Spaces

The spaces between our footsteps
Are filled with memories
Of us walking along the beach
As the waves lapped our feet.
And sometimes I wonder if it meant
Something more than friendship when you dried my tears
And why, if you're not here,
Do the memories still remain?

The spaces between the days
The hours I'm awake
Seem to last forever.
And so science says that time goes on.
But if time goes on,
Then why does it feel like it keeps stopping?
Every time I look at you, my heart falls
Deep into my chest, farther into space.

The spaces between your world
And mine seem to never end.
Stretching across endless deserts
That could go on for miles if we let them.
Why don't we stop those spaces from growing?
Why can't you just go back
To the way you were before things changed?
And where do these deserts lead?

The spaces between my words
Grow longer as I speak.
Those long pauses that I thought would never come
From lack of conversation, lack of things to say.
How come they suddenly started appearing?
From where do they grow?
And why do they keep coming
When I always have more to say?

I thought that you would fill all the spaces up for me.
I thought they'd be all gone.
I thought you could change everything
That I had ever done.
And I thought the emptiness would be filled
And that I would no longer be alone.
I suppose that the water came and washed away
What used to fill all my spaces.

Dear Journal,

Okay, so it seems a little bit like I lost something that I used to have. But in a way, I sort of did. I mean, before, I used to look at him as a friend that was always there for me, and it was a comfort. Now, I know I still have the comfort of him always being there as a friend, but the fear that that's all he will ever be is beginning to overrule the comfort.

Listen to me, I sound like some obsessive stalker on a Spanish soap opera. He is not going to take over my life. I will maintain composure and be the Hermione Granger I was before I realized how I really felt.

Hermione

"These are amazing," he said aloud this time, looking at the words written across the pages in front of him. He felt his confidence building. Maybe all that thinking he had done was about to pay off.