Title: Maybe, Just Maybe
Disclaimer: Please don't; purely for entertainment, creators of 'Buffy'. The characters I created are mine. So steal my idea, or 'borrow' without my permission, and I will be the one to sue.
Pairings:Buffy/Faith
Note:Around Season 3, before 'Bad Girls,' and just so you know, I'm rough on my viewings of S3 so if I get things wrong please let me know. Still not sure if 'Bad Girls' will happen. Not sure yet. We'll see as it unfolds.
Feedback: Always =)
Rating: R
Special Note: Thanks for being so patient with the way the fic went. I hop eyou enjoy it. I especially didn't say what would happen because I wanted to keep it a secret to see if you would like it. Thanks for reading (if you're still interested!!! lol!). Remember to tell me if it sucks or not! I will appreciate any comment!
Chapter 8
I backed away. 'Why don't I want you?' I raised my eyebrows. I could feel tears threatening to challenge each other for who could reach my chin the fastest.
She got up and moved from foot to foot a little. 'Yeah,' she said after breathing a little.
I turned my back on her, beginning to walk away, and let out a rush of air through my mouth, dumbfounded at her words. 'Faith…you…' I turned back to face her. I was about to yell some full blown speech about how she was with my best friend and how I was not the one with the lack of wanting.
But I couldn't. Because she…'C'mere,' I said, and she immediately did. I moved my hand up to her face, to wipe away the tears there, and her cheek moved into the palm of my hand, and her eyes threatened to close. I pursed my lips as I wiped the tears from her eyes, then ran the back of my index finger along her reddened cheek. Where I had hit her. Really hard. 'Faith…I never…'
'It's okay. I understand.' She took a breath and I moved my hand away. She shook her head, as if she was mad at herself. 'Shouldn't have said anything.' She frowned and I looked up at her.
'No, Faith, it's okay.'
'No, B it's not. The other day, I blew you off and I didn't mean for everything I said to come out the way it did. But it did, and I can't change that NOW.' She had tried to explain herself and done it well. I felt as if I should jump her right now, as my inward notions of excitement danced around in my stomach, of all places. 'I blew it. That's it,' she muttered as she did something with her lips, licked over them, pulled them into her mouth. Nervousness. Maybe?
I let out a little noise before pulling her over to the steps. I sat down and she sat beside me, on the same step. I turned to face her and she, me.
'Faith. I've…you know, I…was upset that day, because…well…I honestly, wanted you to say that that night was wonderful. But you didn't and I felt like crap for getting my hopes up, which…' Her face had lid up. '…Which I thought would make me feel stupid for making such a big deal out of it. Faith, I'm a Slayer. You're a Slayer. We're Slayers. We're girls, who-'
'Girls, right. We shouldn't be together. Of course. Stupid me.'
'No, Faith, what I'm trying to say is…we are the Slayers. You and me. We have a connection. A physical…mental…and I'm hoping an emotional connection. I thought that you got me, and I thought I got you, but when all that happened and then you said you didn't know what you wanted I felt so stupid for thinking that that was the way that it worked.'
She sighed loud and rubbed her temples for a second. 'I'm such a screw up.'
'No, you're not, Faith. You're a very talented, very special…very sexy Slayer.'
'No, you know what, B?' she said as she shuffled a little in her position. 'There was one per cent of me that knew what I wanted. And even though it's just one per cent…I knew I wanted to be…' She nudged me a little. She didn't need to say the words.
'You're lying.'
She sniffled. 'Does it look like I'm lying?' she said, releasing a little laugh at the same time.
'So…you planned that, thing?' I asked gently, as not to coax her from looking down into the palms of her hands.
She looked up at me anyway. 'The chocolate?' I nodded and she followed suit. 'Just a little bit, yeah.'
'I thought you were…' I started, hoping she'd catch on.
Faith shook her head. 'Well…I did too. Then there was…stuff…I met…a person…'
I sighed. I knew what was coming next. I raised an eyebrow for a second and cocked my head to the side as I ran my fingers along the creases in the palm of my hand. 'Yeah, I know…about that.' I looked down as to avoid her eyes and she moved.
'Really? Because that makes it a lot easier. I mean I thought "no way can ONE girl turn you," but meeting you was like a whole new…' I raised a hand to her arm and rested it there a moment, looking into her eyes. She looked as if she'd been caught off guard. '…Thing for me.'
'Meeting me?' I repeated, slowly, carefully. Just to clarify.
Her eyebrows, which didn't seem frowned, released as I said those words. She nodded timidly and I immediately moved in to kiss her. Whether or not she was ready for it, I didn't care. I just had to kiss her right now. Any thoughts about Willow and Faith had been pushed to the back of my mind. Right now, I just wanted to bask in the brilliance of me. And her.
I pulled away. 'No, no, I can't do this,' I told myself and moved away.
She sighed and dropped her hands in her lap.
'It's just…you and Willow, and she's my best friend and as much as I like you I can't do this to her, and I mean, it's Will I couldn't hurt her like…' She put a hand up to me.
'Whoa, whoa, whoa…WHAT?!' She shook her head a little and opened her eyes, looking to me as if I'd just told her she was in fact born with five feet.
'You and Willow.'
She raised her eyebrows. 'Me and Red?' she said, then frowned a little. 'What are you talkin' about?'
'Don't fool with me, I saw you guys kissing outside the-' I said, pointing behind my shoulder with my thumb.
By this point she had sat back, nodded her head a good few times. 'Willow needed some of my help.'
I screwed up my face and moved back a little. 'What?'
She chuckled. 'The night we were all supposed to go patrolling, and you didn't show?' She licked over her lips and I nodded. 'She stayed at my place for a while, kinda…asked for some lessons. Said she er…wanted me to do…' she continued as she started looking at my hair. 'I erm…she wanted to learn how to be more…like…me…and I just thought I'd give her a little guidance. She said she needed confidence.'
'So you get together?'
'Not exactly. I don't mean I wanted her to look like the school le…uhm…well it's complicated. She needed some help and I did exactly that.'
- - -
'What are you…?' Willow said, barely above a whisper.
Faith shook her head a little. 'Just trust me.'
'I…I've never…' Willow began.
'Neither have I.' Faith concluded, softly speaking, her hand still at her hip.
Willow replied with a timid nod, repeated a good few times, and Faith nodded also, as if trying to understand this.
She used her other hand to move up Willow's body, and at first ran her hand along her stomach, then up, along her breast, further up along her chest, then up to her chin, up to her lips, then up, to her hair, where she pulled her ponytail out and let her red hair fall around her shoulders.
Willow smiled timidly. 'I didn't think you knew.'
She shook her head either, looking at how Willow's hair was so neatly around her face, yet somehow sexy. 'I only just realised.' She moved in to kiss her again and this time Willow wrapped an arm around Faith's shoulder. She grasped the back of her neck in her hand and massaged it, ran her fingers along it, just touched it, and responded to the feel of it. And as Faith's tongue slipped so softly, gently into her mouth, she moaned, and frowned slightly, as if this was right. She pulled away and smiled. 'You're doing nothing wrong.'
She rose from the bed and moved to the counter, to re-apply her lipstick. She turned to face Willow, who had huffed and moved further into the bed. 'But…I just…I get so…'
'Don't tell me you're scared.'
She shrugged and looked at her putting down the lipstick on the counter.
'Want some lessons?'
Willow paused in thought. 'What kinda lessons? Like how to be like you…and Buffy to get a guy like Angel…or…'
'Okay I said lessons. The rest is up to you. But in truth it's not in how good you kiss – oh, good…by the way – or what you do when you kiss – oh, also…very nice with the neck thing, that was a sure juicer – I think it's the way you are like…with confidence.'
'Oh.'
'I'm gonna think of a couple of activities for the next few days, like…things that might take you by surprise and you have to play along with them, as if…well…you'll see.'
Willow nodded and got up. 'Like, what?'
Faith scrunched up her mouth a moment. 'I dunno yet.'
'Oh. Okay. Well I guess I better…split, huh?' She gave Faith a look as if to say "I can use cool vocabulary" and Faith raised an eyebrow for a moment.
'Okay, I'll see you tomorrow…oh but first…' She got up off of the bed and grabbed her leather mini. 'Wanna go to the Bronze?' She licked over her lips and raised her eyebrows. 'Just to…let off some juice.'
Willow smiled. 'Oh, but I don't have anything to…' She realised as Faith waved the leather in her face.
- - -
'Alright, but how do you explain outside the school?' I asked as we walked into the kitchen, her slightly behind me.
'I was teaching her some confidence. Girl needed to learn how to "not care" about what the people around her thought. Otherwise she wouldn't be able to get on with her job, if she's coming on patrol with us. You know how it is, she gets all nervous around people.'
I frowned a little as she passed me and sat on one of the kitchen stools. 'Yeah, but…'
'I can't believe you actually, thought we were…' She made an eyebrow thing and her eyes darted around a little as she searched for her word. Or…didn't.
'Yeah, I know, I guess I just…' I felt silly. No I didn't. What about the leg? 'No, cos in the library she was touching your leg and you didn't do anything about it. You liked it.'
Faith shrugged. 'Of course I liked it, she's a hot girl touching my leg.' She chuckled a little and one side of my mouth tugged up into a smile. I folded my arms across my chest.
'I feel so stupid,' I said softly, looking down into the space between us, though I shut up fast as she reached both arms out to me and pulled me in close to her. She departed her legs and I stepped in.
'Ey.' She shook her head. 'Don't.' I loved how she just about pronounced the "t" on the end of that don't. Like a scratchy, "bitchy" type of don't, that could also be seen as a "fed up and tired" don't.
'But I was-'
'I'm serious, I'm the one that should be feeling stupid.'
Silence. I was just watching how her eyes were so pure, so sincere at that moment. She was filled with a newer light that I hadn't seen in her before. Ever. I hadn't thought to look there. Even with that kiss, days ago. How gentle she was. It didn't occur to me that she was full of thoughtfulness and sincerity that was really making her a gentle being inside. How could she let me see this now? How did I know this from just looking into her eyes? Was it because she let me see?
'You can be, so amazing, do you know that?' I said, chuckling out a breath as I said 'amazing,' my throat constricting due to tears that I think were about to challenge ME. I shook my head a little as I looked at her, and she looked right back at me. At me.
I unfolded my arms and wrapped them very slowly, very carefully around her, as if scared that she could turn any moment, change her mind. Although when I leant my head upon hers, I felt her arms moving to the small off my back, beginning to embrace me. So she really did want me.
