Nobby Dumbarse had been reluctant to let Larry go. This would mean he would need to take on the task of attending to Mrs Pigg. He would need to let doodle down from the attic. They had lost a lot of money on the hospital treatment for Doodle and if anyone got wind of Doodles treatment the Dumbarses would be taken to court and possibly sentenced to years in prison. Nobby's hand couldn't fit through the attic window to give him his food, Not that he would be even be able to reach it. One step onto the roof would lead to nothing but a broken roof and lots of medical bill. However Nobby had been trying to persuade Chow Phat to take Doodle onto the roof. Seeming that his wife was now the fifth time winner of the England's fattest dumpiest women award it would be killing two birds with one stone. (Mr Dumbarse hated his wife. Her eating habits cost money that could be better spent on more food for him.)
Mr Dumbarse couldn't assign Doodle to "Aid" Mrs Pigg for if he did then Mrs Pigg would sue him for "Loss of her Anatomy" AND he would lose his best customer.
In the end Mr Dumbarse let Larry "TWTG" Rotter go to Warty Hogs school of Bastards and Bigotry.
In the next few days all that happened way Larry left with Haggot The Faggot to Ding-dong alley, home of criminals, gypsies, gangsters and other assorted scum. Larry met Terd the keeper of the Leaking Bladder pub. He went to Olives and Us and bought his magical warty olive. He also was bought an owl called Crack Head who liked to smoke strange smelling cigars....
Larry also met Drinking Madly AKA Blond Airhead Conceited Twat With Dodgy Hairstyle (B.A.C.T.W.D.H) in Mad Max's massage parlour.
XOXOXOX
A/n: Im bored im skipping to Kings Cross
XOXOXOX
Larry was left at the cross king station with no idea where to go and instructions to find platform 9. 555535145214367423523675468. Suddenly from out of the sewers there came a group of 'people'. They were dressed in bin liners and had multi-coloured afro hair.
One of the freaks came up to Larry.
"Hello" said the little social outcast in a cockney accent "My names Random Runt With The Measles or RRWTM will you be my friend?"
Larry contemplated this
"Ummmmm.... No"
"Please"
"No"
"Please"
"No"
"Please"
"No"
"Please"
"for the last time NO you ungrateful little clown haired loser the day I become friend with you is the day my uncle Nobby goes on a diet"
Suddenly Nobby Dumbarse appeared wearing a tracksuit and trainers
"Hello Larry I've just com to tell you that im going on a diet bye"
With that he disappeared
"Damn that means im stuck with you"
"Yay"
"From now on you shall no longer be known as RRWTM. You shall be known as Runt Measles"
"Yay"
Suddenly they found themselves in a train.
The door slid open and a girl with privet hedge like hair jumped into the compartment.
"Hello TWTG and RRWTM AKA Larry Rotter and Runt Measles im your new best friend who does all the work for you my names Humping Grunger also known as Bushy Haired Know-it-all With Big Rabbit Teeth Like Doodle The Rabid Childs or BHKWBRTLDTRC for short"
"Cool" said Runt
"Anyways wtf is it with the abbreviations on names and all that crap?" asked Larry
"No idea"
Suddenly BHKWBRTLDTRC let out a scream of delight as her seat caught of frie
"Bwahhahahahahahahahaha burn! BURN!"
Suddenly the door slid open and Drinking Madly (AKA Blond Airhead Conceited Twat With Dodgy Hairstyle) stepped in with two apes following him
"Wheres the fire?" asked one ape?
"Hello Larry can we be friends you like me more then the tramp and the girl with the dodgy teeth and hair"
"Hey my hairs better than yours!"
"Is not"
"Is too"
"Is not"
"Is too"
"Is not"
"Is too"
"Is not"
"Is too"
"Is not"
"Is too"
"Is not"
"Is too"
"Is not"
"Is too"
"Is not"
"Is too"
"Is not"
"Is too"
"Takes one to know one"
"SHUT UP!" yelled everyone in the train
"Anywho meet my pet monkeys/ bodyguards Crap and Gurgle"
Suddenly they found themselves in a room full of warty pigs and troughs.
"Welcome to Warty Hogs" said Haggot
