Yay, reviews! I feel so loved! I'm so sorry for not updating; it took me a while to shake off writer's block. But hopefully I'll get back into the swing of things now.
This chapter is dedicated to darkmetaldragonfangs, my good mate on So this is for you. Thanks for all your support!
Atemu heaved a sigh and leaned back against the cold stone wall. After about three hours of running like crazed lunatics the duo and Bennu had managed to make it to a small but deep canyon many safe miles from the evil cannibalistic children.
"I'm pooped." He said, lacing his hands together and leaning his head back on them. "Being a hero sure does make a guy hungry. What's for supper?"
"Hero?" Jazii repeated indignantly. "Hero?! You didn't DO anything! I was the one saving your ass back there you know."
Atemu pouted. "But I bet you've never saved an ass quite as nice as mine."
"Oh you are so full of yourself!" Jazii chucked a kettle at Atemu's head. "Ow!" He cried, rubbing his ear, even though the kettle hit his forehead.
"You don't have to be so grumpy." Bennu chirped and landed on Atemu's knee, tipping his head on one side as if to say 'what's her problem?'
Atemu shrugged. "It's probably just her time of the month. Remember how angry Isis would get? Her favourite pastime was chucking large, heavy, inanimate objects at my head. Much like Jazii is doing now." Atemu replied cheerfully.
He huffed. "Girls. I just don't get them."
Jazii turned, curious. "Who's Isis? Was she your girlfriend?"
Atemu shrieked and shook his head wildly. "Ew! No! She was my priestess. You know, the wooo I told you about. Now make me some supper!"
Jazii rolled her eyes. "Yeah, the wooo. And I'm not doing what you want me to do. Who died and made you king?"
Atemu blinked. "My father."
"So you're still hanging onto the belief you're some heroic Pharaoh who sacrificed himself to save all mankind?"
"It's not a belief, it's real! You'll see someday."
"Yeah, sure. Just go back to fairyland."
"You didn't answer my question either! What are we having for supper? The sooner we eat the sooner I can get some shut-eye. Someone as good-lookin' as me needs his beauty sleep."
"Is that so?" Jazii said dryly. "Then you sure need a lot of it to make you handsome. And we're not having anything for supper. If you want something then make it yourself."
"Sheesh, get all antsy then. Huh. Imagine sending a guy to sleep with no supper. What is the world coming to?!"
Bennu cheeped in agreement.
"Shut up and sleep already!"
--
Silence.
Thud.
Thud.
Thud.
Girlish scream.
Atemu shrieked and shielded his face with his hands, pleading for mercy. "Please, no! Anything but that!"
Jazii grinned maliciously and held up the most evil of all bathroom accessories: hair gel.
"It's time we straightened out your hair Atemu." She said, grabbing a comb. "It's impractical and we need to take care of it. Now hold still and –"
"Nooooooo!" Atemu cried. "You'll never take me alive!" He ran and hid behind Bennu. "Save me Bennu, protect me from the evil cow."
"Evil cow?!" Jazii screamed. "EVIL COW?!?!?! Why you little – get back here!"
Jazii chased Atemu round and round the canyon armed with a comb and hair gel, while Atemu chased Bennu screaming for the phoenix to help. And Bennu chased Jazii just for the hell of it.
Atemu closed his eyes and muttered darkly about evil cows chasing him. Suddenly, he thought he heard a moo behind him.
Turning, Atemu shrieked as he realised Jazii wasn't chasing him anymore. Instead, a giant cow had taken her place.
Jazii gasped and looked at her hands – well, hooves. She clicked them together, horrified. Then her face twisted into a mask of fury and her eyes bulged out in all directions.
She mooed ferociously and lunged for Atemu. "Ahhh! Save me somebody, ANYBODY! A giant cow is attacking me!"
Atemu screeched and dashed round the canyon like a madman. To Bennu, he honestly believed his master WAS a madman.
"Why do these things always happen to me? Life is so unfair! I take back what I said Jazii! You're not really a cow!"
"Of course I'm not you idiot!"
Atemu turned and stared back at the human Jazii. He blinked slowly, realisation dawning upon him. Then, he grinned mischievously.
"You're a cow." Jazii was a cow again. She mooed in anger and thrust her scythe at Atemu. He shrieked.
"You're not a cow!" Jazii-the-human scowled.
"You're a cow!" Jazii-the-cow mooed.
"You're not a cow!" Evil glare.
"Cow!"
"No cow!"
"Cow!"
"No cow!"
"STOP IT THIS INSTANT!" Jazii-the-human screamed. Atemu cringed and nodded meekly.
"I'm sorry. I won't do it again."
Jazii looked warily at him. "I never knew you were a mage."
"I'm not." Atemu sighed. "I have no idea why this is happening – wait." He frowned. "Actually, I might."
Atemu sat down heavily, motioning for Jazii to join him. "You know the Illusionist Soul guy?" He asked.
Jazii nodded. "What does that have to do with anything?"
"Well..." Atemu took a deep breath. "It's me."
"You've got to be joking." Jazii said flatly. "I'm not! It's true. The god Set told me when I was in the Egyptian underworld."
Jazii glared at him. "Show me the inside of your left wrist."
"Why?"
"Because, idiot, if you are the Illusionist Soul, which I highly doubt, then you will have the mark of an icicle and an eye there."
"You mean this?" Atemu rolled up his sleeve. "I just thought it was a birthmark, but –"
He noticed Jazii had fallen silent, her mouth open in shock. "The mark of the Illusionist Soul." Jazii whispered.
"I can't believe it. You really are the Illusionist Soul, and an ex-Pharaoh. I'm so sorry I doubted you." She knelt and lowered her eyes. "You are the true king."
"Pfft." Atemu frowned and stuck his tongue out. "Whatever. I had enough of this crap when I was at home. I don't need it from you." He helped Jazii to her feet and grinned.
"So why did I randomly think about you being a cow and then you turned into one?"
Jazii glared at him. "Well apart from it being very rude, I'm guessing that your powers are surfacing now you're older and kind of more mature." She wrinkled her nose. "Though I doubt that."
Atemu huffed. "You're so cruel. You should respect me, for I am mighty!" He gave Jazii his best I-am-holier-than-thou look. She snorted.
"You're pathetic! But I bet that if you can't control your own energy the results could and will be very destructive. So I guess we need to find you a teacher."
"A teacher?!" Atemu exclaimed indignantly. "I need no teacher! Nothing anyone can teach me would be of use because I am already perfect in every way!"
A dusty gust of wind tickled his nose. He sneezed, which in turn changed Bennu from a beautiful phoenix into the majestic, amazing, and all-powerful – mole rat?
Jazii crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. "See what I mean?"
Atemu glared. "Fine. I'll get a teacher to help me contain my magic. But I'm NOT happy about it!"
Jazii smirked. "Good."
Okay peeps this is REEEALLLY important so listen up!
I need you to list your favourite animes other than YGO from 1-5, ranking them from most to least. This is important so I want ALL of you to answer it! ALL! This is mine:
1: Orphen
2: Trigun
3: Ah! Megami-sama
4: Gasaraki
5: Astro Boy
Also, has anyone seen Series Zero eps of YGO? And know where I can find them apart from Lamba's site?
