Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

Notes: So here's the followup to my big action/drama chapter. Might not be exactly what you expected or what you hoped for, but put your faith in me and I will try my damndest to deliver eventually!

I've gotten so many great reviews, especially to the last chapter, that I just couldn't help but respond to individuals. This may or may not become a habitual practice - Probably not because I feel guilty that I can't respond to everyone. But here are the review responses I couldn't help but write - if you have time to read them it might be beneficial because there's a lot of answers to questions and explinations in them - as well as a few possible hints about things to come! Also - if you didn't get a response and want one, or if you review in the future and really want a response, you can email me and I'll definitely get back to you, though I can't promise it'll be the same day. ^_^

Response to Reviews:

LinaNverse - Yep, started school the 6th - I go to school near Boston @ Wellesley, and spring semester doesn't start till the beginning of February, but we have a wintersession where they offer some random stuff that's mostly for fun, and you get to live on campus with all your friends and pretty much just chill away from home (I love my family, but I love being on my own more!) - and best of all it's free. (Or as free as anything in college is, which is not free at all. =P)

LinaNverse, zee-donk & Chri - Kikyo comes from a pretty powerful family, and because of that feels a competitive edge with Kagome. She's a little jealous of Kagome's family history, which in her eyes is better than hers, although that may or may not be true in reality. She also resents Kagome and her family for having the money for slaves and yet not owning them - she's a little afraid of a new precident being set that will cause herself and her family to be looked down on for owning slaves, and a little afraid of Kagome's desire to free slaves. And maybe deep deep DEEP down, she knows that slavery and her attitude toward slaves is wrong, so she acts in a way that reinforces her belief system and talks as though Kagome and those who agree with her are naïve/crazy/ridiculous. In truth, she could probably follow through on her threats to make Kagome miserable - most likely by using Inuyasha against her (ie. Turning her in for her abnormal treatment of him (letting him do whatever he wants, etc.)). The law would probably take Kikyo's side - EXCEPT that after Sesshoumaru inadvertently hurt Kagome, they're both sort of stuck - they both have leverage against the other so they're keeping quiet. (Of course, Kagome would never go to court over what happened with Sesshoumaru because she doesn't think he deserves to be punished, but Kikyo doesn't know that, and even if she suspects it she won't take that chance.)

If Kikyo had killed Inuyasha she wouldn't have been in trouble. She doesn't have the right to randomly kill slaves, but she had the right to object to him wearing clothes that were above slaves, and after he told her to fuck off it was all over. If anyone found out that he said that he'd be in MAJOR trouble - most likely made a part of the hive (the computer chip slaves) since he's too valuable to just kill. But killing him was within her power after he rebelled like that - slaves with ambition, ideas, and spirit in general are dangerous and it's illegal to allow a slave to act out against anyone.

Saiera - I laughed out loud when I read your review! Sorry, no tripping and falling, but try not to worry - leave Kikyo to me. *cackle* Though I have to warn you guys, I don't hate Kikyo, and I don't believe that anyone is truly and completely evil. But you'll see what I have in store for her eventually. (Side note: Someone commented a while ago about how Kikyo was really kind and compassionate while she was alive, and I know that's true, but the only real experience of her character I get is the angry, cold, cheated side, and so that's how I'm writing her.)

Rei Woo - About Kagome's eyes yes, I realized that she had brown eyes eventually (I'm not very observant ~_^) but it was already too late - I've read blue in a few other stories so I guess it was in my head while I was writing. Thanks for the clarification, and sorry for the inaccuracy!

ArtemisMoon - Thank you! Your review really means a lot since I read and adored and worshiped your story 'Easy as 1, 2, 3'. You're a fantastic writer and I hope you find the time and inspiration to write something else at a point in the future!

Shahrezad1 - wow when you put it that way it really does sound complex! But I think what it comes down to is Kagome encouraging Inuyasha to think outside the box, and his subsequent realization that he *can* give meaning to his life, and that no matter what people do to him or take away from him, he always has himself to fall back on. It was a major self-confidence and maturity boost for him, and he suddenly found meaning in a life that was previously spinning out of his control. Now if he can only get a chance to act on it

Mara-chan - Thanks for your amazing review! I'm really flattered that you like it so much - I had no idea I would get such a positive response posting my story here. I definitely know where this story is going and have most of it planned out, but I do consider reviews carefully - they're especially helpful because I can see what people are confused about and clarify either in the story, or in the notes. Thanks again, you're wonderful!

Animelover - You'll just have to wait and see about Rin and our favorite demon lord!

Ryuko - I'm honored that you took the time to review my story! ^_^ I'm glad you think everyone is in character, I tried really hard to get them right. Hope you continue to read and enjoy!

Imoen - Thanks for being such a faithful reviewer, and once again, congrats on your lovely story! It's progressing really well - I was so happy when Inuyasha was pronounced free - and of course when Houjou got his ass kicked. ~_^ Can't wait to read more!

Bunni Girl - First, thank you for your review - it's one of my favorites! I'm glad you like the story so far and that you agree with my plot development decisions. As for your questions - Many people have complained both about the length of the chapters and about their infrequency. I completely understand and sympathize with where you guys are coming from as I'm in your shoes as well as an avid fanfic reader in several genres. Unfortunately this is the best I can do without detracting from my real life responsibilities. Hope you continue to enjoy the fic despite all that!

Julia-Tears - You made some really great points I'd like to address. First of all, the issue of Kagome's "order" not to take orders. This was made in only semi-seriousness, and Inuyasha knows that it doesn't really apply in the real world because Kagome can't give him an order that forces him to break laws or codes of conduct for slaves. That kinda goes against the idea that slaves have to obey their masters no matter what, but it makes sense if you think about it - if Kagome ordered Inuyasha to fly, he just couldn't do it - it's not within his power. Same with not obeying orders anymore... it's outside his control because he'd get punished for it even though he was ordered to do it. That brings me to your next point which is that shouldn't masters decide on punishments for their slaves and screw everyone who disagrees with their decisions? The answer is yes and no - Yes, if the decisions don't break laws. But if the decisions do break laws - like a slave not taking orders anymore - then outside influences step in. Allowing a slave to dress normally isn't specifically against the law, but it sets a dangerous precident for other slaves and can give them ideas. Kikyo would have brought up that point in court, and the law would have ruled in her favor. So the whole situation is really complex and is pretty much screwing over Kagome and Inuyasha at every turn.

Everyone else: You are all amazing, wonderful, inspiring people, and I am truly and deeply regretful that there are not enough hours in the day for me to respond to each and every one of you and give you the attention you deserve for being such faithful readers who are so generous with praise and constructive criticism. Enjoy the story!


Learning to Let Go

Chapter 18: Reality Check.

"Hurry up," Kagome urged Inuyasha, hovering next to him as he made his way up the stairs to her house. She just wanted to get him inside and make sure he was going to be okay. The bleeding seemed to have stopped, but the wide hole in his shirt was making her sick to her stomach, and the dried blood covering him wasn't helping.

Finally getting him into her living room, she led him toward the couch. He resisted. "I'm going to get blood all over everything."

Kagome gave him an incredulous glance. "How can you think I'd care about something like that? Just sit down and take off your shirt so I can make sure you're okay!"

He glared down at her. "I'm fine! You can just go to bed or study or something, because this is no big deal."

Kagome clenched her fists. "It is a big deal! Inuyasha, there's a gaping hole in your chest! Don't pretend it's not hurting you!"

"This is nothing compared to what I used to get during a battle back at the academy! At least I didn't revert!" He paused as Kagome reached determinedly for the buttons on his shirt. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I'm taking off your shirt. Unless you're going to cooperate and do it yourself, in which case I'll go get the first aid kit in the kitchen."

The bold move affected Inuyasha more than he'd like to admit. The hole in his chest put a damper on any of his usual responses to such a statement, but he couldn't help but consider other situations where she might undress him. He caught her hands and pulled them away. "I'll do it," he snarled, wanting to put distance between them.

She paused, then nodded, turning and heading for the other room. He sighed in relief and ran a hand through his hair. What a fucking mess.

With an annoyed growl, he finished unbuttoning where Kagome had left off and peeled the blood-soaked garment away from his skin, wincing as clotted blood was pulled free of his wound. Sesshoumaru really was a bastard.

He balled up the shirt and tossed it into the nearby waste basket, crossing his arms over his chest. A moment later, Kagome reentered carrying a box full of medical supplies.

She stopped short in shock at the sight of him, her eyes fixed on the bloody tear in the center of his chest, which was liberally smeared with his blood. He glared at her. "What?"

She jumped at his defensive snarl, her eyes flicking to his face, full of concern. "I should take you to the hospital - how can you still be standing with a wound like that?"

Inuyasha resisted the urge to roll his eyes. The pain had faded to an aching throb rather than the sharp, piercing stab he'd been experiencing before. He could already feel his body knitting itself back together and he was willing to bet there wouldn't even be a scar left by morning. "No hospital. If you let me wash the blood off I can go to sleep and - "

"Isn't it bad for you to get wet?" Kagome argued. "What if you collapse in the shower?"

This time he couldn't help rolling his eyes. "I'm not going to collapse, damn it! What kind of pathetic excuse for a demon do you think I am?"

She flinched back slightly, and he abruptly regretted being so rough. "Will you at least let me put a bandage on after you get out of the shower?" she asked hopefully.

He sighed. He just wanted to be left alone. "Fine," he snapped, heading toward the bathroom. The warm water soothed his tense muscles, and he leaned his hands against the tiled wall, letting the blood wash off his body. He was reluctant to go back out and face Kagome, but he forced himself to put on a clean pair of pants and return to the living room where she was sitting quietly on the couch, frowning, lost in her own thoughts.

She looked up as he entered, fingers tightening on the bandage in her lap. She gave him a weak smile. "It doesn't look so bad now that it's clean," she offered uncertainly.

"Keh." He settled himself on the floor in front of her, his expression set. "Just get this over with."

Her fingers were gentle and tentative as she began to bind up the wound, wrapping strips of gauze around it firmly but carefully. He felt warmth spread wherever her fingertips grazed his skin, and involuntarily began to relax. "I'm sorry," she whispered as she finished wrapping the gauze around his chest and secured it with a pin.

He snorted incredulously. "For what?"

"I left you alone - again - I should have known better after last time - "

At the salty scent of her tears, Inuyasha turned to face her in disbelief. She sniffed, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand. "Why are you crying?" he asked, completely confused. "I didn't think Sesshoumaru hurt you badly." He reached out to brush her hair away from the side of her neck to see if he'd misjudged the severity of her wound.

She shook her head angrily, catching his hand to keep him from touching her. "I'm not crying because I'm hurt, you jerk! I don't care about that. I'm crying because *you* were hurt!"

He blinked, too astonished to respond as she continued to cry quietly, refusing to meet his eyes. "You're crying for me?" he echoed quietly, not pulling his wrist from her grip. It was too strange of a concept to really grasp.

She looked up to meet his eyes, anguish shining through in her smoky gaze. "What if I hadn't gotten there in time? What if she'd killed you, Inuyasha?"

He frowned. "You would have cared if I died?" He had never really thought about it. He'd always assumed he would go out of the world silently, unknown and unmissed. The thought that she would have cried, the way she was crying now, was a bitter-sweet warmth in his chest. He didn't want her to cry, but it was consoling to know that he was worth so much in her eyes.

He blinked in surprise as she lifted her head to glare at him furiously even though she was still crying. "How can you say that?" she shrieked at him, and he had to flatten his ears to his head to protect them from the volume of it. Now what had he done?

She dropped his hand and clenched her fists, trembling with rage and the aftershock of fear. "Of course I would have cared," she hissed at him. "How could you think I wouldn't?"

He glared back defensively. "You have no right to talk like that!" he shouted back at her. "I've lived alone until now. No one's ever cared before, so don't complain about it!"

She reached out to him involuntarily, unable to resist the raw bitterness in his tone. In that moment she wanted nothing more than to take away all of his pain, to replace the tragedy he'd endured with something warmer, happier.

He froze under her touch, and Kagome hastened to reassure him further, slipping off the couch to her knees and wrapping her arms around him. She was careful of the bandages on his chest, making sure not to put pressure on the wound as she buried her face in his shoulder and held his tense, resisting body.

It took a long moment for him to relax, and he slowly began to respond to the embrace. She sighed as she felt his arms come up around her, pull her closer. He was warm, and she could feel the strength that radiated off him.

After a moment she lifted her head to look up at him, her heart beating faster as she realized how close their faces were. His eyes were a clear, warm gold and she could see the uncertainty behind his usually impenetrable defenses. "What'd you do to make Kikyo so mad, anyway?" she asked him, partly to diffuse the building tension between them.

To her surprise, he grinned dangerously at the memory. "I told her to fuck off."

Kagome's eyes widened, and she choked on her laughter. "No wonder she wanted to kill you. I wish I could have seen it."

They stared at each other some more and Kagome's smile faded. When she spoke next it was in a hushed whisper. "It's my fault all of this happened. I made you dress that way - You tried to tell me but I wouldn't listen, and if anyone else finds out then you'll be in even more trouble - "

He shook his head. "You didn't know."

"I should have listened to you!"

"You still wouldn't have done anything differently, so don't bother trying to use that as an excuse. You live in your own reality, Kagome. You felt guilty about owning me - you wanted to justify it somehow by not treating me like a possession so you ignored the real world and everything horrible that happens there. You created what you wanted to see."

She blinked in amazement. He was right; she'd been trying to assuage her own feelings of guilt by realizing her ideal through Inuyasha. She'd been stringing him along with a false projection of a dream that could never be. But now defeat and helplessness were making her weaker, sapping her energy and her determination. Seeing clearly for the first time in her life, she felt tears fill her eyes again. She couldn't change the fact that he was a slave. She couldn't change society to fit her own beliefs.

"I was stupid," she whispered. "I wouldn't listen. I wouldn't accept the truth."

They were still looking at each other, but something had changed now. Reality, perhaps - the illusions she'd created crashing down around their ears. The real world was manifesting itself. Life - cold, cruel and indifferent, couldn't care less about their problems. There was no greater good, no moral high ground. There was just Kagome and Inuyasha, who were powerless to fight the tidal wave of conformity that was sweeping them along with it.

"It's over now," Inuyasha said, and Kagome nodded, feeling her heart breaking. The night's ordeal was over, and so were a lot of other things. Defeated, she slumped back against Inuyasha, feeling empty.

She couldn't make a difference, not even in the life of one person.


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More angst! But there's minor fluff too! Next chapter is giving me hell, but I like the way it's coming out. So it should be posted within a reasonable amount of time.

And for the curious - no, Inuyasha and Kagome don't fall asleep in eachother's arms... As you'll see in the next chapter, Kagome quite boringly goes up to bed, and Inuyasha sleeps on the couch as per usual. Sorry if this disapoints you, but it just seemed too cliche to have them sleep together, and they're both too depressed to get all cuddly and kissy at the moment. When they finally do fall in love/realize they're in love with eachother I want it to be more deliberate and meaningful. The trauma of the night did bring them infinitely closer though, as I hope you could tell a little bit both here and in the last chapter.

I did play around with the idea of Inuyasha having nightmares and Kagome comforting him in the middle of the night, but that also seemed cliche and I really don't think Inuyasha's the type to have nightmares since he deals with his anger and fear in the moment he feels them, and doesn't seem to repress his emotions or dwell on things much. Nor is he the type to accept comfort after doing something as horrifyingly vulnerable as screaming in his sleep. ~_^