Title: Obvious Heart
Rating: PG/PG: 13
Pairings: McKay/Weir/Sheppard
Genre: Angst/Romance Songfic
Author's Note: Not much else to say other than before. I hope you like this last part and please review!
Disclaimer: I own the story. The characters are © of MGM and the lyrics belong to Finger Eleven ("Obvious Heart").
Distribution: WeirMcKayship
The corners of Rodney McKay's lips curled downward as he studied the intricate Ancient device resting on the table below him. He was blissfully unbothered by the other scientists. It had only taken him a few sharp comments to the others before they got the point: he was in a very bad mood. Had his disposition been better, he would've inwardly sniggered each time they skirted around the table.
"D-D-Doctor McKay?" he looked up to see another scientist. It took a long moment for Rodney to connect her face to a name: Dr. Kusinagi. "I brought you some coffee," the woman set down the mug near him as she spoke, looking at him with hopeful eyes.
"Don't you have something better to do?" Rodney snapped at her. As she scurried away he looked back to the device, taking a sip of the coffee as he did so.
And full of yourself
No need to explain
To anyone else
Dr. Zelenka looked over at Rodney from his own desk and sighed. Rodney had been at work on that thing since the crack of dawn. Normally that sort of thing only happened if it was remotely interesting. But Rodney was only examining a keypad that they'd found on one of the doors. Zelenka sighed. Recently, Rodney had been acting rather, well…odd. He looked over at the other man to find him staring hollowly at a wall, lost in thought. This was not typical Rodney behavior. If he didn't know better, he would've thought that Rodney was…depressed.
Broken in time
Taken what's left
Depressed? Zelenka pondered the thought. Rodney had been like this for several days; ever since Valentine's Day. 'It's probably just a coincidence,' Zelenka thought to himself, but he couldn't stop the thought from bugging him. 'Or maybe…Maybe he got up the courage to tell Elizabeth.' Zelenka supposed that he was the only one on base that knew. Not that Rodney had told him: it'd been the little stares and the conversations that had given him suspicion. Thinking of their friendship in a new light led him seeing things that could be contained in the realm of 'more than friends'. "Hey, Rodney," Zelenka said, walking over to McKay. The other scientists had long since left to go and eat lunch, leaving the room empty. "What's going on?"
"What do you mean?" Rodney said, his voice rough.
"You know what I mean," Zelenka replied.
"Nothing's wrong. Don't you have anything better to do with your time than watch people?" Rodney asked sharply and Zelenka was taken aback, surprised that Rodney had noticed him staring.
"You're a real dupiash 1 when you're upset, you know that?" Zelenka asked him, receiving a glare in response. Before Rodney could open his mouth again, Zelenka cut him off. "It's about Elizabeth, isn't it?"
Rodney shifted in his chair, avoiding Zelenka's eyes for a minute before answering. "It's none of your business." However, in those five words he minus well have simply said 'yes', for the answer laid in his shifting eyes and wavering voice.
No need to deny
The cause or effect
Rodney pushed his chair away from the table and stood. "I'm going to go eat," he told Zelenka, anxious to get out of the room. To his surprise, the Czech scientist did not try and stop him as he walked out of the room. Rodney shrugged it off, and instead concentrated on his rhythmic steps. He glanced down at his watch, pondering. How long had it been since he'd eaten something? A rumble in his stomach confirmed that it had been a while.
Ten minutes later, McKay was seated near the back corner of the mess hall, chewing absentmindedly on the power bar he'd unwrapped after his short meal. The seats around him were empty, and he assumed they would stay that way. No one had even attempted to sit down next to him so far. Gossip traveled almost as fast, if not faster, on Atlantis as on Earth, so he supposed that news of his mood had already traveled. That or no one wanted to sit next to him, either choice was fair game. Rodney put his cheek on his hand, looking at the other people. It seemed like he was observing another species. The smiles, the laughing… Rodney cracked the knuckles on his other hand in the silence.
This heart is not a broken one
But where have all the colors gone?
Rodney frowned as a female laugh reached his ears. He lifted his head, looking around the room. He knew that laugh…how could he not? It belonged to Elizabeth. McKay rubbed his forehead with his fingers as he searched for her. This was useless, he knew. It would only serve to torment her further. But, for one little second, just a glimpse of her would put his troubles to rest. It was a brief second, but worth all of the torture he went through afterward for it.
It's still among the lucky ones
The moment Rodney saw her, instead of his heart soaring, it plummeted. There she was, walking into the mess hall…with John Sheppard. Yes, Rodney and John were friends—as 'friends' as it could get between their opposite personalities, anyway. They owed each other their lives, and that created an unspoken bond. But still…in that moment Rodney envied him. There was John, standing next to Elizabeth, smiles on both of their faces.
This heart is not a broken one
But where have all the colors gone?
You're still among the lucky ones
And burning longer than the sun
Dr. McKay looked down at the table immediately, feeling like an intruder into a private scene. His fingers clutched around the remainder of his power bar, his heart beating faster. A part of him pleaded helplessly that what he'd just seen didn't mean anything…but the rational part of him won over. Just as it'd always had. He knew, just by the little tilt of her head, the extra second her smile stayed on her face, the faint twinkle in her eye…she was in love…with John. Rodney leaned back against the wall, allowing his eyes to shut briefly as if it could shield him from everything. His state was interrupted, however, a moment later.
"Are you all right Rodney?" Rodney waited a moment before he opened his eyes, knowing that Elizabeth had come over. She was sitting across from him, a concerned look on her face. Rodney looked at her, taking in every detail of her face. It tempted him to tell her everything. Shouldn't she know? It was only fair for her to know.
"I'm fine," Rodney replied instead. He continued to look at her, pondering whether or not to tell her his true feelings. 'I should…I need to,' he thought. Their friendship had always been like that: no secrets between them. How would Elizabeth feel if she had been left out of this detail? But no matter how hard he tried, Rodney kept his mouth shut. He knew telling Elizabeth would stress her; make her feel guilty, and that was one thing he didn't want to do. Sitting here, close enough to bask in her beauty, being her friend; that was enough for him. With her, he was numb to the pain. Why would he try and jeopardize that?
Cause there's a remedy close
In a familiar dose
Elizabeth hesitated, looking at Rodney, biting her lip. She was worried about him. They hadn't talked in days. What was wrong? The question nagged at her. Several of the scientists had approached her with details of his behavior, and she knew something was up. Sure, Rodney was sarcastic all of the time, but never quite so much as this. Something had stung him, and she wanted to know what it was. Rodney was her friend, and she'd do almost anything to put a smile on his face. "Rodney…" she said, pausing for a brief moment, "What's wrong?"
"What do you mean?" Rodney replied evasively, shifting in his seat.
Elizabeth sighed softly. "I know something is wrong, Rodney. Please," her expressive eyes pleaded for her, "I care about you a lot. I want to help you."
Now you can find out who knows
Soaking the truth that she says
In taken chances
Rodney opened his mouth, but shut it and looked up as Major Sheppard appeared over his shoulder. He looked the same; the same ruffled, just-got-out-of-bed appearance, the same attitude, but there was something different…some airiness to his step. Rodney knew the cause for it all too well. He clamped his mouth shut and looked back at Elizabeth. "Honestly, I'm fine Elizabeth," he insisted, crossing his fingers beneath the table, "I don't know what you're worried about," he added in a near whisper as Sheppard sat down next to her, setting his food down on the table. Rodney stood up. "I've got to go run some experiments," he said. He cared for Elizabeth, yes, but watching her and John together…it was far more than he could handle. "I'll talk to you later."
Elizabeth watched him walk off silently, her eyes wide and confused. "Bye, Rodney," she called after him, a faint trace of worry in her face.
Rodney ran a hand over his head as he started to walk out of the mess hall. He was so preoccupied with what had just happened that he nearly ran over Zelenka. The other scientist looked at him, a perplexed look on his face. "Rodney-" he began.
"I can't talk now," Rodney tried to brush past him, but Zelenka, in a bold move, reached out, grasping Rodney's forearm.
"Why didn't you tell her?" he asked, watching Rodney's eyes widen. "You had a perfect chance. She needs to know, Rodney."
After digesting the fact that Zelenka had figured out he had a thing for Elizabeth, Rodney came back to his senses. "I've got to get back to the lab," he muttered, shoving Zelenka's arm off of him with remarkable force.
"You didn't answer my question!" Zelenka yelled after him, and Rodney turned around.
"I can't," he replied, spilling more of his heart in those two words than he'd ever confided to the Czech before. With that, Rodney turned, walking quickly out of the mess hall before the other man could stop him once more. Alone at last, he pondered his own words. He couldn't tell Elizabeth how he felt… She would feel guilty. It would ruin her blossoming relationship with John; something that lighted her eyes with happiness. Rodney cared far too much for her than to destroy her happiness with tales of his insignificant feelings. As long as Elizabeth was happy, he was okay.
And if being with John was what made Elizabeth happy, then he would keep his mouth shut about his feelings.
The End
(1) Dupiash: Slovak for asshole. I'm not sure if this is the correct spelling, but it should be close.
Author's Note: I hope you guys enjoyed! I'm considering making a sort-of sequel in the near future (and gasp! with a happy ending!) but we'll see how it goes. :) Anyway...please review!
Reviewers:
Margaret: You're brillant! Lol you gave me an idea with the suggestions...hmm... Perhaps I'll write an alternate ending or something. I was considering keeping this the way it is and starting a long story sort of based on it. Perhaps I'll use one of your ideas...if that's all right with you, that is! Thank you so much for the compliments!
PurpleYin: Ah, but I can! Teehee. :) I'm evil at heart. Thanks for the review:) Hope you liked this chapter as well!
