Sheentastic Voyage
by Gary D. Snyder
Chapter 14:
Sheen and Libby said nothing for some time as the three moved further along the autonomic regulatory system, but Ultra Lord did not seem to notice their silence. He seemed intent on following some pre-determined path that the others could not see and did not hesitate in choosing which passage to take when they arrived at an intersection. Libby wondered how it was that he was so sure of the way to go, but was more concerned about the consequences that would arise when he reached his destination. If only Sheen could understand what was happening she was sure that they could find a way to stop Ultra Lord. Unfortunately Sheen was deeply entrenched in his unquestioning hero worship and she could think of no way to pull him out of it.
For Sheen's part he was puzzled and saddened by Libby's antagonism towards the hero. She had been there when Ultra Lord had save Sheen's life, and only Ultra Lord's efforts had gotten them through the defense chamber. Could she really think so little of someone who had done so much for them? And if so, how much could she really think of Sheen who hadn't done anywhere near as much?
In front of them Ultra Lord stopped, so suddenly that Libby and Sheen, lost in their melancholy thoughts, nearly ran right into him. They had reached a massive door that barred their way and there was no apparent means of opening it from this side. After Ultra Lord had studied the door carefully for a few moments he drew back a huge fist and drove it with all his might into the barrier. The thunder of the impact echoed down the corridor for long seconds afterwards but had no visible effect on the door.
"Maybe we took the wrong way," Sheen suggested.
"Impossible." Ultra Lord shook his head. "Our archfoe is on the other side. There can be no mistake. This was placed here to prevent our reaching our ultimate destination."
It must be one of the system safeguards, thought Libby. Good for Jimmy. All she said, however, was, "I guess we'll just have to scrub the mission, right?"
"That's defeatist talk!" Ultra Lord said vehemently. "Ultra Lord always wins against evil."
Not if you can't get to it, Libby thought smugly.
Sheen had been feeling the surface of the door. "Can't you blast through it with your destructo-ray?" he asked.
"Shut up, Sheen!" Libby hissed.
Ultra Lord considered Sheen's suggestion. "It's possible," he admitted. "But it will drain my power cells and leave me dangerously weak for a while. I'd be in no shape to battle the forces beyond. Unless…" He paused. "Unless you were to fight them until my cells re-energized."
Sheen snapped Ultra Lord a smart salute. "Ready, willing, and able, Ultra Lord!" he proclaimed proudly. "Except that we don't have any weapons," he added weakly.
"No problemo," Ultra Lord said as he held out his hands. A brilliant radiance briefly surrounded them and when the glow faded he was holding two lethal-looking weapons. He proffered them to Sheen and Libby. "These impacter cannons will hold the opposing forces at bay until I can fight again."
Sheen eagerly accepted one of the weapons. "Cool!" he exclaimed. "Just like the ones you used to defeat the Cyberbots of Optimus Prime in Episode 175! Oh, and it's 'no problema', not 'no problemo', by the way."
Ultra Lord looked puzzled. "Cyberbots?" He shook his head. "I don't recall anything about Cyberbots."
"Well, you've been kind of busy lately. It probably slipped your mind." Sheen examined the weapon, which despite its size was remarkably light and simple in its construction. "Looks like your standard point-and-click device," he commented as he sighted down the colossal barrel.
Libby refused to take the other weapon. "No way," she said.
Ultra Lord pressed it on her. "Take it."
"I said, 'No'. "
Ultra Lord regarded her with hostile suspicion and said, "I suggest you take it if you plan to fight on my side."
The voice was even and calm, but Libby sensed menace in the simple statement. She accepted the cannon with distaste and gingerly held it at arm's length between her thumb and forefinger. "I may have to take it," she muttered defiantly, "but that doesn't mean I have I have to shoot it."
Satisfied that all was ready, Ultra Lord turned back to the door that blocked him from his objective. "All right, battle buddies," he directed. "Stand back and shield your eyes."
Libby and Sheen backed away but, curious as to what was going to happen, kept watching. Ultra Lord aimed both fists at the door and released two beams of blinding light at the barrier. Too late to avoid the dazzling effects of the beams Sheen and Libby instinctively shut their eyes and looked away, still seeing the afterimage of the bright rays inside their closed lids. It wasn't until Ultra Lord spoke that they opened their eyes again and tried to see through.the gradually fading purple haze that obscured their vision. By moving their heads back and forth they could make out some details with their peripheral vision and saw that a gaping hole had been melted through the door.
"All right…battle buddies," Ultra Lord gasped out as he leaned against one of the corridor walls for support. "It's up to…you, now. I'll…join you…shortly…"
Without hesitating Sheen leaped through the opening into the area beyond. "To insanity, and beyond!" he yelled. "Hey, are those tanks?" Libby heard him say just before the unmistakable sounds of combat began.
"You too…Love Monkey," Ultra Lord said, gesturing weakly towards the door. "Store Mister won't make it…alone."
Libby stood paralyzed with indecision, torn between helping Sheen and stopping Ultra Lord. "I won't help you destroy Vox," she finally got out, leveling her cannon on Ultra Lord.
Ultra Lord stared at her incredulously. "You'd…destroy me?" he asked.
"That's up to you," Libby said grimly. "But this insane war ends now."
"The war against…evil…never ends." He straightened with an effort and staggered towards Libby. "Evil…must never…triumph."
Despite all she had reasoned out earlier Libby couldn't help but be moved by Ultra Lord's dedication. Weak and helpless as he was, he still struggled to achieve his goals. He's the enemy here, she told herself fiercely. Maybe he's not really evil. Maybe he really is noble and just misguided. But it's him or Vox.
"A little help here?" Sheen called out over the sound of explosions and blasting beyond the door.
Ultra Lord continued to stagger forward. He was only a few steps away now and Libby raised the cannon to her cheek, taking careful aim at the giant before her. Him or Vox. Or maybe him or the world, she thought, as her finger tightened slowly on the trigger. Forgive me, Sheen. It has to be done.
A voice just behind her startled her and caused her to look away from her target. "Are you guys coming, or what?" Sheen asked impatiently.
In that split second of distraction Ultra Lord surged forward, snatching the weapon from Libby's grasp and snapping it in two. "Traitor!" he snarled. "Minion of evil!"
Sheen looked from Libby to Ultra Lord and back again. "What's going on here?"
"This was our last chance, Sheen," Libby answered in desperation. "I had to try stopping him…before it was too late."
"And she failed," Ultra Lord added, every word like a blow from a fist. Without warning he backhanded Libby, sending her flying backwards into a wall. She hit hard and slumped to the floor, dazed by the force of the blow. Sheen stood motionless, his eyes like saucers as he regarded the wrathful form of Ultra Lord.
"You hit a girl," he finally got out, still in shock. "You hit Libby."
Ultra Lord's voice had no trace of humanity in it. "Mercy is weakness."
"You – hit – Libby!" Sheen growled. "She didn't even have a weapon and you hit her!"
"The enemy deserves no mercy."
Sheen continued to rave. "She was right. You aren't Ultra Lord. You aren't even a decent game. A game has a purpose. All you care about is destruction. And you don't care who you destroy! You have no purpose!"
"My purpose," the figure before him answered evenly, "is to win the game." The voice grew in power and intensity. "That is who I am. That is what Ultra Lord is!"
Sheen shook his head. "I knew Ultra Lord," he said, raising his weapon and aiming carefully. "Ultra Lord was my friend. And you," he concluded viciously, "are no Ultra Lord!" He squeezed the trigger, snarling, "Gotta blast!" As he did so a burst of energy struck Ultra Lord, knocking him down, driving him back several dozen yards, and leaving a furrow in the floor. Sheen stared at his weapon in disbelief. "Wow. That's got more of a kick than I remembered."
"No, Sheen!" screamed Libby, who had recovered and was now pointing at the door. "They're here!"
Sheen looked back and saw the smoldering barrel of one lethal tanks he had been battling protruding through the hole in the door. "Oh, right. Them." He looked back down the corridor and saw Ultra Lord rising to his feet and advancing on them. "This is most certainly not good."
"No," agreed Libby. "We're caught between a dork and a hard place." She looked at Sheen. "What do we do?"
Sheen considered it before again aiming his cannon at the approaching figure of Ultra Lord. "What Ultra Lord would do if he were here," he replied. "We fight the good fight."
End of Chapter 14
Author's Notes:
In most of my stories, such as in this chapter, I enjoy putting in some sly references to other shows, partly because the The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron is rife with them. One of my most subtle in-jokes, in "The Eye of the Llama", was Princess Leama's mention of the Regina Felangie (pseudo-Latin for "Queen of Felangie"). This was a favorite pseudonym of Pheobe Buffay and an homage to the now-ended series Friends, one of my favorite sitcoms.
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