Lemme get the disclaimers out of the way:

1) If you don't like a Zel/Lina pairing, don't read. There's no Amelia or Gourry bashing, but they aren't in the story either. Like, at all.

2) I don't own even a tiny, infinitesimal part of Slayers anime or mangas or the Slayers characters. Shame, really…'cause like everybody else, I wish I did. ((sigh)) So please don't sue me, and all that junk – I have nothing of value. Really. Unless you're a rabid collector of anime action figures and memorabilia, fantasy and horror novels, and various comic books…and then you'll have to get in line with the rest of the yahoos.

Ain't got no money, though. Sorry! XP

((This is a re-edited version - I wanted to fix the formatting so my comments here and at the end don't run into the actual story like they did in the first submission. I'd also like to say a humongous THANK YOU! to Holyturtlemonkeys for the helpful and encouraging first review from my previous submission. I think I know what I'm doing now with submissions, so there'll be no further messing around with taking down stories and putting 'em up again! Anyhoo, on with the show...))


Let's imagine, dear Reader, that we've come across Lina Inverse and Zelgadis Greywords relaxing late at night at an inn somewhere. Anywhere will do. Now, imagine that their conversation somehow becomes a game of Truth or Dare. What trick might Lina pull to ensure that she wins? Read on for an excerpt from Lina and Zel's midnight Truth or Dare game – when Lina decides on the spur of the moment to raise the stakes.

"Now it's your turn to answer, Lina. Truth or dare?"

"Truth. What's your question?"

Zelgadis cleared his throat and tried to look nonchalant. "Um…"

"C'mon, Zel! Do you have a question or don't you?"

"I do! I-I'm just thinking of how to phrase it, that's all."

"Right." Lina rolled her eyes. "If you can't think of anything to ask li'l ol' me..."

"Okay, fine." Zel took a deep breath. "What really happens when…ahem…whenit'sthattimeofthemonth?"

Lina cocked her head. "What was that last part?"

Zel coughed into his hand, a flush spreading across his face. "I said…er…what happens…when it's 'that time of the month.'"

Lina's eyes widened. "What do you mean what happens when it's 'that time of the month?' Don't you know?"

Zel's flush got deeper. "Well, I know that…during that time…girls who practice magic lose their powers for a few days. And that they get really cranky, too."

"And you think that's it, that's all that happens?"

Zel smirked a little. "Are you going to answer the question or not?"

Lina thought quickly. On one hand, she wanted to fireball Zel into the next kingdom for asking such a personal question. On the other hand, they were playing Truth or Dare, and Lina wasn't about to lose to Zel for not answering. If Zel really wanted to know the truth…Lina hid a grin behind her hand. On his head be the consequences, then.

"Oh, I'll answer it. You sure you want to know?"

Zel looked up, surprised. "You mean there is something else that happens?"

Lina kept a straight face with difficulty. "Yep. You ready for the truth, Zel?"

"Well, yes, I suppose so. I mean, how bad could it be?"

Lina had to bite her tongue.

"All right, I'll tell you."

She told him. She told him EVERYTHING, in great detail.

"-and that's what girls have to go through during 'that time of the month.' Satisfied?"

"…"

"Zel?"

"That…that's…Lina, that's disgusting!"

Lina smirked openly and shrugged. "Hey, you said you wanted to know."

"I-I know, but…I had no idea…!" Zel's blue-skinned face took on a sickly green hue.

"I don't believe it!" Lina giggled. "The 'Heartless, Dark and Mysterious Swordsman' Zelgadis Greywords is totally undone, not to mention clueless, about a natural function of all women! Geez, Zel, you know where babies come from, don't you? Then what's the big deal?"

Zel swallowed thickly. "I figured something else happened, but…gods, Lina, did you have to be so – graphic?"

Lina smiled sweetly. "I wanted to make sure you thoroughly understood the answer to the question you asked, that's all. If that included a step-by-step explanation of the whole process-"

"Okay, I get your point," Zel interjected, still a little green around the gills. "Please don't tell me again."

"If you say so," Lina replied, grinning. While waiting for Zel to regain his composure, a devilish idea popped into her mind. Lina got up out of the armchair she was curled up in and sauntered over to the couch where Zel was seated.

"Lina, what-"

"It's more comfortable over here," she explained, plopping down a few inches from Zel. "Closer to the fire, and all that."

"Oh." Zel closed his eyes and leaned his head back. "So…have you decided on a truth or a dare for me?"

"Gimme a minute. I'm still thinking."

"All right." Behind closed eyes, Zelgadis tried (somewhat unsuccessfully) to erase the vivid images left from Lina's detailed answer from his mind. Gah, no wonder girls were so pale and spiteful during "that time"!

"Zel…"

Zel's eyes snapped open. Lina's face was a few inches from his, her ruby eyes staring directly into his startled sapphire ones.

"L-Lina, what-"

"Shhh. Relax." Lina placed a finger over his lips. "Zel, I think I know what I want to ask you…"

Zel was unable to reply. His body wouldn't move; his vocal chords refused to work.

Lina moved her head until her lips were almost brushing his ear. Her warm breath both terrified and exhilarated him. Gods, she was so close to him! He didn't know what had gotten into Lina, but he was aware in some dim corner of his mind that he didn't mind. Not at all.

"What," Zel's voice cracked, and he tried again. "What is it?"

"Zel…"

"Y-yes, Lina…?"

"I just wanted to ask…" Lina trailed off as she snuggled her body closer to his, raising his body temperature by several degrees. "Because I've got to know…"

Zel swallowed hard. Twice. Then once more for good measure.

Lina took one of Zelgadis' hands and entwined her fingers with his. At the contact Zel's face turned bright red, and he almost stopped breathing.

Lina nuzzled her nose against the pebbles on his neck.

"Zel," she said softly, "Would you? Could you? In the dark?"

Zelgadis, already in hormonal and sensory overload, did the most sensible thing he could.

He fainted.


Ehn, not the best ending in the world, but I couldn't think of anything else! Honest! ; It's my first attempt at a Zel/Lina fanfic, and I'm only proud of the fact that I actually finished it. Writing style sucks, but I'm more of an artist than an author. Aheh. But I had to give it a shot, try my best.

…if you could call that finished. There's plenty of opportunity for the story to continue, actually…

NYAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

((runs off to get some sleep before even attempting to write anything else))