Ch 9:

Woody felt himself at a loss now, no more clues to follow, not even a breadcrumb. She had fallen out of the tree, there was no denying that, but she had killed herself a long time before that.

Woody, you ever wonder what it would be like to die?

Her voice stung his thoughts; he felt a cold, icy feeling run into the pit of his stomach. He sat on the floor he had no idea how long he sat there, in shocked silence. Finally, like awaking from a dream, he stood, pocketed the book and walked out. The sun was just rising over the darkness, sending gray light up into the shadowy night. He looked down at his clock, surprised at how early in the morning it was, almost five a.m. He couldn't think of anything else to do.

So he went to the supermarket. The supermarket was a funny place at five a.m. a slew of different people from all over the city seemed to pass by, not noticing each other. A woman in a cocktail dress was buying cigarette's men getting off of a late night job was buying beer, bread and cheese. Another man, Woody noticed in ragged clothes and a dirty face was walking slowly down each isle putting luxury items into his cart, smoked oysters and artichoke hearts. Woody knew the man was homeless, he wanted very much to give him some money, hell, he wanted to buy him the entire cart of food, but somehow, he thought that would spoil that mans fantasy, of being just another customer, he left him in the condiment isle comparing two different kinds of salad dressings.

Woody bought what he needed, Tomato sauce, breadcrumbs, parsley and oregano. Everything else he had at home. Returning home with his purchases he chopped and boiled until the smell of spaghetti sauce filled his tiny apartment. He settled down on the couch, feeling the heaviness of the book in his pocket for the first time. He lifted it out and set it on the coffee table in front of him. Images crossed his mind, like grainy home movies and freeze frames. A great heaviness seemed to lift off him.

He would never forget her, all the things she was, and could have been. He remembered she loved French toast, horseback riding and dancing. She loved the rain and salt on her cantaloupe, her favorite color was green, the same color as her eyes. They had inside jokes and car rides through the country. He also knew she was sick; she never thought she was good enough because she was never told she was.

He had to wonder what it was like for her, to have that weight on her shoulders everyday. To walk through the world seeing that everyone else had problems but they seemed to bare it better, they didn't have the hollow sound in their voice, and they didn't get angered and break a cutting board. Then it all of a sudden seemed too much, it was over, so she went to sleep, not sure of what to do. When she woke up, she had a smile on her face. She had a dream, and it made her feel the peace and freedom she had been longing for.

But she goes on, day-by-day, slow, time was a wound in her heart that bled and wouldn't stop, and finally, after a week, she felt the emptiness like lead inside her. So she climbed the tree. Knowing Annie, Woody guess that she probably went up there and thought she would be coming back down, with her faith in impulse it was at that last second when she looked down she saw her life, a tangled mess under her. So she smiled, looking up at the cloudless sky. And time stopped… at that second, that heaviness lifted and she was living in the past, and tumbling towards her future. That's where he left her, once again with that freeze frame, that cinematic measure that kept her from ever hitting the ground. Her hair, long and unruly, falling upwards around her face, her blouse bellowing outwards by the wind. And she felt peace.

Woody struggled to read her words, in her soft, feminine handwriting. Woody knew that he would be okay, sure he loved Annie, he would always love her, but he could love Jordan too and did. It would be a slow process, with all of her "issues" but he could wait, he was good at that, and she was worth it.

He went out onto his roof, for perspective, to see what he could see. The night was unseasonably warm. Slowly he stepped out onto the railing, as Annie had once done. Feeling the world spin. He saw the street beneath him and for an instance he wanted to feel the rush of wind as he fell towards the ground. But the feeling left as soon as it came.

He stepped down, and smiled, he had to be at work in a few hours, and he had to see Jordan.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Jordan came over for dinner; they had struck a uneasiness since their kiss on the porch. She was becoming a little spooked; he could see it in her eyes, the restlessness. He found himself doing most of the talking, he chatted about work, about the latest case they were working on, the new gadget Nigel had gotten for Christmas. Finally, after dinner they sat on the couch, looking at each other uncomfortably, When Jordan backed away from him when he wrapped his arm around her.

"Ok out with it." He said, turning to face her, she looked confused.

"What are you talking about?" she tried to cover, but a flush crept over her face.

"Come on Jordan." He warned, she saw how the dark circles on his eyes had appeared, and how thin he had become, she sighed and gave in.

"Woody, can you love me and her at the same time?" she felt as if the ton of bricks that had been residing on her shoulders since they had left Kewaunee had been lifted.

He looked stunned for a minute and then sighed. "So this is what this is about?" he said with a small chuckle. She nodded and looked at him worriedly, his face turned suddenly serious. "Jordan, I love her for all she was… I love you for all you are." With that he leaned down, lightly brushing his lips against hers. "Jordan Elizabeth Cavanaugh, your favorite color is pink, you like brown sugar on your rice, your mother was murdered when you were ten, you love the rolling stones and the indigo girls… you chipped your tooth when you were in the first grade, you laughed when you got your first kiss…" this time it was her to lean up and kiss him, silencing him quick.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

When Woody woke up he was smiling, climbing out of bed, he fumbled around for the small book in which Annie kept her dreams, hidden from the rest of the world. Slowly he turned to the first available blank page in it he wrote the last entry. His handwriting a stark contrast to Annie's

Nov. 3rd 2005

I had a dream… I was standing with a brunette and a red head on either side. The brunette walked up to me, gracefully, and lead me home. The red head smiled, and waved goodbye… and there I was in the middle. Then the dream shifted and I was standing in the morgue, looking down at the red heads body. Then I saw the coroner, it was Devan, with her blond hair, and blue eyes. She was standing next to me, a smile on her face. Then I whisper, "She was quite a girl." I wasn't sure if I was talking to myself or not. She nodded and whispered admiringly without a hint of sarcasm "Yes she was."

The End

Woody with that slipped the book into a drawer, one day he would open it again, but it wouldn't be for a long time, he knew that much. He would keep his knowledge a secret to everyone, no one else had to know, her death was ruled a accident and that's what it was a tragic accident. Maybe keeping his secret was a gift he could give them both.

With that he turned and left, returning to bed, where Jordan slept soundly. She rustled a bit and smiled at him. "What were you doing?" she asked her eyes and hair mussed with sleep."

"Nothing Honey, just saying some unspoken words."

The End.