Samiechanshinichiluver: Hey guys! Once again THANK YOU! For all of your reviews! It REALLY REALLY helped me, and inspired me to keep updating! I don't feel like I'm alone anymore, cuz ill always have u guys to count on! : well here's chpt 4! ENJOY and keep reviewing! (This one took 4 ever!)

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Even though Conan had hugged Ran so forcefully in the beginning, he didn't expect it to turn out like this. He only really hugged her like that to shelter himself in her arms so an enraged Heiji wouldn't tear his head off. And once Heiji realized that Conan was awake during the little make-out show and that he had given him free front row seats to, Conan knew that ripping his head off was definitely the first thing that came to Heiji's mind from the look on his face.

It was fun and all, and the thought of Heiji thirsting for revenge because of him was wonderful, perhaps the first happy thought that had come to his head in a LONG time.

He also knew what he had done was trespassing Heiji's and Kazuha's privacy too, which was just another sin added to the black pool in his soul.

God was defiantly already punishing him for that sin. It had been almost ten minutes now, and Ran still hadn't let go, but held even harder! Conan was practically choking, half because he was being squeezed so hard, and half because every time he was about to ask Ran to let him go, she would pull him closer and start mumbling soothing, sad Japanese words into his ear. "Conan-kun… It's ok… I'm here… ill never let you go…"

It hurt a little at how hard she was squeezing him, but the pain would never measure up to how much that one hug was piercing his heart. He couldn't believe how much she cared about him already, even if he was just a kid. She didn't even know who he really was, and she was already destroyed with his near death experience.

For that reason, he hated himself more. This was ten times worse than listening to her cry over him every other night. It was 20 times worse than listening to her talk about him, and about how much she loved and missed him.

The joy he felt a few minutes ago had been completely drained out of him with a few good seconds of thinking. He now hated himself, and once again opened his eyes up to the danger everyone was now in because of him.

>>>>>

Heiji held himself back as hard as he could. Damn you Kudo! Revenge had defiantly filled his eyes and the only reason why Conan wasn't being choked by him right now was because he had to be a little baka and take shelter in his "darling Ran's" arms. Damn you again!

He sat back down and counted to ten. He saw Kazuha blushing out of the corner of his eye. He knew that she knew that Conan was watching. From the way he acted, no one had to be a detective to see that Conan had been very amused and seen something worth watching. "Worth watching" as in sticking you fucking nose into one of your closest friend's most PRIVATE moments! He glared at Conan, one of the most Revenge-will-come-soon, hateful glares he had ever given someone. All Conan did was just smile back and wink.

Kudo… that was too far… you are SO gonna pay for that one. He glared for a few more seconds and was about to get up and tell Ran something awful about Kudo. But before he could, Conan's attitude completely changed.

He went from a proud, evil smile, to a sad, depressed, blank face. Ran still hadn't let him go, and he defiantly looked like he was getting impatient. But not eager impatient, it was a leave-me-alone impatient. He was scared. He looked at Ran and sighed, then looked at the floor. He looked totally destroyed. What is he thinking of?

Heiji sat there dumb founded, and Kazuha just watched Ran and Conan, she wasn't really watching them though, she was spacing out. She was in her own little world, one full of memories of just a few minutes ago.

Heiji glanced at Kazuha. To think, just a few minutes ago she was all mine, and I was in a universe of never-ending happiness… but now… he looked deep into Conan's depressed eyes. I'm back in the same place I was in when I first got here. Hell.

>>>>>

Finally, Ran freed Conan from her grasp. And looked straight into his eyes.

"C-Conan, Don't you ever… EVER do something like that again… d-don't ever try and leave me that way, I-I don't care what you were thinking… just don't make me g-g-go through that again… p-please…"

Her eyes were puffy and red. They burned with tears of sorrow, happiness, and relief.

"I thought I was going to lose you… I j-just-" Conan cut her off.

"It's ok Ran-neechan, (cough) I'm here and still alive. I'll be just fine, as long as you stop crying, it hurts me to see you like this Ran-neechan… we can call the nurse to come and bring some warm tea if you want, I mean… if it helps you feel better…"

"Oh Conan! I don't need tea; you've made me feel 100 happier, just by saying that! I missed you so much!" her eyes glistened with a jolt of happiness and she pulled him into another hug.

"Thanks Ran-neechan, I needed that. But I also need to talk to all of you. It's extremely important!" He glanced around at everyone. Kazuha was out of her trance, and Heiji was watching eagerly.

"First, I need to ask you a few questions Ku- ahem- Conan." Heiji sat up and sat next to Conan. "It's only my job to find out why and when a crime is committed, and this attempt to murder you is indeed a crime. So first, I'll need to ask you who. Was it a suicidal attempt, or was it an actual attempt by someone else to murder you?" He stared hopefully at Conan, while Conan's eyes just drifted to the floor.

"Heiji?!? What do you think you are asking him? Of course it was someone else! He's only eight, why would he try and kill himself? Right Conan?" Ran patted Conan's back and looked into his eyes, his just drifted further away. "Conan?"

This is the time. I need to tell her now. No more lies, she needs to know. They all need to know. I can't hold back from her any longer… I have to tell her the truth… Even if she hates me forever after I do. But even if I do tell her or not, she'll be in danger either way, and she'll probably be better off fighting the Black Organization knowing that I'm here, than fighting alone with an eight year old kid. Yes, I have to tell her… it's only what's right…

"Ran…" Conan asked.

"Yes Conan? Is there something you need to tell me?" Her eyes got wider. So did Heiji's. Kudo…

"Yes Ran… actually there is… it's very important…" he stared down at his feet.

"Conan… what is it? Remember you can always trust me with anything… Conan?" She was getting worried.

He grabbed her hand, and looked straight into her eyes. She was a little startled by his sudden gesture, but didn't say a word. She waited for him to speak again.

"First of all… my name isn't Conan… and I'm not eight… I'm actually no where close to that…" His eyes never left her once the whole time.

Her eyes narrowed, she was confused. His parents told me he was eight though… Kazuha was also confused. Heiji just sat there and watched with guilty eyes. He felt bad for Kudo, and was afraid to see Ran's reaction, but he knew himself that he was probably no where close to how afraid Kudo was at that moment. He was defiantly right.

Ran finally spoke, "W-Well… how old are you? A-And what is your real name?"

There was a long silence. Finally after about 20 seconds Conan's clear voice filled the room up again.

"My name is Shinichi Kudo. I'm seventeen years old. I am an eleventh grade student in high school, and my best friend's name is Ran Mouri. She is the best Karate champ I've ever truly known, and she kicks hard... VERY hard." Conan looked up at Ran. His face was blank, though his eyes were sad and alone. "And I'm really sorry… for everything…"

Kazuha put her hand on her mouth; she looked more surprised than Ran. She WAS more surprised than Ran.

But even if Ran had been considering this, and even if she had been suspecting this for so long, and rehearsing in her mind and in front of her mirror what she would say and do if this was true, none of it stopped her heart from slicing in half, and then mending itself together from the heat and anger that filled her body. Her skin and blood were boiling. She was filled with the most anger and sadness that she had ever been exposed to in her life.

>>>>>

Ran's eyes narrowed, as they began to fill with tears. She got up and started walking backward; she was shaking her head with denial. Her eyes were filled with disgust and hate. She backed slowly to the door, her eyes never left Conan. Her teeth were grinding, she hated him now more than she'd ever hated in her life put together. She swore to herself at that moment that she'd never talk to him again. She'd never look at him again. She'd never love him again.

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"Ran please don't go! I have a reason for everything I've ever done. I was trying to protect you! Ran please just listen!" Conan was overwhelmed by the look she was giving him. Ran didn't stop; she gave him one last look, and turned around and ran out the door.

"RAN! DON'T GO! YOU'LL BE KILLED! RAN STOP!" Conan screamed as loud as her could, he knew she wouldn't listen. Ran I'm so sorry…

But there was no way he'd let the women he loved so much get hurt, he'd do anything to make her stop, to get her somewhere safe and fix this whole mess that he got all of them into. Even if he had to live the rest of his life without her ever looking at him or talking to him again, he had to stop her.

Without thinking, he stumbled out of his bed, once again ripping his IVs off. He began to run to the door, but Heiji jumped off of the bed and grabbed him by his gown. Shinichi wasn't going to let Heiji stop him though, so he bit his arm and Heiji dropped him. Conan ran for the door and saw his shoes on the way. He slipped them on as fast as he could, and then turned them up to the max. Sorry Heiji… he turned around and very lightly kicked the doorstop at Heiji, who was jumping for him at that exact moment. It whacked Heiji on the forehead and Heiji let out one last yelp of pain, and then fell to the floor.

Kazuha stood up and ran over to Heiji, "Oh my god! Are you ok?" It was no use though. Heiji was completely knocked out.

Conan turned around once again and headed for the door, on the way he flipped the nurse's stand and took a silver key. He turned around one last time gasping for breath and looked at Kazuha "Take care of Heiji for a while, will ya?" He then turned around and walked out the door, then locked it. He Ran down the hall, he was tripping over his gown.

"RAN WAIT!!! I CAN EXPLAIN! PLEASE STOP!!!" He was taking huge gulps of air. His throat hurt like hell, and the places where his IVs were, were bleeding really bad. His legs were so weak, and he could barely run, but he wouldn't give up. Not with knowing what kind of danger Ran could be in.

He tried turning the corner, but slipped and slid into the wall. He got up again, and then stumbled over one of the carts that were in the hallways. His legs felt like they were broken, he knew he probably sprained an ankle, but that didn't stop him. He got up again and began to run.

While he was running, his left shoe fell off, but he abandoned it, knowing that it would take too much time to put back on.

Another corner, another fall, another sprained something to worry about. That was just about the routine after five minutes of running and screaming. His throat was burning worse now, and when he looked at his shoeless left foot, it was scratched, bruised and bleeding.

Once and a while he would pass a nurse or two, and they would began to chase and shout at him once realizing that he was a patient. But once Shinichi saw an item on the floor, he wouldn't hesitate to stop, turn around and knock them out in the same way he had done earlier to Heiji.

Also, every time he would knock another nurse out, he would be reminded of the lack of staff they had there. And it would remind him of the lack of patients that were on this floor, he hadn't seen one since he got there.

Finally after 7 minutes of stumbling over himself, screaming, knocking out nurses, and torturing himself, he saw Ran.

She was walking slowly down the hallway crying, and her face was still full of anger and hate. He'd never seen Ran like that before.

"Ran! Please I NEED to talk to you! You don't understand how sorry I am, if you would just listen, you would understand Ran!" Conan ran faster than ever trying to catch up to her. Surprisingly, she didn't walk and faster or slower, or even act as if she heard him. She just kept her head down, and continued walking.

"Ran!?! HELLO?" He had finally caught up to her and was grasping her shirt with his hand, which was also bleeding from falling. He was limping and used her for some support. He could barely keep up, but he still wouldn't give up yet.

"Ran… Please stop walking… you and I, we are in danger, the people that are after me… they are here… that's why I couldn't tell you, because something like this would happen… Ran I'm so sorry… PLEASE stop walking! RAN?!?" She never glanced at him once, never slowed down or stopped, or even sped up. Once again, she just kept on walking. Conan, just kept on holding onto her, his eyes never stopped looking into hers; they were waiting for her to look back into his.

She didn't.

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After 2 minutes of walking, two minutes of ignoring and 2 minutes of dragging Conan, Ran stopped.

"T-Thank you Ran… you have no idea how much this means to me… please just listen, come back, there is so much you need to kno-"

But before Conan could finish his sentence, Ran grabbed his face, and fiercely pulled him off of her and dropped him on the ground.

Conan yelped in pain and grabbed his ankle. He then looked up at Ran. He was completely stunned. This was worse than any nightmare he'd ever had of what she might do when he told her the truth.

She stood there for a few seconds, and then finally looked at Conan for the fist time since she had left the room.

She gave him that look. The one on all of the TV shows, and movies that he had seen. The look that was always given when the person was saying 'This is goodbye… for good'

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After that she began to walk slowly again down the hall.

Shinichi was destroyed. His heart had been shattered into a billion pieces. Ran never wants to have anything to do with me again… she hates me… and its no one else's fault except for mine…

Conan sat there and watched her walk. She was indeed crying, but from here, he couldn't tell what emotion that she was crying for. For all he knew, she could be laughing and crying at the same time for how stupid he was. That's it… its all over… I have no reason to live anymore… He thought. He had never felt this low in his whole life before.

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After thinking for about 30 seconds, debating on what he should do now, he stood up, and began to run after her once again. He knew how stupid he was to be doing this, but he kept running. I'm not giving up. I'm not going to lose her yet… I'll kill myself before never seeing her again and knowing that I gave up. Ran, I'm coming… I'll fix this somehow…

"Ran! WAIT! I'm NOT giving up! PLEASE JUST LISTEN!" He was once again chasing after her, stumbling, tripping, and gasping for breath. Please give me one more chance…

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Why isn't he giving up? Why does he care so much?!? Shinichi, I wish you would just leave me alone, don't you see? I never want to see you again! JUST LEAVE ME ALONE! She saw him at the corner of her eye, then felt him grab onto her shirt. She saw the blood that was trickling down his hand. What happened to you? She kept walking, making sure not to give him eye contact. She tried as hard as she could to act as if he wasn't there.

"Ran… Please stop walking… you and I, we are in danger, the people that are after me… they are here… that's why I couldn't tell you, because something like this would happen… Ran I'm so sorry… PLEASE stop walking! RAN?!?"

Whos after you Shinichi? She tried as hard as she could to keep the questions inside.

He was hurting her so much, it was unbearable. She couldn't stand it anymore… she couldn't hold it in. Finally a fraction of her anger escaped, and she lifted him off of her and dropped him onto the ground. His yelp pierced at her heart. Shinichi… I'm so sorry… She stood there for a second then looked at him one last time. Words never left her mouth, but clearly her message was understood. Shinichi… good bye…

She began to walk again and finally let her tears of sorrow escape. She was so sad, and was regretting every second of what she was doing, but she couldn't help herself… this it what was meant to be. He had betrayed her… He had never trusted her enough to tell her who he really was until she was in danger. What kind of friend was that? She had also told him everything… all of her feelings for him. He had also seen her naked before, and watched her cry for him like a little baby. He probably laughed behind her back at all of this.

He had taken total advantage of her, and for this, she would never talk to him again. She still loved him somewhere in her heart… but that was no where near enough to ever forgive him.

So, she kept on walking.

She walked, and confident that he wouldn't follow her again this time… but she was corrected on that thought after she got halfway down the hallway, when she heard him get up and start running towards her again screaming.

"Ran! WAIT! I'm NOT giving up! PLEASE JUST LISTEN!"

Her heart stopped. So did her legs. What?!? Why isn't he giving up? I need to do something to make him stop… But what? He's making all of this so hard for me… Shinichi just stop it! The only way I can end all of this pain is to…

With that thought, she did the unthinkable.

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He was once again running towards her screaming at the top of his lungs for her to stop. He wasn't going to give up yet. Not until she heard the whole story, once she has, she can either love me again, or hate my guts still for the rest of her life… wither way… all I can do is know that at least she knows the whole story. With that, I'll try and be satisfied…

After a few seconds she stopped. She just stood there for a while, staring into space.

Has she finally decided to give me a chance? He kept running towards her. He tried to forget the pain he was in, but he couldn't, it just got worse.

Ran then turned around and looked at him, then at the doctors' tray that was sitting outside one of the rooms, then back at him. What is she doing?

She ran over to it and grabbed at least five needles, a small cutting knife, and scissors. What the hell? Is she going to do I think she's going to-

She gave him an unreadable look and ran down the hall, then turned into a bathroom that had a sign that said patients only.

"RAN NOOO! DON'T DO IT! PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!" Conan yelled louder than ever, and ran faster than ever too. He got to the door, and began to bang on it as loud as he could.

"RAN DON'T!!! The only reason I never told you, I wanted to keep you safe, I thought that if I told you, someone would find out, and that it would put you in danger!" He was crying now, and his banging began to weaken, then it grew stronger, as kicking was added.

After the door still didn't open, he screamed louder, and went to last resort. Being in my own body to tell her doesn't matter anymore… this might be the only way she listens…

"But all of that isn't even half of it… I didn't tell you because Ran…" He stopped, and then said happier than ever, "RAN, I LOVE YOU! I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU! Why would I have chosen to live with you if I didn't trust you, if I didn't love you!?! RAN! NOW YOU KNOW HOW I REALLY FEEL! And I'm not just saying it because I want you to stop, it's because I want you to understand! I want you to know! I just want you to be happy, that's all I've ever wanted! I want you to be safe! But I obviously failed on that, because now we are both in danger!" He stopped banging.

"Ran, I'll understand if you never want to see me again, or talk to me, or even hear about me, but as long as you know what really happened, and what my real reasons are, I guess I'll have to learn to live with that. As long as you know that I love you… I'll HAVE to live with that…" He stopped talking, and fell to his knees and held tightly to the door.

>>>>>

She was listening the whole time. Her heart was skipping beats with every sentence he spoke.

"RAN DON'T!!! The only reason I never told you, I wanted to keep you safe, I thought that if I told you, someone would find out, and that it would put you in danger!"

She was beginning to feel sorry for him; even though every part of her was telling her he didn't deserve any of her sorrow. She couldn't control it anymore. She held her breath, hoping to hear him say more. Then it came, the sentence she had been waiting almost 5 years to hear him say.

"RAN, I LOVE YOU! I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU! Why would I have chosen to live with you if I didn't trust you, if I didn't love you!?! RAN! NOW YOU KNOW HOW I REALLY FEEL!"

Her heart stopped. He does love me… She then began to feel regret for all the pain she was putting him through… she hated herself more than she hated him.

She loved him again, now more than ever, and she was beginning to lose control of her feelings again. That's when the last sentence left his mouth.

"-as you know what really happened, and what my real reasons are, I guess I'll have to learn to live with that. As long as you know that I love you… I'll HAVE to live with that…"

She heard him slide down the door and begin to breathe very fiercely.

>>>>>

Her heart was pounding madly. She dropped everything she was holding, including all of the doctors equipment she was planning on ending her life with. She then opened the door, picked Conan up, put him up against the wall, then kissed him with all of the love in her heart.

It didn't take him long at all to kiss her back. After about a minute, Shinichi broke the kiss and said with a weak smile, "I guess this means you forgive me?"

She smiled back and said "Yea, but I can't believe I'm kissing an 8 year old!"

"He-" Conan began to argue back, but she pushed him into another kiss, cutting him off. His heart was pounding faster than a horse's hooves on a race track, and he was loving every second of it.

Both of them had never been this happy in their life, and in an odd, painful sort of way, they both enjoyed everything about it.

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(PHEW) Finally finished took me two nights, but its done. I think I should've made it into two chapters, but I just had to keep it in one, it all just fit together! Thanks once again so much for all of your love, support, and reviews. It really helps me. Also thanks for your gratitude, it makes me feel loved you have no idea how much you are all helping me! Next chapter, black organization finally strikes! Ill try and update soon!