Author's NoTe: After reading the reviews, I hear that you guys didn't enjoy chapter 12 at all, well, most of you. I'm sorry if it was upsetting that the timeline just sped up and everything. But I'll rewrite to make it a bit slower so that the point of the speed can be understood more. For now, here's chapter 13.
Chapter 13
My Forgiveness
Two Years Back
Lacus crouched down to her daughter's height as she taught her how to walk all by herself, without Kira. That is, until the doorbell rang. Lacus sighed as she got up and walked toward her daughter and picked her up, heading for the door. Lacus blinked as she saw someone she hadn't seen in awhile.
"Kira?" Lacus cocked her head to the side. It wasn't that she wasn't happy to see him…but it was a bit awkward to see him away from Fllay.
Kira smiled at her as he stepped in her house and stared around with his hands in his pockets. He looked toward Lacus with yet another pleasing smile and stared at the child in her hands. "So she's the one you adopted. It's been all over the news," Kira laughed as he reached his arms out and Lacus nodded as she placed Erika in his arms. "What was her name again?" Kira said as he twirled Erika around and she giggled happily.
"E-Erika," Lacus responded as she watched carefully to Kira's reactions to the child.
"Did you find out the reason why her parents abandoned her? She seems like a really sweet child," Kira grinned as he tickled Erika on the sides and she playfully bit his finger. "Ow!" Kira said as he rubbed his finger against his shirt. Lacus laughed heartily as she took Erika away from Kira and rocked her in her arms.
Lacus stared down at Erika's violet eyes and then looked up to Kira who was patiently waiting for an answer.
"They didn't really explain much to me. But they said that the mother was forced to give up the child because she was afraid the father wouldn't want her. So…she thought he'd be better off not knowing at all about Erika," Lacus shrugged. Kira nodded slowly.
"Still, that's pretty sad."
"Huh?"
"She should've at least asked the father what he thought of having a child. What if he had said yes? What if he would've had no problem taking care of his own flesh and blood? Did she even make an attempt to ask her husband?" Kira said looking at Lacus from the corner of his eye. Lacus froze in her spot and gulped and tried to look as innocent as possible.
"I…I…"
"But that's not my decision to make…afterall, we can never change the past…"
"Kira?" Lacus stared up at him as he turned to face her.
"Yeah?"
"How come you weren't at Tsubasa's birth?"
"Tsubasa?" Kira blinked.
"Yes, Cagalli's son. Didn't you get a call two years ago about his birth?" Lacus said with a befuddled face.
Kira's eyes widened. "What?! I didn't get any call!"
"But how can that be? I called Fllay's secretary to give the message to Fllay to give the message to you. Why wouldn't you have got it? I told them it was urgent. I only called their offices because I was told that you'd be there."
"I was … probably … I spend a lot of time there. Now that I think about it. Oh, God…Cagalli must've been so mad at me…I better call her."
"Have you talked to her at all lately? When was the last time you talked to her?" Lacus raised an eyebrow as she peered down at Erika, who was now sound asleep.
"I don't really know…Fllay's been keeping me, I guess."
"What could me more important then your own family and friends, Kira? Surely, Fllay can't be keeping you 24/7," Lacus cocked her head to the side.
"It's just that … I don't want to upset her … she's been really stressed out lately. But your dad's been a real help to her. She's really thankful," Kira smiled again. Lacus smiled back.
"I'm glad," she responded as she turned around with Erika in her arms and headed for the crib in the upstairs room.
"How have you been doing, Lacus?" Kira asked as he stood at the entry of the doorway to Erika's room as Lacus placed Erika in her crib gently. She bent back up and turned around to face him.
"I've been doing fine, Kira. How is it with Fllay?" Lacus smiled falsely once more.
"She's fine. She's getting better at the dealings with politics and everything."
"At least she's doing good. Kira, what is the real reason you've come to visit me today?" Lacus said as she approached the kitchen and brought out two mugs and filled them with coffee.
Kira scratched his head, not knowing what to say. "I just wanted to know how you were doing …" he gulped, suddenly feeling of the presence of Lacus in front of him. Lacus rolled her eyes at him and placed a firm hand on his shoulder, and then smiled as Kira's confused face stared back at her smile.
"You feel that you're not giving enough to Fllay, right?" Lacus patted his shoulder and passed him to the dishwasher, grabbing the dishes out. "You know her better than I do, what does she like about you? Has she told you?"
Kira gaped at her as she continued t dry up dishes and place them into the cabinets. "How'd you know?"
"Just because I haven't seen you in awhile doesn't mean I still don't know who you are, Kira Yamato," Lacus laughed.
"Thanks," Kira smiled. "I'm just glad that you're still talking to me. Recently, Athrun hung up on me when I called him."
"They were upset when you didn't come for the birth of Tsubasa."
"I'm really sorry about that…"
"Don't say it to me. I'm not your sister."
"Right …"
"So, Kira…" Lacus paused as she leaned onto the table beside Kira and stared up at the ceiling. She sighed and looked at him. "We will be seeing you in the future, right? And you'll still be the same Kira that we all know and love?"
Kira nodded. "Why would I change?"
Lacus closed her eyes and stared downward. "Because you have a girlfriend now who you've been with for two years…" she stared up at him again with sincere eyes. "That's a long time to be with someone you care about, Kira, someone you love more than anyone else."
"Uhh…" he blinked. He had never really thought of that before.
"You might change just for her…" Lacus sighed heavily. "I know that as you grow, you have to change, it's the only way we can evolve. But still, Kira, please don't change so much that you're a completely different person. Please don't," Lacus said with tears slowly running down her cheeks. Kira's eyes widened at her tears as she leaned off the table. "Please…Kira…If you do …I … I …"
Kira stared at her with sympathy in his eyes and as he was about to say something, she continued.
"Kira, you're special to me and you know that. We've been friends for as long as I can remember and I'll be here to always help you whenever you need me. But Kira…just … just promise me…you won't be so in love with Fllay that you'll forget about the other people that love you, too," Lacus gritted her teeth as she approached in front of Kira and walked closer to him. She was so close to him and she began walking closer to him, except slowly. Kira stared down at her with a frown on his face and Lacus buried her face in his clothes and cried. "I miss you, Kira, everyone does."
Kira bit his lip and leaned off the table, hugging her. He closed his eyes as he wrapped his arms around her tighter, closer to his warmth. "I'm sorry, Lacus."
END FLASHBACK
Lacus stared out into her view of the outward city from her office. She had her hands behind her back and sighed. She turned around to her office desk and stared at her picture of herself and Erika. She laughed and turned back around to stare out at the rain that continued to pour. She placed her hand on the window.
"I'm sorry you don't have a father, Erika. But he … he's gone," her eyes shaped downward and then suddenly, her door just opened and there entered someone she had been accustomed to seeing on TV. She did not look back, she knew exactly who it was by the clacking of heels on the marble floor. "Fllay," Lacus said as politely as she could.
"Lacus," Fllay said as she walked toward her and toward the window. She leaned back on it and smiled at her. "Where's the runt?"
"Erika is at home, Fllay. Cagalli's baby-sitting today. She's been a bit tired lately," Lacus responded as she continued to stare out the window.
"Lacus, have you seen Kira lately?" Fllay smirked, almost too noticeable.
"At Tsubasa's birthday party, why do you ask?"
"Oh, nothing…just wondering," Fllay glared toward the floor and she mumbled something too quiet to hear.
"Fllay, have you been purposely making diversions so Kira won't see his other loved ones?" Lacus asked calmly, sighing, and opening and closing her eyes.
Fllay scoffed. "Why would I do such a thing? I don't really care to tell you the honest truth. He can go see his stupid sister and his lame friend."
"Lies," Lacus said darkly.
"What?!" Fllay growled.
"You kept Kira from Tsubasa's birth, didn't you?" Lacus glared at her, with the rage of fire in her eyes.
Fllay plopped in Lacus' desk chair as she crossed her legs and stared at the pictures on her desk. "And what if I did? Why should Kira pick some stupid kid's birth over spending time with me?"
"How could you?! Cagalli had been talking about that day with Kira for months!"
"So? He's got me now. He doesn't need his sister!"
"Fllay!"
"What?! At least I don't have an abandoned child!" Fllay glared back at her as she swirled in her chair to face the infuriated Lacus.
Losing all control, Lacus grabbed Fllay by her upper garments, lifting her off the chair. "DON'T YOU DARE TALK ABOUT MY DAUGHTER LIKE THAT!"
"Why do you care? It's true! NOW PUT ME DOWN!" Fllay yelled back at her, nearly slapping her.
"NO! IT'S NOT TRUE! She has a mother and that's me! She has a father and that's –" Lacus stopped, realizing what she almost said and dropped Fllay back down on the chair.
"And the father is who?" Fllay said, getting up without fixing the wrinkles in her chair.
Lacus ran her hands through her hair. "F-Forget it."
"No…so who is the father, Lacus?"
"He abandoned her."
"No…you know who it is. So tell me."
"Look, Fllay, just forget about it."
"This wouldn't have to do with Kira, would it?"
"NO!" Lacus yelled, almost too loudly.
Fllay's eyes widened in surprise and she jumped out of the chair, stepping back slowly. "K-Kira's the father of Erika?! What?!"
Lacus shook her head vigorously. "No, he isn't!"
"Y-Yes, he is! When?! How could Kira not tell me this?! How?!" Fllay looked bewildered, almost crazy, like she had just found something that was out of this world. Well, it was…for her, anyway.
"Fllay, just stop!"
"No! I should've killed you when I had the chance! I should've! I should've told him yes, those four years ago! I should've!! I SHOULD'VE!!"
"What? Kill me? Why?"
"Four years ago…a man … with blonde hair … I can't remember his name…called me and offered to kill me if you got at all involved with Kira…and you did! I mean, you are! Does he even know that Erika's his child?! Oh, you're gone, Lacus Clyne! You're gone!"
"Fllay, what are you—"
"Clyne," an unusually familiar voice rung in Lacus' ears as she stared horrified in the corner of her office, the presence of an evil man. The presence of a man who had haunted her just last year…the day of her father's death.
One Year Back
Lacus fell to her knees as she saw her father sprawled out on the floor, blood spreading from under him, and she felt tears run from her eyes. She gritted her teeth, holding in her screams, until the tips of black-shoed footsteps sound in her ears. She turned around slowly, to see someone, she had only heard legends of.
"It couldn't be …" she felt her whole body shiver as he only neared her.
"Ah, yes it is," Rau smirked pulling her by the hair as she winced in pain. Lacus closed her eyes in fright until she was made to open them and only more shivers ran down her cold spine.
"You're not real…you didn't do this…I'm just dreaming…"
"Oh, Ms. Clyne, are you hurt to see you're one and only father cold and dead? The one person you could turn to for comfort? The one person who knew how you really felt? The multiple diary entries you've written…the pain of cries in the night…the pain of losing a loved one…the pain of losing…dare I say it? Kira Yamato."
Rau let go of his grip on her hair and she fell to the floor, trembling dangerously. Lacus stared up at him, horrified, as he stared back down at her through his pitch black sunglasses with a smirk on his face. "How…"
"It hurts…I can hear your sad heart aching for me to stop. You're screaming for every moment to be unreal, to be a fantasy. You wish for me to stop talking at this very second. Ah, but Lacus Clyne, I will not. Your father had to go …for … his sake."
"What did Patrick Zala want with my father that he had to kill him for it, Rau?! A-Answer me!" she yelled out in a shaky voice as the echoes bounced off Siegel's office walls.
"You are as smart as they say, Ms. Clyne," Rau laughed cruelly, putting the safety on his gun and placing it into his pocket. "Something about a deal that should've went through, but you're father didn't want it. He wanted to continue to have the peace with all the other companies. Zala wanted to buy every single company, a Clyne and Zala empire, he wanted to overrun the Allster company…that is … "
"But why kill him for it?! Too much power like that is dangerous! Everyone knows that!" Lacus said angrily.
"Ah, but Zala is a changed man after his wife was killed in the car accident by an Allster employee and after he lost his son to another employee. Kira Yamato's sister, if I'm not mistaken, Ms. Clyne."
"But that is no reason to go on killing people!"
"You care, why? This has nothing to do with you, I haven't received any orders at all to annihilate you."
"But this is my father! It has everything to do with me!"
Rau sighed as he bent down to where she crouched on the floor. "Not just yet. I advise you to not tell anyone about what you've just heard…or else…I might take it out on Allster's boyfriend. Don't push your luck."
Lacus shrieked out. "Touch Kira and I'll hunt you down, Creuset."
"Now, now, why kill the assassin when you can kill the master of assassins, hmm?"
"What?"
"If you want to know where Patrick Zala is, all you have to do is ask me…how to contact me? Simple…" he neared to her ear and talked in a cold, smooth tone. "Call Zala Enterprises and when you reach the operator, simple dial KILL, in numeric form," and he pulled away. "But no tricks, Clyne, call the police, and everyone you know his history…and that's … a lot of people. You wouldn't want a killing spree, would you?"
Lacus sat there, holding herself, as she turned around to look at her father, and then turned back to Rau and slowly nodded.
"I'm glad we've come to an agreement."
End Flashback
"Why … you… Fllay…"
"I'm sorry, Lacus…I'm sorry…but Kira…Kira is …" Fllay's eyes was filled with ears as she gripped her knuckles. "Kira is mine and it will stay that way!!"
"Fllay…" Lacus looked back and forth between the blonde-haired man and the red-head beside him.
"I see you remember me from our last meeting."
"How could I? You did it right in front me!"
"And did it pain you, Lacus? Did it pain you so? But I bet it didn't pain when you were with the writer, right? Four years ago…on that single night…"
Lacus' eyes widened as he continued to speak. "You probably know my name, right?"
"Rau. Rau Le Creuset, assassin for Patrick Zala. Twenty-Three murders, never been caught. Yes, I have my sources underground, too," Lacus stared at him in fright.
"Very informative, this one. So shall I kill her now, Ms. Fllay…?" Rau reached for the gun in his pocket until Fllay, now calm, stepped ahead of Rau.
"No, we will give you a week, Lacus. One week. You will make sure that Kira hates you…no…loathes you. I want him to think that you're the worst person alive. That's what I want him to think…you can no longer be friends…and if you come near Kira at all after that week, if you succeed…I'll make sure you die," Fllay said menacingly.
Lacus stared at her, horrified, and as Fllay and Rau turned around, Fllay turned to her once more.
"What is it?" Lacus glared back.
Fllay sneered. "If you are to tell anyone, especially Kira, then I'll make sure, not just you, but your daughter as well will go down. Don't underestimate my influence either, Lacus. Just because you have friends doesn't mean I can't have more."
Lacus was neither frightened nor joyful. It was somewhere in the middle, a feeling she had never described before and as Fllay turned around with Rau and exited, she simply broke out laughing.
Laughing like she had never before.
And this time…she couldn't stop.
----
Cagalli entered the Pre-K yard and searched for her son and niece. She squinted at the blinding sight of kids running here and there until she found herself looking down at a patch of blue hair that could be spotted a million miles away; and from behind her, Erika hugged her legs. Cagalli laughed as they slowly let go. She gave Tsubasa kiss on the forehead and then returned to face Erika, who had tears running down her cheeks.
Cagalli stared at her worriedly. "Erika, something wrong?"
Erika sniffed. "Mr. Yamato didn't come today like he promised! He promised that he would read us a story!"
Tsubasa had his hands on his waist and he stared at his cousin angrily. "He's not going to be coming back! He doesn't like us anymore, Erika!"
Cagalli took a hard stare at her son. "Now Tsubasa, don't treat your cousin like that."
"But it's true! He doesn't even come to say hi!" Tsubasa crossed his arms like the four-year old he was and Cagalli grabbed him gently by the hand and also Erika's.
"We're going now," Cagalli said angrily as she took them to their cubbies and then turned around to find their teacher.
Moments later, she returned and she found Erika, in their small classroom, sitting on her little carpet with her name on it. She still continued to cry. Cagalli sighed heavily as she turned back to Tsubasa who was waiting impatiently to go home. Cagalli ran her hands through her hair and bent down to Tsubasa's height. "Now, Tsu-Tsu, just wait at your cubby and we'll go home in a couple of minutes. If you be good, I'll get you the ice cream you like so much. Okay?"
Tsubasa nodded and rushed to sit like a good little boy in front of his cubby.
Cagalli twirled the keys in her hand and stuffed them into her pocket as she sat next to Erika, who stared at the chair in the middle of the circle of cut carpets. Cagalli inferenced that the spot had been reserved especially for Kira. She shook her head. She missed her brother so…
Before Cagalli could speak, she could hear the soft murmurs of Erika. "He p-promised…H-He c-called mommy…and s-said he was c-c-coming …"
Cagalli's eyes softened and took Erika and sat her on her lap. "Oh, Erika…you have to understand that not all things come out as planned…you have to understand that." Cagalli knew she was talking to a four-year old, but she had to somehow make her understand that Kira Yamato was a completely different person than he had been four years ago.
"Kira's different now, Erika, he has Fllay, you remember her, right?"
"You mean the red monster?" Erika stared down at the floor angrily as she continued to sit on her aunt's lap.
"Red monster?" Cagalli blinked. She laughed as she sat her head on Erika's. "Now who told you that?"
"That's what Tsu-Tsu calls her…"
"He does, does he?" Cagalli stared at Tsubasa from the corner of her eye and saw him slowly drifting asleep as he sat Indian-style by his cubby.
Another set of jingling keys was heard and Cagalli heard a scream of kids. She blinked and saw that Tsubasa had awakened to look at the door, standing up, but saw Cagalli, and sat back down, trying to get back to sleep. Cagalli turned to look down at Erika, who was still frowning, she sighed.
"Don't you want to see what seems to be so fun?"
"They're just drawing chalk now…"
"Oh, but don't you want to play?"
"No."
"What if it was just more than chalk?" the masculine voice said as Erika looked up excitedly and sprung out of Cagalli's lap.
"Mr. Yamato!!!" she laughed happily hugging his legs. Kira stared at her and picked her up.
Cagalli stared at him as he entered the room, she knew she couldn't bring Erika home now. She guessed that she would just leave it to Lacus.
"Told you I wouldn't let you down."
Erika stared at him angrily. "You were supposed to come earlier!!"
"I got stuck in traffic," he laughed. "Can you blame me?"
"Then make it go away so you can get here faster!!"
"I can't just do that, Erika," Kira laughed as he put her down.
"Nice to see you made it," Cagalli said calmly, pulling out her key, and taking Tsubasa by the hand. "Come on, Tsu-Tsu, let's go."
"But mommy, I wanna stay for his story!"
"No, we're leaving. Have fun, Kira," Cagalli said with hate in her eyes as she passed him. Before Kira could chase after his sister, the twenty other kids ran into the room, surrounding him.
"Cagalli!" Kira looked down and smiled politely at the kids, shooing them away. "Wait!"
As Cagalli walked up the stairs and to the parking lot, Kira rushed to her side, grabbing her by the shoulder. Cagalli, infuriated, let go of Tsubasa and grabbed his hand, squeezing it tightly, pushing him away. "Stay away from me!"
"But Cagalli…"
"Cagalli, is this man bothering you?" Athrun said rushing to her side from out of their car as two beeps were heard after he locked the car.
"No, Athrun, in fact, I don't even know why he followed us in the first place. One moment he was in the room and then suddenly he comes running after me like he knows us," Cagalli remarked coldly.
Athrun stood in front of them protectively as Tsu-Tsu hugged his father's leg. "Stay away from my family, whoever you are."
"Athrun…it's me…Kira…"
"Kira? I only knew him a long time ago…and that was when …" Athrun paused as he continued to stare him down. "He was still my best friend."
Kira gasped lightly as Athrun turned around, picking up Tsu-Tsu, walking away from him with Cagalli by his side. Kira watched them get into the car and speed away. He turned around and sat on the steps, grabbing his head and burying his head onto his lap.
The rush of light footsteps surprised him as Erika shook him to look at her. She stared at him worriedly. "Why is Mr. Yamato sad? Was it something that Erika did?"
"No, Erika, of course not. You've been a very good girl," Kira laughed as he sat Erika on his lap and hugged her closer to her chest, a motion that seemed almost too right. He stared out thoughtfully into space, until words came to him and without thinking, they came out. "Erika, would you happy if I was to be your dad?"
"Huh?" Erika turned around to him, confused. "I don't understand what Mr. Yamato is asking."
Kira sighed. "Would you like it if I was your daddy?"
Erika's eyes widened in delight and she shook her head up and down excitedly. She jumped off his lap and onto the other step, twirling around. "That way, we could go to more places and mommy wouldn't always have to take care of me! She'd be more happy, too, just like me! She's smile again and I'd have someone to twirl me around again since mommy can't anymore! Everything would be so cool! Like a real big happy family!" Erika giggled as she continued to name off happy times.
"But aren't you happy now, the way you are?"
Erika stopped twirling and smiled at Kira. "Yes…but mommy always says sorry to me every night saying that she's sorry I can't have a daddy…she says she tried but he won't come to say hi or anything…she always says sorry for things Erika don't understand yet…but I can hear her crying like she has many boo-boos…like when Erika cries when she falls and gets my knees hurt…"
Kira stared at her sadly. He knew exactly why Lacus was crying…
He had all the facts now…
It was him.
He was the father of Erika Clyne.
----
"So…now the Allster wants the Clyne dead? How wonderful this is playing…" Patrick Zala laughed as he sat in his high chair beneath the main building of Zala Enterprises.
Rau smirked in the darkness. "Yes, but unfortunately, she can only die if she breaks the deal with Allster."
"I wouldn't worry about Clyne just yet…if they continue to fight, one has to agree with what I want…"
"Why not try Allster? She's a very persuasive girl for power…in fact, she wants Yamato all to herself…"
"How touching, Rau," Patrick said sarcastically, stepping out of his chair. "I think it's time…" his feet tapped against the marble and the lights were finally turned on. "I made my appearance."
----
Author's Note: So…did the chapter help redeem the story? Teehee, I'm in the process of rewriting chapter 12, don't worry. Sorry again if chapter 12 was so horrifying.
Next Chapter
14. Erika's Wish
