Ally gave one disgusted sigh at her TV and clicked it off with her remote. Confined to her bed for over a week, she was losing it without anything to do. She tossed aside her blanket, hoisted the cast on her broken left leg and started moving.
"Oh no, you don't!" William Collins, her current boyfriend, carried a tray with soup and a sandwich into her bedroom. "I promised your mother you were not leaving this bed." He lifted her legs, placed them on the bed and covered her back up.
"You better start being more afraid of me than my mother!" She glared at him with the ferocity of a stuffed lion as he took care of her. William just grinned as he stirred her soup.
"At least you lost the frame work in your mouth." He had to admit he loved taking care of her as Jennie McBeal, his potential mother-in-law, went out and took care of things. Renee and Elaine were in and out a lot too as well as John, Billy, Georgia and Richard. Elaine brought the gossip, John brought the happenings and Georgia sneaked in pizza.
"I still smell pizza in here!" William looked around her bedroom.
"And I still say there's a pizza place down the block." Ally lied and made sure the empty pizza boxes, which Renee had sneaked in for her, were out of sight.
"Oh," William continued. "Here are your pencils, spiral notebooks, erasers and a pencil sharpener." He held up a plastic bag from the Office Depot. She made a small cheer. "You're not going to try working."
"No," She lied again. "I just want to feel I'm doing something other than just laying here."
"Okay." He kissed her. "Don't forget to take your tranquilizers when you finish eating." He picked up her breakfast dishes.
"I'm taking care of them now." She grinned innocently then as he turned his back tossed them across the room. She was not falling asleep during the day to be up awake all night! With them gone, she sipped her soup and pulled out her supplies. Sharpening her pencil, she rested the notebook on her good leg, and began writing in her spiral notebook.
"It was a time of myth and legend, a time of gods and mortals. This is the story of the beautiful princess..." Erase that. "…The beautiful virgin-princess Ally..." She grinned a brief mischievous smile.
PART TWO
It was a time of myth and legend, a time of gods and mortals. This is the story of the beautiful virgin princess Ally and her search for a husband. Her father, King George of the McBeal clan ruled the ancient but vast kingdom of Arborea to the south of Aesgaard and east of Avalon. Knowing his daughters liaisons with four famous warriors, he called the four to his kingdom to choose from among them to be her husband. The main hall was being decorated for the ceremony as Vizier John the Biscuit of Poughkeepsie lead in the nervous four. He announced them to his king.
"My lord," he began. "May I introduce proud Greg of the Butters Clan of Nemedia, noble Ronald of Cheanie from Avalon, handsome Billy the son of Thomas from Olympia and William the Thunderer from Collinwood of Aesgaard. All noble and powerful champions of the realm."
King George glanced to Queen Jennie as Princess Ally sat between them and grinned bashfully at her past loves. At her feet, Richard the Jester strummed his lyre and cracked with jokers.
"Hit their heads together and you can hear the ocean." He announced as he shook his jester's staff, a wand with his doll-like head and bells on it. As usual, King George hit him with his staff.
"Good warriors!" King George rose to his feet. "My daughter shall have a husband, but only one is fit to be the husband of a virgin princess..."
"Virgin?" Richard cracked. "Who are we kidding?" He got hit again.
" ...To test the mettle of these would-be champions." King George continued. "I have had my wise Vizier come up with a challenge of harsh severity. The only survivor shall be her husband!"
"Are you kidding?" Richard cracked again. "These guys don't understand up and down." He got hit again.
"Proud warriors..." Vizier John the Biscuit of Poughkeepsie started. "Forty score and seven moons ago, the sacred amulet of the Caged Fish was stolen from the immortal King Lear, King George's ancestor, by the dark armies of the witch-goddess Georgia of the Superstition Mountains. For years, all attempts to retrieve it have met with disaster. Only he who returns it shall be the husband of Ally and heir to the throne."
The great hall gasped. No one ever returned from the Superstition Mountains alive or in one piece. Many more did not return at all. It was said ghosts who terrorized travelers haunted the mountain range and strange creatures lurked in its valleys.
"For the hand of a virgin princess," Billy called. "I would eat from the table of the dead."
"So you know the Royal Cook." Richard was hit once more.
"Then go powerful warriors and may Zeus himself look over you." King George beamed over his beautiful daughter. Ally grinned mysteriously as her father solved her own dire predicament. She looked out from her father's shadow as her favorite four beaus departed ready for action. Near her, Richard the jester stood up once more.
"Tuonetar, goddess of the dead," he replied. "Open your gates for four more victims of your daughter Georgia. May Hades have pity on their four thick muscle-bound hides."
Ally took her father's staff and hit him herself!
PART THREE
Greg, William, Billy and Ronald had pitched their tents in the foothills to the Superstition Mountains as night approached. The wind whipped through them as their tents flapped in the breeze. Their campfire cracked and stoked itself into a blaze as they stared at each other. It was the first time all of them had gathered for a common mission and they all eyed each other distrustfully. William was known for his berserker rages and Ronald was reputed to go to unethical means to get what he wanted. Billy was a soldier and a prince himself with decorations and Greg was known to dabble in mystical practices. They scanned each other for weaknesses as they yearned to out do each other. It was die or kill for Ally's hand now.
"So," William wrapped meat, vegetables and cheese in bread as he looked at Ronald. "How did you fair at the battle against the Cimmerians?"
"We won."
"I heard they tried burning you alive." Greg ate only herbs and roots.
"After they caught you burning their town." Billy added.
"One haystack is not a town." Ronald claimed. "How was I supposed to know where the fire would go? And what about you and that hammer? Stolen from the cave of Thor, isn't it?"
"He gave it to me in a vision." William glanced through the fire.
"At least I never carried off riches that weren't mine." Billy added to the debate.
"Oh, shut up, Thomas!" Cheanie stood up. "What are you doing here? You have girls up and down the North Sea!"
"At least mine are women..." Billy implied an insult. Swords and weapons were drawn as they jumped to their feet. Billy pulled out a long cutlass given him by his father, the King of Olympia far to the south. "Ally is to be mine! I am her first love."
"And her first heartbreak!" Greg snarled at his rival.
"Shut up!" William pounded his hammer to the ground and set off thunder in the sky. "When I wake at daybreak, I will be gone without you idiots, and the next one to get in my way will get his head bashed in! From now, everyone for himself." He glared at Ronald. "Or herself."
"Heathen!" Ronald remembered he once wore a dress to escape a bounty on his head.
"My, my, my, my..." A female voice watched them arguing through an enchanted pool of water from afar. "Trouble among the troops."
Georgia whisked her images away as she tread through the halls of her castle. Cleaved and cut out of the caves and side of a ravine high in the mountains, it was cold and damp and homey for her needs. Dressed in scant leather decorated with bones and antlers, she dragged a long blood red cape behind her as her mystical eyes peered out the window. She kicked a skull on her floor into her sacrificial flame.
"Should I kill them together, or separately?" She asked her shadow. It shrugged at her under its own power.
"You're right," she mumbled. "Separately." She glanced over her wall of treasures. Some of them were swords with severed hands still stuck to them, or amulets with ripped from the necks of her victims. Her mantelpiece was a desiccated ribcage with a cutlass through it.
"Get back here!" She noticed her shadow sneaking off. It comically tiptoed back as if it wasn't really leaving.
"Maybe I'll eat them barbecued this time." Georgia pulled a recipe book entitled "To Serve Man." In tiny letters, it read "Printed by the Twilight Zone Press."
"No, last time I ate barbecued I had heartburn for three weeks." She groused. "And those Chinese mystics, I was hungry again five minutes later. Ooooooh, a recipe for kielbasa! I haven't had German in months, and William should be just prime enough!" She laughed as her shadow disbelievingly shook its head and sat down.
PART FOUR
Greg woke up alone as he noticed the other three tents were gone. One of them had even taken his horse. Commiserated over the theft, he packed his belongings and headed for the peak of Dragonfang, the highest mountain in the Superstition Mountains. Continuing the path of the others, he tried to tell which one had taken his horse. Just as he reached a bluff, he heard screams for help.
"Damsel!" He called. "Where are you!" He charged at great speed off the cliff and landed between the rocks. Racing between cliffs at ten and twelve feet high, he heard the echoing calls still coming. He jumped lower into a crevasse and noticed the large maw of a cave open before him. A female voice echoing from it was still calling for help as he plunged into the depths of the earth. His heightened senses led the way as he ran under low ceilings and down a long passageway. At the end of a long tunnel, he emerged in a room lit by torches. In a rock alcove sealed by bars, he saw a beautiful Nubian maiden.
"My fair damsel..." Greg smiled into her brown eyes imprisoned behind tarnished iron bars. "Who are you and what keeps you prisoner down here?"
"I am Renee…" She beamed at his steely grin. "A princess from your past kept prisoner here for ages gone by never to see the light of the sun."
"Who is this jailer?" Greg pulled a curved dagger from his armor. He noticed Renee looking up to the ceiling of the cavern. He glanced back the way he came and noticed white pillars flanking the passage opening he had come through. They looked like the long legs of a mighty statue over fifty feet tall but then they stirred. High among them, the witch-goddess Georgia smiled and waved playfully in her gigantic form.
"Zounds!" Greg felt heavy binds overtake him as her thick pillar-like fingers wrapped tightly around him and buried him into the palm of her hand. He felt her grasp squeeze him as she bounced him off the rock ceiling to stun him and then catch him bouncing back toward her open mouth. It was just like catching a peanut. Georgia the mad goddess closed her lips over the brave warrior and swallowed him fighting for his life down into her body. One loud gulp and Renee knew it was over.
"Ugh!" Georgia choked and pounded her chest. "Remind me to unshell the next one."
"You promised to let me go if I screamed for help." Renee reminded her.
"I lied." Georgia flashed her psychotic little grin.
PART FIVE
Ronald of Cheanie continued riding his horse as he led Greg's horse. It was carrying his supplies up the mountain so he could be more comfortable on his. Dragonfang was within his approach and Georgia's castle was his as he left the horses and silently wandered in alone. Scouting the gigantic edifice, he noticed a window not far from the rocky parapet he was on. He tossed a line and scurried up it. The Caged Fish amulet would soon be his and she would never miss it. He would be in and out before she noticed.
The inside of her castle was laid out for both normal people and giants. Giant shelves were balconies and tables were both floors and platforms while felt like Jack the Giant-Killer in this giant fantasy ground. The vast room seemed empty, but then he noticed movement. A tuft of blonde hair bobbed over the top of a three-story chair as Georgia the witch-goddess remained distracted by whatever she had her attention to at the moment. Her back to him, she was writing in her book and munching on huge cherries larger than pumpkins. The knife on the table she used to cut slices of cheese was ten feet long as she continued wrapped in her work. On the far wall, Georgia's living shadow looked as if it were pacing nervously. It seemed to notice him, look at her and then pretended not to notice in order to keep from revealing his existence.
Ronald grinned at his bravado as he ascended stairs carved out of wall decorations up to a shelf and then past huge twelve-foot tall tomes and spell books amidst giant charms and artifacts built from the remains of dead warriors before him. He then realized two things. He did not know what the Caged Fish looked like or where it was. He wondered where it was as he stepped back, but the huge pine knothole he stepped on was sliding through the shelf under his weight. He gripped at the edges of the hole rising up around himself as he slipped through and clutched its crunching wood pulp. The huge splinters cracked under his hands as he dropped into the spoon in Georgia's cherry bowl on the shelf behind the giant witch goddess. Ronald began fearing he'd be taken up in another handful of these great berries, but Georgia hadn't even looked up even as the loose pine knot rolled across her table in front of her. Continuing her writing, she just instinctively took it without a second thought and tossed it up without watching where it landed.
Ronald watched the barrel-sized knothole coming after him. It hit the handle of the spoon he was sitting in and flung him into the air. He must have flown up a hundred feet, a mere seven feet to Georgia's mighty height, and then started to drop from the air. He looked straight down wondering where he was going to land. His eyes peered straight down through the top of the witch-goddess's eternal garb into Georgia's cleavage and realized that if he landed there that she'd surely know he was in her castle. At least, it looked like soft spot!
Georgia, however, moved her head, tilted it up and opened her mouth to his descending form. She already knew he was present! Cheanie screamed as her gullet opened like a small cave for him and then closed up over him. The narrow opening of her throat widened before him and he found himself sliding through the soft putrid passage to be forced by her godly interior to her stomach.
"Greg, is that you?"
Georgia flinched a bit and twisted her head for the presence descending deep within her neck for down inside her mighty body. She cut another piece of cheese and poured a ten foot tall bottle of wine to drink. She massaged her neck as she documented the incident in her spell book.
"I no longer seem to have to go after victims. These idiots are now coming to me..." She wrote in blood.
PART SIX
William had briefly left the Superstition Mountains for the Elysian Fields. The land was filled with altars and temples to all the known gods, but there was only one in which he was really interested. It was built of marble and solid granite and pillars shaped like twelve-foot tall nude female divinities supported its front. Two huge granite pots burning with eternal flame lighted the interior. The center was a huge statue of another nude goddess stretched out over the length of the temple and the tip of her head holding up the ceiling.
"Goddess Elaine," William bowed before the graven image. "Daughter of Balder and Aphrodite, I seek a boon from you. Tell me how to defeat the witch-goddess Georgia that I might win the hand of the virgin princess Ally."
"Virgin?" A voice came out of nowhere. "And Shiva sleeps with a teddy bear."
Elaine was laying on top of her statue in almost the same pose as the mighty statue carved in her likeness. She raised her head and slipped off before the mortal warrior. Her skirts billowed as she dropped and her silver arraignments jingled the theme of a lullaby.
"Why bother with a mortal bride when you can have me?" She tried to tempt him with her vivacious demeanor and warm welcome.
"The princess has my heart and none other." William answered.
"But aren't I more beautiful?"
"Ally is a descendant of Helen of Troy."
"I could make you a god."
"Who wants to live forever?"
"I don't wear underwear." Elaine's lips drifted closer to the warrior's own. She almost had him.
"But I am Thor's champion on Earth." William pushed away. "I am almost your cousin."
"Big deal." Elaine tempted him even harder. "Hades married his niece, Zeus his own sisters..." She watched William push away even more. "What does Ally have that I don't?"
"It's what she hasn't." William continued. "She's not related to the witch-goddess Georgia."
"Crud!" Elaine kicked the base of her statue, exhaled with a disgusted pout and then hesitantly relented as she turned to William.
"Georgia was taught her magicks by the underworld gods of the Aztecs; she has no emotions. She is cold and ruthless and without emotion. Warm her stony heart and you may defeat her." She spoke from her godly senses.
"Thank you, faerie-goddess of frivolity." William clenched his hammer and stormed out to his horse. Elaine watched him a minute as she pouted against her huge marble likeness.
"Thank you Georgia for killing another potential relationship!" She rolled her narrowed eyes and screamed to the heavens for every other immortal listening.
PART SEVEN
As Billy approached, he noticed Greg and Ronald's horses outside Georgia's massive edifice unattended. It looked like a bad omen as if they had gone in and not come out. He looked around for William's mount and wondered if he would be arriving soon to find his horse standing as well.
Sighting a rope hanging from outside a window, Billy looked around once more as he climbed up and through the window. He saw nothing in sight as dropped to floor level and then tilted his head up to giant furniture and the remains of both human and giant scattered about him. He felt as if he had been shrunk down in these massive surroundings. Everything was three and four times bigger from the furniture to the food. He stole a huge cherry from a bowl and cut giant-sized pit out of it while he scanned his surroundings. The walls were decorated in offensive severed body parts, occult symbols and anatomical sketches. What looked like a balcony had to be a shelf; maybe the Caged Fish amulet was there!
Springing ahead, he scurried over some books as large as two beds pushed together and then up a pencil to a lower shelf. The route was perfectly laid out as if it had been prepared for him. There was even a set of stairs his size as he climbed up.
The top steps cracked under his weight and cracked under his weight. Clawing at the shelf of treasures, Billy felt himself slide through a length of pipe waiting for him under the table. It seemed he was sliding to the room underneath as water lined the way for him to slide a bit more conveniently along his path. A sharp bend and he saw light and then the bars of a cage!
"How do you like my mouse trap?" A titanic blonde figure towered over him in an emerald and gold dress and slammed the door closed on him and lifted him up to see. Billy peered out through the bars as the cage was hoisted up fifty feet off the ground. His captor's blue eyes appeared as magnificent globes of azure jade encased in white marble. The contracting of her irises as she studied his miniscule form was fascinating to behold if not frightening for him while he feared his eminent fate.
"You tell Georgia the witch-goddess she will never eat me." Billy roared. "I will slice myself out from in her."
"I am Georgia." She placed her hand on her hips as she posed proudly. "And I won't eat you yet. Someone I ate is not agreeing with me." She felt a bit nauseous as she rubbed her abdomen and sat down in a giant chair. She picked up a twelve-foot tall test tube and poured some pills into her drink, which began fizzing.
"You are Georgia, the devourer of warriors?" Billy couldn't believe it. "You are far more beautiful than I imagined."
"Save it." Georgia drank her stomachache potion. "Everyone falls in love with me before I fillet them."
"No, I mean it." Billy was mooning over all fifty feet of her shapely curves and valleys and dreamed of getting lost in them. "You're are a vision of beauty. I can't believe you are not the goddess of love over the crazy Elaine."
"You really mean it?" Georgia grinned like a little girl as she played with her blonde locks. "I mean, you think I'm prettier than Elaine? Than Helen of Troy?"
"Over Aphrodite herself." Billy showed how much a charmer he was as Georgia squealed in delight and ran her fingers through her hair.
"You stay right there." She grinned as never had before. "Wait till you see me in my other dress!" Her feet thundered down the hall as Billy peered out through the bars of his cage.
"Do not keep me waiting, my beloved!" He called out then slowly peered over the interior of the cage holding him.
"Okay, Thomas," He asked himself. "You got a giant fifty-foot tall blonde in love with you. What are you going to do next?"
PART EIGHT
William slowed his horse as he noticed the three abandoned horses near the rope dangling from a window. It looked bad for him as he realized that the witch-goddess must have plucked off the three of them ahead of him as they all entered the same window. Determined not to make the same mistake, he followed the length of the mile long castle until he came to the cliff side it had been chipped from out of the mountain. The mist of the waterfall falling so close renewed his vigor as he crafted his own rope and slipped down into a lower window. His hammer by his side, he strided in unafraid and hoped he was as just as good a giant-killer as his patron god.
He landed on a balcony overlooking a much larger chamber. It was ten flights down to the floor of what looked like a bedroom. Georgia's bed was as vast as a plain and in as disarray as the Stygian battlefields. He jumped off, bounced three times across its surface and landed on his feet as he charged through the castle looking for the Caged Fish amulet.
"Collins!"
William whirled around as Billy came out of the shadows. He wasn't hurt, nor was he in armor. He was smiling ear to ear.
"Billy, my friend." William clutched his shoulder. "You are alive. Help me to kill Georgia and I will defend your life afterward. Where are Ronald and Greg?"
"They are dead." Billy admitted. "Long consumed by the witch-goddess, but their tortures were brief and mine will be forever. I have consented to marry Georgia."
"Billy!" William shook him. "Are you out of your ever-loving mind! I must save you from yourself."
"I love her."
"But she's the daughter of Loki and Hecate." William continued. "She's Hitler in a dress, a blonde Genghis Khan, Attila with a fashion sense, Dracula with a sense of whimsy. Nostradamus didn't see her coming! She drinks blood and eats people. She sleeps with the dead and confides with demons. She spreads famine and pestilence and drowns puppies and kittens. She's not a nice person!"
"Nobody's perfect." Billy grinned like a love struck schoolboy. "You just don't know her. Deep down she's a scared little girl."
"That's because she eats them too!"
"William, my friend." Billy picked up a large crystal ball with fish swimming in it. "This is the Caged Fish amulet. Take it from us as a wedding present to you and Ally."
"This is it?" William lifted the heavy thing. "I thought it was an amulet."
"It is to Georgia in her godly size." Billy looked at the fish swimming inside. "To us, it's an aquarium. The red one is named Rosebud."
"Billy!" Georgia's voice echoed through the walls, but not as loud as it once did, nor with the terrifying vigor it once possessed. "Dinner's almost ready!"
"I made her into a vegetarian." Billy grinned as Georgia emerged now shrunk to their size and finally merged in sync with her shadow. He kissed her. "No more eating people."
"Is your friend staying for dinner?" She dried her hands on her apron. "We're having salad, Brussels sprouts and stuffed peppers."
"I really must be going." William felt things had gone too weird for him. "Billy, may the gods shine on you." He turned to leave with the Caged Fish, then hesitated and turned back. "Did you say stuffed peppers?"
PART NINE
King George and Queen Jennie and their daughter, the virgin princess Ally, sat bored as they watched Richard the jester trying to entertain them. He hadn't been funny for several weeks now and King George was losing his sense of humor as Richard in his tights scuffed and scooted before them as he pretended to be fighting a wind.
"Your highness," Vizier John the Biscuit of Poughkeepsie leaned over. "He hasn't been funny since he bought that material from the Great Seinfeld."
"You're right." George pounded his staff. "Kill him!"
"No wait!" Richard began doing a man in a shrinking box.
"But, darling," Queen Jennie interrupted. "Everybody loves a mime."
"No, everybody loves a clown." George corrected her. "Everybody hates a mime."
"Father," Ally looked over. "A mime is a horrible thing to waste."
"Very well," King George looked down on Richard the Jester. "Make him a eunuch."
"That's great!" Richard grinned. "I can do eunuch. What's a eunuch?"
"You don't want to know." A guard whispered to Richard, but then John the Vizier came over and whispered in his ear. Richard showed he understood as his grin gave way to fright and his eyes went wild with fear.
"Kill me!" He dove for the feet of his ruler. "Anything but a eunuch! Just kill me!" The sounds of cheers rang out gradually accompanied by cries of glee. Voices outside the castle screamed that William was back from his quest. Trumpets sounded and horns were blown as the party invaded the great hall. Richard stood with a grin.
"I think I found my new best friend!" He mentioned as the doors parted and William entered with the Caged Fish in both hands. Ally clenched her fist and jerked her arm back in a silent subdued cheer.
"Yes!" She cried out as John the Vizier instructed two servants to take the holy relic and return it back to its empty mount in the middle of the room.
"William of Aesgaard," King George stood. "You have won the right to be heir to the throne. Was the quest a hard one?"
"Your majesty," William spoke as the crowds of people listened. "Greg and Ronald lost their lives, and Billy assigned himself to a fate worse than death. He domesticated the witch-goddess."
"He should have chose death." Richard put his arm around William as if they were buddies. William glanced at him then kneeled before Ally. As he kissed her hand, she rose and embraced him.
"My daughter, the virgin princess, shall finally be married." King George called out.
"Um, father," Ally sheepishly looked up. "About this virgin business…"
PART TEN
In the real world, no one recalled gods and people who ate other people were arrested by the rules of modern civilization. Policeman and firemen were today's warriors while lawyers defended people by rules set by the law. Cage and Fish was one of those groups of lawyers and Ally McBeal belonged to them. Today, everyone sat or stood around the conference table reading the same manuscript warm and fresh from the copier. John Cage was deep into the amateurish story and Billy Thomas took a few seconds to grin every so often. Richard Fish was not amused as Georgia Thomas cried out.
"Oh my lord!" She continued reading.
"You reading the part where you eat Greg?" Elaine asked.
"What?" Georgia skimmed the pages. "Where does that happen!"
Outside the conference room, Jennie McBeal wheeled Ally through the outer offices. Hearing the voices, she pushed her daughter's wheelchair closer to her friends.
"Guess who's here!" Jennie gleefully presented Ally. The pint-sized lady lawyer grinned confusingly at the dour, confused and surprised faces then wondered what the problem was. She then noticed her worn and dog-eared original manuscript on the table.
"What is that doing here!" She asked in a snit.
"Elaine typed it up and gave everyone copies." Billy explained. Ally shot a look at Elaine still reading her copy and remised that William wasn't here to read it.
"You don't really think of us like this? Do you?" Elaine asked.
"Ally," John spoke up. "You weren't intending to publish this, were you?"
"No, it's just..." Ally felt embarrassed. "I was going nuts being laid up with a broken leg. I needed something to do that I could look forward to." She straightened her lip. "It was for my eyes only."
"Well," Georgia stood up with her own evil smile and with the manuscript rolled up under her arm. "If you'll excuse me, I need to head to the unisex to pass a suit of armor." She cocked her head headed out mildly perturbed from the conference room.
"A jester?" Richard was a little hurt. "The comic relief? Sure I got the best lines, but in your sequel can I be Sir Richard of Canterbury?"
"I promise." Ally looked up at John and Elaine.
"I liked it." He admitted. "The goddess here and I will meet you for drinks in the bar."
"And I'll bring my underwear." Elaine added.
Ally forced a grin as she noticed her mother had picked up one of the copies. She skimmed it and then grinned ear to ear. At the last page, she stopped.
"Yes," She looked at her. "What about this virgin business!"
END
