Of Wishes and Fishes.
Part 2- Opening Pandora's Box.
Disclaimer: see part the first.
Authors notes: Whoa! Seems I struck a nerve with this one. I'll strive not to disappoint. Also, please note that it's SHINJI who's doing the wishing. That makes a difference, believe me! Now, back to our show
It started out as a normal day for one Shinji Ikari, normalcy being as follows:
Wake up from a fitful slumber and perform morning decontamination procedures. Make breakfast for drunken slob and German hellion Make lunches for self and hellion. Watch zombie slob ingest her version of aqua vitae and turn miraculously into a human being. Participate in Asuka's morning aerobics routine (slap and scream Baka multiple times-great for limber fingers and toning the vocal cords) Get dragged to school. Fall asleep at school. Wait for senile old fart to dismiss the class Get dragged back home again.
Fortunately, Asuka had decided to leave with Hikari Horaki to assault the local malls, so he was spared the usual "drag" race home. Touji was going to a food festival at the civic center and Kensuke was planning on attending a war film marathon, so our errant anti-hero was left to his own devices. With no plans and few prospects, he began the weary walk home. Luck running true to form, it began to pour.
"Why me? Why do these things happen to me all the time?"
"Because you're a whiny little loser, that's why" said his inner voice.
Shinji was forced to agree. "Not to mention a drip," he added wryly.
Meanwhile, a certain warm-water bird had finally slept off his hangover and found himself with a bad case of the munchies. Hearing the horrible ratcheting snores emanating from his owners' room, he concluded he was better off with self-service and was currently observing Shinji's new "pets" with more than passing interest. He endeavored to obtain these brightly colored morsels with a carefully inserted flipper. Instead of fish, he was given the unexpected displeasure of having a rather large mousetrap snapping painfully on said flipper. The mousetrap then disappeared as quickly and mysteriously as it had appeared, making the bird doubt his sanity. To make matters worse, the 2 fish appeared to be...giggling?! Weirdness quotient exceeded for the day, the bird beat a hasty retreat, intending to re-evaluate the situation later...after he had a few beers.
A sodden Shinji finally arrived at the apartment, picking his way carefully through the obstacle course left by Misato's shopping spree. Nothing much on the tube, just some news story about a squirrel being used to test some experimental diving suit. He made his way to his room and discovered his newfound companions-to-be swimming around.
"Wonder how drunk she was when she got this?"
Still, the fishbowl reminded him of his life...always watched, always tested, always used...which brought him to his primary source of pain.
"Father. He brought me here because he had a "use" for me. Bastard! I wish he'd go..." What followed was a description of what ordinarily would be an anatomical, not to mention self-inflicted sexual impossibility.
"Such a potty mouth!" Came a small voice...female from the sound of it.
"But, considering who's being wished about, we don't mind at all!" Came a second voice, this time male. There was a sudden flash of light, accompanied by a "poof" sound. Shinji turned, to find himself facing two flying, tiny people with huge grins on their faces. The male had green hair. He also was wearing overalls, and carried a plunger. His pink haired female counterpart was dressed in similar fashion. Shinji could have asked the obvious question. Instead...
"Excuse me, but could you tell me why you're dressed that way?"
The male answered. "Your wish, Shinji! Had to do some renovation of the plumbing system to handle it, but all in all..."
"Cosmo, you shouldn't work so hard, you're all flushed!"
"Sorry Wanda, but you know how I always plunge into things."
Shinji in the meantime was growing a little impatient, and more puzzled than ever.
"Hold it! What do my wishes have to do with anything, and just who...or what...are you?"
"I'm Cosmo and she's Wanda..."
"...And we're your fairy godparents." This utterance accompanied by a flashing neon sign floating in mid-air.
"We try to make kids happy by granting their wishes, like we just did with yours!"
It suddenly sank in. The realization of what he had wished for followed by what the two fairies said hit him like a bowl of Misato's curried ramen
He started to giggle uncontrollably.
Normality had just been tossed out the window!
Meanwhile, at NERV...
A medical team summoned by security made their way out of commander Ikari's office carrying that individual down to the hospital wing...those that weren't peeing in their pants from laughing so hard at what they had witnessed. They had been sworn to secrecy but human nature being what it was...
Suffice to say that even the normally dour Fyutsuki was seen walking around with a foolish grin on his face for the next several days, while a certain female Doctor concluded she was no longer enough to satisfy Gendos' urges. A new element had been added to the equation.
Chaos theory, anyone?
Part 2- Opening Pandora's Box.
Disclaimer: see part the first.
Authors notes: Whoa! Seems I struck a nerve with this one. I'll strive not to disappoint. Also, please note that it's SHINJI who's doing the wishing. That makes a difference, believe me! Now, back to our show
It started out as a normal day for one Shinji Ikari, normalcy being as follows:
Wake up from a fitful slumber and perform morning decontamination procedures. Make breakfast for drunken slob and German hellion Make lunches for self and hellion. Watch zombie slob ingest her version of aqua vitae and turn miraculously into a human being. Participate in Asuka's morning aerobics routine (slap and scream Baka multiple times-great for limber fingers and toning the vocal cords) Get dragged to school. Fall asleep at school. Wait for senile old fart to dismiss the class Get dragged back home again.
Fortunately, Asuka had decided to leave with Hikari Horaki to assault the local malls, so he was spared the usual "drag" race home. Touji was going to a food festival at the civic center and Kensuke was planning on attending a war film marathon, so our errant anti-hero was left to his own devices. With no plans and few prospects, he began the weary walk home. Luck running true to form, it began to pour.
"Why me? Why do these things happen to me all the time?"
"Because you're a whiny little loser, that's why" said his inner voice.
Shinji was forced to agree. "Not to mention a drip," he added wryly.
Meanwhile, a certain warm-water bird had finally slept off his hangover and found himself with a bad case of the munchies. Hearing the horrible ratcheting snores emanating from his owners' room, he concluded he was better off with self-service and was currently observing Shinji's new "pets" with more than passing interest. He endeavored to obtain these brightly colored morsels with a carefully inserted flipper. Instead of fish, he was given the unexpected displeasure of having a rather large mousetrap snapping painfully on said flipper. The mousetrap then disappeared as quickly and mysteriously as it had appeared, making the bird doubt his sanity. To make matters worse, the 2 fish appeared to be...giggling?! Weirdness quotient exceeded for the day, the bird beat a hasty retreat, intending to re-evaluate the situation later...after he had a few beers.
A sodden Shinji finally arrived at the apartment, picking his way carefully through the obstacle course left by Misato's shopping spree. Nothing much on the tube, just some news story about a squirrel being used to test some experimental diving suit. He made his way to his room and discovered his newfound companions-to-be swimming around.
"Wonder how drunk she was when she got this?"
Still, the fishbowl reminded him of his life...always watched, always tested, always used...which brought him to his primary source of pain.
"Father. He brought me here because he had a "use" for me. Bastard! I wish he'd go..." What followed was a description of what ordinarily would be an anatomical, not to mention self-inflicted sexual impossibility.
"Such a potty mouth!" Came a small voice...female from the sound of it.
"But, considering who's being wished about, we don't mind at all!" Came a second voice, this time male. There was a sudden flash of light, accompanied by a "poof" sound. Shinji turned, to find himself facing two flying, tiny people with huge grins on their faces. The male had green hair. He also was wearing overalls, and carried a plunger. His pink haired female counterpart was dressed in similar fashion. Shinji could have asked the obvious question. Instead...
"Excuse me, but could you tell me why you're dressed that way?"
The male answered. "Your wish, Shinji! Had to do some renovation of the plumbing system to handle it, but all in all..."
"Cosmo, you shouldn't work so hard, you're all flushed!"
"Sorry Wanda, but you know how I always plunge into things."
Shinji in the meantime was growing a little impatient, and more puzzled than ever.
"Hold it! What do my wishes have to do with anything, and just who...or what...are you?"
"I'm Cosmo and she's Wanda..."
"...And we're your fairy godparents." This utterance accompanied by a flashing neon sign floating in mid-air.
"We try to make kids happy by granting their wishes, like we just did with yours!"
It suddenly sank in. The realization of what he had wished for followed by what the two fairies said hit him like a bowl of Misato's curried ramen
He started to giggle uncontrollably.
Normality had just been tossed out the window!
Meanwhile, at NERV...
A medical team summoned by security made their way out of commander Ikari's office carrying that individual down to the hospital wing...those that weren't peeing in their pants from laughing so hard at what they had witnessed. They had been sworn to secrecy but human nature being what it was...
Suffice to say that even the normally dour Fyutsuki was seen walking around with a foolish grin on his face for the next several days, while a certain female Doctor concluded she was no longer enough to satisfy Gendos' urges. A new element had been added to the equation.
Chaos theory, anyone?
