Beta props to Colin, Kat, and to Trisha. Thanks loves!

Man, this chapter went through so many rewrites. Probably because I originally wrote it around... a year and a half ago? More? I don't remember. A long-ass time ago XD

Warnings for this chapter include Bastard!Subaru and some Kamui abuse. Poor Kamui, all he wants is some sweet love /

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We were in a dimly-lit restaurant together, Sorata, Arashi, Yuzuriha, Kamui and I. The power in their apartment had gone out in the thunderstorm that had blown in that day, so for dinner, Sorata treated us all to some hole-in-the wall that he claimed had the best ramen in Tokyo. I privately suspected it was only the best-priced ramen in the city.

The restaurant was dingy, musty, and we were the only ones there. I sat uncomfortably in the too-small cheap plastic booth, carefully away from Kamui who sat next to me, practically falling off the edge.

I was irritable. Being around the others that night was a mistake, and I knew it from the beginning. But I went, against my judgment, because Kamui asked me to, and because I didn't know how to say no.

I stood up, abruptly, and the conversation trailed off as my companions looked at me. I nodded, telling them I'd be right back. Headed to the bathroom, just to get a moment to breathe.

I leaned against the sink in the bathroom, looking up and watching a bug flicker inside the casing of the small overhead light.

The door opened and closed behind me, and I looked down, into the mirror, to see Kamui staring at me. I suppose he followed me because he was concerned, but I hadn't been gone more than a minute or so. My eyes narrowed as I watched him shift nervously. I didn't want him here.

"Subaru-san? Are you alright?" He moved closer, hand on my arm. Even through my shirt, his fingers were warm, uncomfortably so. I shrugged, trying to dislodge him, but it didn't work. He stepped closer, tongue flickering out briefly to moisten his lips.

"I'm fine." I was curt, pulling away from him. I stood, staring at the wall, willing him to go away.

Seconds went by. I could hear his breathing, quiet though it was. Then his footsteps, coming closer. A hand fell on my back. "You're lying to me."

"I'm fine Kamui. Go back to the others." I kept my voice quiet, firm, struggling to contain the sudden anger that rose up in me. Why couldn't he just leave me alone? Seconds slipped by, but he didn't move.

Finally, I turned around, quickly enough that Kamui jumped, eyes wide, vulnerable. I caught his still upraised hand in a tight grip. His breath caught in his throat, a soft surprised sound.

I caught him around the back of the neck, pulled him close to me, until we were practically nose-to-nose. "What do you want?"

"I..." he trailed off, licking his lips again. He was blushing, faintly. My stomach twisted, and I clenched my jaw, realizing what was happening, finally. He still believed he was in love with me, even though I had pushed him away unfalteringly since the first night.

I let his hand go, raising my fingers to his cheek. He flinched slightly, they were still cold from the water. I studied him, trying to figure out what to do, how to get him to go away. The boy would be the death of me, otherwise.

When the solution hit me, I couldn't help but laugh slightly, a couple of harsh syllables that contained nothing of joy.

"Alright, Kamui." I brought my hands down to the buttons of his shirt.

His shirt made a delightful, starchy snap as I pulled it out of the waistband of his pants and spread it open. His eyes were closed now, his face turned away. He was breathing in these little gasps. It was adorable. I leaned down to nip at his collarbone, and he yelped softly.

"Relax, Kamui-kun." Some more rational part of me was frightened at the tone of my voice. I had heard it before.

I pushed him, a small smile hovering on my lips as I watched him stumble and fall against the wall, startled eyes flying open to lock with mine. I grabbed his shoulder, held him in place even as my other hand pulled at the waist of his pants.

He made a small, scared squeak, hands slamming up against my chest as he cast a worried glance at the door. I nuzzled into his neck, grazing his skin with my teeth, as I tugged his zipper down, sliding my hand into his pants.

"Subaru-san!" He whispered, frightened, even as his body jumped at my touch. When I didn't respond, he pushed at me, telling me to stop. I didn't want to hear it. I kissed him, hard, muffling any more protests.

Several seconds later, he pulled away from the kiss, panting. He was flushed, sweating slightly, eyes were screwed tightly shut. I laughed softly, brought my hand up from stroking him to catch his chin and pull his lips back up to mine, teeth pulling on his bottom lip.

I could hear Sorata outside, gushing over the food, which had finally arrived. I turned my head slightly.

"Subaru, stop!" Kamui was panicked now, he had heard them also. He twisted in my grip, trying to get away. I watched him as he tried to break my hold on him, tears threatening to brim over.

I smiled at him, an angry, contemptuous twist of my lips, and stepped away, releasing him to turn to the sink, washing my hands, watching as he shakily fixed his clothing. I dried my hands, turning back to him.

He wrapped his arms around himself, averting his eyes. He was still breathing heavily, eyes dark.

"They're waiting for us, Kamui." My words were light, nonchalant. He tightened his arms around himself, and bit his lip. I watched him for a few moments, letting the silence grow between us. Finally, he finally looked up at me, and I could see the fear in his eyes.

I laughed softly to myself and then turned, tossing the paper towel into the trash. He wasn't going to be any more trouble.

I left him there, went to rejoin the rest. His taste still lingered on my lips.