A/N: I would like to apologize for being so late in getting this updated. I've had it written for awhile, but I wrote it on my typewriter and then my beta typed it up for me (Thank you, Allie!) and corrected it, then I had to add her corrections. Also, I added two of my friends and so some of my jokes won't be as funny for the reviewers. I'm sorry, but I wanted to thank them for all their hard work (you two know who you are) in helping me with my fanfic and so much more. Also, Allie (or TheFlyingMoose) who was my beta for this chapter, told me this one was a lot more formal than my others. My excuse for that is the fact that I was writing this on a typewriter (I guess that would technically be typing) and my only light was the soft glow of a kerosene lamp. So, no wonder I was formal! :-P Hope you all like this chapter, and that you think it was worth your wait.
Chapter Six
"Scintillating Six-Pack"
Harry had taken Claire's advice to take a shower. Well, the fact that Claire had locked him in the bathroom and wouldn't quit singing "Jingle Bells" until she heard the sound of running water had kind of 'helped' Harry along. Now Claire was somewhere in the castle, coaxing Ginny to come upstairs in what she assured Harry would be done in a 'sly and inconspicuous manner.' Harry didn't want to think about what she was doing. He didn't really want to think about what he was doing.
Harry was wrong about Claire's whereabouts. She had actually popped back to her house to call upon the assistance her friend, Tara. It didn't take much to convince Tara to go back to Hogwarts with Claire. When they were back at Hogwarts they immediately went to the Room of Requirement. For their purposes, it was equipped with two pieces of parchment, two magical quills and two Hogwarts uniforms.
"All right, Tara, step one: write letters. These magic quills that the Room of Requirement thought of are rather brilliant...as far as I can tell, they mimic the handwriting you're thinking of. In this case, we need to imitate Ron and Hermione's handwriting."
"What for?" Tara asked, still a little astounded by the fact that she was standing in Hogwarts.
"To ensure that they won't be anywhere near the Great Hall, for a reason I'll tell you later. " They started working on the letters.
"Ron has horrible handwriting," said Tara, squinting at the parchment. "It's a weird thing not to be able to read what you are writing." Claire didn't have the same problem--Hermione's handwriting was straight and perfect.
Mione-- Meet me in the Astronomy Tower in fifteen minutes. –Ron
Dear Ron, Meet me at the Astronomy Tower in fifteen minutes. Sincerely, Hermione Granger
"That sounds exactly like them," giggled Claire. "Nice work!" She high-fived
Tara and missed. "Okay, Tara, your task, should you chose to accept, is to sneak into the owlery and steal two owls. Ron is at Quidditch practice, and according to Harry, Hermione is doing her homework in the library, of course."
"Claire, I'm not James Bond... how am I supposed to sneak to the owlery undetected?"
"Accio Invisibility Cloak!" said Claire, waving her finger around in the air.
"You're going to poke someone's eye out!" yelped Tara as it narrowly missed her head. She had to duck once more as the Invisibility Cloak whooshed through the door.
"Now off you go!" said Claire. Tara saluted and attempted to click her heels together, failed miserably and quickly walked out of the room.
"Don't forget to put it on!" Claire called to Tara's retreating back.
"Shut up!" yelled Tara, hastily throwing it over her body. Claire laughed.
"And while Tara is doing that, I'll just pop by and see how Harry is coming along." ZAP!!!
Harry could hear a faint ZOING! come from outside of the bathroom where he was still taking a shower.
"Harry, can I come in?" he heard Claire yell.
"I'm flattered that you asked my permission," replied Harry.
"Oh, sod off!" replied Claire. Harry heard the door open and Claire come in.
"Jeez, It's steamy in here..." she complained.
"Well," replied Harry, "since I was forced to take a shower I figured I might as well enjoy myself."
"Yeah, well, I just wanted to pop by and see how you were doing. Now, do you remember all the points we discussed?" Harry inwardly groaned. The night before, Claire had drilled him on what to say, the appropriate amount of embarrassment he was to show and how to wear his towel most sexily. She had also tried to convince him to wear eyeliner, but he had firmly put his foot down. Everyone had his or her limit.
"Are you sure you don't want the eyeliner? It worked wonders for Johnny Depp," Claire continued.
"Claire, we went over this!" Harry replied, impatiently.
"Fine...your loss though. So, do you remember everything?"
"Yes, Claire," Harry said, mechanically.
"Good. If you screw up, don't come to me for pity."
"Your confidence in me is overwhelming."
"Then again, if all goes well, the credit goes to me." Harry rolled his eyes. "I saw that!"
"Hey, Claire, when can I get out of the shower?"
"When I alert you. Remember, tousled hair, pink cheeks, entire chest showing and saunter...like this!" Harry could hear some movement outside of the shower.
"Y'know, I can't see you."
"It's still fun to do!" she replied. "Well, good luck!" Harry heard a loud ZIP! and she was gone.
Finally, Harry thought.
Hey now! said Claire, in his head.
You're an all-star get your game on... a strange voice sang.
Shut up, Allie! said Claire. Harry shook his head. Now there were two voices?
Sorry, Harry, that was one of my friends. I kicked her out, though, don't worry. And now I'm going to leave.
Claire popped back into the Room of Requirement only to find Tara there with some Hogwarts student.
"What do you think you're doing?" yelped Claire.
"Well, I was bored, and he looked like he needed a friend.""I don't think friend is the right word for it," replied Claire. "Send him on his way!" Tara gave Claire the evil eye, but said goodbye to him anyway.
"Jeez, I can't leave you alone for more than five minutes! Did you get the owls sent?" Tara nodded. "Good. Now we have to disguise ourselves as Hermione and Ron and get Ginny to walk up to the boy's dormitory."
"I get to be Hermione!" yelled Tara's soon as Claire was finished with the instructions.
"Oh, no you don't!"
"I'll hurt you!" Tara rose up a fist. Claire flinched. "Two for flinching!" exclaimed Tara as she gave Claire two punches on the arm.
"Hey, you better watch it," said Claire, "I'm fatter than you are. I could flatten you." Tara still wouldn't give up.
"Fine," said Claire, "besides, Ron gets to talk to Ginny, anyway." Tara frowned.
"Dangit!" she said.
"Anyway, we've got to hurry. Here, get into these robes and I'll get into mine." Suddenly, two dressing rooms appeared. They hurriedly changed and then Claire used her magical powers to transform them into Ron and Hermione. "Okay, now we must go down to the Great Hall." They thanked the room and left.
Ginny was strolling down the hallways. It was a weekend, and she didn't really have anything to do. All of her friends had dates somewhere...Ginny couldn't remember her last date. It was with Dean, but they had broken up ages ago. Suddenly, she had this great urge to go to the Great Hall. It was as if some unseen force was pulling her there. She followed willingly...she had nothing better to do. Finally, when she got to the Great Hall, the first people she noticed were Ron and Hermione. They were sitting at one of the tables leaning over books. It looked like they were studying, but noting the flush on both their faces and the fact that they were looking at each other more than the books; Ginny assumed no studying was actually being done. Suddenly, Ron looked Ginny's way. He said something to Hermione, then got up and walked towards her.
"Sis, can I ask you to do me a huge favour?" Ginny sighed. Claire, cleverly disguised as Ron, took that as a yes and continued on, "Up in my room there should be a book. It's red and it's a library book. In fact...I think it is lying on my bed. Could you go get it for me?" Ginny may have been bored, but not that bored.
"You go get it, lazy arse!" she said, turning to go out of the doors. Ron tugged on her arm and Ginny reluctantly turned around.
"Well...you see...me and Hermione are making a lot of progress on our...erm...reports and I don't really want to leave in the middle of it...it could...um...interrupt our...erm...creative process. Umm...yeah." Judging by the colour of Ron's face, Ginny could tell that he and Hermione were having a wonderful time. Ginny sighed once more. She was a sucker for romance.
"Fine, but you owe me big time." Ron looked at her with adoration.
"You know, you always were my favourite sister."
"I'm your only sister, Ron," but Ron had already rushed back to a glowing Hermione. Ginny left the room and headed towards the Gryffindor common room. Little did she know Claire and Tara were following right behind under Harry's invisibility cloak. Claire was updating Harry the whole way.
All right, we've just passed the painting of a plum...she's climbed on the stairs...the stairs are moving...All right, they've led her to the Fat Lady...she's saying the password...get ready...oh, the Fat Lady is talking to her...wait for it...she's inside! Now she's headed for the stairs to the dormitory...get ready Harry, she's opening the door...NOW! Harry's mind was clear of Claire. That was part of the agreement...Claire couldn't watch or help Harry along via mind talk.
"I'm nervous for my little boy!" said Claire as she and Tara plopped on the couches.
"He'll do wonderfully," replied Tara, reaching for a book.
Harry made one last check in the mirror. Then, tensely, he stepped out of the bathroom. He forced himself to saunter nonchalantly, even though he was nervous. He walked towards Ron's bed...and then he saw her. Ginny Weasley, the love of his life. She looked up and gasped.
"Harry!?!?!" she exclaimed. Harry could see her eyes travel down to what Claire called his 'scintillating six pack.' Her blush heightened. "I'm so sorry, I should...have knocked," she continued, trying to keep her eyes away from Harry's bare chest.
"That's fine," Harry said in a laid back voice. Is that me talking? thought Harry.
"Um, Ron wanted me to get him a book, and so I came up here to get it..."
"Is it this book?" Harry asked, turning around to pick it up off his bed. He handed it to Ginny.
"Umm, looks like it. Well, I...I...I'd b-better leave..."
"Hey, wait, Gin...are you doing anything today?"
AHHH! He called me Gin! Ginny thought. "Umm...well, I have to get this book to Ron," Harry chuckled.
"No, I mean after that."
"Um...no...why?" she almost squeaked.
"D'you want to, I dunno, walk around the lake? Or you could ride my broomstick or something..." Ginny tried her hardest to ignore all the sexual innuendo in that simple sentence. She couldn't...her blush heightened even more.
"Um, well, err, sure, I would love to..." Don't say it. Don't say it! "...Ride your broomstick." SHE SAID IT!!!!!
"Great," replied Harry. "I can't go out like this so, I'll meet you in the common room in fifteen minutes. Unless of course, you'd like to stay and watch." He winked at her.
"Er...n-no thanks. I'll just see you in the common room in f-fifteen minutes." Ginny hustled out of the dormitory. A second later, Claire and Tara popped into the room.
"How did it go?!" they both yelled in unison.
"Did you use my 'ride my broomstick' line?" asked Claire.
"Don't have time to talk right now, I'm meeting Ginny in fifteen minutes."
They both squealed and insisted on helping him with his outfit.
"You should have said to meet her in an hour! It would have given us more time to find your perfect outfit," said Tara, desperately looking through his trunks. Realizing he didn't have much of a selection, Claire transformed a black loose t-shirt of Harry's into a tight black turtleneck sweater. Meanwhile, Tara worked her magic on one of Harry's old jeans, making them flare out at the ends, where his feet donned black cons. She also changed the shape of the jeans so they would fit him more tightly. Claire didn't make him wear eyeliner (much to Harry's relief) and they left his hair alone. Finally he pulled away from them.
"I've got to go!" he exclaimed.
"Good luck, Harry!" said Claire, giving him a huge hug. She slyly sprayed some cologne on him before he could protest.
"Have fun, Harry!" said Tara. "If Ginny ever ditches you, I'm always available!"
"Don't listen to her, Harry. I'm your second choice, right?" Claire winked. Harry grinned and sauntered out of the room.
"Well, for now, I think our work here is done," said Claire, turning to Tara.
"Let's spy on them!" said Tara, not ready to leave Hogwarts yet.
"Why, that would be unethical. We'd be invading on Harry's privacy." Tara looked at Claire, amazed. "I was joking, dum-dum, of course we're going to spy on them!" She grabbed the invisibility cloak and followed Harry's tracks.
Ginny was sitting on an easy chair in the common room, staring into the flames and thinking about Harry. She had gone out with several boys just to try to convince herself, and others, that her childish crush on Harry was gone. And while her childish crush on Harry was gone, it had been replaced with something much greater. "Gin!" She looked up and saw Harry descending the stairs. Her jaw dropped. He was gorgeous. She didn't know how she was going to speak.
"Hi, Harry," she swallowed. Good, good, she managed to say two words without pausing or adding 'erm's. She could do this. She wasn't going to let some guy (even Harry Potter) make her all worked up. She wanted revenge on him for making her blush and stutter, so she added: "You're looking sexy." Harry blushed. HA! Ginny thought. Two can play at this game.
Harry was amazed. He was supposed to be cocky and flirty, not her! She looked sexy, too. She was wearing a purple v-neck sweater that clung in all the right places and dark jeans that showed off her lovely curves. Her red hair was swept back in a loose ponytail and wisps of hair framed her face. She had put a small amount of makeup on, Harry noticed, but she still looked pretty natural. He felt like he should comment on her appearance as well.
"You look gorgeous, too," he replied, grinning.
"Why thank you," she said coyly.
"Shall we?" asked Harry, offering an arm. Ginny almost giggled.
"We shall," she said, raking the offered arm. They strolled to the Quidditch pitch. It was overrun with students.
"On second thought, let's just take a walk," said Harry. Ginny silently curse all of the students. She was looking forward to being held by Harry as they flew in the sky. Still, seeing how things were going, she might be held by Harry before the evening was out, broom or no broom.
Tara and Claire were still following them. They were enjoying themselves very much.
"They are soooo cute," Claire whispered.
"I know," replied Tara.
"Mind you, Harry wouldn't be doing half as well without my tutelage."
"Claire?"
"What?"
"Shut up." She did, and they continued to listen to Harry and Ginny's conversation.
"Y'know," said Ginny, "I never did actually give Ron the book that he wanted."
"Don't worry about it," replied Harry.
"How long do you think it's going to take for Hermione and him to officially hook up?"
"Not long. Unless of course, Ron goes and blows it, like he usually does."
"I know, he's such a bonehead."
"A bonehead, eh?" asked Harry, laughing at Ginny's vocabulary.
"Yes, bonehead. And don't laugh at my vocabulary, Harry. I've heard you use some pretty interesting words today."
"That's me rubbing off on him," Claire whispered to Tara, proudly.
"I wasn't laughing at your vocabulary. I actually think it's rather cute." Ginny rolled her eyes.
"Oh, yes, that was definitely the look I was going for," said Ginny, sarcastically.
They strolled along happily, enjoying the weather and each other's company. Claire was sobbing on Tara's shoulder, theatrically.
"Just yesterday he was so small and helpless, and now he's so big and independent. Soon he isn't going to need me anymore, Tara! I just don't know what I'm going to do! It all happened so fast. I don't know what's next...smoking, sex...he might move out of the house!" Tara was trying her hardest not to laugh at Claire. She wouldn't, normally, but she didn't want to disturb Harry and Ginny.
Finally Harry checked his watch. "It's getting pretty late; we probably should start heading back." Neither he nor Ginny wanted the walk to end but Ginny knew that Ron would go crazy if he didn't see her soon.
"Okay," sighed Ginny.
"Don't look sad yet, we've still got quite a long walk back to the castle." Ginny smiled. While they were walking Harry's hand brushed against hers. They both tried to ignore the electric chills that went up their arms. Ginny wanted to hold Harry's hand, but she didn't want to make the first move. Luckily for Ginny, Claire's teaching had made Harry bolder. He grabbed Ginny's hand. They walked like this all the way back to the castle until they saw Ron run towards them. They leapt apart.
"Where have you been?" asked Ron when he reached them.
"Well," replied Ginny before Harry could say anything, "I was just taking a walk around the lake, and was just headed back when I saw Harry. We were going to go back up to the common room."
"Oh," replied Ron. "Well, did you see Hermione when you were out? I've been looking all over for her."
"How did you lose her?" asked Ginny. "Last I saw, you two were "
"You saw us in the Astronomy Tower?" exclaimed Ron. "But...how?"
"Ginny was just kidding, "said Harry. He figured Claire had something to do with this and he'd have to cover for her. Luckily Ginny didn't question Harry, but just nodded. Harry would have to tell her later.
"But, why were you in the Astronomy Tower?" asked Harry, trying to change the subject. It worked. Ron got flustered.
"Well, see, we both got owls from the other person saying to meet them in the Astronomy Tower. I went 'cos I thought maybe Hermione...um...wanted to tell me something about the homework." Ron coughed uncomfortably. "I get up there and Hermione's there, but she said she had gotten an owl from me and wanted to know why I wanted to meet her. I denied it and told her I had gotten an owl from her and then..." Ron trailed off as if something had happened that he didn't want to talk about.
"Ron, if you made a pass at Hermione, it's okay, we both know you have a huge crush on her," said Ginny. Ron looked astonished.
"You...do?"
"Yes, now go on." Still a little amazed, Ron continued his story.
"Anyway, then I said we might as well hang out, seeing as how we were both up there, and she agreed. It was going really, really great, and I mean really great, but then she mentioned something that "Krummy" had told her, and...well..."
"Let me guess. It ended up with a big row between you and Hermione, and now she's said she never wants to speak to you again," said Ginny.
"Umm, yeah, something like that."
"Well, bud," said Harry, patting him on the shoulder, "That should teach you not to get madly jealous every time Hermione mentions another guy, especially Krum. Now go plead for forgiveness and ask her to Hogsmeade tomorrow. Nothin' like butterbeer to make one feel forgiving." Ron just nodded. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'd like to go to the common room with Ginny. 'Nite, Ron. Good luck with Hermione." Harry patted Ron on the shoulder one more time and dragged Ginny to the common room.
"Since when did you become so wise, Harry?" teased Ginny when they were seated in front of the fire.
"I've always been wise. Besides, Ron and Hermione need to get together already!"
"I agree."
"Well, Gin, I'm exhausted."
"It's only seven thirty!" cried Ginny.
"It's not easy being beautiful all day, Gin. I need my beauty sleep so I can have an equally sexy day tomorrow. I had a good time. We should do this more often." Harry leaned over and gave Ginny a soft kiss on the cheek. This was too much for Claire, who was still watching. She collapsed into tears.
"What is that?" asked Ginny looking around.
"Uhh...probably one of the ghosts. Anyway, g'night, my dear." He got up and walked up the stairs, leaving Ginny dumbfounded on the couch. Once Harry was by himself, he breathed a sigh of relief. He fell on his bed and closed his eyes, trying to relive every moment of that day (at least, the ones without Claire in them). Suddenly, Claire was right beside him.
"You kicked ASS!" yelled Claire, jumping on the bed.
"Where did Tara go?" asked Harry.
"She left. She was tired of being cried on. Besides, with just you and me it's like old times."
"I knew it was you crying!!! Did you follow us the whole time?"
"Yeah..."
"Claire!" he yelled, throwing a pillow at her.
"Oh, come on, you expect me to leave during the most exciting part? Harry, you know me better than that."
"Well, you completely ruined mine and Ginny's moment!"
"I'm sorry, Harry, it's just...it's just..." she collapsed into tears and flew on Harry's chest. Harry awkwardly put his arms around her and rocked her back and forth comfortingly. Suddenly, he heard laughing. He pulled her away from him and saw that she hadn't really been crying.
"What was that all about?" asked Harry. Claire grinned sheepishly.
"I just wanted you to hold me in those big manly arms of yours." She giggled. "You completely fell for it!" Harry reached for the thing closest to him and threw it at her. Luckily, it was just a pillow.
"Hey! Dillhole!" she cried throwing it back at him. Suddenly, they heard voices from behind the door, the door creaked open, and in stepped Ron. Thankfully, Claire had already disappeared from the room. She had left Harry with two pillows thrown haphazardly around his bed. Harry had one in his hand that he was planning on throwing at Claire, but her disappearance had left him in an awkward position.
"Umm, what are you doing, Harry?" asked Ron, closing the door.
"Err, rearranging the...um...rearranging my bed."
"Okay. Hey, do you know what the matter with Ginny is?"
"Why?" asked Harry.
"Well, she was outside the boys' dormitory door crying, and when I came by she ran into the girls' dormitory." Harry thought on it awhile. Suddenly it dawned on him.
Oh no...thought Harry.
A/N: Now...to thank my reviewers!
Scrawny Ronnie: Why thank you! I have written more! I hope you laughed.
Miss Effie: Thank you, I—wait a minute, that's me, isn't it? (bad joke, sorry...)
Harry's4menotu (which I would like to disagree with but...): You'll find out in this EXCLUSIVE chapter. grin (The astricks better work this time...last time they didn't and it pissethed me off.)
MyOwnLittleWorld: Thank you for helping me to my computer. I got kind of lost on the way...and I made a detour to the kitchen, but here I am!
MovieFan...know what? I'm just gunna call you the MF, sound good?: Got another cookie for me? Thanks for reviewing! You rock!
JerryGirl: You owe me a cookie now.
TheFlyingMoose: evil laughter
TT: Wow...what does TT stand for? Terrible Temptress? [giggles] Well, thank you for reviewing...keep doin' just that!
Angelique Durann: Welcome, welcome. Take off your coat and stay awhile! By the way, why were you typing one-handed-ly? Did you have a cookie for me in the other hand? [giggle]
Now, all you lot that HAVEN'T reviewed my story yet (and there are some, I've looked on my stats, and some people have me on there and they HAVEN'T REVIEWED! You know who you are...)! Please review. I mean, seriously, I really appreciate the reviews, and I love getting them. If you like my story (and I hope you do, since you're reading it) why would you not want to review and tell me that? THERE IS NO EXCUSE, NO EXCUSE! WE WILL DO UP-DOWNS UNTIL BLUE IS NO LONGER TIRED, OR—wait, erm, I mean, WE WILL DO UP-DOWNS UNTIL EVERYONE WHO READ THIS STORY REVIEWS!!! THAT MEANS YOU! [breathes heavily] I need a drink of water...
P.S. That was a "Remember the Titans" reference, in case you didn't know, in honor of my friend, Tara.
