Sorry it's taken so long for me to update! This chapter has been really stubborn and I've kind of been avoiding it. I'm dedicating it to all of you who have updated your fics since the last time I updated mine, because reading your updated fics made me realize how lazy I was getting and inspired me to actually get some real work done.

Due to a little misunderstanding, I think perhaps I ought to mention that I don't own Andromeda, though there are a few characters in this story that I do own. I am perfectly open to the use of my characters and ideas by other people, on the one condition that you tell me first. Or if you want access to any of the various plotlines that I've come up with and probably won't be able to write, you can email me – my email address is on my bio.

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I am floating in heaven.

Well, actually, I'm lying on a bed in Med Deck, but that's not the point.

It's quiet in Med Deck; I'm the only person here. Trance shot me full of nanobots to heal my head wound and the minor concussion I got in the crash. She insisted that I rest for a while, even though I told her that I have to contact Dylan as soon as I can, but it's impossible to argue with Trance when she's being sweet and reasonable, so eventually she made sure I was comfortable and left me alone with my thoughts, which are in utter turmoil right now.

I'm still shocked by what Rhade said to me in the middle of that deserted street in Boston. I never would have imagined that Rhade would say that to me! I've always just taken it for granted that he'd save his affections for some sly, beautiful, arrogant Nietzschean woman, if he was going to show his affections for anyone at all. I never dreamed he might feel the same way about me as I feel about him.

All right, so I did, but those nights were some the best I've ever had.

A few months ago – when we were hunting down Kulis Barra and Aleiss – Rhade and I were standing in a nightclub, untying each other's hands and joking about going dancing sometime. At the time, I didn't think I'd ever get the chance to go dancing with Rhade, and I wasn't even sure I really wanted to (casino-hopping is usually more my type of social outing). Now that I think about it, dancing doesn't seem so bad, if I'm doing it with Rhade. Although I wasn't kidding when I said I like to lead. But he said he knew a club somewhere – I'll have to ask him about it later, and hope he's willing to take me up on that offer.

Hmmm. It's really nice to relax and spend some quality time thinking about delightfully buff Nietzscheans. The high I'm getting from thinking about Rhade is better than anything Flash ever did for me.

It's funny, but apparently Rhade never really knew that I'm a Flash addict. When the Abyss took over my head, Dylan first thought I was acting weird because I was using again, but Rhade told me on the trip back to the Andromeda that no one had ever explained to him how I got addicted. I told him briefly how Trance and I had been captured by Uncle Sid when I went to answer a three-year-old message from him, and Sid forced me to take Flash, before trying to crash the Maru into a sun. Rhade didn't say anything after that, but just sat there with a stony look on his face, giving off an aura of such anger that if Sid had been in the room, I think he would have had to run for his life.

That's something that can be said about Rhade – when he really cares about someone, he's willing to give his life to protect them. He proved it when he was fawning over that Nietzschean pacifist fluff-head of his, Louisa or whatever her name was, who was a walking oxymoron if I ever saw one (who ever heard of a Nietzschean pacifist?). Rhade would have died for her, and he almost did. It makes me feel so special to think that maybe Rhade would be willing to die for me. Of course, I hope he never has to, but just the idea that he might makes me love him even more.

Thank God for Nietzscheans. They are truly amazing people. Well, a few of them are, at least. The rest are all egotistical ubers.

I can't help but think about Tyr; there's a small part of me that still cares about him. Tyr was a magnificent man. A self-pleasing, arrogant bastard, but a magnificent man nevertheless. I still remember our last night together, before he took us through the Route of Ages and gave me to the Abyss – that night was more than anything I could have imagined. I guess Rhade's got a lot to live up to.

I can't believe myself – I'm getting all soft and girly over a Nietzschean. It's so unlike me. I've been tomboyish Beka Valentine for as long as I can remember. Then again, Tyr and Rhade are probably the only two Nietzscheans in the entire universe worth getting soft and girly over. And Tyr's dead (I think), which leaves me with Rhade.

Like I said – I'm floating in heaven.

The door to Med Deck opens, though I can't see who's there, but I hear the sound of footsteps coming toward me. I push myself up on my elbows and turn my head just in time to see a large hand press me back into the bed. Rhade pulls a stool over and sits at my side. "How are you feeling?" he asks me.

"Fine, great, rested, pain-free –"

He gives me an amused glance – a quirked eyebrow and a tiny, twisted smile. "I take it that Trance decided you weren't well enough and forced you to stay and rest? And of course you're not happy."

I make a face. "No."

He looks past me, studying the door he came in through. I settle myself back into the cushions of the bed and wait expectantly; I've noticed a funny habit that some Nietzscheans have, which is that they won't look at you when they're telling you something serious, unless it's a matter of life or death. Instead they feel they have to keep a close lookout to make sure no one's eavesdropping. I figure that right now, Rhade's about to tell me something about either Dylan, Ylizavetta, or my ship.

I'm not disappointed. "I spoke with Harper just a little while ago," Rhade says. "He knows why your ship was sabotaged."

I sit up a bit. "And?"

Rhade gently pushes me down again. "It was completely an accident," he explains. "Apparently Harper and Trance were planning to do some upgrading in the Maru's engine room as a sort of late birthday present."

"Five weeks late," I mutter under my breath.

He gives me the mild look that is the Nietzschean equivalent of a shrug. "They had a team of mechanics working but still hadn't managed to finish the repairs before Ylizavetta Santiago contacted Dylan, and in the excitement of getting to Earth for peace negotiations, Harper and Trance both forgot that the Maru wasn't in working condition. It was lucky that Harper came with us; if he hadn't been there to know what was going on, you might have ended up with more than a scratched head."

"Yeah." I shudder and turn to face the wall, trying not to think about the impact the Maru could make as it hit the ground straight on – chunks of dirt and metal and dead bodies flying through the air. Instead I turn my thoughts to the fact that Harper and Trance teamed up to do something abysmally stupid and dangerous, yet again. It's something I could almost expect from them on a calculated time scheme. Even though I suppose they haven't done anything really crazy recently. I guess the new gold Trance was just taking some time to warm up.

As if he's reading my thoughts, Rhade says, "This whole incident sounds like something Harper would do. I'm actually rather surprised about Trance. She seems too wise to just forget about the fact that flying your ship could be dangerous."

I turn to look at him again. "Maybe you don't remember that time we visited you on Tarazed a couple years ago, but surely you met Trance when she was still purple."

He thinks for a moment. "I did. She seemed rather fluff-headed."

I snort. "She hasn't really changed all that much. She just turned gold," I say, even though I know it isn't quite true. Rhade raises a skeptical eyebrow but says nothing. I turn away. It's hard to have my little good luck charm all grown up.

The silence draws out. I can't really think of anything to say. My heart is beating quicker than usual, and I can feel Rhade's presence next to me. I feel like I should do something; reach out and take his hand, or put my arm around his waist, or lean on his shoulder, or kiss him. But the silly man won't even let me sit up.

I clear my throat. Rhade shifts his attention from the door to my face. I give him a tiny smile and say the first thing that comes to mind. "You know, I'm getting a weird sense of déjà vu. When I was in a coma after the Abyss took over my mind, I dreamed that you were sitting by my bed, talking to me."

Rhade gives me an odd look. "You did? What did I say?"

I close my eyes, remembering the soft sound of his voice and the warmth of his hand as he tucked a blanket under my chin. "You said you wished I'd wake up, even if it was only to say 'I told you so.'"

I open my eyes again to see that Rhade's odd look is still on his face. "That wasn't a dream," he says.

I stare at him. "It wasn't?" I don't know what to think. If hearing Rhade talking to me wasn't a dream, does that mean that I wasn't dreaming when I heard Harper sitting by my bedside and telling me about all the disgusting things he's eaten and gotten sick from? I almost don't want to know the answer to that.

My thoughts wander inevitably back to Rhade. I watch the play of artificial light on his skin, his hair. Rhade is truly an amazing man. Seriously, after all the crap I've given him, and he still cares about me. It makes me feel guilty. Now has definitely got to be the time to get over my extremely large ego. It's time to break the unspoken family rule: Valentines Don't Apologize.

I take a deep breath. "You know what?" He turns away from the door again and looks back at me. "I think we should start over. There's been a lot of bad stuff between us and I know I have a lot of apologies to make."

Rhade looks vaguely surprised. "Apologies? For what?"

I take a moment to collect my thoughts. What exactly am I trying to apologize for? "Well," I mumble, "for lots of things. Like hating you because of the things Tyr did to me. And the time when I, uh..." I let my sentence trail off. I'm too much of a coward to actually talk about it. So much for being a Valentine, I guess.

He finishes the thought for me. "When you battered me halfway across the Maru and then tried to rip my heart out of my chest with your bare hand?"

I wince. The guilt is gnawing at my insides. "Yeah. That."

Rhade thinks for a moment. What will he say? I can only hope he'll forgive me. I know I haven't given him any cause to. It's amazing what an ass I've been to him. Granted, I don't think much of it was my fault. I mean, the Abyss took over my mind! What could I do? Then again, I talked to Trance after I woke up from the coma and she said she thought the Abyss was feeding off my emotions and amplifying the little bits of unwanted stuff I had locked away in my mind. Does that mean that at some point I hated Rhade? I don't anymore, that's for sure. But what does he really think about me? Is he willing to forgive me for every stupid thing I've done to him? I know Nietzscheans are really good at holding on to grudges . . .

"Apology accepted," Rhade says.

I can't believe it. He actually forgives me? There's more to this man, this Nietzschean, than I would have thought. "Really?" I ask incredulously, sitting up in bed a bit.

He pushes me down again. "Of course. It wasn't your fault. It was a matter of survival."

I can't believe I'm hearing this. I mean, I know Nietzscheans have an obsession with survival, but this . . . How can he attribute my attacking him mindlessly as an issue of survival?

"Survival?" I say skeptically. "What do you mean?"

Rhade shifts slightly on his stool. "The bio armor obviously saw me as threat to your survival, and therefore its survival," he explains. "So it tried to eliminate me. It's fairly logical. I might have done the same in your place."

I'm just about numb with shock now. "Rhade, I almost killed you!"

His face is expressionless. "If you had, you would only have been ensuring your survival."

The thought of killing Rhade to ensure my survival . . . it almost makes me want to cry. How could I waste such a glorious man, even if it meant I could do what Valentines do best . . . survive? It's practically unthinkable!

"I didn't need to kill you to ensure my survival!"

Rhade's face doesn't change. He just looks at me for a few moments, and then he leans forward and gently kisses me on the forehead. I blink away the tears that are trying to come, and spend a few seconds pulling myself back together. Rhade's warm, comforting hand envelops mine, and I look up at him and smile, but it's a bittersweet smile.

"Thank you, Rhade," I say, though I'm not entirely sure what I'm thanking him for. He smiles fleetingly.

"Could I ask a favor of you?" he asks suddenly, frowning a bit.

I would do anything for him.

"Shoot," I say.

"I would like you to promise me two things," he says. "I want you to teach me about human courtship. I know it's different from Nietzschean courtship and it intrigues me to learn new things. And secondly . . ." he pauses, looking me in the eyes. "Secondly, I would like it if you would tell me about yourself. It's amazing how little I know about you, and we've been working together for almost a year."

"But that's part of my charm," I say, grinning at him. He kisses me on the forehead again.

With a crackle of static, a hologram of Andromeda appears on the side of my bed opposite Rhade. She looks absolutely unfazed to see him sitting there.

"Trance has asked me to tell you that you are free to leave," Andromeda says to me. "She says you will have rested long enough and that you are allowed to return to duty, but that you are to refrain from any strenuous exercise for the next few days."

Andromeda turns back to Rhade. "Trance would like you to take care of Beka for a few days to make sure she has healed completely. You're to bring her to Med Deck immediately if she shows signs of faintness or vomiting."

Rhade nods. Andromeda gives me one last look and blinks out.

"Let's go," I say, hopping down from the bed. "I've got orders from Dylan to contact him as soon as I can. I'm going to the conference room. Want to come?" Rhade nods and follows me out into the corridor. We start toward the conference room, walking side by side. We're not walking particularly fast – I have my orders, but I'm not all that interested in watching Dylan argue with a Nietzschean for a few hours. I'd much rather be helping with the repairs on the Maru. Goodness knows my poor baby needs all the help she can get.

I feel Rhade's skin brushing against mine as he reaches to take my hand. I look down to see my fingers comfortably entwined with his, and I can feel my heart beating quicker. I look up again and meet his eyes. He smiles at me, a small but tender smile. Slowly he comes closer to me. I lean in a bit and tilt my face up to his –

- And Trance's voice sounds from one of the wall screens at the intersection of two corridors ahead. "Beka? Rhade? Are you there?" She sounds worried. Rhade and I reluctantly drop our hands and turn toward the screen. "Uh, guys, we've got a problem..."

"What's the matter, Trance?" I ask her.

"Two unmarked slip-fighters just left the planet, and they're heading straight toward us," she says. "Andromeda says they're armed and prepared to launch weapons. I need you in Command right away."

"We're on our way," Rhade says tersely, and we both start running.

We arrive at Command less than a minute later to see Rommie and Trance standing at consoles on either side of the pilot's chair. I hurry to the piloting console and Rhade races toward weapons. "The leading slip-fighter is hailing us," Rommie announces calmly as we step into place.

"On screen," I tell her. "Show us what we've got."

The Commonwealth insignia on the main screen is replaced by the inside of a slip-fighter cockpit. As I get a good look at the person looking calmly at us from the pilot's seat, I realize that she is one of the two most enigmatic people I will ever meet. She's got shimmery silver skin that reminds me of moonlight, and she wears her navy blue hair pinned in loops and curls on the top of her head, with a few loose curls hanging around her face. Her mysterious blue eyes are set off by the stark white of her outfit. But it isn't any one part of this girl's appearance that I find shocking. What is truly astonishing is the fact that she looks like an almost exact copy of my medical officer.

As if to reinforce that thought, the silvery-blue vision looks at the golden alien next to me and says coldly, "I hope you realize that I just spent the last three centuries trying to hunt you down, Trance Gemini. What game are you playing with me?"

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I want to give a really big hug to my new beta-reader, Pyra1. Thank you so much for your help!