Disclaimer: Harry Potter dances away from my belongings... In other words, most of it dances towards JK Rowling... Oh the humiliation! #cries#

Please feel free to review (hint, hint) Constructive criticism is welcome, if however, you choose to flame me… I will come and hunt you down and hit you round the head with a large, random flying antelope.

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Authors Note: sheepishly enters Er...hey guys! cringes at angry glares Sorry about that! I know, I've just been so busy with school. Our school has building work being done on it. They have a lot to do and won't be finished till December. Our school is covered in scaffolding and green netting. You have to walk through hundreds of passages just to get in and out of the building. We have machines, drilling and hammering all day next to our windows. The builders were supposed to be fixing our roof to stop leaks but it is still dripping buckets of water and a builder put his foot through the roof while I was having an art lesson. So it has been kinda hard for our teachers to teach us so they usually just let us do our own thing. (You have to shout to be heard and they don't want to lose their voices) Yeah… so I've been spending most of my lessons drafting out plans for this story. (The teachers have been making up for lost lessons by giving us a ton of homework… joy. Why do we get homework anyway?)

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THIS CHAPTER IS DEDICATED TO MYSTICAL SPIRITS FOR BEING FABBITY FAB!

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Dear Diary,

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS. I REALLY CAN'T BELIEVE THIS! Sorry diary, you're probably wondering what I'm shouting about. Well let me tell you…

It all started when we got out of the common room. I noticed people staring at me but I didn't think much of it. Then this stupid little fourth year and her gang of friends start giggling when I walked past. By now I was getting suspicious. I could hear people whispering about someone getting pregnant, so Parvati went and asked a group of second years who explained that the girl who got knocked up was…

Me.

After that the conversation went as follows:

Me: When did that happen?

Parvati: Why didn't you tell me?

Lavender: Yeah right… you must have got mixed up with someone else.

Second Year: (nervously): Umm… no. It's her. Amanda Thomas told me.

Me: Well it's a load of rubbish. I haven't ever had sex with Harry and I'm not pregnant. If you tell anyone else I'll hex you so bad you won't be able to tell you're face from your bum.

Second Year: Umm… ok. (Walks off)

I know that was mean, but I was really cross. It's unfair; I hate The Hogwart's Grapevine.

It was so embarrassing. I got into The Great Hall and everything went silent. I mean, completely quiet.

Argh! I eventually stormed out, but not before hearing that:

Apparently, I have/am:

Had my baby and am hiding it under my bed. (This is just stupid. Why would I hide a baby under my bed? The closet is a much better place to put one)

Haven't had my baby yet and am casting concealing spells on my stomach. (Possible…)

Going to drop out of school. (Yup. Then I'm going to move into a trailer park and have loads of kids called Billy-Bob-Joe-Hank-Billy-Hank-Bob-Joe)

Have no money. (Actually… That is true. I am skint. I'll have to ask mum for some money)

Have had sex with Harry. (I wish)

Talking about Harry… there is a Quidditch match today. Gryffindor v Slytherin. Oooh, can't wait to see Harry in his full Quidditchy glory. drool

Hermione

Xxxx

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HARRY'S P.O.V.

It's very strange when I enter The Great Hall. Everyone is gathered in clumps and they're whispering furiously. As I sit down I catch a few snippets of their conversation.

"Yeah… shagged our resident bookworm…"

"Didn't know he had it in him"

"She lost hers before mine… That is so unfair"

"Yeah well, at least you're not pregnant like Granger."

Harry reeled in shock. What? Hermione was pregnant?

"Hey mate." Said Ron, plonking down on the bench beside him. "What's wrong? Are you nervous about the Quidditch match? You shouldn't be. You could beat those slimy Slytherins blindfolded."

"No, I'm not nervous about Quidditch…"

"Well, then what?"

"Hermione's pregnant."

Ron spat out the pumpkin juice he'd just been about to drink. "What?!"

"I dunno how. I just came down for breakfast and everyone was talking about it."

"Who with?"

"Dunno." Said Harry glumly.

"Hang on." Ron stood up and walked to the other end of the table and asked a second year girl who had just come in. When Ron bounded up to her, she squeaked and ran off. Shrugging, Ron turned to a first year.

Wide-eyed, Ron quickly sprinted back to his seat. "Mate… why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you what?"

"You mean, you don't know?"

Harry sighed impatiently. "Know what?"

"You, apparently, got Hermione pregnant."

"What the hell…?"

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"Welcome Hogwarts professors and students to the long awaited match between Gryffindor's amazing Quidditch team and Slytherin's abysmal…"

"JORDAN!" McGonagall bellowed.

"Err… Slytherin's team. Right… On the Gryffindor team we have: Co-Captains, and Bludgers...err Beaters Fred and George Weasley. Chasers for Gryffindor are the lovely and talented Alicia Spinnet, Angelina Johnson and the unconquerable Katie Bell..." The cheers and whistles rocked the stadium. "New to the team, and welcome addition is third-year Ben Derson as Keeper. And last, but certainly not least, our very own seeker-extraordinaire , the man who has NEVER missed a snitch. Well, apart from that one time with the dementors and the…"

"Jordan…" growled Professor McGonagall lowly, "You're getting off track."

"Err, rightio Minnie. The one and only HARRY POTTER!!"

The crowd roared.

"And then we have the Slytherin gits…"

"JORDAN!" Goodness, the woman had impeccable timing and volume.

"Team." He amended hastily. "The Slytherin team is as follows, Captain and Chaser Marcus Flint." Music to his ears, short of the small contingent of Slytherins (past and present), most of the stadium roared with resounding 'boos'. "Chasers Denis Warrington, Christoph Montague. In the position of Beaters, though they're bloody Bludgers on their own, Shane Bole and Paul Derrick. Incompetent Keeper Bletchly will mind the goals, and playing Seeker since he bought his way onto the team..."

"JORDAN! STOP THAT RIGHT..."

"Draco Malfoy and his shiny Nimbus 2003 collection, sported by all his lovely well-purchased team members...."

"JORDAN, IF YOU DON'T STOP RIGHT THIS INSTANT!"

"Sorry Professor, my house loyalty got in my way." He apologized. "Now on Professor Dumbledore's (who, incidently, is not here today) orders. Please stand for the Wizarding National Anthem. Those of you who are confused as to why we are doing this, it is Remembrance Saturday today, a time in which we remember those who died fighting You-Know-Who and sing for the freedom they gave us. Right, off we go."

Then, and only then, did the greatest known tragedy of what it meant to be a wizard begin.

The slaughter of music was profound. Caterwauling in the extreme, and Lee Jordan, despite his love of the game of Quidditch, his role of commentator and the wizarding world he lived in, had to shudder.

At last the murder of the song stopped. "Right. Lovely folks... just lovely. I'm sure they're very grateful. Well, with all the preambles out of the way... let's play QUIDDITCH!"

Again, the crowds roared their approval. A flurry of action hit the field as the Slytherin team burst from their locker room... their green and silver uniforms a sharp contrast to the blue sky and fluffy white clouds. "And... out first, the Slytherins... FLINT, WARRINGTON, MONTAGUE, BOLE, DERRICK, BLETCHLY and... MALFOY!"

"Annnnddd, the obvious winners of this match, the Gryffindor Quidditch team!"

"Jordan. I've warned you. One more word and you'll be banned from all future matches. All future Hogsmeade trips and…"

Madam Hooch fortunately took this opportunity to signal both teams from the centre of the field. Clearly, her voice amplified by charm, she opened the game in her usual style. "I want a nice fair game, all of you." She insisted, glaring fiercely at the captains (and co-captains) of both teams.

"The players assume position, in preparation for the release of the Quaffle. Madam Hooch raises her whistle and… the Quaffle is released. Katie Bell passes to Angelina who shoots down the pitch and… 10 POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR."

Flint has got the Quaffle and passes to Warrington… who drops it! Johnson takes possession of the Quaffle, passes long back to Alicia and...... SCORE! 10 points for Gryffindor! Slytherin takes possession. Chaser Montague ducks one Bludger and dives to evade Spinnet. Speeding toward the goals, his own teammates Bole and Derrick keep aiming Bludgers to keep Gryffindor chasers clear. Oh-ho... he shoots... Derson dives and blocks the score. Ten-nothing, Gryffindor! Bole chucks his bat at Potter who dives out the way. Free pass to Bell.

Katie Bell passes to Spinnet who passes back to Bell who is intercepted by Montague. He shoots, he scores. The score is ten-ten."

The game continued for almost half an hour before "POTTER HAS SPOTTED THE SNITCH. HE DIVES, MALFOY ON HIS TAIL… A superb bit of flying there… Potter shoots up and… HE'S GOT THE SNITCH. GRYFFINDOR WIN! AND… FOUUULLLL!"

In fury, Shane Bole had chucked his beaters bat with all his might. The bat sailed through the air before hitting Harry on the head with a resounding thwack. He dropped from his broom, his body arching before BANG. He hit the ground.

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Numb with shock, the Quidditch fans left the stands, craning their necks to see the floating body of Harry Potter. Thoughts flurried through Hermione's mind as she slowly trudged up towards the castle.

"Did you… did you see… I'll be surprised if Bole isn't expelled because of this." Said Parvati.

Hermione nodded glumly.

Holding the door open for Hermione, Parvati and Lavender gently led her to their common room.

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"Students. As I'm sure you are aware, one of your fellow students was injured during a Quidditch match. Mr Harry Potter is currently in the Hospital Wing, in a coma. We're not sure when he'll wake up."

The room filled with gasps and whispers. Dumbledore held up his hands for silence.

"Now, on a brighter note, I have delayed your dinner for too long … eat up."

Food suddenly appeared on the table and the room once again filled with chatter.

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As the clock struck midnight, a lone figure crept down the winding corridors. Her bare feet pattered on the stone floor. Clutched in their hand was a small envelope and a tiny parcel. Opening the Hospital Wing door, they snuck in and tip-toed to the bed by the window. Lying on that bed was a dark-haired figure. With a whispered goodnight, the card and parcel was placed on the bed. Taking a last look at the still body, Hermione walked out of the door.

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Hermione sat quietly in her Dorm room, half-listening to the excited chatter of Parvati and Lavender next to her.

"Yeah, apparently, Harry's got so many gifts and cards and stuff that he has FOUR whole tables filled with them. Bet most of it is chocolate and sweets"

"Cool. I'd love to eat that much sweet stuff in one go."

"Yeah but you can't because you're watching your figure." Said Lavender

"So? I could still eat that much chocolate. I'd just have to work out a bit." Argued Parvati.

"A bit? Girl, you'd have to be exercising permanently and judging by your un-enthusiasm for sport, I doubt that would happen."

"Excuse me, I could so exercise all the time if I wanted to."

"Could not."

"Could too."

"Could not."

"Could too."

"Could not."

"Could too."

"Could too."

"Could n… I hate you."

"Oh you know you love me."

Parvati refused to reply.

"Come on Parvati, why are you being so… eek!" shrieked Lavender as she was suddenly pushed off the sofa.

Hermione and Parvati sniggered as a disgruntled Lavender poked her head up from the ground. "Not funny."

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"You know…" mumbled Hermione as she munched her way through a bowl of muesli. "This stuff isn't that bad."

"Hurrah!" whooped Lavender, raising her hands to the air. "We've converted her!"

Hermione raised her eyebrows. "Anywaaay… What shall we do about Saturday night?"

"Well… I was thinking we could…" started Parvati but before she could finish, the bell rang for first lessons.

"Eurgh." Groaned Lavender. "History of Magic."

"Eurgh." Said Hermione. "Scrubbing bedpans."

"Again?" said Parvati. "They must be scrubbed every day!"

"Yeah I know. It's a load of rubbish. Just because of that little incident in History of Magic…"

Both Parvati and Lavender were staring at her in horror and making odd faces to get her attention.

"Hermione…" hissed Lavender.

But Hermione was in full rant mode; which meant nothing could stop her, except…

"Ah. Miss Granger. I was wondering if I could have a word."

Her mouth dropped and she turned slowly towards the twinkling eyes of Professor Dumbledore.

"Miss Patil, Brown. Am I right in saying you have a class to attend?"

With two mumbled words of "Of course sir" they hurriedly walked out the room.

"Right, Miss Granger. If you would kindly follow me."

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Hermione's P.OV.

Oh God. Oh God. Oh God. Oh God. I'm in Professor Dumbledore's office! Alone, without Harry or Ron, ALONE!

And he's sat across from me, arching his fingers and looking at me. Oh God. Oh God.

He's rocking back in his chair and still staring at me with those damn twinkly eyes. STOP TWINKLING. ARRGGGH. DAMN IT. STOP IT!

Ok. He's talking now. "Miss Granger, I couldn't help but hear something that is going round the school at the moment. Do you know what it is?"

"Yes sir." I mumble. "But I'm not pregnant, honest! I swear on my life. Me and Harry aren't even talking anymore! Though I wish we were because I really, really like him. I possibly even love him. I couldn't be pregnant though. I haven't even had my first kiss, let alone had sex with Harry (though I wish I could) and… and,"

I peter off when Dumbledore holds up his hand for silence. He furrows his brow in confusion. (WOW! I made Dumbledore confused. I should get a prize for that!)

"Miss Granger, I was merely talking about your ambition to become a teacher. I was wondering if you wanted to tutor some students."

Oh. God.

I just told Professor Dumbledore that I loved Harry.

I just told Dumbledore that I wanted to have sex with Harry.

I just told Dumbledore that I wanted to have sex with his favourite student.

Please just kill me now.

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Authors Notes.

Again, sorry it took so long to come out. It was quite hard to write because I had really bad writers block. Anyhoo, just wanted to say a HUGE thank you to everyone who reviewed.

(28 days till Christmas!)

PassionFlower

xxxx