Author's Notes: I'm going to try to go along with the characters' personalities as much as possible. Such as Relena's personality, at the beginning of the anime, I noticed that though she is pretty mature, she still can be teenagerish in some ways, so in my beginning chapters, she won't be quite so grown up and adult like. Another thing I noticed is that she likes touching windows and looking out of them.....weird huh? Anywho, I'm still trying to figure out how to upload my chapters as a web page and not have the funny symbols come out, so if this chapter looks weird, a big sorry. I'll try to make the chapters longer as the story goes along.

Whispers of a Distant Star Chapter 1: Loving Matrimony

~I can't be sad for the rest of my life, let's try to be stronger-Relena Peacecraft

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My fingers grazed the spotless window; it's clear features showing another pristine day. It was my daily ritual, to peer out of this piece of glass every morning and contemplate on how I was going to get through the day. My eyes are caught by the sparkle on my left ring finger and I raise my hands to stare, not admire, the band of silver with a sapphire being hugged by two clear diamonds. And I can feel the emptiness convulse inside. It eats me up sometimes. I can feel it gnawing at my heart, struggling to work its way into my core. I never wanted to get married. And to marry a speechless stranger did nothing to improve the already pitiful conditions of my life. I wanted love, I got indifference. I wanted peace, I got an arranged marriage. I wanted happiness, I got a tear soaked pillow. You would think that after years of being a foreign ambassador, that I would eventually learn that it wasn't my wants that would be achieved, but others. Yet, stupidly, I want to keep believing that one day I'll be able to receive at least one of my desires. Stupid, yeah, that's me. Stupid for signing my name on the marriage papers, thus becoming not only the youngest ambassador but the youngest married ambassador. And father wasn't even able to come to the wedding. In the reflection from the glass, I'm caught up with the memories of being tossed in the air as a young girl while my father's laugh tugged giggles out of me.

I was a little girl once, not too long ago. I had the same dreams too, as normal girls. I wanted to marry, have kids, a white picket fence, the whole nine yards. But above all, I wanted my prince on a white horse. The one I could lean on for support instead of stuffing all failures and sadness inside me, letting it consume me from inside to out. He would be not only my pillar of strength but also a giver of unconditional love. I would never have to fear loneliness or sorrow because he would always be there, grasping my hand in a tight hold. They are past wishes but I still can't forget the beauty of the possibilities that could have been.

After heaving a quiet sigh, I rebuild the mental walls in my face and prepared to greet another day of loving matrimony. My bedroom is two doors down from his, and yes, we do sleep in separate rooms. I don't even want to think of consummating the marriage, though I'm sure he would never stoop low enough to commit such an act. Especially with a woman he has not even traded more than a sentence to. It had already been a month since the ceremony. There was no wedding reception, no honeymoon. A limo took us straight to the house and so we have passed these past few weeks, a politeness that blanketed everything in a stuffy atmosphere. The only thing I could remember from my wedding day was the beauty of that church, the enormous windows that shone in comforting warmth, and the stark fear of inevitability.

He was in the kitchen, carefully reading a book from our library with a cup of coffee in mid air. He had gracefully reclined in the stiff backed chairs we had, his eyes gravely concentrating on whatever he was reading. He didn't even look up when I walked in and I tried to keep my glance away from his still form.

"Good morning." I said cheerfully, forcing myself to smile. I thought of all the paperwork I had to do for work and my smile faltered. "How was your sleep?"

It was the same questions I had asked the day before that, and the day before that. And I silently listened for the answer I had grown accustomed to hearing.

"Hn."

Well, that's great, I'm glad to hear you're doing so well, I thought snidely. I mentally smacked myself in the head as I sat down. What a way to go about in a marriage. For a few minutes we both sat, him reading and me blankly staring at the wide window letting in streams of warm sunlight. The cream colored curtains had been pulled back by Pagen earlier so that the dining room positively glowed with light. A friendly breeze brought in the pine scent of the trees surrounding the house.

"Will you be leaving for work soon?" I asked out of a habit of sheer politeness. Yet, the question sounded stupid even to my own ears. Sometimes, this insufferable man was no better than the aged conservative men I had meetings with. The least he could do was somehow attempt to say something more meaningful than a hn.

"Hn."

I fought down a rising sigh and picked up my briefcase to get ready to leave. Why did I keep doing this every morning? I come down, ask a few questions, hope for an answer, and received nothing but that monotonous hn that ravaged my cultivated patience. This time a sigh did come out and I pursed my lips.

"I'll see you tonight then.....goodbye."

My fingers gripped tightly gripped the suitcase while I pushed away the temptation to fling my marriage ring at his head. Heero Yuy, why did it have to be you?

"Why did it have to be him?" I thought aloud as the limo sped along a highway to my office.

"Marriage still not going good kiddo?" Duo Maxwell asked from his seat up front. He turned his body slightly around so that he could look at me. His long chestnut brown hair was braided as usual and was draped over his shoulder. His face betrayed nothing but an impassive face waiting to hear the aftermath. I tried to give a brave grin but his lips tipped down into a frown.

"Maybe I should slip some kind of drug into his drink...." He said thoughtfully, his violet eyes twinkled mischievously and I could no more think of Heero Yuy drugged than him actually smiling voluntarily.

"Very funny Duo." I said dryly. "I doubt that would work." Though, perhaps if there was a drug that could make Heero a little friendly...

"I wish I could say sorry, but I know that's not going to do anything." He admitted honestly and I had to give a smile for his effort.

"Me too."

*~*~*~*~*

The house was dark when the limo driver opened my door. Duo was already outside, his ears attentively listening for anything deceptively out of place.

"Is he even home?" He pointed to the dark house with a thumb. I shook my head as I unbuttoned my silk jacket.

"No, he's home alright, he's probably locked himself away in either his bedroom or the library." I said bitterly and bit my lip at my tone. "Sorry."

"Nothing to be sorry about babe, I'll see you in, in case some extreme terrorist managed to get into the house." Duo said sunnily. "And maybe I want to say hi to your infamous husband."

The door smoothly opened and the entrance light turned on as its sensors detected our presence. I didn't bother to call out a 'I'm home' knowing that nobody but the quietness would greet me back. After carelessly dropping my briefcase, I led Duo to the kitchen where a hot pot of coffee was always ready. We were sitting down when Duo looked at me across the delicate glass table with a knowing look in his good-humored eyes. He flung his chestnut braid behind his back and took up his coffee.

"W-what?" I asked.

"You're not happy." He said plainly and took a cautious sip of his hot drink.

"I thought you already knew that." I pointed out.

"No, you were unhappy before, but you're unhappier now. What's really bugging you babe?" He looked at me fumbling with my fingers.

"Don't worry about it, it's nothing I can't handle. Besides," I looked up at him and constructed my best innocent face. "If I can tackle a conference room of angry diplomats, I think I can handle an irrelevant problem such as this." To top this beautiful lie, I added in my dazzling smile, one I reserved for the most troublesome predicaments.

"I'm counting to three." I gulped as he slowly ticked off the numbers in his head. He had never failed to use this technique on me in the past six years he had protected me and fear clutched my stomach.

"Come on Duo, let's be reasonable. We're grown and mature adults here, I'm sure we can find a more suitable..er...more suitable method than that." I said in my most soothing voice while putting up my hands. He stood up and reached over the small table with his long torso, fingers reaching out toward me. Oh god, he was going to tickle me. I closed my eyes and gave a squeak when suddenly something whooshed past me, creating a large crash. My eyes flew open to see Duo put in a tight headlock by...Heero?

"What the hell are you doing in my house?" He said calmly but a threat was issued in his tone.

"What are you doing?!!" I yelled as I rushed over to pry Heero's strong fingers from Duo's purple face. "He's my friend!!" Heero let go and Duo sucked in oxygen and coughed it back up. He was muttering something but I couldn't hear him and I moved my ear closer.

"What?" I asked.

"I said, I was only listening to her talk her heart out." Duo coughed out as his face returned to its normal hue. I sat back on my heels in relief.

"I was not." I defended and shot a warning glare at Duo. He only shrugged his shoulders and rubbed his neck.

"Who says I can't predict the future?" Duo looked up at my husband who was nonchalantly looking at him with the same expression on his face. "So you must be Heero...you know, I swear we've met before."

"Hn. What are you doing here?" His subtle voice crept out.

"Damn, don't you know anything about Relena? I've been her bodyguard since she was in elementary school." Duo stood up and straightened his disheveled clothes. "You know, I think I might remember where I've seen you now, were you a part of that proj-"Heero's hand latched onto Duo's shirt.

"We have a civilian within hearing distance." He hissed into Duo's surprised face.

"I'm not a civilian and don't treat me like some child." I remarked indignantly. He only gave me an impatient look and I could feel steam coming out of my ears. I was 17, not 4! And what secrets was he keeping from me???

"If you don't want me around, why not try asking me to leave." I retorted and walked away in stiff and angry movements. Divorce had never sounded more tempting. If I wasn't some inanimate object in the house to be ignored, I was a naughty child that wasn't allowed to speak in front of her elders. Once I reached my suite of rooms, I gently closed the doors and furiously threw my jacket at the bed. It hit the handcrafted headboard with a muffled thunk. I could only envision Heero's face jeering down on me with contempt. If he didn't love me, why did he even marry me? I threw myself at the bed and laid on my back, blankly looking up at the peach wallpaper. Duo was right, I was unhappy. Deep down, I knew that by marrying Heero and creating a strong alliance with the colonies would benefit what my father was trying to pursue, a peace between earth and the colonies.

Heero Yuy. The only thing I knew about him was that the colonies had opted for him to be the one to secure the friendship with earth. Even my brother hadn't told me Heero's history, only informing him that he was "honorable", whatever he meant by that. One marriage for the benefit for billions. What was one person's unhappiness compared to the despair of the billions in space and earth? I dug the palms of my hands into my eyes to stop the tears coming forth. A sniffle escape and I reined my sadness with iron will till all feeling of crying went away. I won't give up, maybe, if I keep trying, we could at least be friends instead of strangers. I wouldn't be able to live at all if the rest of my years were going to be like this every single day.

Suddenly, my arms and legs felt weak and I slowly reached over to pick up my jacket, which had fallen to the ground.

"It's all for you father, all for you." I muttered out loud and popped my uncomfortable heels off. "Ambassador at 16, married at 17, how did my life ever get like this?"

Wonderful, Heero has pushed me so far that I'm talking to myself. I was that starved for human interaction. My fingers twitched to throw something else but I took a deep breath and blamed my tenseness to exhaustion. The phone rang and I gave a groan as my feet dutifully took me to the ringing machine.

"It better not be the office." I said out loud again. "Hello, Peacecraft residence."

"It's your father." A voice rushed and terrified, it was father's secretary.

"My father? Is something wrong?" I said, my heart stopped beating and my temperature dropped as I could feel my face pale at the words. "Where?" I breathed out in complete fear,

"The Alliance main headquarters' building."

"I'll be there in a few minutes." I hung up the phone before the man could answer back and sprinted down the stairs, three at a time.

"Duo!!! Pagen, the car!"

Duo stuck his head out of the kitchen doorway and was at my side the second he saw my stricken face.

"What happened?" He asked as we both hurried outside to wait for the limo.

"My father, something happened. His secretary called and-and-I know something bad happened to him, I can feel it." The limo arrived and I flung myself into the car, telling the driver to step on it. The other door opened as well and to my surprise, Heero sat down in the seat next to me, his body warily distanced from mine.

"Calm down and take a breather. We'll see what the situation is when we get there." Duo placed his hands on my shoulders as I tried to stop my hyperventilated breathing. Heero grabbed a small laptop behind the seat and began to furiously type on it.

"A bomb." He said shortly after. "In a meeting room your father was in."

I could feel my blood freeze and a thousand scenarios ran through my head. Images of my father trapped beneath debris, my father blown to a million pieces, my father suffocated to death from the smoke, my father....dead. The silence in the car was so deafening that I could feel my ragged heartbeat everywhere. I had known in my early years that this day would come. That one day my father would be assassinated because of his pacifist ideals. I knew it when I was 13, hell, I knew it when I was 10. I was hoping so hard right now that it wouldn't be true but every time I tried to hope, all I could see was rivulets of blood running down my father's crushed face. The car abruptly stopped and I lifted my head up to see the Alliance building, thick clouds of smoke pouring out of several broken windows. There were already dozens of fire trucks and ambulances on the scene. I could only walk like a zombie to the nearest person on site. When they all finally recognized me, many stopped in their tracks to give me looks of pity and sympathy. One woman burst into tears and quickly turned her back, hurriedly going back to whatever she was doing. I dug the nails of my manicured hands into my palm till I could feel trickles of blood run down my skin.

"What happened?" I asked, astonishing the man and myself with my calm demeanor.

"No survivors." He whispered in a fearful voice and added no more information. I felt his gaze on my face and he turned away just like the woman had done. The smoke grew thicker and I breathed deeply of the harsh scent, feeling the bitterness work itself all the way down to my throat. A warm hand grabbed mine and I knew it was Duo's but I flung his hand away. I would break if someone else touched me, and all resolve would shatter. There was a screech of tires behind me and I didn't even have to turn around to know that the press was already here. Duo cursed and moved to urge me back to the limo but was careful to give me my space. His fingers brushed the sleeve of my collared shirt and that one invisible contact dropped me to my knees, hands already trying to hide the torrents of grief that released. Someone ran up to me and stuck something sharp stuck into my arm. I gladly welcomed the darkness of the drug but the last thing I remembered was unfamiliar arms softly gathering me up into a comforting cradle.

*~*~*~*~*

My eyes were so swollen that I had difficulty opening my eyes. I felt like I had been crying for hours non-stop, and I probably had, judging from the wetness on my pillow. My hand had been bandaged and I made a fist to feel the cuts I gave to myself.

"Finally awake princess?" Duo said optimistically, trying to cheer me up.

"How long has it been?" My voice croaked out as I pushed my covers away to sit up. I was in my favorite nightgown, one my father had bought for me in Paris. I tugged at the smooth white satin bow near the bottom. Who had dressed me?

"Two days." Heero said quietly from the corner of my room. I whirled my head, mouth slightly open in shock at the sight of him actually standing in my room. He usually avoided my room like the black plague. "Your father's funeral was yesterday."

I blinked back fresh tears, too drained to let out another drop. I settled for looking down at my lap and tightly shutting my eyes.

"D-did the press-"

"No, the funeral was private." He answered back.

"I want to visit his grave." I said resolutely, already struggling to get up. I felt a short bout of dizziness but walked step by step to my bathroom. "Please leave my room while I get dressed."

Duo opened his mouth to argue but stopped himself in time when he saw my determination. I didn't even turn around to see if they had truly left.

An hour later, I was in the limo with Duo, Heero, and two other strange men. I didn't question their appearance and throughout the ride, I desperately fought back the tears that kept struggling to spill over. I had to be strong. I knew this would happen one day and crying would do nothing.

My father's grave was buried in a small plot of the Peacecraft family, the dark brown earth still fresh from the recent burial. The four men positioned themselves in a fan around me as I perplexedly stared at the beautifully carved marble tombstone. There was a simple rose wreath that I knew was from my brother and a small bouquet of lilies from my mother. My hands were empty and I vaguely remembered that people brought flowers to graves. I opened my mouth to speak but found my throat so dry that only a rasping sound came out. I swallowed and tried again.

"Could you leave me alone, please?" I asked faintly. I could feel the hesitation but all four moved far enough away so that I could talk without being heard. I knelt on the packed earth and ran my fingers over the chiseled writing beneath his name: The question is not whether how we will die, but how we will live. It was perfect for my father, and knowing him, he had probably picked his gravestone himself.

"Did you know? Were you prepared to give your life for ideals?" I finally asked, sounding miserable even to my own ears. "Who's going to keep the peace now, father? Was the marriage for nothing? Who's going to make your dreams come true if you're dead?" A tear dropped from my eye and I made no move to brush it away as another rapidly followed. "How am I going to be happy now if you're not around to see it?" I leaned my forehead against the tombstone and allowed one of my tears to fall on the cold stone. I kissed the tombstone as if I was kissing my father's forehead and sat back. A cool sea breeze caressed my golden hair and I looked past the grave to see the blue ocean stretching miles ahead. The pang of heartache began to ease away as the ebb and flow of the tide distracted me. I continued to stare beyond the sea and at the far off horizon and wondered what was to be done now. I still wanted to cry, but now was not the time to do so. If my father saw me now, he would tweak my nose and tell me to be stronger. I grinned as a strong image of him beaming down on me came to mind. He had left unfinished work behind, and somehow, I knew that I would have to be the one to finish it. Not my brother, not the other members of the Alliance, not anybody else. I had to finish it all because I knew that's what he would have wanted.

I swiped at my eyes and rubbed the tiredness out of them. With one last lingering touch on his grave, I stood up, feeling infinitely stronger and turned around to flash a smile at the four men. The sorrow from my father's death would take time to heal and soothe away, but at least I had my memories. And it will have to be that with my memories, I will take up the incomplete task of bringing peace to earth and space. My own matrimonial unhappiness and grief will have to wait.

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puppetmonkey5562: thanks for the compliment, I hope you liked this chapter too!

The Black Rose: wow, thanks for reading my story. Have I mentioned that I love your story Missing by a mile? Sigh, now that is a excellent piece of writing. I hope you'll manage to stay interested in this story. It might be kind of angsty, but then again, I'm not sure where this story will go, I do have an idea of what the ending will be.