BITE ME

Part three

GSR implied.

G, a little fantasy…

Post "Nesting Dolls": Grissom's pet notices how much he has changed in one week.


He doesn't look at me anymore. Not the way he used to.

Oh, he feeds me and he pats my head now and then, but it's not the same.

He's busy, I know. He's been pulling double shifts and trying to make up for Sara Sidle 's absence; he also has to supervise Greg Sanders, and -even though she doesn't need supervision- he also keeps an eye on Sophia what's-her-name. He doesn't trust her.

Good for him. I don't trust her either. But then I don't trust anyone.

But I digress. As I was saying, he hasn't looked at me in despair like he used to.

I should be happy, right? I mean, he's my favorite human and if he's happy I should be happy too…

But I'm not. I'm afraid he-

There, I've said it: I'm afraid that one of these days he'll decide he doesn't need me anymore.

When did things begin to change? Well, I think it was last Thursday, when Greg entered his office and started asking questions…

(flashback:)

"So?" The young man asked, "What happened? What did Eckley say? Did he insist that you fire Sara?"

"Relax, Greg." Grissom said calmly, "Sara's job is safe." He sat behind his desk and took a deep breath. "For now."

"Thank God!" Greg sighed noisily, flopping down on a chair, "For a while I thought we were going to lose her!"

"We will if she's not careful, Greg," Grissom said, unable to share Greg's enthusiasm.

Greg hesitated.

"I still don't understand what happened, Grissom. I mean, we all know how Sara is; she just speaks her mind." He shrugged, "I guess not everyone can take it."

"Things have changed, Greg." Grissom said quietly, "We all need to accept that. Sara will need our support when she comes back."

"You can count on me, boss." Greg said reassuringly and Grissom smiled.

Greg's optimism is so contagious.

Grissom looked at the reports on his desk.

"We'll have to cover up for Sara for a full week, Greg-"

"I know." Greg interrupted, sitting up straighter in his seat. "What do you want me to do?"

"Well, since Sophia likes to work alone, you and me we'll be teaming up on most of the cases."

"Ok" Greg said, as if he were mentally taking notes.

"That means pulling double shifts-"

"Ok" he nodded, "I'll bring a pound of blue Hawaiian to help us along."

"There'll be no nights off, Greg. Sorry."

"That's ok." He nodded again, "Anything else?"

Grissom smiled.

"Yes." He nodded solemnly, "Go home and take a nap. You're still off-shift."

"A nap." Greg repeated, "Right away, boss." Greg went to the door, but before he reached it he turned, "Hey, Grissom?" he said, "Thanks. You know, for standing up for Sara." He smiled, "It just wouldn't be the same without her."

"No." Grissom agreed.

After Greg left, Grissom took a deep breath and leant back in his seat. He closed his eyes for a moment.

I was waiting for him to open his eyes and look in my direction, when someone knocked on the door.

Catherine Willows.

"May I come in?" she asked.

Grissom opened his eyes.

"Sure."

She approached his desk but didn't take a seat.

"Gil, I'll go straight to the point-"

"As always."

She didn't acknowledge the interruption.

"I'm new in this game," she started, "But I think I can give you some advice: Don't make this harder than it has to be. You don't want Eckley as your enemy."

"I don't want him as an enemy, Catherine," he said patiently, "But I don't want him as a friend, either." He looked at her and added, "And neither should you."

She narrowed her eyes.

"Are you trying to make feel bad for knowing how to play the game, Gil?" She challenged.

Grissom stared silently at her.

Catherine leant on his desk.

"I'm not apologizing for what happened. Sara made a mistake." She said, "She deserved the suspension."

"I agree." He said calmly. "I just don't believe she deserved to be fired."

"You don't?" she repeated incredulously, "She was disrespectful to Eckley; she-"

"Eckley?" he asked, truly amazed, "You're fighting Eckley's battles now? I thought you were pissed off because she was disrespectful to you!"

"Oh, I am." She retorted. "And you might be angry at Eckley but he's right about Sara; she can't be trusted to work certain cases, she's-"

"I trust her," he said curtly.

Catherine shook her head.

"Gil, do you now what the problem here is? You're letting your feelings affect your judgment." She paused, "You're making it personal."

"Am I?" He asked, wide eyed, "Well, then you should be glad; you used to accuse me of not doing that often enough."

She stared at him and then she shook her head, as if she were giving up. She turned to leave.

"Catherine?" he called out and paused until she turned, "A word of advice: If you ever need to ask Warrick or Nick what their problem is, make sure you take them into your office first. That way, they can be honest and you can save face." He paused, "It's what I always do."

He doesn't say it but it's implied, I think: He's done it for her. He's let her rage, he's let her criticize him –sometimes fairly, sometimes not so fairly- he's covered up for her… he's let her get away with mistakes that Eckley wouldn't have forgiven-

I guess he expected her to be more forgiving towards Sara.

"You should learn to choose your battles, Gil," she said softly, "You should think of yourself -" She said.

"I have thought of myself, Catherine." He said softly, "Actually, it's all I've done lately. I've been obsessed with how Eckley's actions have affected me, instead of thinking of how they affected others –you, included. Not anymore. There are people who depend on me, and I'll do anything to protect them. I'm lucky to have them." He smiled, "I won't let my own indifference affect my colleagues' lives anymore. I've learned a hard lesson."

She stared at him as if she didn't recognize him… and then she left.

(Ends flashback)

So, that's what happened a few days ago. Since then he's been busy, he's hardly had more than a few hours of sleep every day…

And yet he's content.

Maybe it's because of the calls he gets now and then. When he takes those calls, whatever he hears must be special because his face just changes- his expression softens, his smile turns gentle, and his voice sounds different – throaty and seductive- even when all he says is 'Sara, hi.'

I can't help wondering if Grissom will need me now. Don't get me wrong. I don't want him to be so desperate that he asks me to bite him; it's just… He used to turn to me for comfort and now he doesn't. I don't have his attention anymore.

I'm huddling in a corner of my crystal home, staring at the wall and feeling sorry for myself-

When suddenly a plump cricket falls just an inch away from me.

Ooooh, my favorite treat!

Wait a minute… It's not my birthday! What-

I look around.

He's there, smiling warmly.

"Hey, my friend." He says, "Enjoy."

Aw, you… you wonderful human-

I love you.

The end.