Author's Note: You didn't really think I'd have Severus do that bad thing, did you? Shame on you, and shame on me for making you think it! No worries, it was all an illusion-I know having it be a dream is pretty cliché, but trust me-it will lead to into uncharted territory between our two characters before the story is over!
XOXOXOXOXOX
Hermione shot out of bed and right into Severus. "Get off of me! Get off!" she yelled, struggling against him.
"What on earth's gotten into you?" he asked, holding onto her shoulders to keep her from running out the room.
Hermione stopped struggling and regained her senses. She was in her room, Severus was with her, and it was storming outside.
The parallels to her nightmare and the reality of that moment were not comforting. What if it wasn't just a dream, but a premonition?!
Hermione stopped struggling. Severus's grip was still firm on her arms. "Let go of me." She demanded.
"Not until you tell me what you were screaming about." He said in an equally stubborn tone.
"I had a dream." She said flatly.
Severus frowned. "So did Martin Luther King, but I doubt Civil Rights would have had you screaming."
"All right, it was a bad dream-a nightmare. Now please, let me go."
Severus frowned slightly and let go of her shoulders, though he did not move from his place before her. "I may have something that could help, there are calming potions relating to specific dreams. What was yours?"
Hermione hated him so much at that moment she could scream. How dare he stand there and offer calming potions after being so dismissive of her in the last few days?!
"I dreamt you were raping me." She said acidly, hoping to sting him with her venomous words.
Silence stretched for a long time. Severus's eyes had widened and he'd taken a half-step back from her. Hermione stood there before him, suddenly sorry for her cruel action, unsure of what he would do.
Would he start screaming at her?
Would he hit her?
Try to enact the dream?
Hermione felt very vulnerable then. Her wand was on the dresser; Severus stood between her and her only defense. He was bigger, stronger, faster and infinitely more formidable with magic than her. She knew that Severus was even strong enough to perform wand-less magic, he would only have to gesture at her to inflict some sort of punishment.
He was a powerful full-grown wizard, specializing in Dark magic, and at the moment she was just a girl in her PJ's.
Without a word, Severus turned and left.
XOXOXOXOXOXOX
The next morning, Petra informed her that Severus had left the estate entirely.
"What do you mean, he left? Where did he go?"
"Master said he had to get away for a bit, miss. He did not say when he would be back, but I'm sure it won't be long."
Hermione felt dazed. "Okay, thank you Petra."
"Yes, miss. May I get you breakfast?"
"Hmm? Oh, no thank you."
Petra went back downstairs, leaving Hermione in her room. She felt sick to her stomach.
'What the Hell is wrong with me?! I had a bad dream and decide to lash out at him like that when he's been nothing but generous to me?! Oh, God, what have I done?'
They had established a delicate balance in their farce of a marriage, had she just destroyed everything?
Hermione was angry with herself for acting so foolish, but then again, Snape had been acting strange for the last two days as well-she'd been angry with him before he came to her last night, that's why she'd lashed out at him.
Hermione berated herself for an hour more before the idea came to her to check the journal for a clue as to why he'd been acting so strange the last few days. It was sneaky, and more befitting to a Slytherin or Ravenclaw than to a Gryffindor…but reading his journal gave her a valuable edge with him-this was the only way she could learn more of him and the treachery of it seemed to pale in comparison to what happened the night before, so why not?
"He already hates me, it can't do anymore harm." She said to herself.
Hermione put on a favorite Muggle outfit of a black t-shirt and a pair of jeans-more comfortable and easier to move around in than wizard robes-before padding down the long corridor to the Master bedroom.
Carefully, she slipped in, trying to be stealthy as a cat-she'd learned plenty by watching Crookshanks over the years. The Master bedroom was as she expected it to be-dark wood floors, a king sized four-poster bed, high ceilings-very similar to the bedroom of Severus's quarters at Hogwarts, only larger. Beautiful, Gothic and ornate.
She checked the drawers of his bureau and under the bed; the journal wasn't hidden in the closet or under the pillows. Hermione was about to give up-no guarantee that he'd taken it with him when they left Hogwarts, after all-when an idea came to her.
Pulling the wand from her waistband, Hermione called out, "Accio journal!"
Instantly, Severus's journal flew into Hermione's waiting hands from behind a hanging painting on the wall. 'Wow, I wonder if he knows I've been reading it and that's why he hid it back there?' she thought
Hermione shrugged. If Severus had been so worried about her reading his journal, then why hadn't he put a spell on either it or the bedroom door so that she couldn't get to it?
She turned past the pages she had read previously and came to an entry set about two weeks after they had gotten married:
'This is an odd situation, but certainly an agreeable one. Hermione and I have been married for two and a half weeks, and so far everything is going well. We do not see each other often, and when we do it's very polite and civil. Aside from a tense moment on the 'wedding night' in which I think she assumed I was going bed her (horrid thought!)…
Hermione frowned, remembering that night. What did he mean by that-"horrid thought"? She may not be the prettiest of girls, but was she really that unappealing to him?
She shook her head and continued reading.
'I've allowed Hermione to sleep in my bedroom-as an insomniac I have little use for it-and I thought this was harmless until Minerva stopped by. She'd dropped by early in the morning, the day after the wedding ceremony, needing some rune stones and asked where Hermione was. I'd replied that the girl was still sleeping and a look came over Minerva as if she'd sucked on a lemon. She swatted me on the head with a rolled copy of The Daily Prophet…needless to say, the entire staff thinks I'm a lecherous pervert, but that's a step up from Death Eater, isn't it?'
Hermione bit her lip. The image of Professor McGonagall swatting Severus with a newspaper was funny, but at the same time she knew she shouldn't laugh-Severus was given a harder time about being married than she had.
Hermione hadn't been hit with anything more than teasing remarks from her friends.
She turned more pages, going past sketches of various animals and half-finished potion recipes before finding what she wanted.
'I asked Hermione if she would come to the family estate for the Yule holiday-as I had done for years. She was reluctant to come because she missed her parents. I crafted portkeys for them and sent the keys to London so that they may join us two days after we had settled in. I had thought this would be a good opportunity to get acquainted with my in-laws…how wrong I was! I knew from the second they looked at me that this wasn't going to go well. Dinner proved me correct, as I knew it would. No sooner than the meal was over did Hermione's father accuse me of the worst, her mother agreeing wholeheartedly.
'I'm a monster, a sneak, a bastard-just a select few of the terms bestowed upon me by Mommy and Daddy dearest. I had thought that I could escape the evening with their blows to my self-esteem (such as it is) but I was wrong again. Hermione's father gave me a black eye. Was I hoping for too much to think that was the worst? Yes! Hermione's parents think the absolute worst of me, and so does she. I heard it myself, Hermione promised to run all the way home if I were ever to 'force my attentions' on her. Like I ever would, even in my time as a Death Eater I hadn't sunk so low!'
Hermione didn't know he'd heard them, she thought he'd been in his room at the time, not in the library. Oh God! That's why he'd been so cold, and after what she said last night…she had to talk to him as soon as he came back…if he came back.
