Hello people! This is my first Hellsing fanfic, and the first fanfic I've written in 5 years! Be nice, and please offer constructive criticisms! I would like to thank my beta, Spookychild for helping me out. Go check out her fics now, and die from lack of breath due to laughter! Just don't stalk her, she doesn't appreciate that.

WARNING: This contains shonen ai, though it's so slight that a less intelligent being wouldn't even notice it. The pairing is Walter x Alucard, and yes I know Walter is old, but Alucard is older than and along with, is a vampire and is seperated from humanity's vanity.

"Hotel Conversations"

A cracked ceiling accompanied with cheap paint loomed above; the luminescence of the TV set flashing against it, its light pounding the darkness that attempted to invade. The moldy green carpet smelled of tobacco like everything else in the cramped room. The lonesome, queen bed, in the middle of the room, sagged and creaked under pressure and it gladly showed off the fact that it was the anti-thesis of a Tempur-Pedic mattress. You can feel every movement your partner made, and it was rather annoying since said partner was a vampire and was supposed to be awake at night according to his biological clock (if an undead creature had one that it). Sleeping (for Walter) was a lesson in futility, and he surrendered to insomnia (or rather the blinking of the TV that Alucard insisted on watching).

Nose crinkling at the stench of stale tobacco and at the burning sensation he received whenever he rubbed his back against the cheap polyester material of the bed cover (he was sitting on the floor, directly in front of the TV, with his back to the foot of the bed), Walter felt a surge of disgust within his chest. The only stately thing in this entire room was the vampire lying on his stomach in the middle of the bed.

"Alucard?"

The murmuring of the television lowered as Alucard decreased the volume.

"Yes?"

"Is this the best that backwater Ireland can offer?"

"No."

"Than why did Integra get us this room then? Isn't she extremely wealthy?"

"She's cheap."

"Okay, I was just checking if I was the only one thinking the same thing…in a more negative way on my part of course."

"I'm not complaining, it has warm water and a TV. What more do you want? We've been through worse."

"I don't think comparing our current accommodations to a shack we took shelter in during a rain storm in when we had no choice is accurate or proper. Integra could have easily gotten something better than this…Is it that painful to her pocketbook to get us accommodations that don't have wildlife?"

"True, true…but aren't I the one that usually complains about Integra? My, my Walter, you've changed…"

"Oh shush!"

"Oh, and if your complaining about wildlife, then why are you sitting on the floor?"

"I like to be able to see and identify my enemy, unlike the bed…where the enemy is concealed…Guerilla warfare is quite nasty I tell you. Anyway, with the way that bed is…it'll kill my back."

A chuckle erupted from Alucard's chest, rumbling the bed.

" Since when did you speak in military terms?"

"Since you started watching those god awful American World War II propaganda movies starring John Wayne."

Some more laughter, accompanied with the vibrating of the mattress. "True."

The silence caused by the lack of voices was soon replaced by the boisterous noises of the hotel's TV. It was a comfortable dull moment, temporarily letting Walter forget the dangers of the hotel room's wild life and his dedication to insomnia. Walter, slowing falling into sleep, had failed to make notes of the shifting of weight on the mattress, and was fairly surprised when the lilting, Irish tones of Channel 10's news reporter were replaced with Alucard's rich alto.

"Walter?"

"Yes?"

Weight shifted on the bedspread as Alucard stretched on the bed. "What type of teenage stereotype would you be?"

"What started this?"

"I was watching MTV, trying to see if I can really rot my brain like those Anti-Music Christian fundamentalist interest groups tell me it's going to...but really, it's just like reading Dickens"

"What do you have against Dickens?"

"Nothing really...just makes my brain lethargic"

"You're 600 years old...I'm sure you can think of something better to compare MTV to."

"Why are you getting so defensive about this?"

Another weight shift as Alucard turned to Walter whose head was resting against the foot of the bed as he sat on the floor, staring blankly into the television screen. "He's my favorite author, that's why...His work did a lot for the British during the Industrial Revolution."

"Walter, I lived through it...You humans give him too much credit...Now, back to the original question: What modern day teenage stereotype would you be or consider myself to be?"

"What are my choices?" Another shift in pressure as Walter turned to face Alucard whose face was illuminated by the flashes of the cheap hotel TV.

"From what MTV has led me to believe there are preppy, ghetto, punk, goth, nerd, and geek to choose from...but then again, from what I've heard at those gothic clubs I have to visit frequently...you know, to clear out the junk vampires who think it's another one of those RPG games...Vampire the Masquerade, is it? How very inaccurate... Anyway, I heard MTV was inaccurate, but those are the choices...Choose wisely Walter, your fate hangs in the balance..." Alucard crooned, lifting his head (still placed in his hand) to properly look down upon Walter.

"Oh you!" Walter swatted him playfully, but due to disadvantageous sitting/lying positions they both decided to assume, the hand didn't get close to Alucard's face, but was caught by his gloved hand.

"Walter, I thought you lessened your violent tendencies over the years. I'm glad to see my Angel of Death is still reliable! But...now answer the question."

A sigh is heard, along with a rustle of clothing and flesh as Walter slid his hand out of Alucard's and place it back to his side. "Well...from what I know, and basing this on the fact that when I was a teenager I had long black hair, was entitled the Angel of Death, had a terrible homicidal streak, and my only friend was a misanthropic vampire...I'd say I would be one of those horrible little junk vampires you have to catch at those nightclubs." Walter said, chuckling, while trying to redirect his attention to the now strobe like TV screen (the sun had set, and the room had darkened), trying to forget the warmth in his hand.

"Hmm...interesting...I would have put you in the geek category for your horrible affection towards comic books and literature in general, but alas, I am so used to murderous teenagers that I don't consider it a defining characteristic." Alucard snorted, as he inspected the TV controller with his other (warm, hand catching) hand.
"Well, if a love of books is a defining characteristic...then you are a geek too! What type of formidable vampire reads Little Women?"

Alucard, affronted, dropped the TV controller "I was bored! Just as I was when I decided to watch MTV, and just as I was when I read Dickens!"

"Are you bored now? Talking about Little Women, MTV, and Dickens?" Walter asked, staring too intently at the incessantly blinking TV screen.

A pressure shift again, the foot of the bed dipped, and Alucard's face was alongside Walter's. "No, I'm not," another pressure shift, now against Walter's cheek, and a cool sliver of something left on weathered flesh. "I'm talking about them with you."

Another shift of weight on the bed followed another as Alucard got up from the bed and left the room, leaving Walter sitting alone, starring at the illuminating television a little too intently, with a warm hand tracing the wet remnant of a moment that could have, should have, and may have happened.

Much to Walter's confusion, the reflection of Alucard's face on the television screen showed a caring expression…

Maybe it was the light contrast that did it.