Assigned Seats

Author: Siren of Hell (occasionally my friend Jane)

Rating: This is R for bad, bad words. Please don't read if you're not old enough!

Disclaimer: I own nothing. HP belongs to JKRowling and some publishing company, BtVS belongs to Joss Wheldon and some other really rich TV people, and Mutant Enimy and Fox and many, many more. Simpsons(which is mentioned in passing) belongs to Matt Grogien and I think that's it..

Summary: Harry Potter/Buffy the Vampire Slayer crossover. Hogwarts has a new DADA professor, she's not exactly conventional... and what's more! She's determined to make a couple of her students realise something about themselves.

Timeline: Three years after s7 of Buffy, and 6th year for HP and gang.

Spoilers: HP-up to Order of the Phoenix, Btvs – up to s7, Ats – up to first/second episode of s5

Pairings: HP/DM, BS/A(us), and probably RW/HeG and WR/SS

Warning Slash

Dedication: To Janey, my inspiration and all that...

Author's Note : For the purpose of this fic Angel and Spike do love each other (In a violent love hate kinda way). Not very much romantically but in a familyish way, but with some bits of romance. What can I say, they come from a fucked up family.

Chapter 7. Doesn't it just make you wanna drool?!

Their truce had worked. Well, at least for the five minutes after they had made it, which was at about the time when they reached Transfiguration. Thankfully McGonagall was not yet there, the pair didn't particularly want to fight of the bombardment of questions about their bondage that was sure to come, as they had done from the students in the halls. But that also meant she was not there to break up their fight. The fight which was, of course, inevitable.

Harry of course had wanted to sit with his two best friends, Ron and Hermione. Draco had plainly refused, saying he didn't mind if they didn't sit with his lackeys (well... he didn't use that exact word...) but so long as they didn't sit with 'The Dream Team,' as he referred to Harry's friends, he said he was happy.

That just pissed Harry off, and seconds later they were on the floor, getting at it... well not IT it, but, trying to get a good hit in with their... restrictions. They were still going at it when McGonagall entered the classroom five minutes later.

McGonagall tried to flick her wand to part them, but was quickly disappointed. Several spells later the two rivals were still on the floor and McGonagall was starting to definitely getting wet... all that extra magical exertion at her age was really making her sweat. She realised that she would have to resort to physical measures and leant down and scooped Harry up into her arms. She didn't think Mr. Malfoy would have taken too kindly to such an action, probably would have hurt his overly large ego, so she thought it best to pick up Harry, that and the fact that Harry was just the slightest bit smaller than Mr. Malfoy. 'Who wants to make their job harder', thought Minerva to herself.

The class gasped at her hidden strength, but Harry seemed to be heavier than she had originally thought, his weight almost making her drop him. It was then that she noticed that she had not only lifted Harry but Draco as well, since they were attached at the wrist. Her total shock caused her to drop both boys.

Harry yelped as he was dropped three feet onto a soft body. The fall had not particularly hurt, it had simply startled him. He heard a groan, and noticed that the soft body underneath him was Draco. The fight was immediately forgotten as Harry unwillingly savoured the feel of Draco's soft flesh beneath his.

Draco was having the same problem with one alternate factor. The fall had hurt a bloody hell of a lot. Harry's crushing weight falling on his did not help in the slightest. But he found that despite the pain Harry on top of him was not exactly a bad thing. Sure he'd prefer to be on top but he could stand being submissive, for a while anyway. Especially if it all felt like this. The body on top of him was warm and comfortable. Lighter than it should have been though. Draco could feel Harry's ribs poking him. He made a mental note to himself to get Harry to eat more in the future. Draco, although proud of his cool exterior, could feel a slow blush coming to his normally pale cheeks. His eyes widened, and his breath was coming in a slightly sporadic manner... Harry was squirming on his lap. He almost moaned aloud at the sensations of Harry moving on top of him...

Harry also looked quite flustered, but still took his time to scramble of Draco. He didn't want to hurt him, especially since he looked like he was in some serious pain, what with his heavy breathing and the groans that Harry had heard rumbling in Draco's impressive chest... 'Oh my...' thought Harry, 'did I just think that his chest was impressive?' Harry didn't know why he felt slightly disappointed at the thought of getting off of Draco, yet he decided he also didn't want to obviously linger as that would have initiated the suspicions of McGonagall, as well as his friends... or should he say Hermione. Seeing as Ron quite enjoyed to live in oblivion. When both Harry and Draco were standing, neither could keep eye contact with the other, Harry looking at his shoes while shuffling his feet. Draco on the other hand was proudly looking around the room, daring anyone to challenge him, or Harry now, he supposed, as they were joined.

McGonagall looked ready to kill.

"Detention! Both of you, for fighting in class. Mr. Potter, I would have expected more from a student in my own house... and Mr. Malfoy, I'm sure that Professor Snape will be equally disappointed. Now, tell me, what have you done here," she pointed towards the chain which was gently swaying between their joined wrists. "Did Mr. Weasley get a spell wrong, perhaps?"

Ron's mouth gaped in outrage, he looked like a crimson coloured goldfish. Before he could object the Professor's claim Hermione, seeing his anger, stepped in.

"Well you see, Professor, they're being punished." Hermione started.

"Punished," McGonagall gasped in shock, "by who? Surely not Albus. Severus would never be so stupid. Who on Earth?"

"It was that crazy American. My father told me all Americans were idiots. I never really believed him until now," Draco pondered.

"Oh, shut up, you git," Hermionie scolded. "She's not crazy, in fact I think she's bloody brilliant! If there is one way to get you two to stop fighting, it's this! I'm just surprised nobody thought of it before, even me. Though I don't totally agree on the other thing she said... That was just kind of disturbing..." Hermione shuddered.

"Given the circumstances, I'm not really sure I even want to ask..." McGonagall said wearily.

One Lavender Brown, always the gossip queen, decided to enlighten the innocent Professor.

"Well she thinks that Harry and Malfoy are secretly in love with each other and that they want to boink each others brains out, possibly until they pass out from exhaustion, only they don't know it yet," she said, rather tactlessly. "And after some careful consideration and conversation with my friends," she gestured towards Patil, "we wholeheartedly agree. I mean, how HOT would that be! Doesn't it just make you wanna drool?!"

Ron looked like he was about to be sick, that or his intestines were about to explode. Professor McGonagall looked as if she had put her hand on an overly large bug, and it's insect fluids had just splattered all over her bare skin, her eyes looked ready to POP! right out of her eyesockets.

"Thank you ever so much for that girls," the usually calm woman managed, with a healthy dollop of what could basically be seen as typical British humour. She closed her eyes, warding off the extremely vivid images that the topic brought into mind. "Perhaps now everyone can take their seats and we can get on with the lesson," she continued, slightly more confidently.

Many of the students sighed, their excitement over for the moment. Little did they know that it was just about to get good.

"Albus Dumbledore, is it?" the black man sitting across from the headmaster asked.

Severus sneered. He should show more respect.

"Let's get right down to business. My name is Charles Gunn. I work for the Law Firm Wolfram and Hart. I understand that you currently have guardianship of one Draconis Malfoy. Is that correct?"

Dumbledore looked rather shocked, which is difficult to imagine, as he normally his only expression pertained that damn twinkle.

"Yes, I do indeed have custody of Draco, and I hope you do not mind me inquiring as to what exactly this has got to do with anything?" he asked confused.

"Well my client has recently discovered his brothers disappearance and wishes for the custody of his nephew."

"Nephew? I'm afraid to inform you that Lucius Malfoy is an only child. He has no siblings."

"That is where you are incorrect. Lucius Malfoy had a half brother; his mother was a muggle. He had lived in America all his life. I merely came to inform you of the change, the papers have already been submitted and are likely to be passed by the ministry any day now. Mr. Malfoy is requested for the Christmas holidays. Someone will be there to pick him up from the London Station. And if that's all I should be off, I have a long flight back home."

Gunn quickly exited the office, leaving no time for the men inside to reply. He could feel the tension building up in the room, and knew he was lucky to have escaped unscathed. He frowned lightly, the old man had been right. Lucious Malfoy had no siblings. He hated lying to them, but it was a special job for Angel and it had to be done. Gunn was the only person he trusted enough to get it done correctly.

Gunn sighed. He really did have a long flight home.

Severus Snape sneered inside the office.

"Lucious Malfoy has no siblings!" he said firmly, "If he did I would know about it."

"I know Severus, no one is blaming you, except maybe yourself. Now the question is why does Lucius want is son back so badly?" Dumbledore wondered.

"Are we certain it is Lucius doing this?" Snape asked.

"Well I can say with a fair degree of certainty that it is. Who else could possibly need Draco?"

Snape still did not look convinced.

"I suppose..."

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