Sink the Allentown

To todd fan: Hey there todd fan! I'm glad you liked the last chapter! Enjoy the new chapter, and I can hardly wait to read new chapters of "Slugs and Snails", "Little Shop of Mutants", and "X-Men: Evolution, the Musical!"

To Red Witch: Hey there Red Witch! You have the Valor vs. Venom DVD? Awesome! I saw it on Cartoon Network a couple times. That movie was a whole lot better than Spy Troops, don't you think? I mean, in Valor vs. Venom, there was no surfer bum Beach-Head, and the character of Hi-Tech is one of the Malibu Joes in my fics. I liked Hi-Tech from Spy Troops, so I brought him into my fics. Oh yeah, have you heard anything about a new GI Joe series in the works? Anyway, enjoy the new chapter, and I can hardly wait for new chapters of "Memories Are Made of This" and "Valor, Venom, and Other Stuff"!

To Raliena: Hey there Rae! I'm glad you liked the last chapter! Enjoy this new one!

Disclaimer: "I love Cheesy Poofs, you love Cheesy Poofs, if we didn't eat Cheesy Poofs, we'd be lame!" - Eric Cartman, SouthPark

Chapter 8: Unusual Solution!

Joe Headquarters

An assembled group of Malibu Joes and West Coast Misfits stood at a platform with a big American Flag behind it.

"Get the feeling ol' Whithalf watched that 24-hour 'Patton' marathon again?" Jester snickered to Dial-Up. The Japanese communications officer nodded.

"It oes seem to have a strange effect on our leader." Dial-Up nodded. She turned her head toward Jester. "You can get your face away from mine now." Jester shrugged. General Whithalf walked out onto the platform, dressed as the legendary General Patton, complete with hunting crop under his arm. "I knew it."

"Looks like General Whithalf wanted to play dress-up." Rahne giggled.

"Oh brother." Hardcase grumbled. "I knew it! This outfit's getting crazier by the day." Rock 'n' Roll, with a grin, threw a spitball at Hardcase. It hit the Green Beret in the back of the head. "Augh! Rock 'n' Roll! What was that for!" Hardcase yelled at the Green Beret.

"Shhhh! He's starting!" Tommy shushed.

"Men…" General Whithalf started. "…and Ladies…we are heading into an extremely dangerous and unauthorized mission."

"For General Whithalf, handling a sharp object is considered an extremely dangerous and unauthorized mission." Kyle quipped. "Hey!" Kyle yelped as Toshi whapped him upside the head. Whithalf seemed to not hear Kyle's little joke.

"This mission will be full of risks, and the coming battle will be full of dangers. You may lose limbs…"

"Here's hoping Kyle will lose his lips in the coming battle." Toshi grumbled. Kyle glared at the Japanese plasma generator.

"…if you reveal your roles in this mission, you'll end up in big trouble…" Whithalf continued, completely oblivious.

"You hear that, Kyle? Try and keep it closed for all our sakes." Toshi snickered.

"You know your role and shut your mouth!" Kyle snapped. Toshi and Kyle were about to throw punches, but Burner and Fusebox pulled them apart.

"Calm down, you two." Fusebox said. Rock 'n' Roll raised his hand.

"Are you in grade school or something, man?" Hi-Tech asked the machine gunner.

"Was GI Joe this crazy when you fought them in the October Guard, Daina?" Ali asked the blond Czech Joe.

"Yes, Dazzler. They were quite insane." Daina chuckled. "One time, the October Guard tried to capture a group of Joes in Siberia. You want to know how it ended up?" Ali nodded. "It became a snowball fight. I never heard Schrage laugh before that day."

"Who's Schrage?" Ali blinked.

"One of my old comrades in the October Guard. He was an East German soldier. Quiet fellow." Daina smiled as she remembered the East German.

"What happened to the October Guard?" Ali asked.

"After the USSR collapsed, the October Guard drifted apart." Daina sighed sadly.

"Yes, soldier?" Whithalf pointed at Rock 'n' Roll with his hunting crop.

"Man, that last battle was something, sir." The blond machine gunner said. "Our vehicles shorted out. They became deader than a dumpster full of batteries."

"The vehicles weren't the only things that shorted out." Toshi smirked at Kyle. Kyle's electrical powers also made him vulnerable to the Pulse Modulator.

"Why you-!" Kyle broke out of Fusebox's grip and punched out Toshi. The two mutants then started exchanging blows.

"That's right, boys! I see you got that fire in you!" Whithalf grinned. "As for your question soldier, I have a plan for how we're going to beat the Pulse Modulator. I'm going to need some volunteers. Who's with me?" The group of Joes and Misfits steeped forward.

"All right." Whithalf whispered proudly. I could hug these guys right now.

The MalibuMaritimeMuseum, some time later

A shoe policeman, clad in a blue uniform and white helmet, looked up at the old pirate ship of the legendary Bluebeard. It was a grand old ship, with tied up sails and a mermaid on the bow.

"Wow…to be a pirate in those days…only thing that sucked about it was that they didn't allow women on board." The guard chuckled to himself. He then noticed something odd. "Hey what!" He saw a quartet of Joe Tomahawk helicopters fly towards Bluebeard's ship. The guard watched in amazement as several Joes and Longshot jumped on board, hooked ropes onto the ship, and carried it off. Several shore policemen noticed and ran to the scene.

"Hey! Stop!" They exclaimed. They couldn't stop the Joes.

"Federal operatives in pursuit of suspects! We need this vessel!" Ali yelled as the Joes took the ship away. They deposited it in the ocean nearby. As the Joes set up the sails, a certain pilot/comedian was rooting around in the museum downstairs.

"Arr, me hearties!" Jester whooped in the pirate accent as he came up on deck, wearing a pirate captain costume. "Man the bilge pumps! Hoist the main sail! Extend the plank! A…" Jester heard someone thumping a piece of metal into their hand. The pilot noticed Dial-Up doing that, smirking at him.

"What's that you say, Captain Bly?" Dial-Up smirked, referring to the sinister captain who ended up getting kicked off his own ship by his crew. Jester pouted.

"I never get to have any fun!" Jester grumbled and groused as he walked back downstairs. "Hey!" Kyle and Toshi leapt out of the downstairs museum, dressed as pirates, and swordfighting. "Lucky bums!"

Well, well, well! Looks like the Malibu Joes and the West Coast Misfits will always find time for fun! What insanity will happen next? What's Whithalf's plan? Will it walk? Will our heroes save the day? Find out in the next chapter Suggestions needed badly!