Gravity
Part Two

"Where is the next prospect for Hinata-sama to speak with?"

Forcing her hands to stop shaking and her breathing to even out once more took more effort for Hinata than it should have for someone of her age. The way her father was looking straight at Neji, she knew that he wasn't happy with the younger man for speaking out of turn, and she wished that he would look away. The last thing she wanted right now was a fight, especially if she was the cause.

It seemed she was the cause of much of the strife her family was plagued with these days, and the thought truly gave her pain. The last thing she wanted to be was a burden or harbinger of conflict for the people she cared for. However, the things that her elders and even her father asked of her lately... they were things she couldn't, in good conscience, give to them.

She bit her lip, dropping her gaze to the floor when her father shifted and looked at her, completely ignoring his nephew. Her father was the only person to this day who could made her feel seven years old and tiny again, and more worthless than even she had ever considered herself. All of her life, she had strived to become someone stronger, better, claiming that it was for herself that she wanted to change, but some small part of her knew that wasn't entirely true.

Some small part of her had always wanted recognition from someone else. A confirmation somehow, that she wasn't just useless, that she wasn't a failure from the flawless Hyuuga mold. That someone whose praise she had always wanted, was the one person who would never give it to her.

Her lips felt heavy and thick as she murmured, "Please excuse my tardiness. I was being idle in my garden, and-"

"Hinata, sit. We haven't any more time to waste with your useless excuses."

Her expression wavered slightly before she forced a smile, one that she had sat in front of a mirror and practiced for hours until she was certain she could summon it at will. One that she hoped hid how shaking and sad she was inside.

She pressed her clasped hands to her stomach to calm its nervous looping and looked up, her smile trembling but still there. "Of course. I apologize, father."

Making her way to her place silently save for the soft swishing of her kimono, Hinata mentally berated herself for being so noisy. Of course her father wouldn't want to hear any excuses from her. He had made it very clear to her many times in her life that she was nothing more than a nuisance to him, someone he tolerated because her mother had not birthed him a son to raise. She knew that he wished more than anything Neji was his son, and Hinata couldn't find it in her heart to blame him.

Compared to Neji, her weaknesses and faults were blindingly obvious. Where he was a genius, she would always be nothing more than painfully, devastatingly average. He was more powerful, more collected, more intelligent, more... everything.

She almost wondered why he hadn't just gone against the council and named Neji his heir. Hinata would not have begrudged her cousin his rightful place, and she knew her father would have much preferred to groom him in the manner he was attempting to teach his daughter. She was a failure, however, and took much longer to learn things than anyone else.

Longer... so much longer than everyone else.

Inhaling quickly, forcing herself to get control of her emotions, Hinata glanced around the room and tried not to shrink under the pressing gazes of all the people around her. She would never get used to all this attention, this careful scrutiny. Of course, she appreciated all they did for her, and that they pointed out her mistakes and guided her along the right path. There was no way Hinata would ever be able to manage something so tremendous as the responsibility of her clan without her council's help. She simply wasn't intelligent enough for that sort of thing.

She was weak, too, even now, even after trying so hard to change herself. There were times when she believed that Neji had been right all those years ago, when he had told her that fates were decided at birth, and change was impossible no matter how much you tried to believe in yourself. She had certainly given it everything she had in her over the years, and still she remained exactly as she had always been.

Hinata. Just Hinata.

She was startled from her thoughts by her father placing his hand on the table before her and clearing his throat to get everyone's attention.

"Hinata, the council has called this meeting without a prospective husband to discuss a matter of the utmost importance with you. I believe you know how disappointed we have all become with your refusals to accept any man that we place before you as a husband, and we demand to know why."

Her mouth suddenly felt dry and her stomach lurched painfully. So that was it. She really was, after all, nothing more than a disappointment to them all. Lately, she had begun to hope that perhaps she would find a place among them somehow, and that maybe, she would become worthy of her name and title. It seemed she had once more deceived herself.

She wet her lips with the tip of her tongue, forcing herself not to lower her eyes to the table as she wished to. It was impossible for her to look her father in the eyes, but she managed his chin at least, though even that was almost more than she could bear.

"I-I..."

The truth was, Hinata didn't want to marry anyone. It might have been foolish, but if she was going to wed anyone, she wanted to do it because she loved him and he loved her. It was foolish, she realized, and very selfish of her, but she couldn't help it. Whenever talk of matrimony came up she got a sick feeling in her stomach and she couldn't bring herself to promise her heart to a man she knew she did not love. That would be dishonoring the most sacred union of all.

She could feel her father's eyes on her, burning deep paths into what she felt was her very core. It felt like he could see right through her, to all her fears, secrets, and insecurities. Her shoulders began to shake slightly as she though of what he must think of her, this weak, disappointing little girl that he had given so much to, only to have her turn out in this way and slap him in the face for his efforts.

"I..."

Taking a deep breath, Hinata forced herself to look up, and she lost all resolve in that moment. She couldn't exactly read his expression, she wasn't good at that sort of thing, but there was one thing that even she could recognize.

Disgust was lurking in those eyes, so similar to the ones she searched every morning in the mirror, trying to find an answer to why she wasn't good enough.

Hiashi shook his head, finally looking away from daughter and around the room. "As you can see, our head of family cannot even offer us a viable reason as to why she refuses marriage, even though it is obviously the best thing for the clan. I would like to once again like to bring forward the suggestion I voiced at our last private meeting."

Private meeting? So they had been meeting apart from her, trying to find ways to help her become a person they could proudly call their head of family. To think that they had to go to such lengths, all because she wasn't capable of managing herself as anyone else could...

"What suggestion is this?"

The tone of her cousin's voice sent a slight chill down Hinata's spine and she jerked her head up, eyes widening when she took in the expression on his normally impassive face. He was looking at her father with narrowed eyes, his brows arching and slamming together in a frown of the likes she hadn't seen since they were children. His mouth was flattened into a thin, unimpressed line, and for a moment, Hinata's heart actually stumbled.

He looked so angry.

Hiashi met his nephew's stare unflinchingly, apparently unfazed by the severity of the look. If Hinata had been the one to which that glance had been aimed, she knew that she would be perilously close to tears from the intensity of it. Everyone else was so much stronger than she.

"Ah, Neji-kun, I had forgotten that you were away on a mission. The rest of the council met and discussed the possibility of revoking Hinata's status as head of the family should she not choose a husband within one month. It was unanimous."

It felt as though a cold fist had wrapped around her heart and begun to squeeze. She found it difficult to draw a breath, and reached up with one hand, pressing her finger to her lips and trying with all that she had not to start rocking. They didn't want her as head of the family. They wanted to remove her. She was such a failure. Such a disappointment. Such--

"It was not unanimous. I was not present to give proper input at the time, but I will do so now. I am utterly oppossed to the action of removing Hinata-sama from her position. The council disappoints me for making such a decision in my absence," his voice had quieted to barely above a whisper, and his expression did not change.

It was difficult to tell who was the most surprised in the room by Neji's words. For her part, Hinata could do no more than stare numbly toward him as her mind sought to process what was being said.

"Hinata-sama is, by birth, the woman who should lead our family. It is disgraceful to even think of proposing such an idea because the council grows weary of the search for a husband. It is not our place to order the head of family around as if she were a pawn set out merely for our own amusement."

He turned, his cold eyes sweeping across the room and settling on each face in turn. "You should all be ashamed of the manner in which you present yourselves to the head of family."

"Stop." She barely whispered it, eyes brimming with tears.

The sound of Hiashi's palm slamming onto the table made Hinata jump, and she watched helplessly as he leaned forward. "You disgrace us all, Neji-kun. How dare you speak to the council in this manner. Consider yourself dismissed from its ranks."

"Stop."

Neji cast an imperious look toward his uncle. "The only possible inducement I have to remain is Hinata-sama. I will not go quietly."

"Stop!"

All heads whipped to face Hinata as she finally raised her voice, hands clenched into fists at the side of her head as she squeezed her eyes shut and tears streamed down her face. She didn't want this. She didn't want them all to fight, and she didn't want Neji to go away. If only she wasn't such a troublesome person, they would all be getting along happily, and she would be married, and no one would have any cause to fight.

This was all her fault.

Her breath came in quick, uneven gasps as she fought to control herself enough to speak. "I will not... have this arguing... in my presence."

The words sounded feeble to her own ears, and she knew that they carried little weight. However, despite everything, Hinata was the head of this clan. She might not have been suited for it, or good at it, and perhaps she never would be, but if there was ever a time she would use her position to influence others, it was now.

Opening her eyes, hoping they didn't look as helpless as she felt, she lowered her fists to the table and began to speak. "This fighting... it's my fault. I'm to blame for the conflict in my family and for that, I apologize. I do not deserve to be head of family."

No one spoke. They all just watched her silently, possibly too surprised to make a motion.

"However, I am. I am... the head... of this family. I have been negligent in my duties, but that will change now. I will choose a husband and end this fight. As a family, we shouldn't be fighting. I don't want us to fight."

Tears slipped down her cheeks and over her lips, but she did not brush them away. Now, if never again, she would be strong. There was something she needed to do and even if she was scared to death, even if all she wanted to do was curl up into a ball and cry, she would do it.

Neji had been strong enough to say what he wanted to.

She would be, too.

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Thank you to all my kind reviewers! Your comments bolstered me and made me want to write this chapter as quickly as I could. I hope I haven't disappointed you. Please don't lose heart! Things won't be this bad for them forever. The next chapter we'll get to see Neji's reaction to all of this, so please check back soon!