Seth sat helplessly, watching Summer perched on the other sofa mercilessly kicking his coffee table. He figured that he had probably given the wrong answer when she asked if he wanted to start to 'figure stuff out'. He wasn't quite sure how the table had become involved but he was pretty sure it couldn't stand the heat.
Seemed a little much, as far as he was concerned they were together – Summer had kissed him – and everything was pretty good. Apparently that was not how things stood.
"Summer, please. The coffee table can only take so much of your attentions."
"What do you want me to do? Kick you?"
"We can always buy a new table." He acceded.
"I'm sorry." She took a deep breath. "It's not your Mom's fault and it is kinda her table. I'm just so sick of you and thinking you can just make everything go away because you want it to." She spouted.
"But you kissed me, Summer!"
"A kiss is just a kiss, Cohen. And I don't want just a kiss from you. But I don't know if I want to be with someone who runs away from me whenever things are hard. A kiss isn't commitment, sex isn't a commitment. 'I love you' isn't really a commitment – they're just like words and actions and—"
He swept forward, lips capturing her own for a soft kiss, gaze surfacing to her eyes. "I love you."
"Stop it." She swatted him away. "I'm trying to be like sincere here and you're completely ignoring me.
He backed away to his designated sofa, hands in the air. "Sorry, I'm sorry. I'm listening."
"Good because you're a jerk and I shouldn't even be here. I should like be in some villa with Zach eating Italian food and having lots of sex."
"We could be doing that right here."
"Cohen!"
"Okay, okay. I'm really sorry, Summer. Listening – I promise." He sealed it with a nod and after a moment she continued.
"I think we need to, like… Talk." She suggested.
"In case you hadn't noticed, Sum, we're sort of already doing that." He observed.
"About our relationship, assface."
"Uh, oh, okay."
"So, let's start with the letter. A letter? This is not the medieval times, Cohen. You could have at least been man enough to call and tell me you were leaving. Even a phone call would have been better."
"I knew I couldn't go through with it if I told anyone. You would have beaten some sense into me – literally."
"Too damn right I would have. It was stupid… and hurtful."
"I never meant to hurt you Summer, that was never what I wanted." His hand reached out, long fingers gently stroking the exposed skin where rings would usually have been.
"I know." She acknowledged. "But you did." He face was changeable and delicate. "I just, I just don't understand why Ryan leaving made you leave me."
"It's not that Ryan was leaving—" He hesitated.
"What?" She prodded, fingers curling around his.
"It's stupid." He admitted quietly, like a little boy, eyes ducked.
She bit her lip, heart breaking for him. He looked so lost. "You can tell me, Seth. You can tell me anything." Her voice was low and coaxing.
"It's just… Mom and Dad just let him walk away; they didn't even put up a fight like they would have for me. So maybe I left because I knew they'd fight for me and if that meant fighting for Ryan then they would do that too and good, because Ryan deserves to be here – with us. He's my best friend, Summer… He's my only friend." His voice broke, quietly.
"Oh, Cohen, maybe Ryan was your first friend, and he's like your best friend – but you have other friends now, Cohen. You do. And you have me."
"But Ryan's not just my friend – I don't want this to sound totally lame or anything but he's my family. It's like I lost a brother and you couldn't understand that because you don't have one… Not because I didn't trust you enough..."
"You could have told me what you were doing, tried to explain—" Their hands were firmly grasped together now although he still refused to meet her eye.
"But it was so lame."
"I might have come with you though." Her voice was thick.
"Why? So your Father could hate me even more?"
"Because I love you, dumbass." She traced fingertips along his face, forcing him to meet her gaze. Her voice soft and dreamy but determined.
"Oh, yeah. Really feeling it." He chuckled uncomfortably.
"I do." She smiled softly.
"You do." He returned almost coyly.
"I do." She nodded, bringing their other hands together until all four were clasped in her lap. "Even though I probably shouldn't after what you did to Zach."
"Hey, I didn't do anything to him—" Seth protested.
"You practically ran the poor guy out of town!" She pointed out.
"Only a little." He lifted a hand from hers; holding two fingers very close together – just a little space between.
For a while they sat in relative silence, Seth softly bobbing their hands to an invisible beat.
"Why Zach?"
"Because I didn't know if you were coming back," she squinted "and I didn't want to be with you if you did."
He nodded, a sincerity spreading over his features darkly. "I don't blame you. I mean, I did, but I was pretty much an ass—"
"And creepy." She added.
"—And creepy. And inappropriate – but it's just like when I ran away in the first place. I just kinda throw myself into things." He apologised.
"You're enthusiastic." She patted his shoulder.
"But you're wrong."
"About?"
"The chase." He clarified. "That's not what I want, that's just what I know best. I have years of practise in wanting you Summer – but not very much of actually having you. But that's what I want."
"Oh my God," she broke into a grin, "you're just so cute. I'm still kind of mad at you – but so cute."
She leant forward briefly touching her lips to his – their first kiss since the conversation had started. She pulled away only a few centimetres.
"I don't want to be with anyone else." He mumbled into her smile.
"Neither do I." She agreed.
"Okay then."
"Okay."
Summer's smiled cracked, erupting into laugher. He joined her, awkward and unintentional contortions of his mouth – despite not knowing what he was laughing at. Mostly he was just laughing with her.
Finally he gave up, grinning. "What? What are we even laughing at?"
"Do you realise that was like our first proper 'relationship' talk?"
"Hey, I guess it was. How grown up are we?" He beamed.
"Very." She nodded, giggles threatening at the corners of her lips. Eventually they subsided, her palm lay flat against his cheek and they were eye to eye. She swallowed.
"So you really love me?"
"Really." He breathed, caught up in the dark kaleidoscope of her eyes.
"So…" she teased, tracing fingers up and down his chest, "you wanna make out?"
"For like the last half hour!"
