Relick: Konnichiwa, minna-san (Hello, everyone)! Re-chan here, with another one of my bizarre fics! I had gone to Broadway last month with my theater class and had the best New York experience of my 16-year life! I got to see Avenue Q, the most politically IN-correct show EVER! It was, in short, amazing.

Hiei: I don't see what's so great about it…

Kuwabara: Hiei's right, Re-chan. It WAS just a puppet show.

Relick: JUST a puppet show! Avenue Q was unlike any puppet show I've ever seen:big bursts of flames tower behind Relick:

Kuwabara:cowering behind: Hiei Ok, ok, Gomen ne…(Sorry)

Relick: all smiles: All is forgiven! Anyway, I decided to do a Yu Yu version of one of my favorite songs in the show. I also thought it'd be fun to poke fun at people who believe that Kurama is gay. No offense, guys, I just don't see it.

Kuwabara: And please don't just review as a chance to say otherwise.

Relick: Thanks Kuwa-chan! Oh and before I forget, I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho or Avenue Q. I wish I did though. I want a Kate Monster puppet!

If You Were Gay

By

Robert Lopez and Jeff Marx

(With some character changes by Relick)

Kurama:reading a book: Ahhh…An afternoon alone with my favorite book, "Broadway Musicals of the 1940s." No roommate to bother me. How can it get better than this?

Yusuke:comes in: Oh hi Kurama!

Kurama:annoyed: Hi Yusuke…

Yusuke: You'll never guess what happened to me on the subway! This guy was smiling at me and talking to me!

Kurama: Yeah that's very interesting…

Yusuke: And I think he was coming on to me! I think he might've thought I was gay.

Kurama:clears throat: W-well, why are you telling me this? Why should I care? I don't care. What'd you have for lunch today?

Yusuke: Well, you don't have to get all defensive about it, Kurama…

Kurama: I AM NOT GETTING DEFENSIVE! Why should I care about some gay guy you met? I am trying to read!

Yusuke: Yeah, but Kurama. I think that maybe this is something that we should be able to talk about—

Kurama: Well I don't want to talk about it Yusuke. This conversation is over!

Yusuke: But!

Kurama:sharply: OVER!

Yusuke: Well, okay…but just so you know….

:singing: If you were gay,

That'd be okay.

I mean cause hey!

I'd like you anyway!

And so you see,

If it were me,

I would feel free to say

That I was gay

(But I'm not gay)

Kurama: Yusuke, please, I am trying to read. :goes back to his book:

Yusuke:stares at him skeptically:

Kurama: What?

Yusuke:singing: If you were queer,

Kurama: Argh, Yusuke!

Yusuke: I'd still be here

Kurama: Yusuke, I'm trying to read this book.

Yusuke: Year after year

Kurama: Yusuke!

Yusuke: Because you're dear to me!

Kurama: ARGH!

Yusuke: And I know that you

Kurama: What?

Yusuke: Would accept me too

Kurama: I would?

Yusuke: If I told you today

Hey, guess what? I'm gay!

(But I'm not gay)

I'm happy, just being with you!

So what's it matter to me

What you do in bed with guys?

Kurama: Yusuke, that is gross!

Yusuke:speaking: No it's not!

:singing: If you were gay,

I'd shout HOORAY!

Kurama: I am not listening:burying his face in his book:

Yusuke: And here I'd stay!

Kurama: LA LA LA LA LA!

Yusuke: But I wouldn't get in your way!

Kurama:horrified: AHHH!

Yusuke: You can count on me

To always be

Beside you every day

To tell you it's okay

You were just born that way

And as they say,

It's in your DNA,

You're gay!

Kurama: I AM NOT GAY!

Yusuke:speaking: If you were gay!

Kurama:slumps his head into the book, defeated:

Relick: Wow! That was fun. And so you all know, I have absolutely NO problem with gays or lesbians. Hell, my aunt is lesbian, and that doesn't stop her from being the best aunt ever! Love ya, Auntie Bonnie:hugs:

Hiei: Well…that was mildly entertaining.

Kuwabara: Oh, drop the act Hiei! I saw you swaying your head to the music!

Hiei: Hn.

Relick: Eheheheh…oKAY…Till next time everyone!