleons says he never goes through with it.' I retorted dismissively.

'Don't be so cynical- I mean James really does love her. I know that he has a funny way of showing it some times, but as much as I hate to admit it they do have something special.' Sirius retorted with obvious effort.

'What does love ever mean anyway, it seems to me that all it is, is a reason to go all doey eyed for a couple of weeks before he rips your heart out then stuffs it down your neck!' I exclaimed passionately, all my convictions about love suddenly bubbling up inside me like badly shaken butter-beer. Sirius' eyes suddenly bulged with surprise- I don't think that he expected such a fiery reaction from me considering that most of the time I am pretty docile, as long as someone isn't trying to stick their tongue down my throat.

'I take it that you've been treated badly in the past.' He remarked timidly, I think that he had been a bit frightened by my outburst.

'Certainly not, I've never let myself succumb to love.' I retorted shortly, however when I said it, it sounded slightly pathetic. I mean generally when people claim to have fallen in love someone they don't tend to say that they have 'succumbed' to it.

'Neither have I, though that's not through choice or anything.' He said simply, his eyes fixed on the cards I had just dealt him.

'What! You've had more girlfriends than Remus has had days off' I scoffed in disbelief.

'Yes but that doesn't automatically mean I've been in love with any of them.' He replied simply. I gazed at him in complete shock.

'So you've never felt anything for any of them? Do you have any idea how shallow that sounds?' I demanded- Katy appearing at the forefront of my mind. She had agonised over him for so long but it had all been in vain, Sirius had never cared about her at all.

'I didn't say that did I? I just said that I didn't love any of them- not the way that James loves Lily anyway. I mean sure they were all nice and I liked them but none of them offered anything new or special. They were all so… repetitive.' He explained, looking up at me intently.

'I guess I'm looking for someone different- unique.' He finished, giving me a strange look. And then realisation hit me like a bludger, he meant me!

'Oh' I squeaked, looking down at my hands as though they were the most fascinating things that I'd ever seen in my life.

'You intrigue me Ella, James told me what a positive enigma you are but it took me a while to realise this for myself.' He stated softly, but those dark ebony eyes were pulling me places I didn't want to go. I stood up quickly and purposefully and turned away from him.

'I'm going to dinner now.' I declared, making my departure as rapidly as possible. I tried to put on a cool, unfazed front but it barely disguised the quivering wreck that lay beneath. My pulse was racing and my breath escaped in short raked bursts. Something about knowing that Sirius liked me was burrowing deep inside my skin and causing havoc there. He was breaking down all my defences and I didn't like it one little bit.

I was walking in the general direction of the Great Hall wondering whether it would be Shepard's pie again for dinner, and if so, would they put in those awful green bean things in it, when Professor McGonagall suddenly appeared at my side and quietly asked me to accompany her to the Headmasters office. I felt my stomach drop, as though I had just swallowed a brick as I tried to keep up with McGonagalls speeding form. What was this about? Did they have news on my parents? Was it good or bad? There was so many questions whirling around my mind that I barely even registered being ushered into the office and pushed into a chair opposite Dumbledore. I tried not to register the sombre, mournful look on his face that told me everything before he uttered a single word; instead I simply gazed at a picture behind him.

'Ella, my dear child it pains me more than I can say to have to speak theses words but I'm afraid that as of this morning we have lost contact with your parents' He sighed, gazing at me sadly.

'Lost contact, I-I'm sorry sir but I'm not entirely sure what you mean.' I stuttered, feeling suddenly light headed and nauseous. I had expected him to tell me that they were dead, but lost contact was something different altogether, it offered the faintest glimmer of hope.

'Well they were supposed to meet with Alice Longbottom this morning, however they never made an appearance at the rendezvous point. We have been searching for them all day but have yet to find them. I urge you in this uncertain time, to stay inside the grounds at all times and do not venture anywhere alone. I do not know what all this means yet and whether you are in any immediate danger so please cooperate with us and do not get yourself into any unnecessary peril. I promise that you will be the first to know as soon as I hear any news concerning the fate of your parents.' Explained Dumbledore with slow sombreness.

'So they're missing then, I'm assuming that isn't a good thing.' I replied, licking my lips uncertainly.

'Its not the best news I've ever had to share, but it isn't as dire as it could be. Who knows Ella, perhaps they simply got lost.' Offered Dumbledore with a small sigh.

'Yes but you don't really believe that do you. Please just tell me one thing, what are the chances of my ever seeing them again?' I asked desperately.

'I don't want to cause you any unnecessary anguish Ella, but I can't deny the poor chance of your parents survival' Said Dumbledore softly, reaching across his desk and taking my hands in his, but I barely registered the contact. My skin suddenly felt numb as a sudden roaring filled my ears. The next thing that I would hear from Dumbledore would be the news of my parent's death; I knew this as well as Dumbledore did.

I left the office in a trance, feeling the bitter throb of grief attack my heart as I made my way back to the Common room. The pain was worse than anything I'd ever

Suffered before, it was so intense that I felt as though I could never be happy again; it was almost as though a dementor was closing in on me. I'm not entirely sure how I made it back to the portrait, or how I managed to crawl through, as my recollection of those terrible moments is somewhat hazy, but I do recall seeing Sirius standing there before me as though it were yesterday. Concern filled those hypnotising dark eyes as he watched me stumble through the porthole and shakily regain my balance. We looked at each other for a few moments, I have no idea what was going through his mind but all I could think about was how the sensation of his lips on mine had momentarily made me forget everything- could his embrace make me forget again?

'Ella...' He began, but the words were disregarded as I pressed my lips to his, pushing him forcefully against the hard stonewall. He responded immediately with equal fever before pushing me away much like I had done to him a few days before.

'Stop it Ella, I don't want to take advantage of you.' He gasped, putting a hand to his bruised lips.

'Sirius please, I just need to feel something other than pain- its either this or putting my hand in the fire.' I pleaded, pulling at the side of his cloak. Sirius stood still for a moment, obviously considering his current predicament, but I took this opportunity to pull his cloak away and entwine my arms around his neck, forcing my lips on his once more. This time he didn't try to break away.


I've decided that this story is going to be a trilogy, so there is only going to be another two or three chapters in this first instalment. I hope you liked this chapter as it took me quite a while to finish, but this may be because I was also working on an English assignment at the same time.