MysticalDreamer: Haha Thanksgiving... oops. I'm a few months late. Stupid writer's block. And school. Yes. I blame much of it on school. And what seems to be my inability to login here...

disclaimer: Don't own it. But I do own and love my Sesshomaru plushie!

chapter five

Inuyasha's ears perked up. He sniffed the air and leaned over the well. His eyes widened. "Blood?" he asked.

Miroku and Sango raised an eyebrow and looked down in the well, too.

"What are you talking about?" asked Sango.

Shippo hopped up on the edge and looked up warily. He blinked when he saw nothing, and looked back and forth between Inuyasha, Sango, Miroku and the bottom of the well. "Inuyasha?" he squeaked.

"Dammit!" he shouted, leaping into the well and jumping into the future, leaving behind a very confused monk, slayer and kitsune.

He tore through time and nearly broke down the door as he exited the shrine that held the well.

Kagome stared at her wrist as the blood flowed out. She started to cry again although she didn't realize it. Drops of crimson liquid hit the ground, splattering in random directions. She sank to her knees and watched it ooze out.

She heard thudding and glanced behind her, only to see the locked door fly open, falling off its hinges. Her eyes widened when she saw Inuyasha standing there, his eyes wide with worry and short of breath. His eyes got even larger when he saw her sitting on the ground, bleeding to death. "Kagome!" he said, his voice revealing his fear.

She could only smile weakly at him. "I'm so sorry..." she whispered. The loss of blood was beginning to get to her as she grew dizzy and nearly fell over.

Inuyasha caught her and grabbed her wrist, ripping off the sleeve of his haori. Before he could wrap it around her, she hit his arm with a strong enough force to send the sleeve flying.

"Stop it, Inuyasha!" she snapped, her tears flowing faster.

He grew angry now and pulled her wrist to his mouth, stopping the blood. His mouth was soon filled with a rusty, copper sort of taste, but he didn't stop.

"What are you doing...?" she whispered, exasperated.

He gave her a look and she started to cry harder, knowing that she was crying now. She looked at her wrist to see a blood stained arm. His mouth had traces of her blood as well, and even now he refused to move his mouth.

She clutched his chest with her other arm and buried her face in his shirt. He reached around for his torn sleeve and grabbed it. Before she could stop him again, he quickly switched from his mouth to the cloth, wrapping her wrist tightly. He then cradled her arm in his own, closing his eyes.

For a while, they just sat there in silence. Kagome's tears muffled by his haori, his breathing slowly relaxing.

The shower was still running and it continued to fog up the room. The blood on the tiles started to dry and the blade Kagome had used lay forgotten on the floor. She felt weak from the blood loss and could barely move. The hanyou had a protective arm around her back and he wasn't letting go anytime soon.

Time passed and Inuyasha lightly touched her chin, pulling her face to meet his own. She stared at him with tear stained, blood-shot, empty eyes.

"What the hell is the matter with you?" he asked in a low and dangerous voice.

She couldn't reply. She just stared at him as endless tears escaped her eyes. He sighed and pushed her head back into his chest. Without thinking, he started to stroke her hair. He glanced around the room and caught sight of the mirror. He looked closer when he saw something was written. Luckily, it was written in a kanji that he could actually read. His mouth nearly fell open after he finished.

Haunted
I tried to kill my pain but only brought more
I lay dying and I am pouring crimson regret
I'm dying, praying, bleeding and screaming
Am I too lost to be saved?
Holding my last breath safe inside myself
Are all my thoughts of you
Sweet raptured light
It ends here TONIGHT

He stared at the words and looked to Kagome. As much as she talked to him about everything, he had a funny feeling there was so much more. He pulled her closer.

"Kagome..." he whispered gently into her hair.

"Please... don't say anything. Don't."

He sighed but remained silent. Always the last to admit his fears and he was damn well scared. He continued to stroke her hair as she cried.

"Why are you here..." she asked, in such a low voice that had Inuyasha been a human, he wouldn't have heard it.

"What did you do?"

"I asked you not to say anything!" she shouted at him, voice quivering with tears. She lightly punched his chest with her undamaged arm.

"I'm not listening to you this time," he said, forcing her to look up at him. "What the hell made you do this?"

"Don't ask me this!" she wailed, trying to look away.

"Kagome, dammit, look at me!" he shouted.

She looked at his eyes and saw something she had never seen. A glint, a twist in his pupil. The way his eyebrows furrowed. Anger and fear.

She burst into harder tears and buried her head in his chest again.

"Kagome!" he snapped, grabbing her head with both of his hands and pulling her face so it was looking right at him. "I can't help you if you won't tell me! Goddammit, I know what happened! While I don't know what it feels like, I can see it in you! Do you think I'm a blind bastard?" he said angrily.

"I said I don't wanna talk about it!" she shouted.

"I don't fucking care!" he shouted louder than before.

She stared at him with amazed eyes. She had definitely never seen this side of him before. He had the mouth of a sailor, that she already knew, but he never swore with that sort of intonation.

"Listen to me Kagome," he said, staring into her empty eyes. "For the past few days I've done everything I could to help you. You talked, I listened. You keep saying everything is fine and that you'll be fine."

He looked to her wrist and gently picked it up, showing it to her. "But I can see you're not," he said.

"You don't know-"

"Stop it!" he interrupted, letting her wrist fall. "I don't know what you're going through, okay? I don't freak'n know! But I am here for you! Can't you see that?"

"Why can't you see, Inuyasha?" she shouted. She jumped out of his arms and cradled her wrist. "It won't stop! I keep seeing it over and over! Everywhere! No matter what I do, there he is! Mocking me!"

Tears escaped her eyes in an endless waterfall as Inuyasha climbed to his feet as well and reached out to hold her. She pushed his hand away angrily.

"You say this and that," she said, her eyes closing partway. "But you don't see it. You don't see his face in that sinister twist, smiling so horribly at me." She hugged herself tightly and shuddered. "You weren't there! You didn't see him! He was enjoying it!"

She grew silent as she looked back up at Inuyasha, a hopeless expression in her eyes, in her face. "It was like he planned it ..."

Inuyasha's face grew grim. "You're right," he said.

She looked up at him curiously through glossy eyes.

"I didn't see him," he said in a calm voice. "But he's a lucky bastard that I didn't, or he'd be a dead bastard right now. I didn't see it Kagome, because if I had, I would have tore the monster to pieces before he got close to you."

Her mouth quivered. "I don't... I don't want to be here..." she whispered. "I can't stand it! Everyone's so happy-peppy-la la la! And I have to be just like them! If not, they'll be suspicious. I have to force it down, keep it in and smile!"

"No you don't!" he shouted, putting his hands on her shoulders. "You don't have to keep everything so bottled up! That's what got you here!"

"Damn right that's what got me here!" she shouted back at him. "I can't deal with it! I see it again and again and then everyone is all happy! It's like they know but they don't care! I have to smile! I have to! I have to!"

She looked at her wrist. Inuyasha grabbed it and pulled it close to him, pulling her closer as well. She looked at him curiously.

"It's because of that I almost lost you," he said softly.

"What?"

"I told you again and again," he said, "I am here with you. Didn't you hear me?"

"Of course I heard you-"

"Then why this?" he demanded, shoving her wrist into her face. She stared at it incredulously. She couldn't answer. "Are you so blinded by your pain that you can't see mine?"

She looked into his eyes and suddenly knew exactly what she had seen in his eyes. Her eyes regained some emotion and tears spilled out once more.

"I respected your choice to remain silent about this," he said, wrapping his arms around her. "I did what seemed to be the best. But if what I've been doin' led to this, then I did something wrong. Tell me, Kagome. What the hell did I do wrong?"

She clutched the top of his haori. "I... You..."

"Well?"

"It's..."

"It's what?"

"I don't know why I get up in the morning," she whispered fast, "If all I'm going to see is his face over and over..."

"You get up because you can," he said, looking her straight in the eye. "You aren't some weak little mortal, I know that by now. You're stronger than that!"

She blinked once and water squeezed out of her eyes and rolled down her cheeks. She stared into his amber eyes, which held that precious emotion she thought he lacked.

"And if you really felt like that," he snapped, motioning to the mirror with his head, "Why the hell didn't you tell me? I said I was here for you and I meant it! Dammit, Kagome, I meant it!"

She wailed into him. "Inuyasha, Inuyasha..." she repeated softly, over and over. He placed a hand on her head as she continued to say his name. "I'm sorry... I'm so sorry..."

The words on the mirror had begun to re-fog back up, making her message vanish. Her tears continued softly as they sank to the tiled floor in a heap of embrace.

"Tell me anything. Tell me everything," said Inuyasha gently, stroking her hair again. "Scream it. Shout it. Let it out."

Her grip on him tightened. He noticed this and rested his chin on the top of her head softly. He felt her tears slowly seep through his haori, just like they had on the night he had found her - battered and unstable. He tightened his arms slightly as well.

Kagome fidgeted a bit and looked up at him. He looked at her curiously, wondering what she was going to say, if she was going to say anything.

"I really will be stronger now," she whispered. "I'm... I'm not going to take the coward's way out."

"That's the Kagome I know," he smiled.

Her lip twitched, but she couldn't smile back. "I can't smile," she said. "I won't smile. I'm not going to until I'm okay again."

"Then that will be our goal," said Inuyasha, "To get you smiling again."

"Sounds like a plan," she said. "I'll do my best."

He smiled again and pushed his forehead to hers. "She really is back," he said. "The Kagome I knew... the Kagome I love."

Her eyes widened at his words, unsure if she had heard him correctly. She blinked once and stared at him.

It was two seconds later that he leaned in closer and captured her lips with his own. She was startled by his sudden action, but soon relaxed in his arms and returned the kiss.

His lips felt so warm compared to the ice cold skin of Naraku. She felt like she might melt a bit in his arms. She hadn't felt so warm in days.

He pulled away a few seconds later, but kept his face close to hers. "Now promise me," he said, cupping her cheek with his hand, "Promise me you won't pull anymore crazy stunts like this."

"I promise," she said, snuggling up close to him. He wrapped his arms around her again and she was enveloped in warmth.

"Good..." he whispered.

XD XD XD XD

When Kagome was able to stand again, and with stability, she realized her bathroom was a Class A disaster zone. It was a heaping mess of broken doors and blood stained tiles. If anyone found the room in such way, it was raise many questions - questions Kagome did not want to answer.

And so, she and Inuyasha set out to clean it up. With some help, she managed to get some water onto the tiles and swish away the dried blood. She watched it flow down the drain and felt a sense of relief overcome her. If Inuyasha hadn't come when he had... she might not even be watching this scene right now. She wouldn't exist anymore.

She grabbed his arm without thinking and pulled it close to her tightly. "Thank you... Inuyasha..." she whispered, in a barely audible voice. He picked it up, however, and smiled faintly.

They managed to clean up the whole bathroom after a while, except for one tiny thing. The door.

It remained destroyed and off its hinges, lying on the ground with a slight dent. How Inuyasha had been able to break through without splitting it in half was a mystery. It was out of Kagome's mind, though, as she needed to come up with a replacement door and fast. She knew her mother wouldn't back down until she was told what had really happened. And Kagome wasn't ready to tell yet.

"What should we do about that?" she asked, turning to face the door. She pointed at it and looked at Inuyasha.

He cringed. "Yeah, sorry about that..." he grumbled. "I wasn't really thinking about inanimate objects at the time, ya know..."

"I know, I know," she mumbled. "But it doesn't change the fact that we have to do something about it. Quickly, too. I have no idea when my mother will get home."

Inuyasha sighed and seemed to be deep in thought. "You could always say... I did it," he muttered.

She looked at him with a curious spark in her eyes. "What?"

"I heard a scream and came flying in without thinking," he replied, crossing his arms. "Only to find you had just slipped on some wet tiles."

Kagome put a finger to her chin and thought for a second. "That might actually work," she said. "My mom loves you, although I can't figure out why, so she'll just be happy to see you cared so much and then wander off and talk about getting a new door. I can offer to pay for half of it."

He nodded. "See? Problem solved," he said. He took her hand. "Now what do you say we get this properly bandaged... and get you some new clothes."

She looked down at herself to find her left sleeve blood stained, as well as parts of her skirt, although not as visible because it was black. She would have laughed nervously, had she been able too.

"I guess I do," she said. She dug around in the cabinets and pulled out a bandage, but froze. "Inuyasha... I need to go to the hospital..."

"What? What's that? Is it bad?"

She shook her head. "A hospital is a place where there are many doctors and they all treat sick and injured people..." She stole a glance at her wrist, and then looked away. "If I don't get this properly treated..." her voice trailed off.

Inuyasha contemplated this for a bit. "But won't they find out what you did?" he asked.

Kagome sighed. "I can just say I sliced it on some broken glass..."

"I don't know..."

He snatched the bandage from Kagome's hand and looked at it. She watched him curiously, wondering what he'd do. "Couldn't we just... go back to my time and fix it up?"

"Why?"

He pulled her wrist closer and his eyes narrowed. "I don't want you out of my sight again," he muttered.

She would have smiled at his words, if possible. She hugged his arm lightly and walked closer to the door. "I guess we should bring it outside or something. I don't wanna leave it in the middle of the bathroom," she said.

Inuyasha appeared at her side and lifted the door with ease. "Where to?" he asked. She motioned for him to follow her and headed downstairs. She directed him to put it, gently, in the corner of the living room.

"That should do it," she said, admiring their work.

"Go change," he said suddenly, crossing his arms. His hands were hidden in the sleeves of his haori.

"Ah," she said. She took another quick look at herself and shook her head. "Yeah, I'll go do that..." she mumbled, speed walking towards her room.

Inuyasha listened carefully as her footsteps echoed through the house. He could tell she was scrambling around in her room, so he plopped down on that 'so-fah' thing. He sat crossed legged with his arms across his chest. His eyes remained open for a while, but they closed eventually out of boredom.

"Sorry it took so long..."

He opened an eye to glance at her.

She had thrown on loose jeans and a dark teeshirt, with a black zip up sweatshirt overtop. It was a bit baggy and hid her sliced wrist, which had been bandaged in an actually gauze earlier. She carried nothing in her arms, and stuck her hands behind her back as she said, "Let's go back now... to the Sengoku-jidai..."

He gave off a faint smile. "Sounds good," he replied.

"I have to come back later... to explain the door to my mom," she said, tilting her head in the battered door's direction. "I'll leave a note for now, but it would be best if it actually came out of my mouth."

"Whatever you want," he said.

She faked a gasp. "Inuyasha? Are you willingly allowing me to come back to my own era?"

"Don't push it. C'mon, let's get a move on," he said, shaking his head as he leaped to his feet. It was at times like this when Kagome would have smiled... had she been capable of doing so. She followed behind him in silence as he led the way to the well.

Inuyasha pushed open the shoji doors of the shrine. He hopped to the ground near the well and glanced back up at Kagome as she walked down the stairs. "Something's on your mind," he noted, watching her face.

"I think... Do you think... Should Sango and Miroku know...?"

"That's your decision, not mine," he replied as she reached the bottom of the stairs and stood next to him. "As long as it doesn't result in something dangerous again..."

"Inuyasha..." she warned. He grinned weakly. "I just... I don't know. They're going to want to know what happened when Kaede-sama treats my wrist. I just don't feel like I should be lying to them about this..."

"As I said before," he said, pressing his forehead to hers. "When you're ready to talk, I'll be there for you. And you know they'll listen. It's up to you."

Now would have been a moment of grinning, but her face was incapable of contorting as such. "I know..." she replied. She closed her eyes. "Not yet..."

"Hm?"

"I don't ... I can't, is more like it..." she explained. "I can't talk about it yet. I will, though. They deserve to know. I ... I just can't tell them yet..."

He nodded. "My lips are sealed," he promised. He smiled as he lifted her in his arms and jumped into the well. They crossed through time without a word and arrived in the Sengoku jidai effortlessly.

Their appearance caused Sango, Miroku and Shippo to jump in shock. All three held worried looks on their faces. Sango and Shippo rushed over to them as Inuyasha set Kagome to her feet.

"Kagome-chan! Are you all right?" questioned Sango, grabbing her friend by the shoulders. "Inuyasha just rushed off-"

"It's okay, Sango-chan, everyone," she replied, pushing off the older girl's hands. She grabbed her damaged wrist without thinking. "I've been acting weird lately..."

Shippo hopped on her shoulder and stared at her with worry. "Is something wrong?" he asked, desperately hoping there wasn't.

She didn't smile in a comforting way, as she normally would. This unsettled Shippo. The kitsune clung to her tightly. "Something..." she started. She didn't know what to say.

Inuyasha grabbed her hand softly. That was all she needed.

"Something happened," she said, eyes downcast. "I... I'm going to tell you all, but at the moment... I just can't do it."

"Kagome-sama?" asked Miroku. His arms were crossed across his chest as a confused and concerned expression appeared on his face.

Another smile would have come around now. "You have my word," she went on, "I am going to tell this. I swear."

Sango wrapped her arms around her. "It's all right, Kagome," she said gently. "I understand. I'm here. Always."

Kagome nearly cried, especially when Miroku lightly placed a hand comfortingly on her shoulder. She wrapped her free hand around Sango's back. "Thank you..." she whispered.

Inuyasha tugged on her hand. He gave a glance and she knew instantly what he meant. She pulled out of the embrace, stealing a look at her wrist. She was starting to feel a bit light headed. She needed this to be treated.

She held up her wrist. "I need to heal this," she said, staring blankly ahead at no one in particular. She scanned the three of them quickly before walking towards the village, pulling along Inuyasha by the hand.

Kagome pulled back the door to Kaede's hut. "Kaede-sama?" she asked.

The elder priestess looked up. "Oh? Kagome? Is something wrong, child?" she asked, getting to her feet from her kneeling position.

Inuyasha entered the hut as well. Kagome held out her wrist. "Could you... treat this? As best you can?" she asked.

Kaede looked confused, but walked over. She took the girl's hand gently and looked it over. "May I remove the bandage?" she asked.

Kagome nodded. "It may start bleeding again," she told her. "So you may want to get the healing herbs and such needed first."

The Priestess let go of her wrist and nodded. She mingled around her hut and dug around, pulling out random things here and there. Kagome sat on the ground as Sango and Miroku entered the hut. They stood off to the side to avoid interfering.

Inuyasha sat beside her as she slowly unraveled the makeshift bandage from her wrist. The bloody gauze fluttered to the ground as she stared at the slice in her wrist. It had not healed, although it was no longer bleeding as badly as it had been. Kaede muttered an "oh my" before getting straight to work.

In time, Kagome's wrist had a proper wrap up with old era anti-biotics inside to heal it. She clutched it to her chest tightly, shutting her eyes. Inuyasha put his hand on hers gently. She opened her eyes and looked at him.

It would have been the perfect time to smile.

XD XD XD XD XD

MD: Nya. I end it there. Things may seem slow now, but it's just getting started. I'm hoping to get the next chapter out quicker than this one, but we'll see if that happens.

Thanks to all my lovely reviewers, who I love much! And a quick question: Should I increase the rating because of InuYasha's potty mouth? X3

Oh, Kagome's suicide note is random lyrics from various Evanescene songs. I take no credit for them at all. Hmm... does this mean that Evanescence can be taken as somewhat suicidal? >.>Then again, it could just be me and my twisted view upon things.