SLAYERS: WARPED
Nayru: (cough) ... I should probably continue this now.
Chapter 4: C'est Moi Seul Baise
Rei jitterishly held herself straight. She was trying to remain calm. Her hair had been tied into a high bun, and she was dressed in a skimpy waitress' outfit. The bar she was in was scruffy-looking, the type of place ruffians and bandits would dine. The food was cheap and bad, and the place was dirty. It wasn't the type of place she'd imagined her mother-figure dining. Older-Zelgadis was watching her every move from the back of the restaurant they had "borrowed". He was holding the workers hostage.
"They will be here in a minute." Zelgadis murmured. Rei nodded. "You will serve them, and I will see to it that Gourry and Lina's relationship starts to unravel."
"Why are you making me do this...?" Rei whispered weakly.
"So you can watch your own undoing." He replied nonchalantly. At that second, the Slayers gang entered- with three people Rei knew very well.
"This is not the type of place I'd see anyone related to Rei eating." Alin confided to Elijah.
"Rei with perfect manners and fine tastes? I couldn't see her eating anywhere I've seen here!"
"What are you two chattering about?" Zel grumbled brashly.
"Nothing!" They both squeaked.
"This is my favorite restaurant in town! I'm glad it's still open." Lina sighed wearily.
Kinsei rolled her eyes. "I'm just glad we're going to sit for a meal. I'm starving."
"You're not starving until you're keeled over with hunger." Filia snorted rather coldly.
"Are we just going to hang in the doorway?" Amelia whined.
"No." Zel opened the door for Amelia. The group entered in a mass. A short female with red hair was standing at the hostess' podium, staring into space. She had the nervous look of a fawn surrounded by hunters with lights shining into her eyes. Alin stepped to the front of the group, right next to Lina.
"Hey kid, can we get a greeting or something?" The hostess continued to stare into space, her eyes drifting across the gathered.
"Excuse me, miss." Alin calmly pressed a hand under her ear. She looked directly at him, snapping out of his.
"J'liketableboothhowmanyinparty-"
"Please, miss, space bar and punctuations." Alin interrupted politely. He realized the odd stare he was recieving from Lina and the others. "Erm, I mean-"
"Sorry. I meant, how many in your party and would like like a table or a booth?"
"There are- one two three... Xel and Chocolate disappeared again, great- eight of us, right?" She turned to Alin.
"You five, us three." He nodded.
"Eight. We'd like a table, preferably in a corner." The girl nodded.
"This way please." She led them to a table set for ten in a corner, and gave them each menus. As soon as she vanished into the back room, Kinsei and Elijah burst out laughing, and Alin blushed furiously, his skin going from blue to purple.
"You did the Rei thing with that waitress!" Kinsei laughed.
"She looks a lot like Rei, and I figured that everyone has that behind-the-ear pressure point..."
"Rei, his girlfriend?" Amelia asked, blinking.
"How forgetful are you, Amelia? Rei's who we're looking for!" Filia exclaimed.
"Oh yeah. You say the waitress looks like her?" Amelia frowned in thought.
"Spitting image, I swear it!" Alin nodded vigorously.
"I dunno. Rei wouldn't ever dress like that."
"And what a dress it was! Even for such a small-built girl, wow!" Gourry shouted. "I could see her pretty blue panties." He smiled cheerfully. Lina thwapped him.
"Calm yourself, Rei..." Rei whispered to herself. "You must remain calm... this is just your first time ever seeing your birth parents... which ones did he say were mine?!" Rei peered out at the Slayers again. "Lina... and... the blonde one... Gourry... wow, he looks so happy! And Lina... my mom... why is she so not-happy...? Mom should be happy... And there's Alin, he doesn't look so happy either."
"Rei, there's a group at the door." Older-Zelgadis growled. "Stop fantasizing about relationships you can never have and do as you're told." He shoved her out.
A gang of rowdy bandits stormed past the queue, and went straight to the bar.
"Food! Food! Service! Now!" They all chanted. She ran behind the bar.
"I'm sorry, we're shorthanded tonight!" She cried frightenedly. "Please, what do you want?"
"Well, well..." The leader smirked nastily. "First of all, I want you!" He grabbed her hand.
"Todd, I don't think that's a whore." One of the lesser bandits stated.
"She looks enough like one for me." He grabbed her face, trying to force a kiss to her lips. She pushed him off before his lips could meet hers, and quickly ran to the Slayers' table.
"Are you ok?" Gourry asked, patting her hand gently.
"F-fine." Rei stuttered. "I'm rather new on the job, not accustomed to it... but... erm... may I take your orders?"
"Can I order your name?" Alin asked quickly. Everyone stared at him. "Erm... I mean... what's your name?"
"Uhm... ah..." Rei blinked.
"HEY! YOU!" The bandit's leader called. He stormed up to the group. Lina scowled, pushing Rei a little behind Filia.
"Leave the kid alone. She's no whore."
"It's okay, kid-" Filia whispered to Rei.
"You hand her over, or this is gonna get bloody!" The bandit growled.
"We won't let you get hurt-"
"You want blood? How about flames? How about unimaginable pain?!" Lina stood up, her short fuse nearing its end.
"After all-"
"Bring it on, girly!" The bandit taunted.
"Lina is an expert in bandit massacre!" Filia finished.
"Go Lina!" Rei cried eagerly.
"That's right!" Lina winked at Rei. With a simple swipe of her sword, the bandit leader's head was laying on Kinsei's appetizer plate- to Kinsei's horror and Elijah's fascination.
"Awesome!" Elijah picked up the head, and made it sing a little song for the other bandits, who were staring in disbelief. "I'm a stupid bandit, assaulting waitresses and stealing all you've got! Lina Inverse is the greatest bandit killer, she'll put you in your graves to rot!" This enraged the bandits, causing them to leap at the table. "Oh, shit." Zelgadis pushed Kinsei, Elijah, and Alin under the table, and Filia swiped them all back with her mace.
"Take these." Zel whispered, giving Elijah and Kinsei daggers and Alin a beaten sword. "Defend yourself, that alone."
"Hikari O!" Gourry cried, making the Sword of Light appear from his sword's hilt. Rei gasped in wonder, still hidden behind Filia.
"Hey, can I see that?" She gasped, tapping his arm.
"Oh, sure!" He smiled cheerfully, putting the Sword of Light into her hand. Around them, Zelgadis was holding off two bandits, Filia was bashing at three, and Amelia was mumbling white magic, holding another four outside the battle. Lina slashed the arms off a bandit, and thwapped Gourry
"Gourry, you MORON!" Rei swung the sword a little. She noticed Older Zelgadis staring directly at her in anger. She smirked nastily, feeling strange liberation.
"Alin!" She called out, still staring at Zelgadis. "I'll tell you my name!"
"DON'T YOU-"
"It's me, Alin! Rei!" Alin jumped out from under the table, grabbing her hand.
"DAMN YOU!" Zelgadis roared.
"Here is what I have learned!" Rei cried, slashing out in the way she'd been taught, quickly disabling, dismembering, and disarming each bandit. They glared at her. Lina, Gourry, and Older Zelgadis stared in shock.
"I've taught you too well, girl!" Zelgadis growled angrily. Lina and Filia finished off the bandits. Rei turned to Alin, and clutched both of his hands.
"Alin, get me away from him..." Lina and Filia put up their weapons, blocking Older Zelgadis' advance to Rei.
"Give me that girl." He growled, pushing Lina out of the way.
"Rei, I- " He shivered. "I can't lose you." He pressed his lips against hers, encompassing her within their first kiss. As she pulled back from him, Zel grabbed her.
"END YOUR FOOLISHNESS!" He screamed, shoving Alin into a wall. He pressed in on Rei's temples, instantly knocking her out.
"Unhand her!" Alin cried, trying to push Zelgadis off. Lina, Gourry, Amelia, Filia, Zel, Kinsei, and Elijah watched as Alin tried to shove Zelgadis back. Zelgadis shoved Alin back.
"Touch me, and the girl dies." He whispered angrily, stomping away. Alin shuddered, and fell to his knees, crying.
"Rei... Rei..."
"Amelia, go release the other employees. Undoubtedly, they're tied up in the back." Zel instructed her. She nodded. "Filia, reset the tables." Filia began to set the tables right.
"Why would he train that girl to swordfight? And how could she do that in the space of two weeks?" Lina wondered quietly.
"She was swinging rather wildly, most of her hits were pure luck." Zel responded quietly. "Alin, stop crying and get up."
"That... that was my girlfriend... he's going to kill her... that Zelgadis is going to kill her!" He sobbed. Kinsei and Elijah gasped. The Slayers all turned around.
"That man's name... was Zelgadis?" Zel whispered in disbelief.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Nayru: (cough) ... I should probably continue this now.
Chapter 4: C'est Moi Seul Baise
Rei jitterishly held herself straight. She was trying to remain calm. Her hair had been tied into a high bun, and she was dressed in a skimpy waitress' outfit. The bar she was in was scruffy-looking, the type of place ruffians and bandits would dine. The food was cheap and bad, and the place was dirty. It wasn't the type of place she'd imagined her mother-figure dining. Older-Zelgadis was watching her every move from the back of the restaurant they had "borrowed". He was holding the workers hostage.
"They will be here in a minute." Zelgadis murmured. Rei nodded. "You will serve them, and I will see to it that Gourry and Lina's relationship starts to unravel."
"Why are you making me do this...?" Rei whispered weakly.
"So you can watch your own undoing." He replied nonchalantly. At that second, the Slayers gang entered- with three people Rei knew very well.
"This is not the type of place I'd see anyone related to Rei eating." Alin confided to Elijah.
"Rei with perfect manners and fine tastes? I couldn't see her eating anywhere I've seen here!"
"What are you two chattering about?" Zel grumbled brashly.
"Nothing!" They both squeaked.
"This is my favorite restaurant in town! I'm glad it's still open." Lina sighed wearily.
Kinsei rolled her eyes. "I'm just glad we're going to sit for a meal. I'm starving."
"You're not starving until you're keeled over with hunger." Filia snorted rather coldly.
"Are we just going to hang in the doorway?" Amelia whined.
"No." Zel opened the door for Amelia. The group entered in a mass. A short female with red hair was standing at the hostess' podium, staring into space. She had the nervous look of a fawn surrounded by hunters with lights shining into her eyes. Alin stepped to the front of the group, right next to Lina.
"Hey kid, can we get a greeting or something?" The hostess continued to stare into space, her eyes drifting across the gathered.
"Excuse me, miss." Alin calmly pressed a hand under her ear. She looked directly at him, snapping out of his.
"J'liketableboothhowmanyinparty-"
"Please, miss, space bar and punctuations." Alin interrupted politely. He realized the odd stare he was recieving from Lina and the others. "Erm, I mean-"
"Sorry. I meant, how many in your party and would like like a table or a booth?"
"There are- one two three... Xel and Chocolate disappeared again, great- eight of us, right?" She turned to Alin.
"You five, us three." He nodded.
"Eight. We'd like a table, preferably in a corner." The girl nodded.
"This way please." She led them to a table set for ten in a corner, and gave them each menus. As soon as she vanished into the back room, Kinsei and Elijah burst out laughing, and Alin blushed furiously, his skin going from blue to purple.
"You did the Rei thing with that waitress!" Kinsei laughed.
"She looks a lot like Rei, and I figured that everyone has that behind-the-ear pressure point..."
"Rei, his girlfriend?" Amelia asked, blinking.
"How forgetful are you, Amelia? Rei's who we're looking for!" Filia exclaimed.
"Oh yeah. You say the waitress looks like her?" Amelia frowned in thought.
"Spitting image, I swear it!" Alin nodded vigorously.
"I dunno. Rei wouldn't ever dress like that."
"And what a dress it was! Even for such a small-built girl, wow!" Gourry shouted. "I could see her pretty blue panties." He smiled cheerfully. Lina thwapped him.
"Calm yourself, Rei..." Rei whispered to herself. "You must remain calm... this is just your first time ever seeing your birth parents... which ones did he say were mine?!" Rei peered out at the Slayers again. "Lina... and... the blonde one... Gourry... wow, he looks so happy! And Lina... my mom... why is she so not-happy...? Mom should be happy... And there's Alin, he doesn't look so happy either."
"Rei, there's a group at the door." Older-Zelgadis growled. "Stop fantasizing about relationships you can never have and do as you're told." He shoved her out.
A gang of rowdy bandits stormed past the queue, and went straight to the bar.
"Food! Food! Service! Now!" They all chanted. She ran behind the bar.
"I'm sorry, we're shorthanded tonight!" She cried frightenedly. "Please, what do you want?"
"Well, well..." The leader smirked nastily. "First of all, I want you!" He grabbed her hand.
"Todd, I don't think that's a whore." One of the lesser bandits stated.
"She looks enough like one for me." He grabbed her face, trying to force a kiss to her lips. She pushed him off before his lips could meet hers, and quickly ran to the Slayers' table.
"Are you ok?" Gourry asked, patting her hand gently.
"F-fine." Rei stuttered. "I'm rather new on the job, not accustomed to it... but... erm... may I take your orders?"
"Can I order your name?" Alin asked quickly. Everyone stared at him. "Erm... I mean... what's your name?"
"Uhm... ah..." Rei blinked.
"HEY! YOU!" The bandit's leader called. He stormed up to the group. Lina scowled, pushing Rei a little behind Filia.
"Leave the kid alone. She's no whore."
"It's okay, kid-" Filia whispered to Rei.
"You hand her over, or this is gonna get bloody!" The bandit growled.
"We won't let you get hurt-"
"You want blood? How about flames? How about unimaginable pain?!" Lina stood up, her short fuse nearing its end.
"After all-"
"Bring it on, girly!" The bandit taunted.
"Lina is an expert in bandit massacre!" Filia finished.
"Go Lina!" Rei cried eagerly.
"That's right!" Lina winked at Rei. With a simple swipe of her sword, the bandit leader's head was laying on Kinsei's appetizer plate- to Kinsei's horror and Elijah's fascination.
"Awesome!" Elijah picked up the head, and made it sing a little song for the other bandits, who were staring in disbelief. "I'm a stupid bandit, assaulting waitresses and stealing all you've got! Lina Inverse is the greatest bandit killer, she'll put you in your graves to rot!" This enraged the bandits, causing them to leap at the table. "Oh, shit." Zelgadis pushed Kinsei, Elijah, and Alin under the table, and Filia swiped them all back with her mace.
"Take these." Zel whispered, giving Elijah and Kinsei daggers and Alin a beaten sword. "Defend yourself, that alone."
"Hikari O!" Gourry cried, making the Sword of Light appear from his sword's hilt. Rei gasped in wonder, still hidden behind Filia.
"Hey, can I see that?" She gasped, tapping his arm.
"Oh, sure!" He smiled cheerfully, putting the Sword of Light into her hand. Around them, Zelgadis was holding off two bandits, Filia was bashing at three, and Amelia was mumbling white magic, holding another four outside the battle. Lina slashed the arms off a bandit, and thwapped Gourry
"Gourry, you MORON!" Rei swung the sword a little. She noticed Older Zelgadis staring directly at her in anger. She smirked nastily, feeling strange liberation.
"Alin!" She called out, still staring at Zelgadis. "I'll tell you my name!"
"DON'T YOU-"
"It's me, Alin! Rei!" Alin jumped out from under the table, grabbing her hand.
"DAMN YOU!" Zelgadis roared.
"Here is what I have learned!" Rei cried, slashing out in the way she'd been taught, quickly disabling, dismembering, and disarming each bandit. They glared at her. Lina, Gourry, and Older Zelgadis stared in shock.
"I've taught you too well, girl!" Zelgadis growled angrily. Lina and Filia finished off the bandits. Rei turned to Alin, and clutched both of his hands.
"Alin, get me away from him..." Lina and Filia put up their weapons, blocking Older Zelgadis' advance to Rei.
"Give me that girl." He growled, pushing Lina out of the way.
"Rei, I- " He shivered. "I can't lose you." He pressed his lips against hers, encompassing her within their first kiss. As she pulled back from him, Zel grabbed her.
"END YOUR FOOLISHNESS!" He screamed, shoving Alin into a wall. He pressed in on Rei's temples, instantly knocking her out.
"Unhand her!" Alin cried, trying to push Zelgadis off. Lina, Gourry, Amelia, Filia, Zel, Kinsei, and Elijah watched as Alin tried to shove Zelgadis back. Zelgadis shoved Alin back.
"Touch me, and the girl dies." He whispered angrily, stomping away. Alin shuddered, and fell to his knees, crying.
"Rei... Rei..."
"Amelia, go release the other employees. Undoubtedly, they're tied up in the back." Zel instructed her. She nodded. "Filia, reset the tables." Filia began to set the tables right.
"Why would he train that girl to swordfight? And how could she do that in the space of two weeks?" Lina wondered quietly.
"She was swinging rather wildly, most of her hits were pure luck." Zel responded quietly. "Alin, stop crying and get up."
"That... that was my girlfriend... he's going to kill her... that Zelgadis is going to kill her!" He sobbed. Kinsei and Elijah gasped. The Slayers all turned around.
"That man's name... was Zelgadis?" Zel whispered in disbelief.
TO BE CONTINUED...
