A series of low growls outside her door made Buffy curl up into a tight ball, her heartbeat increasing as adrenaline and fear flooded her veins. Spike still wasn't back. He'd been gone for what seemed like an eternity and now his minions were starting to scratch at the door like wolves.

Closing her eyes, she jumped as the sound of splintering wood filled the room. She could feel the vampire's signatures as they forced their way in, rushing towards her like a wave of pain and death. Gripping the chains tightly, she gritted her teeth and lashed out as they tried to seize hold of her, their fingernails scratching at her exposed skin as she attempted to fight them off. As one vampire mounted the bed and lunged towards her she kicked it backwards and watched it fly across the room, hitting the opposite wall hard and slumping into unconsciousness.

Panic filled her.

Fear fuelled her.

She felt like she was fighting for her life as her eyes darted around the room, absorbing as much information in as short a space of time as possible. There were at least six of them, all circling the bed and all reaching for her at the same time. There was no way she could take them all; the chains that bound her wrists were making it too hard for her to fight and she supposed that was why Spike had made them the length they were-so she couldn't effectively fight him.

A sharp pain in her thigh made her scream out in agony and roughly kick the minion responsible. Her heart felt as if it was about to smash out of her chest and she could feel her cheeks becoming tear stained as her fear turned to cold realisation-she was going to die.

There was no way she could stop them all.

Gritting her teeth she made a low growling noise and punched one of her attackers that had strayed too close to her fists. Lashing out with her legs, she desperately tried to hit as many of them as she could. She could feel them all trying to grab her and pin her down to the bed, could sense them all surrounding her as her vision blurred with pain. On her body she could feel a million small cuts, all stinging as her muscles ached from struggling against her assailants. Hands with grips of iron wrapped themselves tightly around her forearms and she tried to pull away from them as she watched in abject horror the vampire in front of her. He was mounting the bed. Slinking towards her as the others fought to keep her restrained.

"No…" Buffy breathed and shook her head, her eyes widening in fear as she furrowed her brows.

Death she could handle.

This she couldn't.

Making a last attempt to free herself she managed to pull her arms together, forcing the two vampires on either side of her to bash their skulls together hard enough to be knocked out. She screamed as two others grabbed hold of her legs, their claws ripping through her jeans and their grip bruising her tired flesh.

Buffy looked up at the vampire now trying to pry apart her knees, his face contorted into a vicious sneer as he grinned at the others pinning her down and restraining her. She felt like she was slipping away, her consciousness drawing itself back inside, away from her body as though there they couldn't hurt her-they could only take her flesh and not her heart and soul.

Closing her eyes and frowning hard, she felt tears slipping down her cheeks as her body ached, the tight grasps of the vampires holding her and marking her with deep bruises.

She felt the vampire's nails rake down her thighs, his hips nestling in between her knees as his hands coursed back up her body to her shirt. Staring blankly at the ceiling, she felt oddly detached as he ripped apart her shirt, exposing her seemingly frail body to the cool air of the room. She swallowed the painful lump in her throat as resignation hit her like a tidal wave, her emotions washing away with it as she wished she were dead already. Feeling his hands tearing apart her jeans, she closed her eyes again and wished she were far away. Safe again.

A loud roar filled her ears and the signature of a master vampire swirled in her stomach. The sound of the minions disintegrating and dust raining down all around didn't rouse her from her numb state of mind. She felt the vampire between her legs disappear and the grips on her limbs disintegrate, leaving her tired body free from their restraint. Immediately curling up into a ball she wept in earnest as she drew the covers around her, the marginal feeling of security they gave her simply not enough to make her feel any better.

Spike twisted the head off the minion kneeling before Buffy, his chest heaving with exertion as he looked around the room at the remaining vampire. He watched him dash out of the door with a petrified look on his face. Spike roared at him in a show of authority.

He panted hard as he finally looked down at Buffy.

She was curled up so tight.

So small.

So frail.

Frowning, he felt a weight of pain hit him hard in his chest. He'd done this. He'd left her alone when it had been clear to him that she didn't feel safe.

"What have I done?" Spike whispered as he stared blankly at her, his eyes roaming over her curled up form on the bed. From what he could see of her she was covered in cuts and bruises, her clothes ruined by the vicious assault. He didn't want to think about what could have happened if he hadn't come back when he did. His whole body seemed revolted at the thought and pushed away from it.

Moving around the bed, he lowered his head to look at her, trying to catch sight of her face as she clung to the sheet.

Spike growled.

This was his fault.

He'd fix it.

Pulling the key from his pocket, he went to catch hold of her hands but she pulled away from him, a whimper escaping her lips as she tried to back away across the bed.

"Shh…love…not going to hurt you."

She looked up at him with scared bloodshot eyes that seemed to pierce his heart.

Holding his hands up by his sides, he smiled slightly at her, showing her the keys and then pointing to the manacles.

"Just want to set you free, love…promise I won't hurt you."

Leaning forwards again he moved slowly, making sure every movement he made wasn't distressing her further and hoping that what he was doing was getting through to her. She looked so vacant, her eyes wide and her lashes wet with tears.

Spike watched a tear roll down her cheek as he unlocked her restraints. He wanted nothing more than to reach out and wipe her tears away but knew if he did, he would only scare her further. He needed to get her feeling as normal as possible, needed to help her get rid of the images that were probably lingering in her head. He'd seen girls, toys of his previous masters with the same expression she was wearing, like they weren't at home anymore-the body was there but the mind had drifted away to a safe place. He needed to get her back.

Keeping his eyes locked with hers, he set her free and then wrapped the sheet tighter around her, trying to make it clear he wasn't going to try anything. Scooping her up in his arms he swallowed hard as fresh tears rolled down her cheeks, her brows furrowing as she looked into his eyes.

"Not going to hurt you…we need to get you clean…" He whispered quietly, hoping it would soothe her and help stop her tears.

Buffy blinked at him.

A wide smile settled on his lips.

It was the first sign of her being conscious that he'd seen.

"Hey…beautiful…you in there?" Spike narrowed his eyes warmly on hers and watched her brows smooth out as she let her head rest against his arm. "Let's get you cleaned up."

Carrying her to the lair's makeshift shower, Spike's eyes remained on Buffy's as he thought about how he was going to do what came next. He needed her out of her clothes so he could clean her. He knew she wouldn't be able to clean herself. If he put her under the shower she'd just stand there, blank and empty, motionless.

Setting her down as he reached the small corner of the cave where he'd broken a water pipe and fixed up something resembling a shower, Spike took a moment to assess the situation and Buffy.

His remaining minions had scurried far into the recesses of the caves and the few he'd seen on his way to the shower had quickly disappeared, making it clear to him that they wouldn't be watched.

His eyes moved to rest on Buffy.

She was standing in the middle of the room, clinging to the sheet that was wrapped around her and rapidly becoming stained with her blood. He sighed as he looked at her. Her expression vacant, her fine golden hair a mess of tangles and sweat, her lower lip trembling as she fought back the tears.

She was broken.

The woman he once saw as proud, like a lioness, was nothing more than a frail girl.

Reality was harsh.

But she didn't deserve this.

This was his fault.

Taking a slow step towards her he watched her eyes dart up to meet his, her expression turning scared once more and he realised it was probably the Slayer in control. She could sense a vampire nearby and his signature meant nothing but danger to her.

"Hey…Buffy…" He dipped his head so his eyes were level with hers, making it easier on her to look at him and making himself appear smaller so she wouldn't be as scared by his presence. "We need to get you clean, love…might be a little cold…"

He reached out to remove the sheet but stopped as she tensed, her fingers grasping it tighter as she looked petrified.

"Shh…love…" Spike held his hands up again, letting his voice turn gentle as he pointed at the shower. "Just want to get you clean…um…not going to hurt you Buffy…can you hear me? Not going to hurt you…"

He watched her relax slightly, her fingers releasing their vice-like grip on the white material wrapped about her.

Spike slowly removed the sheet and placed it to one side.

"Now comes the part where you either show me some trust or kick my arse…god I hope it's the former, pet…you've been through enough for one lifetime…"

Buffy blinked languidly. Her eyes widened as she watched him coming back towards her.

He smiled as he found her eyes following his movements, another tiny sign that she was still in there somewhere.

He paused.

His fingers trembled as he considered how to do this.

She was going to kill him.

"Buffy…" Spike whispered as he moved towards her. "Got to get you clean, remember nice showers? Make Buffy all clean again…please, love…don't kill me…"

He closed his eyes as he touched the collar of her shirt, waiting with baited breath for her reaction. When she didn't lash out at him, he opened one eye and then the other. She was staring straight into them.

Slowly removing her shirt, he looked down at the flimsy cotton material in his hands and then back up at Buffy. She had folded her arms across her chest.

He frowned.

"I'm sorry, love." He sighed as he looked down at her jeans. "Wish there was another way…wish I hadn't left you…it was stupid of me…god, I'm a wanker…"

Buffy blinked.

Spike tentatively reached his hand out and touched the waistband of her jeans, she tensed for a moment and then relaxed again as he met her eyes.

"Not going to hurt you…"

Buffy shook her head.

Spike smiled, his insides warming through from receiving a more positive sign of life from her.

Slipping her jeans down he watched her hands race to cover what was already hidden beneath her cream underwear.

Moving over to the shower, he turned the water on and put his hand under it, it was tepid at best.

"This might be cold. Won't keep you here long…" Spike removed his red shirt and placed it with the sheet. Grabbing hold of Buffy's ruined shirt in one hand and reaching out to her with the other, he smiled warmly as she walked towards him, her steps shaky.

Buffy flinched as the water hit her.

It was cold.

Startling.

She felt as if she was being dragged forcibly back into the world.

Whimpering, she looked up at the water as it rained down on her, her body trembling with cold and fatigue as she let the water wash away the lingering dirty feeling on her skin.

Closing her eyes, she let her tears fall once more, not caring if she looked weak and not caring what he'd think of her.

Spike frowned as he watched her lower lip trembling and he knew it wasn't because of the cold.

Shutting the water off he took a long deep breath and picked the sheet up before walking towards her where she stood dripping wet in a puddle.

"Need to dry you off, love…not going to hurt you…"

She watched his movements like a hawk as he patted and dabbed her skin gently with the sheet, drying her off as best he could with what he had available. Her hands never left her body, they remained stuck to her as she tried to hide herself from him.

Spike sighed.

Her arms and legs were littered with deep gashes that began bleeding again as he brushed the cloth against them, on her pale skin he could see patches of dark bruising starting to appear and they formed shapes like the handprints of her attackers.

Walking around behind her he saw her head turn slightly, her eyes trying to follow his movements so she could see exactly what he was up to. He squeezed the excess water from her hair before drying her back and her legs. With every stroke of the sheet he could feel her trembling under his hands, could sense the fear and distress coming off her in sickening waves.

Heaving a long sigh, he let the dirty, wet sheet drop to the ground and watched her brows furrow as she looked from it to her half naked form.

"Don't worry, pet…we'll get you covered up." Moving across the room, he picked up his red shirt and walked back to her.

She followed his hands as he gently slipped the shirt onto her and slowly buttoned it up, her hands hanging limp at her sides as she started to feel more comfortable again.

Spike looked down at her legs. They had sustained most of the attack and were still bleeding profusely. He momentarily considered asking her if she would let him close the wounds for her but something inside him said she would say no and he would feel foolish for ever mentioning it.

Or believing she would trust him now.

Frowning hard, he continued to stare at her legs.

Buffy furrowed her brows at the stony cold expression on his face.

She backed away a step and wrapped her arms protectively around herself.

Spike blinked and raised his eyes to meet hers, his expression instantly softening as he realised he was scaring her.

"Sorry, pet…just trying to figure out what to do…they need to heal…" He pointed to her legs and saw her eyes slowly move to rest on them, her face a mask of blankness once more. "…Can't cover them up tonight, they need air and time to heal…" He lowered his voice and eyes as he mumbled. "…I'd heal them, but I don't think you'd like that…"

Buffy blinked and rubbed her arms, trying to warm them up through the thin material of his shirt.

"Come on, love. Let's get you back and warmed up, all comfy and stuff." Spike went to move towards her but she backed away a step, her eyes wide as she blinked at him.

He knit his brows as he tried to figure out what was wrong with her now. Something he'd said had clearly upset her but he couldn't figure out what it was. This day had to rank up there with the worst ones of his existence. Trying to relieve the weight of guilt and the feelings he felt while at the same time working out what was going through her head without her actually speaking was proving to be more than difficult.

She hadn't been bothered by his mention of healing her wounds for her, she'd just intimated in her own little way that she was cold.

It had been his mention of taking her back to the bedroom.

"Stupid, Spike." He growled at himself as he realised it would be the last place she'd want to go after her ordeal. Raising his eyes to meet hers, he dipped his head and smiled slightly at her. "Won't take you there, take you somewhere safe, somewhere they can't get to you."

He knew she wouldn't understand if he told her he'd killed almost all her attackers anyway, leaving one alive to let the others know what happens to his minions when they mess with his captive. She would just think of all the others, the ones they had caught fleeting glimpses of on their way to the shower.

Holding his hand out to her, he watched her eyes move to rest on it, her arms releasing their protective grasp on her body as she slipped her hand shakily into his.

"Can I carry you, pet?" Spike nodded down at her legs and her bare feet. "Might be a little uncomfortable and painful for you to walk."

When she didn't move to run away he scooped her up into his arms again and sighed as her head settled against his chest, her fingers grasping his black t-shirt tightly as he started to walk with her.

Looking down at her the whole time he considered just how long it was going to take her to recover, to come out of her shell and back into the world again. Part of him was saying that he should take her back to her Watcher's house or her mother's, the other part of him didn't want to be apart from her when she was so frail and vulnerable.

And that scared him.

He swallowed hard as his eyes met hers, he could see the tears still threatening to spill over but there seemed to be a little more life in her green orbs now as they watched him quietly, almost calmly.

"You still in there, Buffy? Love?" Spike held her a little tighter to him as he turned a corner and started down the long corridor to his bedroom. "Just a sign, pet…anything…blink if you can hear me in there."

He held his breath as he watched her, her face a mask of stony silence.

Just as he was about to give up hope of getting a sign from her, she blinked.

He smiled slightly.

"There's my girl."