She ran out of the apartment as if the hounds of hell were nipping at her heels. The despair that threatened to devour her choked her heart in a deadly grip refusing to let go. She had hoped for a different ending only to be crushed once again. Why couldn't her heart understand that it wasn't meant to be? Why must she keep wishing for the impossible? However, having seen Glory happily ensconced in Darien's embrace had shattered any illusions that had prevailed in Serena's heart.
The tears streamed down her cheeks and the sobs felt as if they were being wrenched from the deepest part of her being. When she had finally stopped running she realized that she was standing in the park that had seen them grow from children into adults her heart pounding furiously with recollections from the past. It's amazing how many memories were wrapped around in one place.
This park had seen them cry, laugh, and above all love.
It had been their sanctuary the secret forest were they told each other their dreams their hopes and shared their sorrows. It was a fitting place to lay their history at rest. She had loved him for so long and so fiercely that the thought of giving up on this dream felt like death itself. But what else could she do when everything had been tried.
She wrapped her hands around her stomach and took a deep breath willing her soul to let go of this love for good this time. And as she glanced at the moon she drew strength from the place that had always offered comfort and solace from the pain.
"I have to let go of him. God, help me I have to let go of him before it kills me," she whispered silently to the night.
The truth had become startlingly clear as she had seen the couple enveloped in each others arms. If she continued down this path hoping that someday he might love her it would destroy her sanity. It was useless to hang on when she had already sacrificed everything even gambling her innocence in an attempt to make him love her. It was time to wake up to the reality that was staring at her in the face; he would never be hers. Now, she had a greater reason to be, the life that was growing within her clamored for attention.
"I'll live for you from now on," she lovingly caressed her abdomen.
"Whatever this life may bring it's going to be you and me against the world, kiddo. I want the best for you and I wish you could know him but I have enough love to carry both of us through. We'll be fine; we have to be fine," she added more to herself than to the child that was yet to be.
It burned, heavens, how it burned to realize that a happy ending wasn't in her future. Nevertheless, her heart refused to feel bitterness towards the man that had unwittingly destroyed it. If she couldn't make him happy she was glad that somebody could fill the darkness that she had always sensed lurking in his heart.
Life had given her a beautiful gift that would carry her through the lonely years that lay ahead. Her child would be her only love from now on; her life dedicated to the little person that would bring her immense joy and gratification. Oh but how she wished for things to be different; oh how she wished.
He looked at the lovely women he was holding in his arms, the shock and despair evident in his eyes. His heart was pounding furiously demanding that he run no fly towards the angel that had fled moments before in tears. He loved her, heavens how he loved her. In that moment he realized that throughout his life it had always been Serena with her undying optimism and love that had kept him from losing himself in darkness. It was her friendship that had anchored him to this world providing safety and joy and without her all he had to look forward were years of quiet desperation.
He took one last look at Glory trying to convey how remorseful he felt about their situation but in his heart the only thing that beat frantically was the sound of his voice urging him to locate Serena before it was too late. With a quick kiss to Glory's cheek he turned away from her and never looked back. He didn't see the shaky smile Glory gave him or the tears that ran down her beautiful face as she lifted a shaky hand and kissed her fingertips in a silent goodbye. Her soft words were lost in the corridors swallowed by walls that would never speak.
"Go Darien, run to her grab your happiness and never let go. Be happy my love," the sobs were shaking through her body as she silently whispered her farewell.
He could feel the desperation creeping through his soul as he searched the dark city for any sign of his love. All the hidden fears that he had tried to keep at bay were beginning to slither out, hammering at his soul, reminding him that he was destined to walk this life alone. He shook his head trying to dispel the scornful words from his head. But all around him the shadows mocked and taunted him, screaming that he would fail in his mission. He would find her. He had to find her failure was not an option.
The wind had started to pick up and the eerie silence of the night seemed to forewarn of imminent disaster. The blood in his veins simmered feverishly and her name kept repeating itself on his lips. Where was she? He had looked everywhere.
Her apartment had been empty and the few friends they had claimed they hadn't seen her. His mind kept tormenting him with sinister scenarios in which something ill had occurred. And suddenly every nightmare that he had ever had appeared to come to life with every minute of his search.
How could a man be so blind? Everything he had always wanted had been at his fingertips and all he had ever seen was a little girl with pigtails.
He had failed to see that in every hardship in every woe she had been standing right beside him.
He had failed to see that every smile that graced his countenance and every laugh that vibrated throughout his being was because of her.
He had failed to notice the love that shone brightly before him and instead tried to substitute it with lukewarm feelings that ended up hurting another woman that hadn't deserved the pain. Now, as he ran through the streets he hoped and he prayed that he wasn't too late.
"Please God let me find her. Let me make things right. Somehow let me keep her love although I don't deserve it."
It felt as if he had been looking for her for years when he had finally spotted the familiar blonde tresses at the park ahead. He slowed his step trying to control the unruly emotions that were playing mayhem with his thoughts.
Heavens but she was beautiful. It was all he could think of as he saw her profile illuminated by the moon. Funny but he had never noticed how well moonlight suited her. She was bathed in it and she glowed within it but even from afar he could read the loneliness and the anguish that racked her soul; agony that he had caused with his arrogance and indecisions. For a moment he felt his heart break at the thought that maybe just maybe he wouldn't be able to obtain her forgiveness
He wished he hadn't been so sightless.
He wished that he could make things right just by whispering her name.
He wished he could hold her again.
He wished he could capture her in his arms and steal her very essence.
He wished and he longed and when she finally turned to look at him with those impossibly soft sad blue eyes he knew he would move earth and heaven to obtain absolution.
Blue eyes met blue and in the silence that followed hope once again flourished in a heart that had been beaten and trampled.
Every dream she had ever had began and ended with the man that was standing before her. She had yearned to see him again; to feel him again. And now that she had him standing before her the words that had been at the tip of her tongue faded into the night. Her already distressed heart longed for a respite from all the turbulent emotions he evoked. Nevertheless in the deepest corner of her heart a small flicker of hope still burned.
However, the question remained, why is he here?
He was so beautiful and she loved him so much. Therefore, if he had come to ask for forgiveness she would grant it. She would grant it and let him go. Let him return to the woman he loved even if her heart screamed otherwise.
Darien could see the emotions that flitted across Serena's face from incredulity to desolation to love and finally to resignation and his heart resounded with joy. He could read the love burning in her eyes turning them into liquid pools of silver. His soul shouted with joy that it wasn't to late.
In that instant he vowed that as long as there was breath in his body he would do everything in his power make sure that she knew she was loved.
"All my life I have felt as I didn't fit in. There was always a part of me that refused to trust happiness even if it was being dangled right in front of me." He paused for a minute as he saw her beautiful face lift up staring at him with a puzzled look in her eyes.
His voice was strained with emotion as he continued, "I don't think I ever really let myself hope or believe in dreams the way you did. I could never comprehend how you could see the beauty in everything when all I saw was darkness."
His voice shook and stumbled and the tears were beginning to shimmer in his eyes. Serena began to think that maybe she was going insane after all. She had never seen this side to Darien; so open so vulnerable without the walls that always closed him away from the rest of the world.
"Darien its okay I-I know that you love her," she whispered brokenly. "If you feel guilty about what happened between us d-don't…" Her voice broke in mid sentence her heart refusing to whisper the goodbye that would take him away from her forever.
Darien forged on with his monologue as if he hadn't heard the words she had tried to speak.
"Except for my mother I never felt loved or special. There was always this voice that invaded my thoughts and persuaded me that the only thing feelings that I should be entitled with were self-pity, sadness and anger. For a long time those feelings alternated inside of me like an emotional rollercoaster."
Serena opened her mouth like she was going to cry or whisper but instead closed her lips together, gritting her teeth tightly. She did not know whether to call his name for he seemed lost in a memory or to offer a comforting hand that may be slapped away. So, she stayed quiet and hurt alongside with him feeling his pain as if it were her own.
Darien looked at the beautiful woman before him; a woman who had been wiling to sacrifice everything for him and he felt ashamed; ashamed that he hadn't recognized his feelings in time. Even know he could feel the empathy radiating from her being. She had her heart almost destroyed by the man she loved and still she was willing to put her feelings aside to comfort him. She believed he loved another. She thought his heart had been given away. However, how could he have given his heart to Glory when it had always belonged to Serena? After tonight there would never be a doubt as to who Darien Shields loved with all of his heart.
"Still, even through all the pain I've endured there had always been this girl who guarded my dreams; a funny girl who could be careless at times but very strong and very kind. It was in fact her kindness and affection that slowly brought back to life parts of me I had wanted to keep hidden. She never gave up on me not even once and in every crucial moment of my life she was there holding my hand. She is so beautiful that my heart jumps at the thought of her but it's not her physical appearance that has my heart in its grasp but the beauty that radiates from her soul. And every night that I go to bed I Wish and I pray and I murmur her name for it's a blessing in my life Serena…Serena"
The tears began to slide down her cheeks and the sobs racked her body uncontrollably as she heard the loveliest words she had ever heard whispered lovingly into the night. She had always hoped and prayed but having the reality of a dream come true surpasses every illusion she had ever had. She wanted to speak to tell him all that her heart held. She wanted to hear her name on his lips again. She longed to touch him to reassure herself that this night wasn't a figment of a deluded imagination. But all she could do was stand there and cry. All she could do was feel as his arms wrapped around her crushing her to his chest. After weeks of being denied the beauty of being held in his embrace every thought flew out of her head as she enjoyed the warmth of his hard body.
"I love you Serena. I love you. I love you. If you forgive me I promise to spend the rest of my life making it up to you. If you let this man love you I will give you paradise on earth and every day that we have together I will thank the heavens for the miracle they granted me. I want to spend the rest of my life by your side and I want to see my child growing inside of you. You are my family. You are every dream come true and I want see my tomorrow in your eyes. Please say you forgive me for being so dense and I will grant all of your wishes."
Serena lost herself in the fathomless blue eyes before her. She had always loved those intense brightly hued eyes and finally she was seeing in them all she had ever yearned for. She stroked his face memorizing every detail wiping the tears that had fallen there. She desired to engrave this moment in her memory forever. Later much later she would pull it out and remember the night her prince came home.
"Please…Serena please."
"I don't need you to grant me any wishes Darien, they all came true tonight. I love you Dari. I always have…I love you still…I always will."
He crushed her to his lips savoring the flavor of her tears mixed with his own realizing that this was all he had ever wanted; thanking the God's for blessing him and promising never to let go of the miracle that had been entrusted in his care.
"Let's go home princess," Darien took her hand in his and steered her towards their path but the shinning smile Serena gave him suddenly stopped him in his tracks.
Serena looked at Darien with all the love she had evident in every gesture and look. She rose on her tiptoes and gave him a quick peck on the lips; a mischievous smile suddenly splayed on her lips.
"Dari there is something I have to tell you," a sweet giggle was quickly covered by her hand. Darien didn't realize how soon one more of his wishes would be granted.
Hey guys I am truly sorry for how long it took me to come out with this chapter. I went through a tough stretch still dealing with the loss in my family. However, I greatly appreciate all of you guy's comments and reviews. I loved them every single one of them. I was so glad that somebody was still reading this story. I do apologize for the chapter; because it wasn't edited please bear with me. This was the final chapter I hope all of you enjoyed the story. Again THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to all those that reviewed I loved every comment and every word of encouragement. I do have an epilogue ready and it will come out this week I promise you for real this time. Thank you again reviewers. I do not own Sailor Moon
