Konnichiwa, minna! Arigato to my loyal reviewers... your feedback and encouragement is what keeps STLF going! I know that I added a strange twist to Ch. 8, but I hope that nobody hates me for it. I love Ryuichi... he's so cute and sexy! But in the end, it's up to you guys who Shuichi chooses. Who knows? I might decide to be evil again and KILL someone off... MWUHAHAHAHA!!! We'll see how the next few chapters go. plotting evil schemes

In this chapter, I used the song "Be There" by Nittle Grasper. Since the entire lyrics were never published, I decided to complete them myself. Let me know what you think of them... but be kind! At least I tried. I borrowed a piece from the manga and another piece from Maki Murikami's original doujinshi, "HELP!"- which was the pilot for Gravitation.

This chapter of STLF is dedicated to Youko Forever... thank you for the encouragement and support!

Disclaimer: Repeat after me... "Maki Murikami is the Goddess of Gravitation." Very good children.

Regular italicized writing indicates thoughts

Bold italicized writing indicates conscience

Chapter 9: Look Beneath the Surface of My Mask

The next day at NG Studios, the cast of Bad Luck celebrated Shuichi passing his driver's test. Though no one there would ever feel safe on the road again, they were still impressed at the fact that the singer had actually passed the test without bribery or blackmail.

But they did wonder if the driving instructor was a fan girl. Or just completely insane.

They didn't dare express any of these thoughts with K around though. He had been overjoyed when he had received the news.

After a quick celebration, they prepared themselves to start on the next track. Or that's what would have happened if not for the excitement in the hallway that interrupted them.

"Hey, did you hear them?"

"Yeah, it's the remake of their triple platinum single, 'Be There'."

"Kami-sama! It's even BETTER than the original!"

"This is what makes them legends!"

"Let's go listen! They'll let us in, right?"

"I hope so... we won't ever get a chance like this again."

The members of Bad Luck looked at each other in shock. Shuichi opened his mouth, only able to let out a whimper. After clearing his throat and trying a second time, he was finally able to articulate what was on his mind.

"A remake of 'Be There'? Even better than the original? Is that possible?" The vocalist threw the question at his manager, since K had worked with Ryuichi longer than the rest of them. The blonde narrowed his eyes and nodded.

"Shall we find out for ourselves?" After a quick consensus, the entire group rose and made their way to the studio in which Nittle Grasper worked in.

Even with the superior soundproofing that surrounded each studio, the vibration from the Grasper's studio resonated down the hallway. A large crowd had already blocked the entrance, but with a wave of his rifle, the crowd quickly moved aside for K. Pushing the pink-haired boy forward to get a better look, Bad Luck's manager waited for his vocalist's reaction.

"Help me, somebody help me...

But if you think I'm your burden

Then I'll say 'So long' and flee."

It was breathtaking.

"The harsh reality of a bittersweet existence

Cripples the purity of your once innocent mind

I wait alone in the remains of what you left behind

Searching for a vestige of your now fading light."

Nothing that Nittle Grasper had recorded previously could compare to this.

"Where am I- can anyone find me?

I'll cry out into the forsaken night..."

Shuichi watched in wonder, reveling in his idol's passionate display.

"Please HELP me... {Somebody help me!}

If you consider me to be your burden

I will say 'So long' anytime

But I only hope that you will

Be there anytime!"

Then the pink-haired singer narrowed his eyes, noticing something unusual about Ryuichi's face.

"A sweet smile invites me to an everlasting sabbat

Only a mask hiding humanity's predilection for sin

Reaching out to embrace your motionless body

You crumble to dust under my hesitant touch."

It almost appeared as if the legendary Grasper had tears coming down his cheeks.

"I'm so lost- can anyone guide me?

I'll cry out into the forsaken night..."

Then with a startling recognition, he realized that it was true. His god was actually crying as he sang the lyrics.

"Please HELP me... {Somebody help me!}

If you consider me to be your burden

I will say 'So long' anytime

But I only hope that you will

Be there anytime!"

No one else had realized it though. They were too mesmerized by his performance to be able to perceive anything else.

"Save me, won't you redeem me?

If I'm your burden then I'll flee

But my only hope for the future is

That one day you'll be there for me."

His voice wove a spell around everyone who listened.

"So be there for me...

Be there for me...."

The original "Be There" had been speeded up the slightest bit and upgraded with a rhythm that was even more intricate than before. In further refining the harmony with a synthesizer, the sound was even more soulful than before. The result was a speechless audience.

Everyone who was listening was enraptured by the phenomenal voice. There had yet to be a single comment about the moist drops that rested on the legendary singer's face. No one had even noticed.

Or perhaps they thought it was all just a part of the show.

If so, they thought wrong.

As the music faded into silence, Ryuichi's eyes flew open in shock at the thundering applause that surrounded him.

Up until that point, he had been so intent on his vocals that he had blocked out the world around him. When he sang, he threw his very being into another his own world where he could feel his emotions without being judged.

And during this song, his emotions were directed at his longing for only one thing.

Or rather, person. And that person also happened to be the only one in the room that was not clapping.

Instead, the pink-haired musician was scrutinizing his idol attentively, not even blinking an eye. Unsure what to say, the Grasper stared back dumbfounded.

Kuso! How could I let my guard down like that? I might as well have screamed 'I love you Shuichi!' at the top of my lungs. Maybe I can play it off.

"Ohayo, Shu-chan! Did you like my pika pika new song?" Falling back easily on his childlike charade, the God of J-pop proceeded to glomp the Bad Luck vocalist.

"Ryuichi-san! It was... great! The best yet!" The younger boy smeared a cheerful expression on his face. He made a mental note to himself to question his hero at a later time concerning the tears.

"You think so, Shu-chan? That makes Kumagorou so happy!" On cue, pink bunny ears poked out from behind the man-child's back.

"Hai, hai! You really are a god! Only Nittle Grasper could have improved what is already perfect! 'Be There' is my favorite song, and now I love it even more!"

The legendary vocalist pulled away from the pink-haired boy at the last comment. Bad Luck's singer arched his eyebrow, concerned once again. His idol wore an expression of detached sadness on his face.

Or was it loneliness?

Averting his eyes from the apprehensive singer, Ryuichi became solemn once again.

"Ryuichi-san? Nani yo?" The boy's anxiety grew with each breathe of silence. After what seemed like a never-ending stillness, a quiet voice answered him.

"Arigato, Shuichi. It makes me happy to know that you like it so much. I rewrote it... just for you." The Grasper's words astounded the young musician.

"F-for ME? Why ME?" Shuichi's voice rose ten decibels until it was a barely audible squeak. Ryuichi smiled kindly at his number one fan.

"Because you're the only one in this world that can see beyond my shine." Bad Luck's vocalist gulped loudly. He was getting a funny feeling in his stomach...

"Nani...? Beyond your... shine?"

The Grasper chuckled good-naturedly. Meeting the violet eyes once more, he directed a knowing look at the boy.

"It's okay, Shuichi. I know that you can see the other side of me."

"Ryuichi-san...."

With a reassuring wink, the God of J-pop turned to leave the studio.

"You have my number, Shu-chan... maybe we get hang out some time! It'll be fun!"

"Eh, hai! Of course!" As soon as his idol had left the room, Shuichi let out a shriek that was pure fan boy.

"KYAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!! My god wants to 'hang out'... with ME! SUGOI!!" Breaking off his shriek as suddenly as it had begun, the singer turned abruptly to his awaiting manager who happened to display a very amused expression on his face.

"Now THAT was interesting. So what did you think of the legend's rebirth?"

"That... was... SO SWEET!!! I can't believe that even Nittle Grasper can improve!"

K smirked. Now was a good time to test the singer's resolve.

"And do you still believe that you can reach them... much less go beyond them?"

Shuichi immediately dropped his fan boy act. This wasn't a question that he would blow off in fun any longer.

"Hai. I don't just believe it... I know it. Bad Luck will stand as an equal to Nittle Grasper in the future. I won't take back what I said before." The blond manager beamed with pride at his star.

"Ah! Maybe Nittle Grasper weren't the only ones to have been reborn recently! I admire your newfound determination. Bad Luck may sooner no longer have to reach for the stars as you may be joining them."

"Hai, that is my intention."

{Las Vegas, Nevada}

Yuki typed the final sentence of his premier book for the United States. After a mere three weeks of intensive writing, his newest romance novel was finally completed. His American publisher had been eager to accept him under their company, offering ridiculously extravagant royalties and bonuses.

With a click of his keyboard mouse, his masterpiece was saved. Another few clicks and it was saved on a floppy disk, ready to be sent out for editing.

A satisfied smile grew on his face. In another three months, it would be out in every bookstore and library.

And undoubtedly, it will have reached Japan by that time as well.

Closing his eyes, the writer leaned back in his chair to stretch out his half-immobilized limbs.

I think I'm truly pleased with this one. I actually thought it was better than my usual.

That's because it's special.

Yeah, it's special.

You're maturing at a rapid rate, Eiri. The old you would never have admitted that something to you.

Yeah, well we all have to grow up sometime.

You can't wait for this one to be printed, can you?

Mnn.

Is it because you want Shuichi to read it?

It could be. I'm not sure if he'll understand it though.

How could he not? After all, it is about the two of you.

I guess I'm just not sure if he'll make the connection. He is a little dense.

He's smarter than you're willing to give him credit for. But you know that already, don't you? Because I wouldn't be saying that if you didn't already know it.

Eh. So when are you going to leave me alone?

I leave when you go back.

If I refuse?

I don't leave. But I think that you'll go back without me pushing you to do so.

Why do you think that?

Because that's your true desire.

I'm uncertain of what I'd be returning to.

You'd be returning home. Where you belong. And where people care about you.

I doubt anyone misses me very much. From what I've heard, NG is embroiled in a lot of inner conflict, Tatsuha is trying to leave the temple, Mika is contemplating divorce, and my father is probably faking death again.

Keeping tabs on them, I see.

Nothing new. Same shit, different day.

Shuichi is waiting for you though.

Why would he bother?

Because you asked him to. Not in so many words- but it was a promise and a request nonetheless.

Mnn. Maybe I shouldn't have done that. Tying him down like that.

It isn't tying him down. It's holding him up.

Mnn.

Anyway, I'm sure that you'll change your mind about staying here sooner or later. You don't even like it here.

Yeah. Too many damn lights, everything's filthy, and the entire population consists of perverts, hookers, and crack heads.

You've got to admit, it's good for laughs!

Laughs?! I can barely keep a meal down because of all this shit! I've lost count of how many times I've been propositioned. By both woman AND men. And some that looked suspiciously like neither and both. Sick!

So if you hate it so much, why don't you leave? Or just give into your desires and return to Japan?

I... can't. Not yet. I'm... not strong enough.

But you do admit that it's what you want, ne Eiri?

Mnn... maybe.

You REALLY miss him, don't you?

Mnn... I guess I do.

You know you can go back at anytime, ne? He'll take you just as you are.

Iie. I can't do that. It'll be the same shit all over again.

So what are you waiting for?

I want to be stronger, to become a better person. To find peace with my past go that I can move on with my life. Shuichi... he deserves better than what I gave him.

I'm proud of you... at least you have the strength to admit THAT.

Yeah, maybe I am getting stronger after all.

There's hope for you yet.

Maybe... but change takes time. And I've been in this mold for so long, I don't know if it's really possible for me.

I believe in you.

The final words from his conscience startled the novelist. By saying 'I believe in you,' it was as if the writer himself had said 'I believe in myself.'

Another genuine smile graced his face as he contemplated a title for his newest novel.

After another moment to reflect on the theme of his story, Yuki typed in a single word. It was the only word that had the power to express the unique relationship between the blonde writer and the pink-haired singer.

"Gravitation"

TBC...

I don't know... did you like the ending? I thought that it'd be a cute idea for Yuki to publish the story of Gravitation in the format of a romance novel. And because it's about him and Shuichi, it'd be a true story! Then that would mean that I really COULD find them and molest them! fan girl squeal That would be my dream come true! N-E-ways, ONEGAI REVIEW!!! Or else I will go on update strike! Or I'll just pout and cry then get writer's block again. sniff