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A/N: I bet you're looking for an explanation as to why it took so damn long for me to get this thing uploaded. The truth is…I needed a break from writing this story. I was almost getting burnt on it. My friend (the one who has suicidal thoughts) has really been scaring me lately. She started cutting (or at least scratching deeply) into her shoulders, wrists, and thighs and SHE WON'T HEAR ME! I have another friend who has the same trouble but she listens to what I have to say. I've been feeling useless, and that was getting me into some very bad places recently, places I'm not proud of (like my ankles). So, I decided that I needed some time away from writing stories, and I focused more on my poetry, one of my more productive outlets. Safe to say, I've written plenty. I've also been reading more fanfics to escape my reality, especially crossovers. Now, I'm also starting on a crossover story for myself (IY and Yu Yu Hakusho), which won't come out until I'm almost done with this story.

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I REALLY appreciate the support that your reviews have helped to give me. They've kept me going even when I was losing myself.

Sadly, I can't post my reviews to the reviews like I would like to. But to those who did review, just know that I loved them very much.

Disclaimer: This is getting redundant. But, I will say that I do not own Korn's "Thoughtless" or Evanescence's "October", which are the featured songs in this chapter. I also want to say sorry for what happened with the mind link stuff with Kagome and having trouble with symbols).

!Muted Words!

§Home Movies§

Sunday-

"Thumbing through the pages of my fantasies
Pushing all the mercy down, down, down
I wanna see you try to take a swing at me
Come on, gonna put you on the ground, ground, ground"

Kagome scrubbed at the main bathroom's shower singing one of her favorite songs. Kouga was sitting on the lip of the industrial sized bathtub, playing the song on his special seven-string guitar (as that's the kind of guitar the band uses).

Kagome had her hair pulled back in a high ponytail, wearing her grubby yet satisfyingly comfortable gray shirt and white cotton caprees. She sprayed the cleaner over the glass doors, then took her rag and wiped, removing any traces of use.

"Why are you trying to make fun of me?
You think it's funny?
What the fuck you think it's doing to me?
You take your turn lashing out at me
I want you crying with your dirty ass in front of me"

It's been a wonderful, beautiful month since Kagome visited Akira, and a wonderful, beautiful month of amazing sleep. The nightmares of over a year before have abandoned her subconscious, letting all the other dreams come to her. Of course, she still had her own bad dreams, but she has come to deal with the fact that she may never beat that monkey at checkers.

"All of my hate cannot be bound
I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming
So you can try to tear me down
Beat me to the ground
I will see you screaming"

Relationships have progressed with a rejuvenated vigor. Why, it was just last week that Kagome came home to find her dear older sister in full make-out mode with Miroku. It was probably the first time that she had seen Sango let her perverted boyfriend grab her ass (though she was willing to bet that it wasn't the first time that it had been done).

Kouga and Ayame went on a steady stream of dates, often going to Miroku's club to dance and grind to their (horny) hearts' content. Sometimes they would go to the bowling alley and throw a few games and pig out on the wonder of curly fries.

Rin and Sess always kept their relationship somewhat private. Not to say that people didn't know that they were taken, because they did (the men were reminded with every cold glare sent their way when they looked at Rin in some way that only protective boyfriends could see), it's just that they kept it to handholding and quick kisses when people were around. This made it very surprising when they came home early one night because they were kicked out of the movie theater because of 'inappropriate conduct while watching the movies'.

Kagome still chuckled at that sometimes.

"Thumbing through the pages of my fantasies
I'm above you, smiling at you, drown, drown, drown
I wanna kill and rape you the way you raped me
And I'll pull the trigger
And you're down, down, down"

Once InuYasha recovered completely, and her arm was free from bruises, the two took great advantage of pain-free mobility. They went out and did some of the stupid things that made being in a relationship fun and thrilling. For example, when the snow first fell thick enough to pack, they participated in a rather enjoyable snowball war and then an even more enjoyable sitting in front of the television in the dark, watching an old horror movie. Kagome pretended to be frightened and InuYasha, knowing this, feigned fear as well and said things that pretty much could be summarized as "screw you, I'm running", which earned him a playful wallop on the head and led to them neglecting the far-from-horrifying horror flick in favor of each other.

That was a decidedly good night for the both of them.

"Why are you trying to make fun of me?
You think it's funny?
What the fuck you think it's doing to me?
You take your turn lashing out at me
I want you crying with your dirty ass in front of me

All of my hate cannot be bound
I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming
So you can try to tear me down
Beat me to the ground
I will see you screaming"

Kagome watched as Kouga observed her moving from the shower stall to the sink before looking back at his guitar. She couldn't blame him, really. It was winter, November passing less than a weak ago, and winter wasn't her best time of the year. She was fairly more prone to breathing attacks in the frigid, fierce weather and she had yet to have more than one. Everyone was preparing for when it would happen, knowing that it probably would take its wrath on her more vindictively than normal. It was to be seen as the student that was told to do a big project that a teacher gives a month to be done, and he waits until the last three days before remembering that there was something to be worked on. The panic of his laziness attacks him and he succumbs to it.

Though everybody was going about their usual routine, they were unconsciously taking note of how Kagome was fairing, worrying and wondering who would or wouldn't be there to help her.

"All my friends are gone, they died (gonna take you down)
They all screamed, and cried (gonna take you down)

Never forget, never forget, never forget why we hate the world
(Gonna take you down)

Never forget, never forget, never forget why we hate the world
(Gonna take you down)

Never forget, never forget, never forget why we hate the world
(Gonna take you down)

Never forget, never forget, never forget why we hate the world
(Gonna take you down)"

It was sort of endearing in a way, to know that so many people cared for her well-being and weren't just her family. On the other hand, it sometimes got annoying to know that they were all waiting for her to drop faint like some over-dramatic actress. She almost sighed; it was going to be a long day.

"All of my hate cannot be bound
I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming
So you can try to tear me down
Beat me to the ground I will see you screaming

All of my hate cannot be bound
I will not be drowned by your thoughtless scheming
So you can try to tear me down
Beat me to the ground I will see you screaming"

§

Monday-

Kagome sat down in her usual seat as Miss Sora began to explain the next assignment. Honestly, one would be led to believe that this teacher was utterly fascinated with projects considering how many she made them do.

"All right, guys. As you know from the story is usually related to the topic of the project. Our next reading will focus around remembrance and flashbacks. So, as can be surmised, that is the basis of your next assignment. I want you to take an old picture or home movie and write a bit of a memoir of it. It needs to be at least two pages, typed, double-spaced, and you need to bring in the picture or movie that it came from so we get a chance to see it." Miss Sora paused, looking at the two families before adding playfully, "And make sure your stories are different, family members."

Kagome frowned: there weren't exactly a bunch of memories that she wanted to have to show to the class, and she was fairly sure none of the other Higurashis wanted to either.

"Okay then," Miss Sora continued, blissfully ignorant to Kagome's inner struggle, "I have a bit of a headache this morning so just work quietly on your projects for the rest of the period. Much appreciated."

''This project sounds like a ton of fun, eh 'Gome?>> Sango asked through their link, sarcasm threaded smoothly into the tone.

''Of course,>> Kagome replied, fiddling with her pen, her inner voice just as sardonic. ''I mean, who wouldn't love to talk about a memory…or the emotions attached to it?>> She turned to see InuYasha sleeping with his eyes open, Miroku's signature 'I am too paying attention!' resting technique. ''Your boyfriend is a bad influence on mine,>> she told her sister, still staring at the part albino.

Sango turned to look at InuYasha before shifting her eyes to her pervert, only to find him doing the same. ''At least Yash isn't groping you…in public. Think that they're having a contest?>> she pondered, referring to the mutual trance the two men were in.

Kagome glanced at Miroku but quickly turned her head in towards the opposite shoulder to muffle a giggle that was begging to be released to the outside world. She heard Sango snigger in the link. ''Want a bet?>> Kagome asked.

''On what?>> came her older sister's curious reply.

''When we have to wake them up, which one is going to jump higher in the air? My vote's on Inu here. I got the perfect way to wake him up.>> She turned to look at Sango, who nodded and mouthed the words "twenty dollars".

§

He felt a soft, wet warmth trail the shell of his ear before it met a contrasting blow of cool wind. He shivered slightly, feeling the heat created by the warmth leave his ear to travel down his chest and settle in the pit of his hips, causing a pleasurable rush of blood to flow through his loins. Warm, ghosting fingertips slid down his upper arms, reaching to his elbows before following their path back up to his shoulders. Up and down, so slowly. A heated coil grew in his lower abdomen.

That warmth from his ear returned, sucking teasingly on the lobe, moving away as that cool wind blew again, effectively tightening the coil. It moved from his ear to the hinge of his jaw, teasing the sensitive skin as the coil tautened. His pants became too confining for his comfort. It sauntered itself to his neck, teasing his jugular in a way he could only hope to wish it were teasing a different part of his anatomy. It sucked gently on the delicate flesh, starting the chain of pleasurable ripples. He couldn't stop the small moan that escaped his lips, the coil reaching an almost burning peak when—

BAM!

"Ahh!" InuYasha shouted at the horribly loud sound of a heavy textbook colliding to the ground. His eyes were wide and his breathing hard, he looked around the room for any signs of danger until he felt warm, familiar arms wrap around his shoulders.

"Relax, Inu," Kagome's voice came to him, soothing him into his chair. "I just needed to wake you up for Science, we only have four more minutes to get there. Almost everyone else is gone already," she whispered gently in his ear, causing him to shiver involuntarily and finally recognize the blooming hard-on he was sporting.

He dimly noticed Kagome turn towards Sango and ask, "How was your luck with waking Miroku?" He groaned mentally at the prospect that there were two more people to see him in this condition.

"About the same as you, but," and than Sango added in an undertone, "unfortunately," before returning to her normal level, "he didn't seem to jump as high as Yash there. Come on, we'll be late." They both exited the room—Sango, for some reason, slipping Kagome twenty bucks—, leaving the two men still in their seats for a few seconds and coming back in, standing in the doorway, Sango leaning in past her sister like in the movies when people are looking around the corner.

"What's the matter guys?" Sango asked, looking at them with a raised brow.

Kagome smirked a bit before adding in a playful tone, "Feeling stiff?" Without waiting, as if knowing that they weren't getting an answer, they left the room and flew through the hall.

InuYasha turned to look at Miroku as the other man did the same before turning the other way, a slight blush on their cheeks. Not looking at each other, the two followed their girlfriends, thanking the Powers that Be that their pants were just baggy enough.

§

The sun sank early behind the horizon long ago, hiding itself from the bitter winter air as if it were afraid of the chill it would never feel. Its cowardly retreat inked the city into darkness until it had enough sense to turn on the manmade lights for the traditional occasion, and left the citizens to deal with the frigid winds on their own mortal strength until they reached the comforting shelter of their home or, for some who had no such convenience, seek asylum in the debris of the alleyway.

For one woman, who had the benefit of insulated walls, though, there was no freedom from her mental winter as her eyes passed over the stream of images coming from the television in the living room. Her teacher wanted a memoir. Did that teacher know how painful it was to visit these home movies, even in the comfort of her own home? Did that teacher know that the Novocain of time was lifting because of her assignment, due in three days?

Kagome sighed. There was nothing that she could do about the project. She couldn't stop it, even though she was terribly reluctant to start. It was almost midnight, a thick falling of snow blew outside. The school administrator already had school closed for tomorrow, damning a day for learning and yet making the students feel an insurmountable joy.

Well, most students anyway.

Kagome watched as her younger self, at the age of ten, struggled to open her Christmas present. The Chemotherapy had left her so weak, as, back then, it always had for the months of treatment she had endured since the leukemia was discovered and diagnosed. Her bald head wore a thick, fluffy, warm hat to help fight away the chill that wasn't lost to the heating.

She sat on her father's lap, smiling at him and asking him quietly to help open the package old Saint Nick had left for her. Smiling as well, he took her hands and, with his added strength, pulled at the tape binding the small box, revealing that, underneath the holly wrapping paper, there was a velvety necklace box, which he helped her open as well.

Inside, an amazing, vintage silver locket in the shape of a blossoming rose lay, with small rubies coloring the petals. Inside the locket, on one side, there was a little picture of her mother and father holding hands as they watched the sunset at their senior prom, the night that the man proposed to the woman he crashed in love for. The other side was empty.

In the movie, she asked her father just why it was so. He, in his soft, deep voice, answered:

"My dear girl, this side is for you and the man you fall in love with. You take your picture with him and put it in on this side of the locket, so you can carry the love you share in here as well as in your heart."

§

Sango knew that her sister wasn't sleeping the instant she awoke in her room. Sighing, she pulled on some underwear, sweatpants, and a comfy tee before pulling on her thick, pink robe with the coffee cup embroidered over the left lapel, leaving it untied. She headed downstairs to where she felt her sister sitting in inner turmoil.

One of the old home movies was playing a Christmas memory. Sango remembered it well enough. It was Souta's second Merry holiday and, after he got all the teddy bears he wanted, he started digging through her stocking in search of something new. Oh, the good old days.

''Forsaking sleep, sweetie?>> Kagome looked up into her eyes, a curiously concerned maroon staring at the slightly pained cerulean.

''Just…trying to find something to write about for the Lit project,>> she answered, looking at the ground, to the screen, and back to the ground again.

''Really now? Taking advantage of the snow day tomorrow then?>> Sango watched as her sister smiled sadly from the doorway to the room.

''Yeah, don't want to put it off too much, ne?>> Kagome averted her eyes again.

Sighing with empathy, Sango sat next to her sister on the couch and pulled her into a hug. ''Is this the one that you want to do?>> She felt Kagome shake her head.

''This memory is much too…wounding…to me. Besides, I don't want to bring this tape in. The purpose of my locket is for very few to know. Even InuYasha doesn't know everything, like why one side is empty. He knows that is one of the most important things in the world to me, but he thinks that it's just because it has a picture of my parents in it. And since the locket is always under my shirt, hardly anyone even knows that it's there. I want to keep it that way. This locket is just too personal for that.>> Sango nodded in agreement.

''So what are you going to do?>> she wondered. Kagome leaned her entire weight against her, forcing them to recline against the couch's arm, pulling down a blanket to cover them.

''I was actually thinking of doing…Papa's funeral…>> The mental voice drifted off.

''Why?>>

''Well, for one, it's a photo, which only tells as much as one looks for the answers. And second, it's something that can't damage me as much emotionally as the locket. I know that he's dead, I've accepted it and I can live on from it. But the locket is something that he meant to be so special. I can't do that…I can't do that to him.>>

Sango nodded in understanding. Kagome just wanted to keep something that she knows, a secret, the last thing that she had to her father. But his funeral, it was in the papers, it was in the news, and the way he died…

Sometimes it hurts to know that your big, strong daddy became a statistic because of someone else's stupidity.

Sango stroked Kagome's onyx hair to soothe her into a sleepy state while turning off the tape and switching to some late night sitcom. Their lives were so perfect and slightly funny at the same time…

§

Tuesday-

Rin awoke with a yawn, snuggling down into the warmth of the duvet cover before opening bleary, chocolate eyes to the world of her room. Her lavender walls greeted her dimly, the snowfall blocking out much of the natural sunlight that usually filtered through her windows. With a grim smile, she pulled back the cozy eiderdown and faced the slight chill of the brisk morning. She stumbled to the closet while rubbing the sleep from her eyes, walking in and pulling on some underwear, violet sweatpants, and a black, thermal, long-sleeved shirt.

She headed own the stairs to get her morning coffee, only to hear the sounds of the television. She walked into the living room and smiled a little. Kagome was asleep on top of Sango, who had her in a loose embrace. It was brought back a bit of nostalgia to Rin. When they were younger, the twins would almost always sleep like that: Sango protecting Kagome from the monsters that the night brought.

She moved to the kitchen and set the water to boil, grabbing a large mug and a Green Tea bag. When her morning pick-me-up finished brewing, she returned to the living room to see Sango awake and discreetly trying to slide from under her sister without waking her up

"Having trouble?" Rin couldn't help but ask, mirth gleaming in her eyes. She received a glare from the brunette on the couch.

"Stop laughing, Rin. I can hear it in your eyes," Sango explained in a hushed tone, still shifting. "Damn," she cursed, "I can't feel my left butt cheek." Even while biting her lip, Rin let a giggle escape her, bringing about another glare in her direction.

Kagome shifted off of her sister groggily. "Now shut up and let me sleep," she grumbled, pulling the quilt from last night over herself to fall back asleep.

"Not so fast, 'Gome. Other people need to use the couch, too. Go to bed," Rin mock chastised, taking a sip from her tea. She watched in amusement as Kagome pouted before slowly sliding off the sofa. "Good girl."

Kagome groused obscenities all the way up the stairs.

Rin sighed and shook her head, a smirk set on her lips. "She's been around InuYasha too much," she diagnosed. Sango only nodded as she went to make herself some tea as well.

§

"Mama?" a small voice asked from behind her. Kagome turned to see Shippou, his auburn hair out of his usual ponytail and slightly tangled on his head.

"Yes, Shippou?" She kneeled down and hugged her son.

"Are you going to bed?" he asked quietly. Kagome nodded. "Can I go with you? I'm still tired." Again, Kagome nodded, opening her bedroom door.

Pulling back the duvet cover, Kagome crawled in, Shippou following and snuggling to her chest. She covered them again and they fell into a pleasant slumber.

§

Rin watched the home movie that was in the VCR, smiling sadly at how close and complete they felt then. Standing, she changed the tape to another one labeled 'Big Someday'.

An image of a fourteen-year-old Kagome with her trusty electric guitar and a three-months-older Kouga with his favorite bass showed itself on the screen. This was before she and Sango joined the group, when it was just those two. Her mother's voice came from behind the camera.

"Are you kids ready?" it asked them. They chorused a yes. "Then start playing!" she encouraged.

Kouga tapped out the tempo with his foot, Kagome joining him for the next count before starting to pick the opening to their song. A few seconds into it Kagome began to sing:

"I can't run anymore,
I fall before you,
Here I am,
I have nothing left,
Though I've tried to forget,
You're all that I am,
Take me home,
I'm through fighting it,
Broken,
Lifeless,
I give up,
You're my only strength,
Without you,
I can't go on,
Anymore,
Ever again."

The chorus came up and Kagome began to strum out chords and Kouga sang softly in the background a part that was later given to Sango when she joined the band.

"My only hope,
(All the times I've tried)
My only peace,
(To walk away from you)
My only joy,
My only strength,
(I fall into your abounding grace)
My only power,
My only life,
(And love is where I am)
My only love."

Kagome went back to strumming the same melody as the first verse.

"I can't run anymore,
I give myself to you,
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry,
In all my bitterness,
I ignored,
All that's real and true,
All I need is you,
When night falls on me,
I'll not close my eyes,
I'm too alive,
And you're too strong,
I can't lie anymore,
I fall down before you,
I'm sorry,
I'm sorry."

The chorus started again.

"My only hope,
(All the times I've tried)
My only peace,
(To walk away from you)
My only joy,
My only strength,
(I fall into your abounding grace)
My only power,
My only life,
(And love is where I am)
My only love."

Suddenly, the music took on a more emotional appeal to it, almost causing the soul itself to swell.

"Constantly ignoring,
The pain consuming me,
But this time it's cut too deep,
I'll never stray again."

The emotion carried to an even more magnificent height as Kagome and Kouga belted out the last two choruses.

"My only hope,
(All the times I've tried)
My only peace,
(To walk away from you)
My only joy,
My only strength,
(I fall into your abounding grace)
My only power,
My only life,
(And love is where I am)
My only love.

"My only hope,
(All the times I've tried)
My only peace,
(To walk away from you)
My only joy,
My only strength,
(I fall into your abounding grace)
My only power,
My only life,
(And love is where I am)
My only love."

The song ended and the sounds of people behind the camera clapping started up as Kouga and Kagome took a small bow, both blushing slightly.

Rin remembered that scene so well, watching of how fluid their fingers seemed as they played their instruments. In fact, this was the song that got her into Faded in the first place. Sighing wistfully, Rin stopped the tape and headed to her room.

She had a memoir to write.

§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§

A/N: Again, I'm sorry that I couldn't give you the review replies, but please, please, know how much I really appreciate them. Review, if only because you want the next chapter sooner.