Life without Living,
Breath without Life
Chapter three: The Healing ProcessWow. I can't believe how slow at updating I'm being… I'm so sorry. I'm having serious problems with writers block, so will be trying to right a series of song fics, first one, maybe second as well will be put up on before this chapter. I'm really desperate for a beta reader, because sometimes when I'm rereading my stories after I've posted them, I notice the mistakes and wrong wording, if you could beta my fics, then hopefully it'd get a lot better (Also someone who could kick me up the but when I'm being too slow in posting. Please leave a reply in a review. Thanks so much. Sorry this is so short…
Eyes
Disclaimer:
I don't own Gundam Wing or Harry Potter. There are a few of my own characters but most of them belong to either J.K Rowling, or the people who wrote Gundam Wing. I'm never quite sure who that is.
Warnings:
OOC Heero and Wufei. Yaoi and, slight language, plus slight violence.
Last time:
"We're not going to allow him to get hurt anymore… and anyone who does will pay…" Fred and George exchanged glances; this was a new side of Duo… "We'll help you in that!" They chorused.
Three weeks into term
This was it. The big day. It was the day when Heero Yuy was going to have his first flying lesson (on a broomstick that is.) His first few weeks had been interesting to say the least; he had been having extra tuition from both Professor McGonagal and Professor Nando, along with advice from his classmates, and was about the standard of most of the other first years, having been extremely quick to catch on, and was now only lacking on the practise.
He was still by far the most timid and skinniest boy ever to be seen at Hogwarts, and Wufei was beginning to think that he'd never put on weight. His face still had a haunted, sunken look about it, and just about all his ribs and most of his bones were still countable. In addition, during his years on the streets, he'd put aside some odd habits. Wufei would often see him put half of what he ate in his pocket, saving it for later, despite all of Wufei's gentle reminders that he could help himself to food whenever he wanted, he never really realised it. In the end, Wufei just let it go, he figured that if it made him more comfortable, Heero could do whatever he wanted, just as long as he ate decent proportions of food at meal times, any extra food couldn't hurt. Wufei's other main worry with Heero was how he rarely looked someone in the eye, and when walking around, would always keep his head bowed. It was as if he thought himself unworthy of looking at other people and was yet another habit Wufei hoped to break. The last of Heero's new habits was apologising for the slightest little thing, even if it wasn't his fault. During his years away from the other pilots, he hadn't come to terms with the people he had killed as they had. When they had woken from nightmares, or felt the guilt weigh down on their shoulders, they had always had each other to help them off the ground, but Heero, he had been alone. Due to this fact, he had allowed his guilt to build up, and up, and up, until it got to the stage that he blamed himself for the slightest little thing.
Personality-wise, Heero was greatly different than he had been during the war years, he was still just as quiet if not quieter, and rarely spoke to anyone out the circle of his room mates (including Fred and George). It was a sight which distinctly amused the professors, Fred and George, already registered trouble makers, had taken Heero under their wing as much as Wufei. No one ever even dared to think about causing trouble for Heero, if they did, they would suffer the wrath of Wufei, Quatre and Trowa, along with constantly being the butt of every single one of Fred, George's and Duo's pranks. Not worth risking as far as most people were concerned. Heero now however, was not only quiet, but shy and timid as well, in previous years, if plans weren't going his way, out with the gun! However, now, Heero barely gave his opinion, yet alone tried to reinforce it. If anyone came near him who he didn't recognise, he would cower away, and if he felt threatened, he would either back away or freeze up completely. Most of his nights were filled with nightmares, and he nearly always woke up in tears. Some of the time one of the other pilots woke up, but he frequently was alone. This built up to him thinking that sleep was his punishment for his war crimes, so he didn't tell the other pilots about his dreams, not wanting to be a bother. Wufei suspected that he wasn't sleeping well judging by the dark circles surrounding his eyes, but didn't' want Heero to become too dependent on him, so left it to him to tell him himself, however, if the problem wasn't resolved soon, then he would step in.
Heero walked towards the flying pitch along with Wufei and the others with mixed feelings. He thought it would be a fascinating to take to the air outside of his mobile suit, to be able to feel the wind caressing his skin, to see the world from a different viewpoint. The reason he hadn't started flying yet, was purely he wasn't strong enough; he didn't have the body weight nor physical strength to keep on his broom against the high wind force. Heero's only cause of nerves was for making a fool of himself, this was the only class which he hadn't been able to gather much information from his textbooks. He didn't want to be unable to call his broomstick to him, or maybe not even get off the ground when he was sitting on it, the number of ways which he could mess up and make Wufei and the others ashamed of him were countless to his eyes.
Duo, having ran ahead, was the first to reach the pitch and greeted the professor with a cheery "good morning Professor" the others arrived at a more leisurely pace, and eventually the Gryffindors and Ravenclaw's were lined up with a broom beside each of them. "Ok class," called out Professor Hooch, "remember, a nice firm up to call the broom to your hand." Saying so, she stretched out her hand, and called the broom to her. Heero nervously stuck out his hand, hearing everyone around him shouting. "Up" he barely whispered, the broom didn't respond. "Please… up?" he tried again. Still, the stubborn broom remained motionless. 'Please broom… up… please… I don't want to disappoint Wufei… I don't want him to leave me… please… work… please…' he thought desperately. "Up" he repeated, voice wavering, to his horror he noticed that he was the only one whose broom was still on the ground "try saying it in a firmer voice Mr. Yuy," came the voice of his trainer, Professor Hooch or something along those lines, "you mustn't say it nervously, just use a firm voice, like you were telling an animal what to do," Heero looked around anxiously, everyone's eyes were on him, looking at him as he failed again, he got ready to either dodge or block the blow which was sure to come for his failure. His breathing quickened slightly in alarm, and Wufei, realising what was happening, for this wasn't the first time he had panicked when he couldn't do something, gently laid a hand on his shoulder, "Heero, calm down," he murmured soothingly, "this isn't J's lab, your not going to be punished for being unable to do something. At the contact, Heero started slightly, but at Wufei's words calmed him down significantly. "Sorry…" he muttered, "don't worry, now try again, but you have to believe that you can do it, same as I do." Was the reply, it was hearing that Wufei believed he could do it raised Heero's self-confidence slightly, if Wufei believed he could do, then he could! With renewed determination, he held his hand over the stick once more, "broom up!" he said quietly, but firmly. The broom instantly leapt up off the floor and straight into his hand. Heero felt a smile blossom over his face as he was rewarded with a quick applause by the rest of his class, he didn't fail! Professor Hooch sent a smile flying over to him as she mounted her broom and motioned for the class to do so.
As soon as Heero was sitting on the broom, such a feeling of righteousness swept over him, it was if he had been meant to do this his whole life, for his whole life, he had never belonged anywhere, with the other pilots, he had much harsher training than they, after the wars, he was useless. As he thought, he realised the only place he had been slightly comfortable was when he was in Zero, but even then he had been besieged by claustrophobia, and the guilt of stealing innocent lives. Here, it just felt right. Professor Hooch wandered down the line, slightly correcting various people's positions or handgrips, when she came to Heero and the other ex-pilots, no corrections were necessary. "Ok class, on my whistle I'd like you all to push up and hover a little bit above the land. One… two… three!" The first years immediately pushed up, Heero, although he had the grip right, pushed up to hard and he went sailing above the others. "Heero!" called up Wufei, "come down a bit, you've come up too high!" Heero nodded slightly, fingers clasped tightly round the handle of the broom, and tried to move downwards, but instead continued rising, one of the girls screamed as his broom gave a huge buck all of a sudden!" "Having fun there?" yelled a new voice everyone immediately looked around, and saw an unknown man, dressed in black but not in the style of a death eater, wand out and pointed at Heero. "all of you! Get down to the ground… now! Or he gets it!" saying so, he made Heero's broom give another huge buck, almost unseating the boy.
Everyone quickly flew to the ground, unwilling to risk the boy's life any further, "what do you want?" snapped Madame Hooch, immediately grabbing her wand "leave the poor boy alone!" "now now…" murmured the man, making Heero's broom start a bucking fit "put that nasty thing away… you might hurt someone, and as to what I want? Well… both the Dark Lord and I want him! Accio broom!" The broom, with Heero barely clinging on, went flying towards the man, "HEERO!" yelled Wufei in panic, "hush it brat!" yelled back the man, grabbing Heero's broom, and pulling the terrified boy off it. "Let him go… now…" snarled Wufei, taking his wand out as discreetly possible, "and if I don't?" laughed the man, "crucio!" he yelled pointing the wand at Heero, "NO!" screamed Wufei, "expelliarmus!" with a bang, the wand jumped out of the enemy wizard's hand, and fell a few meter's behind him, however, quicker than anyone could move, he pulled a knife and held it the sobbing boy's neck. "Try anything else…" he threatened stepping backwards slowly until he reached his wand. Bending down slowly, he picked it up, keeping one hand by Heero's neck at all times. It was while this was happening, that reflexes Heero didn't even know he still had, kicked in. He grabbed the threatening arm, and with strength fuelled by fear, threw him over his shoulder. With a yell of surprise, the man crashed down onto the earth, still clutching his wand, "crucio!" he yelled, causing Heero to collapse with pain once more. "Heero!" yelled his roommates, and ran towards the downed boy, but the man lashed his wand arm towards them, "state!" 1 he yelled, and all of a sudden, all were frozen still! The man smirked slightly, "now… where were we? Oh yes… CRUCIO!" Heero screamed allowed his agony, it hurt… so much! His tormenter let loose a cruel laugh "brat! Thought you could escape? Weakling!"
Heero lay there, curled up in a ball, panting from the pain that filled his every nerve, stretching them to the breaking point. Feeling a foot pressing down on his spinal chord, he tried to roll away, but was prevented. Instead, the foot rolled him so he could face his friends, all frozen with identical expressions of rage or horror etched into their faces. "Who will die first?" Asked the man, "you get to choose and kill them yourself… and if you don't choose; then their pain will be worse than anything you've ever experienced brat!" Heero closed his eyes, trying his best to clear his mind; he needed to think, and fast! If not, everyone else here would die because of him! He allowed the feel of the earth to spring into his fingertips, convincing him he was still alive and able to feel even if his nerves did feel like they'd been split in half.
All of a sudden, the Earth started pulsing warmly between his fingers, he opened his eyes slightly in surprise, and seeing how close the stranger had come, shut his eyes again in terror. The earth, it seemed, responded to this terror, with a sudden surge of ground where the man was standing, caused him to look around in surprise "what the!" he managed to get out as the ground towered over him, he dodged away and glared at Heero lying on the ground, "why you…" He lunged at Heero, intending to body bind him, but the ground once again came to Heero's rescue. This time, it pushed him up to his feet, and made him dodge the spell flying his way! Then, the ground underneath the man suddenly surged up, lifting him rapidly, leaving Heero free to move once again. Heero leapt to his feet, unsure of this new development. With a quick glance towards his friends, he saw they were still unmoving. It was up to him.
Clenching his fists, Heero recalled his war days, something he had been trying so hard to forget. He remembered how he felt when engaging in one on one combat, how he ignored pain. He would need to be how he used to be otherwise his year-mates would be killed. Unconsciously, he straightened until his body was as upright as if he was on parade. Taking slow, menacing steps towards the downed man, he glared as coldly as he could, forcing every bit of emotionless possible into his eyes. "What do you want?" he growled threateningly once he was just steps away from the dark Wizard. "No-nothing" stuttered the man, frightened now he didn't have the upper hand. "Why were you sent?" Pressed Heero even colder than before. "Be-because you're an Elementalist! Please don't kill me!" he half cried in terror. Suddenly, quicker than an eye-blink he had his wand pointed at Heero's chest. "You can't kill me from that distance boy." He sneered, his frightened façade instantly disappearing, "The Dark Lord ordered me what to do in this situation…I'd have enjoyed hurting you some more… but never mind!" with those words, he narrowed his eyes and muttered "Avada Kavada!"
Time seemed to slow down as the green light headed strait for him. The rest of the world faded out until it was just Heero and the light. Heero knew there wasn't time for him to dodge, so he did the only thing remaining for him. Knowing it was useless, he lifted his left hand as if to catch it. His arm moved at the same pace as the rest of the world, as if it was heavily weighed down. The wind seemed to pick up, stirring angrily, focusing at his hand it felt like, but still the green bullet came onwards. Heero scrunched his eyes, unwilling to watch his death come head-on. At the last millisecond, time speeded back up to normal, and the green light hit his outstretched palm. As contact initiated, the wind blew up with renewed fury. It lashed at the green bolt, holding it steady, forcing it backwards, away from Heero's hand. The sneer slowly disappeared off the man's face, and horror replaced it. "Avada Kavada!" he roared again, sending another spell raging to join the first, but the winds were too strong! It pushed harder and harder at the spells sending the further and further back towards the wand which made them. It was at this point Heero opened his eyes, astounded at still being alive. "You're dead," he said coldly to the man, and with a final push the twin green orb's were sent flying back to their maker. The man's eyes widened in shock, rapidly followed by horror as the green lights hit him in the chest knocking to the floor. It was the last thing he ever did.
On the man's death, the spell holding the first year's and teacher broke. Wufei immediately ran over to the shocked Heero, still standing with his outstretched hand unmoving. "Heero…" he said as he got closer, realising that Heero might well strike him next in this state of shock. " Heero" he repeated not seeing any reaction. "He's dead Heero, I'm here now." Madame Hooch ran over as well having sent two Gryffindors off to get Professor Dumbledore. "Stay back for a second Professor" ordered Wufei, "He's still in shock, he might still attack." Madame Hooch nodded and stopped where she was, and turned back to the rest of her class, "is anyone hurt?" she asked and proceeded to calm down the scared first years. Wufei tuned her out, and placed all his attention on Heero as he walked slowly towards him. "Heero," he called again "It's me Wufei, you're safe now." Heero lowered his arm slightly at Wufei's name, and his mouth whispered the word. "Yes, that's right, it's me. Wufei, Wu-chan." Upon hearing the nickname, Heero swung round in seconds and flung himself at Wufei, desperate for comfort to soothe him. Wufei opened his arms and swept them round the shaking teen lowering both of them to the ground. "You're fine Heero, he's gone now. You saved us all." Heero still said nothing, just leaned on Wufei, still shaking as he worked the fear out of his system. Several moments later, Duo, Quatre, and Trowa, deeming it to be safe walked over and laid their hands on the shoulder of the hero.
That day marked a changing point in Heero's life. After an all night talking session with the other ex-pilots, he finally began to truly believe that he wasn't completely guilty for his war actions. No one, not even him, were sure of what had inspired this change, but the words Wufei and the other's were trying to hammer into his head were finally beginning to sink in. It was that day also that the other pilots told Heero about the New War, Heero instantly wanted in. They continued training in private, bringing Heero back up to his old physical standards, and studying as many new spells as possible. Heero was amazing. There was no other way to put it. He was a complete natural, mastering new spells in seconds. As for his…other abilities, Wufei reckoned that Heero was controlling the elements. He could move the wind and earth with ease, and they hadn't tried other's yet. Heero also performed wand-less magick, but they decided to keep this from the teachers, unknowing of who they were able to trust…
1 Stare- Latin (to stand)- state (pronounced startay) is the plural imperative (imperative meaning an order) of that (I think I got it right) I don't know if there was a spell to freeze people, so I made one up
