A Neon Genesis: Evangelion Vignette.
"And yet we live," remarked the other boy's soft voice.
And so they did. Stretched out on a white sand beach, Shinji could feel the foam of the surf tickling his toes, the warm sun on his skin… and the hand gently stroking his hair. His head lay in the lap of a boy who had never been born as a human, yet who had said, 'I think I must have been born to meet you.' It was comfortable.
"I guess I realized that a life of uncertainty is better than nothing at all," Shinji answered quietly. The sea, he realized, was water again; no longer the red blood of the would-be apocalypse. He alone had held the entire destiny of mankind in his grasp: to choose life or death. He'd nearly chosen death… until touching the minds of his friends and family had made him see that his life – the lives of everyone – were worth living.
"I am very glad of that, Shinji-kun."
The scent of the seashore… that was what his name meant, literally. Kaworu Nagisa. They were together… on some island. Shinji didn't even know it's name… or even care, really. It was somewhere near Japan, and that was enough.
"What do we have to do now?" Shinji asked, somewhat subdued. After all they'd faced, after all he'd done… what now?
Kaworu's hand slid down onto his cheek, cool and gentle, "Now we do whatever suits us. I was once the Angel of Free Will… If anyone ever deserved that blessing, then it must be you."
A flush spreading into his cheeks, Shinji turned his head to look up into the other boy's eyes. "Kaworu… I'm sorry, for before. I…" He what? He killed his truest friend, the one he actually came to love. What words could erase that crime?
"You did as I asked you to," replied the other in a soothing tone. "And now, I live again… without the cursed fate of those born of Adam, to destroy the Lilim." He reached down to lift Shinji into his lap, hugging him from behind, and whispered, "All that is past… is past. I love you, Shinji."
The war between 'Angels' and mankind, between the children of Adam and the children of Lilith, was a struggle of reality upon itself. None of that mattered now, though. Kaworu still loved him, and they were alive. Shinji twisted around in the other's embrace, hugging him back. "I… I love you, too… I wanted you to know. I always wanted you to…"
Lifting an arm to place a finger delicately over Shinji's lips, Kaworu smiled knowingly and shook his head. "No, Shinji-kun. You have no more need to apologize to me, or try to prove yourself. You are who you are… and you have accepted me. What more could I ever want?"
Looking deeply into Kaworu's deep crimson eyes, Shinji finally saw the inner peace he'd sought for so long… reflected back from within himself. For an instant, panic seized him, and he wanted to flee… but he hardly had time to think his old mantra, I mustn't run away. He thrust forward, pushing Kaworu's hand aside, and leaned in to kiss his angel with all the passion and innocence of one who has never really kissed anyone before.
That moment was divine, and as the complicated world fell away, both boys were quite certain they could hear the Ode to Joy ringing out from within their very souls.
Author's Notes:
This was inspired by the Some Blissful Dream series by Lorelei Jones, and is fondly offered up in the same wonderful spirit as her own stories.
I know I haven't touched "Free Will" again yet, for those who were wanting to see more. I'm sorry... I've just got a LOT of writing projects right now. It isn't forgotten, I promise.
