A/N: I don't own it, I know that except when I stop taking my meds. I'm sorry for not updating in such a long time (2 whole weeks). Life is kind of crazy at the moment, but I'll try and write and update as much as possible. Read and review or I'll cry.
Chapter Two
I sat through the rest of the awards in kind of a daze. I was so glad that I wasn't sitting in a prominent seat and likely to get my face all over the television, because I'm sure I was pouting. It wasn't fair at all. It wasn't supposed to happen like this.
I'd imagined my first meeting with Ephram after so long so many times, and it never went like this. It should have been so perfect. We were both grown ups now and both successful musicians. He wasn't supposed to be married.
I pulled myself together as much as I possibly could and sat through the rest of the stuff. I even managed to smile and cheer when my friend Rachel won Best Country Album. It was kind of a case of getting myself to the afterparty and getting through that so that I could forget that I'd almost made a fool of myself by coming on to my now married ex-boyfriend. But after a while I realized something. Even though getting back with Ephram, a stupid dream I'd held for far too long was now impossible, I didn't want to loose him again. I realized that I'd rather have him as a friend than never see him again.
I actually felt like an adult when I realized that, rather than the spoiled childish rock star I like to imagine I am.
I managed to walk into the after party at the same time as the teenage flavor of the moment. That worked out for me in two ways actually. First it meant that I could walk in without having to stop and smile at the cameras for 15 minutes, and second it made me feel good about my talent. I'm no Mozart, but I was way better than her.
As soon as I got in the door a 21-year-old missile launched herself at me.
"Madison!"
I opened my arms and drew Delia into a hug. "Hey sweetie!"
It was so weird to see her again after all this time. I still remembered her as an elementary school student. Now she was an adult. The same age as I was when I last saw her. The same age as I'd been when I'd...
I shook it off.
"It's so good to see you! I can't believe it."
Delia smiled back at me. "I knew you'd be here. This is just so cool." She was still the same as I remembered her in so many ways. "Nobody at school believed I knew you. I had to show them like, 30 pictures of us before they realized I was telling the truth."
I laughed. "I'll mention you in the notes on my next CD, so they'll have to believe you."
Delia smiled, then just kind of stopped. "This is just so darn weird. I haven't seen you in 10 years. I mean I've seen you, in People magazine and on ET. But I haven seen you, and I'm kind of talking in circles here so I'm going to shut up now."
"You're right. It is kind of weird." I didn't have any clue what I was supposed to say to that.
"So where are you at school?" I decided to skip asking her about the stupidly large number of years I'd been missing from her life.
"NYU."
"Wow!" I was impressed.
"Well. I kind of decided I was going to go there when Mary-Kate and Ashley went there." She blushed a little.
I couldn't help the real, honest laugh that exploded from me when I said that. I guess I was kind of loud, because a few people around me turned to look at me.
I calmed myself down. "So that's how come you could be an emergency date." She looked at me quizzically. "Ephram told me he called you in at the last minute when his wife couldn't make it."
Her expression turned dark for a moment. She looked around for a moment and seemed to focus on her brother, who was currently standing in line at the bar.
"Well, if by couldn't make it you mean 'didn't want to' then I guess so. She decided to work late. On the night when her husband gets to present a Grammy!"
I could feel the anger running off her in waves.
"What's she like?" I wanted to know, but I kind of really didn't. Please don't be that Abbott girl, I silently prayed.
"Katie?" Not Amy Abbott then. "I guess she's ok. She's just kind of... I don't know...not really there I guess.
"She finished law school last summer and she seems to spend 18 hours a day at the darn firm she joined. They haven't even been married a year! And she couldn't make herself leave the office for one evening so she could support Ephram.
"It just makes me mad." She didn't really look so much mad, as upset.
I would have asked her more, but Ephram chose that moment to reappear with three glasses of champagne. I eagerly accepted the one he offered me.
We chatted about nothing for a little while, but I knew it was getting late. I checked the watch I'd placed in my bag. It was 11:10.
"I think I'm gonna go." In rock star terms it was really early, but I didn't want to still be there at midnight.
"Already?" Ephram looked surprised.
"Yeah, I'm kind of tired. I'm about to fall asleep on my feet." It was a lie. I knew I wouldn't sleep that night.
"Well, ok, but let me get your number or something. I'm serious Madison. I don't want to loose touch with you again."
Why was he being so nice to me?
"Ok." I grabbed a pen from my purse and scribbled my number on his hand.
"Maybe we could grab lunch tomorrow or something?"
"No." I didn't even have to think about it. My plans for the next day were fixed.
His face fell. I realized how that must have sounded. "Later in the week or something. I have plans all day tomorrow." I tried to smile at him, but found I couldn't.
I hugged Delia and left. I grabbed a cab back to my apartment, and had to hold myself together all the way home.
The clock struck 12 as I headed into my building. I didn't turn into a pumpkin, but I could feel every grain of happiness left me. It was February 21st.
I collapsed onto the couch in my lounge, looked at the photos on my coffee table and burst into tears. It should have been my son's 9th birthday, but instead he hadn't even lived to see 9 months. Sobs wracked through me uncontrollably. It was like this every year, but this time it was so much worse.
I'd spent the evening with Ephram and Delia and I had totally forgotten about everything until I had checked the time. I had been with my son's father and I had forgotten. I felt like everything was crashing in on me.
My phone beeped as it received a message.
"Madison, It was so good to see you again. Now you have my number feel free to call me whenever. We have a lot to catch up on."
I just sobbed harder.
