Song for the
sorrowful…
Chapter 2-Alistia
By BJ-Blatzkowitz
Disclaimer: Okay, I don't own Last Exile, this is copyrighted by Studio Gonzo. This is also under copyright of Madman Entertainment. The characters are used with uttermost care and with permission. Other characters not in Last Exile is under copyright of me, if you want to use it, ask me and mention it on the disclaimer.
WARNING: This fanfic contains several spoilers from the series in general. So if you haven't watched the entire series, then stop reading now. Otherwise, continue on at your own risk. Also, this fanfic uses "Numb" by Linkin Park…
Alistia looked as Tatiana walked on, without even taking her advice. Alistia just sighed as she headed back into her cabin. Opening the door, she looked into the neat quarters of her own. A lone picture stood on her desk. Picking it up, she looked at the irony of the picture. 'It was so easy during that time. I wished that I noticed him earlier. But I didn't want Tatiana to know about that time.' Lying down on her bed, she dozed into a dreamless sleep.
Alis' voice
I'm tired of being what you want to be…
Feeling so faithless…
I remembered the first time I saw Tatiana. Hotheaded and stubborn, she had a quality that I couldn't put my finger on it. It started when I had my first lecture. I think it as 'Ships of the active sector'. I recently only got in with my noble parents supporting the move they made. I was tired of just hanging around the house, being a noble lady, as they want me to be.
There wasn't a single seat when I entered the lecture hall, except for one next to Tatiana. At first, she was arrogant and the only thing she wanted to focus on was the material being presented. She was an able student, even capable of going to the top. Ironically, we were in completely different worlds. Tatiana was more of the commanding position, always demanding of the best, arrogant and proud. I was more of the one that supported any decisions and ever considerate of others.
Lost under the surface…
I don't know what you are expecting of me…
I remembered how happy Tatiana looked as she ascended the stairs on graduation day. She had exceeded herself in all the classes and was given the top honour for it. A valour dictorium. It was a scholarship where the student continued their training but was acknowledge as a possible candidate to become a captain instantly. Without having to go through the ranks, it was a highly prized possession to receive. I joined in the others celebrate the newest graduates. Then it sturck me, was I going to lose my reflection of myself in her? I didn't want to know…all I wanted knew was that as long she is my best friend I would be fine.
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes…
Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow…
After the photo shoot with all of the graduating students, I found Tatiana inside the Grand Hall after the ceremony. Standing beside her eliminated any fear of the world and helped me become stronger. I looked at her and she told me that someday, she'd be like the captains whose history is shown by the tapestries hanging on the walls. I asked her if she was going to attend the Graduation Ball, which was held after the last days of term. Originally, I saw that in her eyes, she didn't. But she softened up and told me that she'll come along. I was really happy as we walked together to the stores. We tried on many dresses in order to prepare ourselves ready before the rest of the students got the same idea.
I've become so numb…
I can't feel you there…
Become so tired…
So much more aware…
At the ball, we had a grand time together. There were many uniforms and formal dresses as we danced the night away. Tatiana then rashly asked me if I was of age yet. At first, asking me that question didn't faze me as I casually replied I did. (Aut: I think Anatoray's coming of age might be 16 year old…which compared to our coming of age is about 18 ) But then I found out where that we heading. Many of the students were already at the bar when we arrived. Tatiana order what I thought was a Blitz cocktail. I ordered a Lemon Lime and Bitters, which wasn't that potent compared to a Blitz one. The first spike of alcohol was something I wasn't prepared for. Choking on my drink, I heard Tatiana laughed as she rubbed my back to sooth the burning taste. Smiling at her, I thanked her for it. But then she did the most unexpected thing. Taking my chin, she gave me a light kiss on my lips. I felt as if I was caught naked in the act. Tatiana's lips moved away as she fell forward. Catching her, I realised that she was pissed at the time.
Can't you see that
you're smothering me…
Holding too tightly …
Afraid to lose
control…
Cause everything that you thought I would be…
Has
fallen apart right in front of you…
I was rather shocked as an edict from the Emperor ordered us to travel to the Silvana. 'The Kill-them-all Silvana'? The ship that no ship can kill? I thought it was a one-way trip as it was rumoured that no one was able to get within 100 miles of the Silvana. But Tatiana thought it wasn't that hard as we prepped to got to the Silvana. But the Silvana had different ideas when we approached it. Gun turrets swivelled to meet us the horrendous sound of battle echoed through my ears. I thought Tatiana would back off and tell the Emperor that we failed. Thanks to her stubborn nature, she told me that we'll make it and after that, we landed on the rear deck.
At first, we were a little bit intimidated by crew, especially Alex Rowe himself. But time managed to heal that intimidation and we proved ourselves time after time again. Tatiana was then promoted to Captain of the Vanship squadrons on the ship. I was merely her navi as I stood looking with her. But then someone changed all that.
And I know…
I may end up failing
too…
But I know…
You were just like me with someone
disappointed in you…
Claus was probably the reason why I started to have the same doubts with Tatiana. He was so free when he landed on the Silvana, more like the fresh skies when he landed. I couldn't help but to think of him time after time when he landed onboard. At Walker's Dock, he was always looking out for me. Even with those guys, I felt that he was something special. More than just a kind person and even more than a friend. When I volunteered to be his navi, I felt that Tatiana wasn't free enough like Claus was. Even when he went down with Tatiana when we attacked the Urbanus, I felt a part of me ripped away. Seeing both of them okay was perhaps the best experience I had.
Alister opened her eyes and found something wet on her face. Wiping it away, she found that she was crying.
'Why am I crying for?' she mused. 'Is it for Claus or for Tatiana? I can't even decide who is worth more to me now…' And with that, she got up, closing the door to her sanctuary.
Author's notes: Whew. That took a long time to create, as I had to re-watch the entire series in order to get what was going with the relationship with Alister, Claus and Tatiana. Retelling Alister's story was a bit hard, as I had to assume that in order to know Tatiana from the Academy, she had to be at least a highborn or a noble. That graduation ceremony was taken from my ceremony two years ago. But then again, flame if it wasn't done to your tastes. Okay then, time to get Tatiana's, Sophia's and Al's thoughts on their respected loved ones…
