"I'm bored," said Achilles as he watched Jack drink his 1000000000000000 bottle of rum.
"I'm sooooooo drunk!" yelled Jack as he danced around with a tree.
"What is it with you and trees?" asked Achilles.
"This ain't no tree! This is my girl Lizabeth!" screamed Jack as he made out with the tree.
"Dude…that is sooo a tree," said Frodo as he watched everyone get drunk. He had pretended to get drunk so he could later pick pocket all of them and then run away with their money and get a place in Gondor.
"Frodo! I love you!" cried Sam as he hugged a nearby mailbox.
"I hate you!" yelled Frodo as he knocked Sam out and stole all his money.
"FRODO BAGGINS! DO NOT TAKE ME FOR SOME CHEAP CONJURER OF SOMETHING I CAN'T REMEMBER! YOU HAVE TO GO ON SOME LAME MISSION TO DESTROY THE RING OF POWER!" yelled Gandalf as he smacked Frodo upside the head with his staff. Frodo fell over unconscious. Gandalf then began to yell at the grass because he thought it was Frodo.
"Yo! Sup everyone? You all ready to come to my fo shizzle party?" asked Bilbo as he came disco dancing up the hill. Everyone looked at him and then screamed. "What's wrong with you people?"
"Yo we're sooo drunk!" said Paris as he jumped into Hector's pants.
"Dude…Bilbo! Sup!" asked Gandalf suddenly.
"Dude…Gandalf the ring is mine! And now I'm gonna put it on and disappear with it! Mwahahahahahaha!" yelled Bilbo as he put on a plastic fake ring and began running around in circles.
"Bilbo…the ring is on the ground…wait the ring is on the ground! Ahh!" screamed Gandalf as he grabbed the ring and threw it in the fire.
"What are you doing!" asked Frodo as he threw a bottle of rum at Jack who was now break dancing with his tree.
"I'm trying to show you all the beautiful writing on the ring!" screamed Gandalf as he jumped into the fire. "I got the ring!"
"YAY!" yelled everyone when they saw the ring.
"What does it say?" asked Achilles who was now actually interested.
"It says: 3 rings for the Elvish dudes who don't drink rum
5000000000 rings for dwarves who are stupid
200000000000000 rings for men who are really good cooks
and 23 rings for that dude Sauron on his coolio throne.
"Dude…that is sooo not what it says," said Frodo as he attempted to steal the ring.
Anyway….you'll all have to tune in later for the next chapter cuz I don't wanna write anymore…plus I'm in computers class and I don't have much time left…
