Lucky Me
Chapter 056
If homicide was ever made a sport, Chris and Alexis' heads would be mounted on my wall.
Chris, big surprise, right?
But Alexis, little human Alexis, what had she done? She was responsible for making me sit through a perfect nightmare. Stephen King would stand in awe of this! This got a new freaking rating higher than 'R' if ever it was made into a movie!
"Come to the Lock In," she said, "It'll be fun." For who! For him? For his interest? I was so mad…but let me start at the beginning.
I'd say it started with Chris.
Chris was a little instigator. After three more days of flickering lights and rebooting computers from lack of electricity, I waited like a cat (with two big black wings) for him to leave the his room to take a shower. I thought I would have to wait a few months, but no, he actually headed that way about an hour after I decided on this course of action.
So here the master thief in training (me) was making the oh so long journey to his door (all of seven feet) via tiptoeing (no really, I was) and Mr. Remy rounded the steps at this time and I froze.
"What you doin'?"
"Uh," Breaking into Chris' room didn't sound smart, but neither did the image of me with one foot raised in the air my toes pointed down and the other on the ground. "I-I heard that r-rats love noise so I'm trying not to distract them?"
I watched him, and when he started to laugh at me I unfroze and forced myself into a more natural pose with hands on hips.
"You need to learn to lie." He continued to chuckle as he went to his room. I stuck my tongue out at his back.
I walked to Chris' door and turned the knob, but wouldn't you know? The little beast of burden locked his door? Where was the trust?
Better yet, where was the Cajun? I smiled as I called Mr. Remy. He only started to laugh again as I asked him to help me learn how to break into a bedroom.
"You cute enough to have dem invite you in."
I shivered at that mental image.
"Yeah, right." Without another question, Mr. Remy worked the lock for two seconds with his pick and the door swung open. "Thanks." I waved, as I went in.
"Just don't take anyt'ing big." And with that he went back to his room.
Chris' room was lit by hanging Christmas lights of purple and green (Halloween anyone?) so I tripped over his clothes and other junk. There was electric thingies all over the place. Most of them had their 'insides' on the 'out' and divided up into neat (well…as neat as they could be in this mess!) piles.
What was he up to in here?
"Hey, Chris!" I heard him talking to Chris and my heart started to run around in my chest in a blind panic. Oh crap! He didn't take as long as I had thought (okay, hoped!) and I was in his room still! That really stunk (no, really his room smelled like corn nuts and burnt hair)!
If I was smart, if I had a functioning brain and if my fear didn't have me going 'what do they do on the movies?' I would have headed to the window and flew out. I didn't do this. Nope, instead I did the really dumb thing—I crawled under his bed!
I wasn't sure if I wanted to cry or laugh. My wings were close to my body and weren't visible from the doorway (I prayed). Once I saw his bare feet come in, the door shut, and the towel hit the floor I had this great urge to claw my way through the floor. I squeezed my eyes tightly together. I did not want an eyeful of unexpected surprises.
After forever, I peeked and saw the bottom of his jeans over his bare feet. Oh thank goodness. He was dressed! I would have sighed in relief but that would have given me away. The last thing I needed to do was provide this guy with ammo and odd ideas about me.
But then again, maybe those odd ideas weren't so wrong. I was hiding under his bed for crying out loud and after breaking into his room. The only thing to do was to wait until he left to go to the bathroom again. I'd wiggle my way out then and laugh about this later (like on my death bed).
But something elsehappened. Someone came to his door. I heard a knock and watched as his feet made their way from the desk covered in electrical 'guts' to the door and then saw a pair of painted toe nailed feet walk in, giggle and the door was shut and locked behind her.
Daisy-Mae.
I was more surprised then, well, whatever else I could be at that moment. And then?
Then the reality came slamming into me like a ton of Sugar cookies (with icing on top-and sprinkles, couldn't forget the sprinkles!).
A boy and a girl were in a room together.
A room with a bed.
A room with a locked door and a bed.
And me under the bed, in the locked room with the boy and the girl.
Please, please, please let my gutter-mind way of thought be wrong!
Then I heard the bed creak, I saw the back of their heels. If they were observant they'd probably feel my shaky breath on the back of their legs, but they were doing something that kept them distracted. I didn't want to think about it. As long as their feet were on the floor I was happy. Even though the weight on the bed caused the mattress to press down on me.
Then I felt someone lift and drop a few times on the mattress, I had to cover my mouth with my hand to keep from grunting at being used as a trampoline.
"Your bed got lumpy." D-M continued to test it out by bouncing on the darn thing. There was going to be a Kookie hole on his hardwood floor if she didn't stop that or my gallbladder was going to be coughed up.
"Really? Huh, must be because they're so cheap around here."
Good, they were talking. Nothing ever started with talking.
I thought so at least.
Another question popped into my head like a mutated and angry flower under the sun of fear, why didn't Jean say anything about their inner team relationship?
Then I heard another knock, I prayed that it was someone to drag them both away, but nooo my luck was holding out (as in still being bad).
"Come on in Adam." Adam? What was he doing here? Don't tell me this was some disgusting-ack! Mind out of the gutter! Telepaths didn't pay for cable, they got free 'shows' in my head!
"Hey guys, what's up?" Ow! Did he have to sit on the bed, too? Ouch. "And why the secret meeting in the dead of night?"
Ten o'clock was not the dead of night, might be the dead of Kookie if Adrian popped in, but not the dead of night. Professor was going to get a big surprise when I went crashing into his office from being pushed so hard into the floor.
Wings didn't help.
"We got to get Adrian out of office, he's driving me crazy," Chris started. I felt like clamping my hands over my ears but I couldn't, one was smashed under my stomach while the other was still clamped over my mouth. "Kerry's the only one that actually does a half a-" I was not going to relate that word, "job."
"Adrian is weaker than a new born lamb. He doesn't tell us what to do. "
"Well, it isn't like Blyt is Miss Dominatrix," Adam argued lightly, if I wasn't blushing then, then I was going to be, "But she def has the outfit for it."
Adam! I started to bang my head lightly on the floor.
"So what are we goin' to do?" D-M chimed in.
"Give her a whip and some stilettos."
There was a sharp sound of flesh hitting flesh.
"Get your mind back here, hon."
"What else can we do? Xavier won't hear us out. He's got a power problem." Chris sighed and I heard the bed creak, he must have laid back. "And we can't talk to Kerry; she's got her head so rammed up Scott's butt-"
I resented that!
D-M made a noise. "Yeah, that's true but at least she's got a reason. Adrian just wants to kiss Cyke's butt all the time to avoid gettin' in trouble with the other prisses in power."
I wonder if Adrian's ears were ringing.
"The only plausible conclusion would be to conduct ourselves in such an illogical, non-functioning way that they would have to reinstate her."
Then there was silence, me personally, would have whipped out my trusty dictionary to translate just what the heck he just said. Adam was too smart for someone so young...then again, maybe I was too dumb for someone my age.
"Duh," Came Chris' reply. Duh was good, duh I understood with no problem.
"Ah guess," whoa, country coming out of the D-M! "We can just like, completely ignore him or something in training sessions."
"Just blow off his directions?"
"Yeah, ain't that a good idea?" She asked sweetly (like the sweetly before they chased you around the house swinging a knife at your back).
"Actually it is." I could almost feel Chris' smile. "You had one successful idea, congrads, you met your quota for the year."
Gag.
"Come on, Kookie!" Scott shouted from down the stairs. I grumbled and threw the last of my stuff into the back pack. "They'll lock you out."
Oh, and I was supposed to cry? Alexis owed me big for this! She mentioned the lock in a week and some days ago, what she didn't mention was it was actually a middle school lock in with high school 'role models' to baby sit the brats. Not only was I doped into doing this 'as a friend' but Mr. Drake also convinced other sponsors.
I thought it would be great if Mr. Remy or Mr. Logan was some of the 'volunteers' but they weren't. Dang it! And the ones who were available got roped in after Scott and Jean wanted to do the parent thing and spend quality time with me (and about 150 other people who were probably celebrating their escape from parenthood for a night). Stacey was recruited—and ex-prostitute who still dressed and acted the part, what part of that was good role model material? Paige was a candidate but considering she was barely older than me (and complete jail bait to Mr. Warren) she was turned down. It was 3 'men' and 3 'women' as far as that goes (and in some cases, only technically male).
Oh, no worries, I wasn't the only teen to be roped. My entire team also decided to go to this oh so fun thing. Alexis owed me super big.
I hefted my backpack up and got down the steps (stomping down them) and met with an impatient Scott.
But enough of the boring prep work let me get down to the nightmare. First off, I was one of the first ones there (Scott was painfully punctual, I was not). Alexis was chatting with an older man who I guessed was her dad. Then she spotted me and dragged him over to us.
"Hey, girl!"
I felt Scott and Jean (actually heard them bickering about something) come up behind me.
"This is my dad, Reverend Moses Mickle." I had excellent control over my jaw (either that or the gum I had been chewing on was so sticky it glued my teeth together) not to let it drop in surprise. Mr. Mickle smiled and said he heard a lot about me. Mostly good.
"And these are…?"
Uh, good question.
"T-T-this is uhm, my pa-er, Mr. and Mrs. Su-these are my-" Understand my dilemma? I didn't want to say 'Scott and Jean' and hurt their feelings…I guess. And I didn't want to say 'Dad and Jean' and freak them out along with me (and possibly hurt Jean's feelings) and 'Dad and Mom' might cause them to get that weird look again. No, I never called Jean mom, she's not bloodthirsty enough remember?
Although for a split second I had an almost irresistible urge to go, 'This is Barbie and Ken.'
"We are Kookie's parents," Jean cut in. "I'm Jean and this is my husband Scott." When they went into adult parent lingo Alexis snuck me away. The gym was getting pretty full by then. Mr. Drake and Miss Reese had shown up with the 'volunteers' from the mansion in tow.
"Can you believe it?" Alexis scoffed, "Reese almost has her spinsteresque claws in Drake." She frowned and turned to me. "And I was going to marry him!" I rolled my eyes; something caught her attention over my shoulder, "Oh and look at that. Dis-gus-ting!"
I looked where she was looking and saw Nikki-Jo hanging on Adrian's arm and a fussy Chris trying to fend away a clingy D-M.
"Yeah," I said to her comments on both couples. "Big deal. I don't have time to babysit."
"So you keep saying, girl." Alexis looked over to where my parents were getting important looking clipboards with white-out designs on the backsides. "Your parents must have started pretty early."
"Huh?"
"They had you at, what? 10 and 12?"
I faltered. "I-I was adopted by them!"
"Oh, that explains it, doesn't it?" She sighed dramatically, "and it makes it just so boring."
The night got on a 'roll' by nine and there were hyperness and (according to Stacey) hormones radiating of the 'kids'.
I got stuck with the eighth graders who were going through that 'I-know-everything' stage (it was just lucky for them I was going through that 'there-are-too-many-witnesses' stage). I was with Alexis, Adrian, Bobby-Jerk ("Mr. Bob since it was the weekend") Miss Reese and Nikki. There were more girls than boys and therefore more female 'chaperons'. Stacey was going crazy muttering about image inducers and teenage hormones.
Mr. Mickle had some of the 'responsible' males come to our side. This meant Adrian and 'Mr. Bob'. The junior high boys were upset to lose a 'sports star' but got over it quickly when they started to pick on Scott.
Mr. Military Man was losing it to a bunch of kids!
Good thing he decided not to wear his 'cool' X-Men uniform (spandex wedgies anyone?).
"Okay, now let's start to have some fun." Alexis chirped.
The couples were busy with each other and I tried my hardest to ignore him as he relentlessly flirted with his girl of interest. Me, Alexis and Stacey started handing out whatever it was that we had to give them. The stuff was in a little plastic bag.
When it was time for nametags, one of the smart aleck girls asked where they wanted the sticker nametags put, Stacey sweetly responded, "Over your mouth?" They didn't mess with Stacey anymore.
Wish I had been that clever.
I searched the gym with my eyes for the other people from the mansion. Jean was having a blast with the sixth graders it seemed, they kept gawking at her hair (or her chest, I was not sure) as Scott looked like he was finally relaxing with the same group. Adam and Chris were goofing off and I saw that Adam's name tag wasn't where-oh my, well, let's just say his name tag with 'gecko' on it ended up on his pants (you do the math, I was not saying another word). And Mr. Jean-Paul was saying something (probably none too nice either) as another kid wowed over his ears.
After embarrassing myself by telling one girl (who I thought was a boy) to go to the boys' locker room and getting into a dispute with her, the 8th graders were ready to sit down and stay up all night.
But anyway, the sleep attire chosen for this lovely get together was then put on a fashion walkway.
No, seriously. Each group voted for three people from their group to get up and do a 'walkway' type show to everyone else in the center of the gym. Three kids and two chaperons.
Nikki was wearing something that I was afraid if she sneezed (or breathed too deeply) would leave her embarrassed. Really who wore that to a middle school imprisonment party? But then Miss Reese came sashaying out wearing almost the identical thing (only in a larger size, but I wouldn't tell her that-I didn't need to flunk Home Ec.).
Oh, as for my sleepwear? I wore my lovely Stitch sleeping pants Jean gave me and I had (aren't I cruel?) his shirt on. I think I might have 'accidentally' grabbed it from the laundry (but I could have done it on purpose) because I might have felt annoyed knowing his interest was going to be at this thing. His face was priceless when I came lumbering out (dragging two of the girls with me who had gotten into a toothpaste war-which the remnants of the war could be found in their hair) in this get up his mouth slackened and eyes enlarged.
I smirked, his mouth snapped shut and his eyes going straight for the girl drooling over him.
Throwing myself ungracefully on the ground next to the, heh, simpler girl who still didn't have her name tag on right, I about gagged when I heard: "Vote for Mr. Drake, I want to see him strut!" followed by a chorus of giggles and 'mm-hmms'.
None of them came from me! I didn't even think like that!
When the 'show' was over they settled back into the groups and the next fun thing was pulled out. We had to sit in a circle (Indian style) and held the people's hands around us. As luck would have it, I got to sit between him and his little 'interest'.
"Now, the object of this 'game'." Alexis rolled her eyes and my stomach decided to become a black hole and suck out my breath. "Is to look at those around you and take turns saying something nice about that person."
Oh great, group therapy.
By the time I heard, "Okay, Kookie, your turn." I just got 'complemented' by his girl that I had nice hair. I guessed I did if you liked the black and shaggy look. "First say something to her, and then to him."
"Uh," I had to think of something and quick. Quick was not in my action listings. I stared blankly at her, 'thanks for taking my guy away, gee I really like that about you'? No, he was never technically my guy, and he ran to her. I think, I wasn't sure anymore. My understanding of this whole situation was still kinda fuzzy. "You have a real talent-at-with, uh, making friends?"
She smiled at me and I felt sick and numb at the same time. I was just waiting for Barney to pop up and start singing that dumb 'I love you' song.
I turned to him, "You," are an insensitive, arrogant, womanizing jerk who didn't deserve to even hold my hand-
And then he lightly squeezed it and I felt my resentment ebb.
"You-," nice smile? Nice eyes? Nice laugh? Can make me laugh like no one else (even if it was at myself)? Nice behind (according to my Grandmother's observations, not my own!)? I felt a smile crack my face, "have the most impressive cowlick I have ever seen."
The group busted out laughing and I felt some of my uneasiness at having him looking at me so intently wash away. Without waiting for the girls to stop their giggling he quickly said, "And you have the most incredible green eyes I have ever looked into." The last two words were spoken quietly and I felt a blush creep across my face.
"Isn't he a sweetheart?" his girl whispered into my ear when he turned to compliment one of the other girls on something. There was no guessing that in her voice was a strong warning that said 'hands-off'.
Where's the nightmare? Try to see this through a hurt teenage girl's eyes. I was holding hands with both him, the guy I thought sort of cared for me and my replacement who he undoubtly liked.
Worse yet, it wasn't even my fault that our rel-whatever was fell through! He got jealous over Chris! Chris who was growing a mutant population of dust bunnies under his bed. Chris! Who threw himself on his bed, and even bounced when he tried to get comfortable (I spent a very long time under that guy's bed!). I turned my attention to the one sitting across from me and glared at the girl, she paled.
Whoops.
I was going to pick up the coke machine and ram it through the door.
If it hadn't been bolted down to the floor.
It ate my money! I knew that we had all food and drinks supplied to us thanks to the school, but I couldn't stomach any more Hawaiian Punch or Graham crackers. I wanted Coke! I wanted chocolate! I wanted real junk food! But the dumb machine ate my money!
So I did the pure outraged human thing, I kicked it, shook it, and called it every name in the book. My book was PG-13 rated.
The mocking machine was on the hallway on the side of the gym, so that's how I could get to it without breaking the rules of the lock in.
I banged my head on its glass surface and wondered if Jean would be willing to break the dumb thing for me. I heard the double doors leading to the gym open and then click shut (loudly).
"They're about to start the next event."
It was him. I felt my face start to get hot. I could be big and brave in front of people, but alone still made me nervous; even though he made it quite clear he wanted nothing from me!
"Uh, thanks?"
"That's a nice shirt you got on there."
Oh man, time to lie. "It belonged to this jealous thick headed guy I used to think I knew."
"I guess I," sweet smile, "…he deserved that."
"We better get back." I tipped my nose in the air as I walked past him, "Wouldn't want your little lady to worry." I put my hands on the rods which opened the door-
Or at least that was what they were supposed to do.
I tried the door again, this time with a little more strength. Feeling really dumb I went to the other door and tried it.
Both were locked.
This was not good.
"Something the matter?"
"Uh, I don't know-yet." I looked sheepishly at him and he even tried the doors but came to the same conclusion. "We're locked in—or out."
I was in a not okay attitude at this time so I shot something out of my mouth, "What, you think I would lie about the door being locked while you were in here with me?"
Something, I want to say hurt, made a quick jog across his face before being replaced by annoyance.
"I would never think you'd be smart enough to think of that."
CPR! I think he just sucked the air out of me.
I sighed, "Maybe if we-"
Then came the most obnoxious noise in the world, 'We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together' was blasting throughout the gym so loud it shook the doors. Ah dang, there went my idea of banging on the doors.
"Oh yeah, did I forget to tell you?" he smirked as I gave him a cold look over my shoulder, "Karaoke is starting."
"They'll never hear us with the music that loud." I huffed, wanting to scream in frustration. Sliding down the wall next to the wicked vending machines I leaned my head back. What kind of cruel fate was this that I got stuck with him for who knew how long?
A few weeks ago, I would have loved this turn of events but I was being stubborn about making up. It didn't help that he was also probably making out with a new girl now.
He followed my example and slumped down across from me and in front of the doors, "Can't you just use your powers?"
I rolled my eyes, "And how are we going to explain how locked doors got dented by just opening them?" He gave me a tired look, this was only getting worse. It was late and both of us were starting to feel the weariness from not sleeping. "What about your powers?"
"Even harder to explain."
I sighed, and the music kept blasting on.
Around the time someone was doing a horrible rendition of 'I Will Always Love You' heand I made our way to the furthest part of the hall. The music was loud and the hall carried a very irritating echo.
"You probably hate my guts." I guess he couldn't stand the silence (as much as screeching singers allowed there to be silence).
I looked over at him. "I don't hate you." I replied flatly, disheartened.
"Then you strongly dislike my guts?"
"No." I gave him n warm, fake smile. "I 'strongly dislike' your entire person."
He sighed and smiled at the same time.
"Good ole Kookie humor." He was lying stretched out on the floor and I thought he'd give up trying to talk to me, wrong. "It's been a month; can't we just forget what happened?"
For some unknown reason, that stung. I didn't mean like bee sting, more like a thousand paper cuts in the same spot until it hit bone type stung.
"I'm trying, but you keep pulling stunts like you did earlier."
He suddenly became the poster boy for innocence. "What did I do?"
"You know what you did! And in front of your own girlfriend!"
He snorted and folded his arms under his head, some part of my mind prayed he put on deodorant the hall already smelled funny. "It was part of the game. I was supposed to compliment you, and I did."
"You were flirting!"
"Uh-huh, and why, when I have a girl who hangs on my every word," this time I made a noise of disgust and disbelief, "would I want one who always fights, insults, and teases me?"
"I thought you liked a challenge," I replied weakly, "Guess you just don't have the endurance for it."
He didn't respond at first. He turned his face toward me, and in a serious voice finally stated, "She's not my girlfriend."
"It's about time!" he said as we were finally let out of the hall around one in the morning.
D-M didn't look as shy as she was trying to, "Sorry." After he had gone in the direction of our group, D-M snatched me away. "So?"
"So?" I asked, yawning rudely in her face.
"Did you two work it out? You've been pretty down in the mouth since hell week…" She drawled off. "So Ah thought locking you two together would help."
My mind clicked two or three times before it hit me, "Huh? You locked us together on purpose?"
She scoffed. "Oh come on, like you really missed anything. Just a bunch of kids bouncing around screaming."
She was lucky I wasn't leader anymore; I would severely put her through the 'ringer'.
Imagine! Her having the nerve to mettle in my non-existent love life!
Er, never mind, I just shot myself down like a fat turkey before Thanksgiving.
After mentally making a note to destroy D-M's love life as soon as a chance made itself available, she had already done it!
Chris had switched places with his (ya know, his-his, not Chris') girl but non-girlfriend and was not too happy with teenager girls in general. Apparently they had a fight, must be a bug going around.
"This is the last hour of the lock in, and pretty soon you'll be able to go home and sleep." I blinked heavily. My mind was on one planet while my brain-uh, I mean my body was on earth (but even that's questionable). I was so tired. "And for out last activity, we are going to hand out awards."
So we all got papers and pens and started to write down who would be most likely or most un-likely to do whatever it is that we thought. By this time I didn't really care (yes, I sorta did at the beginning) and just marked off various people as whatever in the first empty slot.
"Okay, now, let's tally these up." Alexis must have some pep pills somewhere. As she sat down with two others from the 'heads' of our group, I yawned.
"I know what you mean," he said covering up his own yawn with the back of his hand. "I'm glad we won't have to do this again, all this estrogen is starting to make me go crazy."
Stacey gave a short laugh.
"Like you have real big problems with your reaction to the girls." She could 'see' what they were 'feeling' with their hormones, so I felt either shocked or triumphant when the words came with a knowing smile, "Unless you count black wings beside you, you can't seem to keep yourself from noticing her, hm?"
My jaw did not drop; it drew into a happy grin.
By this time Alexis began to announce what everyone 'won', mine was "Most likely to punch someone for calling her fat". Wasn't that a certificate you wanted to frame?
It was the middle of the week (okay Thursday, stop getting technical!) when I was sitting dumbfounded in front of the computer I had been writing a report on for English (pure of b.s.).
So I stood, dumbfounded in front of a boy I thought I knew-at least partially.
"C-could you repeat that?"
He sighed heavily, "It's not like I mean it!" He threw his hands up in the air, "Just answer yes or no?"
I blinked in reply.
He glared at me; hey he was lucky I could still blink!
Chris shot me another annoyed glare, "Would. You. Go. To. Prom. With. Me."
I blinked again.
He muttered under his breath, "please?"
I blinked.
