Disclaimer: Don't sue me! I'm just a fan, I swear! Just a fan!
A/N: Hello, and welcome to my vignette. I'm just kind of getting my feet wet here, to be honest. I started writing a long-term fanfic for this fandom, in which Serpentina was slated as the main antagonist. Unfortunately that idea got scrapped, but I liked this character and the idea of what may have happened to the villains after the supers got relocated so much I decided to make this a vignette. So please enjoy my meager offering.
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The woman stalked down the austere chrome hallway, closely followed by a large entourage of black-clad assistants, many with pencils behind their ears and notepads at the ready for any new command their employer issued en route to her appointment. Miss Conda was infamous for her quick-draw orders, and her lack of toleration for anything less than perfect obedience from her assistants was legendary. The newest fluttered around the tall, lithe woman like cemetery moths while older employees fanned out around her. With liquid grace, Miss Conda sat in the sea foam chair placed in the waiting room of Qualutech Corporation's psychiatrist's office, crossing her legs and lacing her fingers together in a single smooth motion. There she sat silent, once again considering just who was to blame for this company-wide "mental health evaluation" idea, and how they would be punished. Several ideas came to mind, many of them involving pits and pointy implements of great variety. Miss Conda had to defuse her instinctive malicious giggles until they had degenerated into a single smirk that greatly worried all assistants within its range.
Her pale green eyes cut a glance over at the girl behind the desk across the room, who appeared completely engrossed in the images flashing on her computer screen. She was a recent hire, her resume flashed up in Miss Conda's mind. College graduate, suburban spawn; conspicuously generic, Miss Conda had to admit. She had yet to spot a hidden super among her employees, but the paranoia never quite left. The government had moved with shocking swiftness to quell the super crisis that had swept the nation so many years ago. In all the rush, very few had bothered to ask the question: with the heroes taken care of, what about the super-villains? Miss Annette Conda, as she was now called, had fared off quite a bit better than most of her peers. She had read the signs early on, slipped out of the game before any eyes got turned in her direction. And now here she was, her schedule nearly bursting at the seams, waiting on a damned psychiatrist. Miss Conda would have been surprised to know her frustration was mirrored in so many of her former nemeses across the country.
A telephone chirped on the girl's desk. She murmured into it, and then nodded Miss Conda towards the office door. One of the moths started to enter the office with her, only to find Miss Conda's arm barring his way, her hand just touching the doorjamb but still seeming as immovable as a steel beam. "I go alone," she said, and suddenly the door was slammed shut within an inch of the moth's nose, leaving him outside and Miss Conda inside the office.
"Please sit down, Serpentina," the doctor said, shuffling the notes from his last appointment. Dr. James Rivera was a small man, almost birdlike as he sat on the edge of his opulent black leather chair. He kept his gaze nailed to his desk as he spoke, "I'd like to thank you again for allowing me to decorate my office." He gestured at the wood-paneled walls and stacks of books loitering around the corners of the room, while still examining the intricate wood grain of his desk. "Also for hiring Jane to see to my schedule, she's been a treasure-"
Rivera was interrupted by a sigh that was almost a growl. When he looked up, Miss Conda, better known in some rather diminished circles as Serpentina, wore the wide, thick sunglasses used by cataract sufferers. Her anger was still palpable through the opaque lenses. "This is ridiculous," she hissed.
"But necessary," Rivera replied, "I believe eye-contact is important in my profession, but I will not risk my own life to do it. You must understand-"
"Can we get on with this?" Serpentina interrupted, bracing an elbow on the chair's arm and dragging her nails through her short, jet black hair, "Unlike you, I have real work to do."
Serpentina frowned deeply as she watched him scribble something down on his notepad. "Very well," the doctor said, and Serpentina settled in for the usual rundown. "How are you feeling?"
"Fine."
"Any bad dreams?"
"No."
"Any irrational thoughts of violence?"
"No."
"Any desires to commit illegal acts?"
"No."
"Any planning, even idle, of world domination or destruction?"
"No."
"Have you used your powers in any way, shape, or form since our last session?"
Serpentina looked at him, lowering the sunglasses until a sliver of her eyeballs was visible, "What do you think?"
Rivera fought the urge to scratch his brain, "The government knows most of your success is due to your hypnotic powers. We just want to know how long you intend to depend on them."
Serpentina smiled like a waning moon the night before Halloween, "Capitalism was made for super villains, doctor, haven't you noticed? Its basic principal is to do the best with what you have. And that's exactly what I have done."
"So you have finished expanding your fiscal empire?"
"Yes."
"All right then, I believe this appointment can be concluded."
"Thank you, doctor." Serpentina stood and went to the door. She paused with her hand on the doorknob, "Sssee you next ssssession."
Dr. Rivera spent the rest of the day trying to convince himself he had not seen a forked tongue slide out of Miss Conda's mouth.
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A/N: Ah, that was some fun, huh? Short and sweet, although I think mentioning "sweet" and "Serpentina" in the same thought is asking for evisceration. Anyway, I wasn't sure if it's a psychiatrist or a psychologist that would evaluate a corporate staff, and I didn't know if it's people with cataracts that get the big glasses. Did I guess right? Also, if I get a good response from this I think I'll go ahead with a long-term "Incredibles" idea that's been rolling around in my head for quite a while now. Anyone interested? Thanks goes to Lady Kayoss for letting me know my idea wasn't crap in the first place, but there's only one way for me to know if I should bother writing it out, folks...
