Harry was in the common room, doing yoga. Tammo had gotten tired of looking for apples and had Triss (squirrel) take his place in the story.Everyone still thought that the big animals weren't unusualat all, and the regular cast thought nothing of thefact that the creatures from various Redwall novels seemed to be taking turns appearing in the story.Ron was building a small fort out of the couch cushions, only getting away with it by saying that he was looking for Hermione. "Harry, have you seen Hermione?" he asked, to further prove his point.
"Can't talk. Doing yoga."
Hermione rolled out from under the couch. "Wow, sothat's where all the dust was coming from. Oh, hi guys! Have you seen my apple?" Triss jumped off the chair she was sitting on.
"An apple is missing you say? Then let's not waste time talking!"
Harry and Ron started putting on their detective outfits.The other students in the room had gotten used to this.Hermione sighed. "What is it with you two and detective outfits?" she asked.
"They look cool. Plus they were two for a dollar at Wal-Mart."
"What is it with everybody and Wal-Mart?"
George, who was apparently eavesdropping, said. "But everyone shops at Wal- Mart!"
Triss drew her sword. "Will you get out of here you great lug?"
"Sorry!"
After George left, Triss put her sword back in her scabbard. "Right then, where will we search first?" H
ermione eagerly ran to the door. "Quick, to the library!" Harry tried to stop her. "Oh, no you don't!"
Five minutes later, they were all in the library AGAIN. "I can't believe she tricked us into coming here again." said Ron. Harry shrugged.
"Well, it IS the most likely place she would have dropped her apple."
"Really?" asked Triss.
"Oh, don't get me started!" the boys said at the same time.
Ron tapped Hermione on the shoulder. "Hermione, will you at least look for the stupid apple instead of reading the whole time?"
"Can't talk. Reading."
(Four hours later.)
"Triss!" yelled Hermione. "Stop that!" Triss was busy holding Malfoy at swordpoint. "Stop what?" she asked.
"Stop...never mind, keep going." said Hermione. Triss shrugged and turned back to Malfoy, who was freaking out seeing as he was the only one who realized that squirrels from Redwall weren't common in Hogwarts.
"Now, if you EVER call me names again..."
Hermione started pushing Harry and Ron out of the library. "Let's go now." she said.
"Aw, man!" protested Ron, "We wanna watch Triss cut up Malfoy!"
"Too late, she just tied him to a shelf and gagged him."
Triss walked over to the trio, dusting her paws off. "Ok, where to next?" They wandered up to some room on the twelfth floor.
"Why would my apple be here?" asked Hermione. "I've never been here in my life!"
Triss pointed at something. "Hey, what's that in the corner?" Clem walked out of the dark corner. As he did so, lightning flashed, scary music played and it was suddenlynighttime.
"It's me again!"
Harry, Ron, and Hermione groaned. "NOT AGAIN!"
Triss studied Clem for a moment. "Who's that?" she asked.
Suddenly, every known character from the books poked their heads in from the door, windows, and cupboards. "THAT'S CLEM!" they all said in unison and then disappeared again. Triss blinked twice.
"Wow, what a crowd! Do you know all those people?"
"Don't ask." muttered Hermione. Clem's lower lip trembled.
"You don't know me?" he asked before he started sobbing hysterically.
Hermione threw up her hands in disgust and marched to the door. "That's it! HEY, GUYS! GET HIM!" Rutt and Tuke, the moose from Brother Bear ran in.A lot of people thought this was perfectly normal, but some knew better.
"Get who, eh?" asked Rutt. Tuke looked around. "I think she means Clem."
"Of course she means Clem!"
"That's what I said, eh."
Rutt and Tuke trampled Clem several times, then head-butted him out the window. As he fell, Clem muttered to himself. "Here we go again! They're gonna throw that exploding parachute out the window at me, I know it! I can't believe that squirrel didn't know me! Who doesn't know me? I'm CLEM!"
Meanwhile, down below Clem, Fred and George were sitting on the ground beside their Exploding Parachute. "I finally found the Exploding Parachute!" exclaimed Fred.
"Awesome! Who are we gonna test it on?"
"Your guess is as good as mine."
Clem landed on the parachute which exploded YET AGAIN. "Cool!" said George. "It works!"
"Let's go celebrate! Drinks all around!"
Back up on the twelfth floor, Rutt and Tuke were saying good-bye. "Well, see you later, eh." said Rutt. "We gotta go eat some grass."
"Thanks for getting rid of Clem for us."said Hermione, looking out the windowthey had thrown Clem out of.
"Oh, don't mention it." said Tuke. "He was pretty creepy, eh? Course, he did give us those nice kiwis..." The two moose left to go eat grass.
"Hey! I just remembered something!" exclaimed Hermione.
"What?" asked Ron.
"I never had an apple!"
"WHAT?"
"You mean we've been searching for an apple that doesn't exist?" asked Triss.
Hermione shrugged. "Well, first Harry lost his apple, then Ron lost his apple so I thought that I had an apple too!"
"That makes sense." said Harry.
Ron was still not satisfied. "But what about our detective outfits?"
Triss thought for a moment. "We can stillhave a costume party!"
"Ok!"
Two hours later, they were hosting a costume party out on the grounds. Harry and Ron were having a race to see who would be Sherlock Holmes, Fred and George were dressed up as each other (no one really noticed) while their exploding parachutes were selling like hotcakes. Triss was getting a lot of compliments on how good her squirrel costume was before she finally drew her sword yelling "For the last time, I'M NOT WEARING A COSTUME!" and sending a group of first years running and screaming.
