Playing Dumb
A Stargate: SG-1 / Golden Girls Crossover
by Teri
Summary: How many people suspect that Jack is smarter than he lets on? The rest of SG-1 is starting to suspect, too. Well, perhaps people will know for sure once they meet his Aunt Rose from St. Olaf, Minnesota. (Crossover with the Golden Girls.)
Disclaimer: I am not associated with the owners or creators of either Golden Girls or Stargate. I wish I were.
Playing Dumb
Part 2
"Sir?" Carter asked as she entered Colonel O'Neill's office. She obviously had something work related to discuss with him.
"Carter, I really don't have time right now. I am heading to the airport."
She finally looked up and noticed that he had his coat on and looked ready to leave the office. "Are you on your way to D.C., Sir?"
"Nope, Boulder International. Just going to pick up my Aunt," he answered as he walked past her knowing that tidbit would make her follow him.
"Aunt? I didn't know you had an Aunt?"
"Ant? We have ants?" Daniel asked as he joined the two officers in the hallway.
"No Daniel, we don't have ants. I have an AUNT."
"An ant? We have one ant, why is that important?"
Jack just stopped walking and looked at Daniel for a moment. Shaking his head, he muttered, "Danny-boy and Aunt Rose are gonna get on like wildfire."
"Aunt Rose?" Carter asked, already smiling at the idea that meeting someone in the Colonel's family could be the clue they all needed to figure out their enigmatic Colonel.
"Sure, my mother's sister. In fact, Aunt Rose is the one who taught me how to ice skate. I think she wanted me to be an Olympicfigure skater rather than getting into hockey."
"So why didn't you?" Daniel asked, apparently genuinely curious.
"What?"
"Ice skate."
"Oh, well the way Aunt Rose taught me to make figure 8's was by first drawing a snow man then erasing the head and arms. Of course, but the time I finished that the judges weren't interested anymore."
Sam and Daniel exchanged odd glances as Jack walked passed them grinning as Operation Dumb Family Tree' was well underway.
8 - 8 - 8 - 8 - 8 - 8
Jack arrived at the airport, flashed his ID, and was able to get closer to the gate than others there to pick-up family members.
He found a wall to lean-up against as he watched everyone disembark. A totally mismatched pair of women captured his attention. One was tall well above average, perhaps about as tall as he, and the other was only half the height of the first.
"Pussy-cat," the short one began trying to give puppy dog begging eyes.
"No, you old shrew."
"But, Dorothy,"
"Maaaa!"
"But?"
"Shady Pines, Ma, Shady Pines."
Following the pair, he saw a familiar figure.
"So, that is how they started the Great Herring war."
"Oh, shut-up yo-ou twit," another woman said as she noticed him watching them. She smiled at him, "looks like I've already found me a Colorado flyboy." She walked over to him holding herself in that way that said to all that new her that she was on the hunt. "Hello, I am Blanche Deveraux. "
"Jack O'Neill."
"Are you waiting for your wife or your girlfriend?"
"No, ma'am."
"Well that good then," Blanche grabbed his arm and moved close to him. "We are going to have dinner tonight. Just you and me, we'll have some fun."
Rose looked at the poor man Blanche was hitting-on, recognition turned into a slight gasp and a smile.
Jack turned to his Aunt with a big smile. "Aunt Rosie," he walked over to her and gave her a big hug.
"I hardly recognized you," she said as she affectionately swiped his hair.
"Gotten a little gray."
"Girls," Rose got the other three ladies attention. "I want you to met my nephew."
"Jack," he grinned with his best smile.
"Well, you already met Blanche and this is Dorothy and Sophia." Rose pointed out each of the ladies to her favorite nephew.
"This handsome man is related to you Rose?" Blanche shook her head slightly, "I just don't believe it."
"Aunt Rose," Jack interrupted. "I didn't know you were bringing friends?"
Hope you liked this short little update.
Thanks,
Teri
March 13, 2005
I have never answered reviews in a story before, but there were several for chapter one that made me want to try it this time. Thank you to all of you who viewed.
Rude's Mom & OffTheGrass: I hadn't originally intended to bring the other girls, but I thought you both had wonderful ideas, which I might steal, so Thanks!
Zeilfanaat: Okay, I will remember that not everyone has seen the show. If you ever get the opportunity, try it out. It is very funny. The general idea is that there are four older woman together sharing a house in Miami Beach. There is Rose -"The Air Head" from St. Olaf, Minnesota, Blanche - "The Slut" from Georgia, Dorothy and her mother Sophia. Sophia is from Sicily as a girl and New York as an adult and she always speaks her mind. I appreciate your confidence that I won't lose you writing a crossover of a story you aren't familiar with.
Ted Sadler: Thank you, as the King of unusual Stargate Crossovers, I appreciate it.
Athenais: Jack sounds like MacGyver? Well, this is probably only my second story where I didn't start out with the premise that he is MacGyver so I better work on that
Jaka: I couldn't agree more.
Witchbsword: I suppose it is an odd combination, but no they are easily two of my favorite shows.
Random Reviewer: THANK YOU!
E-Devay: Actually, I know that St. Olaf is a college, but it is also the fictitious home of Rose in the "Golden Girls." In fact, I always thought it was funny that a town with so many "dumb" stories attached to it got its name from a college. If you have never heard one of Rose's St. Olaf stories you are missing a treat. However, thanks for letting me know.
Cherryblossomjen: Thanks that was my favorite part too. :)
Thank you to: Morrolan, Sci Fi Fan Gillian, dottid, Sarah, Razzbaby, pain in the mikta, jmcqk6, SilverRider, anon, JamSack, Sarahx, Jetsuo RT, Manda, JOSH, SG1Reader, ErinM, & James for your reviews and kind notes. It is greatly appreciated.
