The Cure for the Common Man

Summary: I saw Hitch the other night, and I thought that maybe if Luke had talked to someone like Hitch, then he and Lorelai would have gotten together faster. I know it's probably really out of character for Luke to do that, but it's kind of like the self-help books. So, this is sort of a Gilmore Girls-Hitch crossover. This will take place before the first season. Rachel never came back, and neither did the moron, more commonly known as Chris. I just wanted to put some JavaJunkie fluff out there, in light of recent angst-filled episodes.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 1

"Hey Buddy," Luke said as he walked into Sniffy's Tavern.

"Hey Lucas, how ya doin'?" Buddy asked. He knew Luke had been pretty down recently. Buddy could only assume that it had something to do with the woman Luke had been hung up on for the past three years.

"I've been doing pretty good. How about you?"

"I'm good. Now, why don't you tell me about her and what's really going on?"

"Her who?"

"The woman who's obviously occupying your every thought?"

"How can you tell?"

"I had the same distant look on my face before I worked up the courage to talk to Maisy."

"It's just Lorelai. I've told you about her before. It's just that every time I see her I want to ask her out, but something always stops me."

"An old friend of mine in New York, well his son had the same problem with this one woman, except he'd never talked to her. He talked to this man they call the "date doctor," and now they're married. I'm gonna talk to my friend and see if I can get the good doctor's number."

"No, Buddy, I don't need to talk to a comple stranger to get help. She's not interested anyway. I can tell."

"You'll never know until you try. Just humor me. Talk to the man, see if he can help you, maybe he can."

"Fine. I'll do it."

A couple days later, Buddy walked into the diner.

"Hey Buddy. What are you doing here?" Luke asked, genuinely confused. Buddy never came to Stars Hollow.

"I brought you the doctor's number. Just call him. Please." Buddy said, practically begging Luke.

"Okay. He can't help me though."

"Just try him. He's apparently a miracle worker."

That night, after closing, Luke dialed the number on the card.

"Yes. How can I help you?" a voice answered.

"I'm looking for the date doctor. I need help." Luke said.

"I don't recognize your number as a New York number. Where are you calling from?"

"Stars Hollow, Connecticut."

"How did you hear about my services?"

"One of the men you worked with is the son of a friend of a friend."

"I don't leave the city, normally. However, I'll make an exception this time. I can hear it in your voice that you're getting desperate. Have you ever been to Sniffy's Tavern?"

"Yeah. All the time. How do you know where it is?"

"Just because I don't leave the city for work, doesn't mean I never leave the city. Meet me there Thursday afternoon at 2. Sit in a booth, and I'll find you. What's your name?"

"Luke Danes. I'll be there."

Thursday afternoon at 1:55, Luke was sitting in a booth at Sniffy's, just as he'd been told to. All of a sudden, a tall, black man sat down in front of him.

"Luke, I assume," he said.

"Yes. And your name is…?" Luke said.

"That's not important right now. So, tell me about her."

"Her name is Lorelai. She runs an inn in my town. She's thirty years old and has a thirteen-year-old daughter. She ran away from her home when she was seventeen with Rory, that's her daughter. She started as a maid at the Independence Inn, and now she runs the place. Her parents are really rich and pretty much haven't had contact with her since. Her daughter is the sweetest girl in the world. They're really close, more like sisters than mother and daughter. She lights up every room she walks into, her laughter is infectious, and she's my best friend. I've been in love with her from the moment I met her three years ago."

"My name's Alex Hitchens. I'm here to help you. Now, my job will be a lot easier than most cases. You've had contact with her and know her very well. I'm going to help you sweep Lorelai off her feet in three dates. After that, you're on your own. First off, asking her out. How do you normally ask women out?"

"I haven't asked anyone out for years."

"Okay, since this woman is your friend, you don't necessarily want to make it seem like you're asking her out on a date. Ask her to go to a movie, have her bring her daughter along. If Lorelai gets up to go to the bathroom and the date is going well, ask Rory if it's okay with her if you have another date with her mom. In the case of most single moms, their kid's opinion of the man is just as important as their own. Rory knows you and I'm assuming is comfortable around you. How often do you see Lorelai?"

"Sometimes three times a day. I run a diner and she comes in for her daily dose of black death."

"Black death? What sort of diner is it?"

"Black death is what I call coffee."

"Okay. Tomorrow, when you see her, ask her to go to a movie on Saturday. If she has plans, ask her for next Saturday. Call me around noon if you've asked her. We'll take it from there."

"All right. Thanks."

The next day, about nine o'clock, Lorelai came into the diner and collapsed at the counter.

"Coffee," Lorelai moaned. "Need it now, please."

"Are you okay," Luke asked as he reached for the coffeepot to pour her a cup.

"Early meeting. Woke up late. No time to make coffee. Sookie was out. She didn't make the coffee. Need the coffee," Lorelai said, half asleep. "Aw, that's good coffee," she said, taking a sip.

"Beginning of a long day, huh?"

"You have no idea. It's not even close to noon. I can't wait for the weekend. I can sleep. It's been such a long week."

"Hey, if you're not doing anything tomorrow night, why don't I take you and Rory to a movie? I mean, you sound like you could use a night out. And they're showing Casablanca over at the bookstore, and I thought maybe you'd like to go," Luke said, slowly losing confidence as he looked at Lorelai's bewildered face.

"Are you asking me out on a date?"

"No, not a date persay. I just thought we could go as friends to a movie, with Rory of course. I mean, if you wanted to think of it as a date, I could live with that. But if you don't want to, then it's just a movie."

"You're asking me out. And babbling, I've never seen you babble. Rant yes, babble never. This is a nice change of pace," Lorelai said, slowly torchering Luke.

"What's your answer?" Luke asked, slowly losing patience.

"I'd love to go, and I suppose we could think of it as a date, if you want to," Lorelai replied, with a smile on her face.

"Okay, it starts at eight o'clock. Do you want to meet here and walk over together?"

"Sure. And Luke," Lorelai said as she got up to leave.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for including Rory."

"No problem."

At noon, as promised, Luke called Hitch to tell him the good news.

"So, how'd it go, man?" Hitch asked.

"It started out a little rocky. But it went great."

"Rocky how?"

"I was pretty much babbling and she was sitting there enjoying every minute of it. But she said yes. And tomorrow night, the three of us are going to see Casablanca at this bookstore in town."

"Perfect. Are you picking them up, meeting them there, what?"

"We're meeting at the diner and walking over together."

"Great. Did you make it sound like a date or just hanging out?"

"She was having a hard week, so I asked if she wanted a night out with a friend. She asked me if I meant as a date, and I said if she wanted to think of it as a date, I wouldn't be objected to it. So, she said she wanted to think of it as a date."

"That is very good. If she wants to think of it as a date, then she's clearly interested in dating you. Now, just dress casually, be a gentleman, and try to corner her daughter. Ask her if she's okay with you dating her mom, it'll make you seem like you want this to be something serious and not just a fling, plus it'll make you look like a caring, compassionate guy. With single moms, you have to win over the kid. Got it?"

"Yeah. Thanks Hitch."

"Call me Sunday afternoon, same time as today. We'll go from there.

AN2: I'm not used to writing romance stuff, just father-daughter fluff. So, please read and review. I'll be able to update a lot more next week, cuz it's spring break! And if you read He Didn't Have to Be, I just updated it and I'll be updating it next week too.