Disclaimer: I still don't own a thing.
FI think I forgot to mention this in chapter one…For those of you who really like Tidus, Seymour, or Wakka, you might not want to read this, because I bash them a lot-especially Tidus and Seymour because they are pansies..and my friends and I have always bashed them, so it's kind of a habbit. Sorry.
Anne: -Turns to camera- Eight of our heroes remain. Who will be the knight in shining armor to save themselves from the walk of shame? Round two will start when we return to..The Weakest Link!
Commercial Break
All contestants except Auron grab a cup of water from behind their booth-
Auron: -Glances around, then looks to Anne.- Hey where's the booze?
Anne: Sir Auron, this is a game show, not a bar. We just provide water to quench your thirst. I suggest you drink it.
Auron: You've got millions of dollars and you can't even provide us with a beer? Hmph..cheapskates
Anne: We wouldn't want you drunk for the show.. Besides, if you win, you can buy all the 'booze' you want. If you lose, as we say…you leave with nothing.
Seymour: N-nothing? So if we loose…you take our clothes too?
Lulu: -Rolls eyes- Seymour, we all know it's your secret fantasy for Anne to remove your clothes, but no, idiot. She means the losers don't get any money.
Seymour: Oh….darn.
Tidus: Wh-what? She'll take our money! Quick, hide the gil pouch! Some game-show this is..how dare they steal from people!
Jecht: Why…why did I have to have a stupid son…
Lulu: I was wondering the same thing.
Anne: -Smirks- He follows in his father's footsteps
Jecht: Excuse me! Why I oughta-
Anne: You oughta what, Mr. old nothing but a has-been blitzball player?
Jecht: I can still play! I'll show y-
Auron: Let it go, Jecht…she can kick you off the show, ya know. Besides, I have something that will cheer you up. I forgot I had refilled this.. –Unhooks tokkuri from belt and drinks from it-
Jecht: Alright, whiskey! Let me have some, man!
Anne: Just what we need…drunken contestants…
Tidus: -Walks over to talk to Jecht-
Auron: Catch. –Recaps tokkuri and throws it to Jecht- Heads up, Tidus.
Tidus: Do whaturns and sees tokkuri hurtling towards him- Aaaaahhh –Stands there like an idiot and gets conked in the head with tokkuri- Eheeeeeee…whee… -Faints-
Auron: Oops…
Jecht: -Picks up tokkuri- Ah, I don't mind. He's annoying anyway. -Drinks-
Kimahri: -Drags Tidus back to his rightful spot on the platform and lays him there-
Rikku: -Prances over to Auron and pulls on his coat- Hey grumpy! I mean..Sir Auron..
Auron: What do you want?
Rikku: Can I have a drink?
Auron/Anne: NO!
Rikku: B-but why..? –Starts to tear up-
Auron: You're too young..and don't give me that face.
Lulu: Rikku…do you want me to put you in a time out chair?
Rikku: No -Crosses arms and pouts-
Auron: Go bother someone else, brat.
Rikku: Ok! -Walks around, then goes up to Seymour- I'm bored..
Seymour: How is that my problem?
Rikku: Ooo I know what would be fun! Can I braid your hair all pretty and do your makeup and-
Seymour: Excuse me but do I look like a girl to you!
Rikku: Well…….yeah.
Seymour: WHY YOU LITTLE PIPSQUEAK! -Goes to attack-
Lulu: -Grabs Rikku's arm and pulls her away- I told you to behave yourself little girl.
Rikku: -Pouts- It's Auron's fault. He told me to go bother someone else!
Lulu: -Glares at Auron-
Auron: I…wanted to get her away from me.
Seymour: -Smirks- Uh-oh…someone's in trouble with his potential woman.
Anne: I suggest you settle your disputes and save them for voting off the weakest link…we're about to start round two. –blinks- Wait a minute…we're missing a contestant!
Yuna: Tidus.. He is here. He is just… -Looks down to floor- Unconscious…
Seymour: Now what? We can't go on without him.
Wakka: -Comes out from backstage- I'll take his place, ya?
Anne: No. -Shoves him backstage again-
Wakka: Oh ya baby! Come join me backstage later you hot mama!
All contestants: -Laugh-
Anne: -Glares-
All contestants: -Shut up-
Anne: You all will just have to do your best without him. We're going back on the air.
Seymour: But-..
Lulu: What's the matter Seymour? Can't go on without your boyfriend?
Seymour: -Is about to protest when Anne speaks up-
Anne: Welcome back to round two of the Weakest Link. Ten seconds will be taken off the clock, and we'll start with the strongest link from last round, Sir Auron. Let's play…the Weakest Link! Start the clock. -Turns to Auron- What ability is needed on the weapon 'Excalibur' to give it its name?
Auron: Break Damage Limit
Anne: Correct! Lulu, what sphere do you get when you defeat an Earth Eater in the Monster Arena?
Lulu: Fortune sphere.
Anne: Correct. Jecht, which Al Bhed Primer do you find in the Sunken Cave?
Jecht: Er..uh.. –Stumped- How the hell should I know? Volume…ten?
Anne: Not even close. Vol. XXV. Kitty-Kat…How does the overdrive mode 'Comrade' function?
Kimahri: -Growls- Charges when allies take damage..
Anne: Correct. Rikku,
Rikku: Bank baby!
Anne: How many hit points does Seymour Omnis have?
Rikku: Hmm…ten?
Seymour: Very funny…
Anne: No, 80,000. Yuna, the Jumbo Flan is immune to Anima's 'Pain' attack damage. True or False?
Yuna: I believe that is false.
Anne: I believe you are correct. Tidus….What is the name of the song that plays in the Moonflow scene and during the credits after the game?
Tidus: ……………… -Is silent-
Yuna: -Under her breath- Oh he'd better know this one or else..Tidus? –Looks down-
Rikku: Crap, he's still knocked out!
Tidus: …………..
Anne: -Looks at clock-
Jecht: -Curses under his breath- He's running our time out!
Yuna: -Kicks Tidus- C'mon..wake up!
Auron: Smirks Forgive me for this, Yuna… -Yells over to Tidus- Hey Tidus….Yuna is stripping naked for you..
Everyone: -Gasps-
Tidus: -Immediately jumps up- Huh who what! –Sees Yuna fully clothed- Aw darn…why'd you wake me up?
Yuna: -Slaps Tidus, then walks over and slaps Auron- I can't believe you did that Sir Auron!
Auron: -Winces- Sorry..
Yuna: … -Hugs- It's ok. -Goes back to her spot-
Tidus: Hug for me?
Yuna: NO! NOW ANSWER THE DANG QUESTION! –Gives him death glare-
Everyone is stunned to see Yuna act this way-
Jecht: Heh heh..now look who's in trouble..
Tidus: -Flushes pale and gulps- Uh c-could you..er…repeat the question?
Anne: -Decides to have pity on him and repeats the question-
Tidus: Oh uh…
Yuna: -Looks like she's about to kill him-
Tidus: -Sweatdrops- Suteki Da Ne!
Anne: Finally…correct. Seymour, how much MP does the ability 'Osmose' cost to use?
Seymour: Zero.
Lulu: The amount of brain cells he has..
Anne: Correct! Both of you… Sir Auron, How many hit points does Geosgaeno have?
Auron: -Arches eyebrow as he thinks- Hell…I don't remember..40,000?
Anne: Wrong, 32,767
Auron: Dang. I was close..
Tidus: It's that old age that makes you so forgetful!
Auron: Watch it punk, or you won't make it until your next birthday party!
Tidus: Wahhh dad he threatened me!
Jecht: So? If he kills you, I'll help.
Tidus: Meanies! You're a bunch of mean old farts!
Auron: Haven't you wasted enough of our time already this round!
Anne: Agreed. Lulu, Name the ship your party sailed from Kilika to Luca on.
Lulu: S. S. Winno.
Anne: Correct! ..Mr. Wanna-be father who can't raise his kid right..
Jecht: Hey!
Anne: What doesbuzzer sounds- ..Time is up, I cannot complete the question, and it's all Tidus' fault.
Tidus: Hey now..let's not place blame..
Auron: I think we should.
Tidus: Well in that case, it's your fault! You're the one who threw that bottle thingy in the first place!
Auron: You were the one stupid enough to get in the way of a flying projectile.
Anne: Let's..get..voting please..
Contestants: -Vote-
Narrator: This round, statistically Tidus was the weakest link because he wasted so much freaking time. I mean really, what a loser.. That guy-…er…I mean aherm, and Lulu was the strongest link of this round. Let's see if the voting echoes the statistics..
Anne: Alright, voting is over. Whose brain was used as the official blitzball of yesterday's tournament games? Who will be next to take the walk of shame and have to suffer the company of Wakka?
Wakka: -Yells from backstage- Hey I heard that! You know you want to be next to take the walk of fame..er..shame…, Anne! Wooo ya!
Anne: -Ignores the moron yelling from backstage- We will find out when we return to..the Weakest Link!
Commercial Break—
Bleh, sorry this chapter wasn't as long as the last one, and it took awhile for me to get it put up..I don't like it as much as chapter one either. Just so ya know, I'll probably be rather slow in updating this for the next little while. It's getting down to crunch time in the last six weeks of the semester at college. Anyway…yeah, please review and let me know what you think, and also if you have any suggestions. You can also let me know who you think should be voted off next. Thanks!
