Inter-LOAFERS!
By Xenomorph666
Disclaimer: I own only Perfection and Wraith.
DigitalMan and K2 are © My close friend.
Everything else is copyrighted to their correct owner.
Universe: Misfit-Verse
AN: Ok so some requests, not a lot, but then again I only have on average 2 people reviewing my story. So this is to be expected.
Everybody was Kung Fu Fightin'!
As the bombs and lasers went off all around the Pit the Joes and Misfit's Scrambled to their usual positions and the X-Men joined them. The Scion's however took the attack very personally, especially CDM who through himself in front of a missile that was intended for Perfection, who in his endless ranting never noticed it. Wraith on the other hand was busy getting drunk with Polly and Eileen was busy generating a force field to protect herself and her child.
"NOT THE PASTRIES!" Perfection screamed as a COBRA BAT crashed into a table of exquisite foods. "NOT THE PIE!" Fred started to use some of the food as weapons against COBRA's ground troops.
"Calm down!" DM had changed back and was now trying to grab Perfection's attention, but it was already to late, he had gone into worried designer mode. "Wraith keep an eye on him." DM set his friend at Wraith's bar and walked away.
"Beer?" Wraith asked, Perfection simply took it and guzzled it down. "Coffee?" Wraith asked holding up a batch of coffee clearly marked "BA's Special Blend: DO NOT EXPERIMENT WITH!", Perfection haplessly guzzled it down. The entire thermos of it.
"WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOA!" Perfection yelled in excitement a few seconds later.
Meanwhile the battle was ragging fairly standard as COBRA was being beaten back by the combined forces of the X-Men, Misfits, Scion and HOMe and Vile. It was how they were being driven back though, that caused the Cobra Commander to question his current predicament.
His newest cloaking device had worked wonders at getting past Joe security, but it didn't seem to matter now as a giant robotic dinosaur was tearing through his tanks like Godzilla on holiday. Add in the fact that two odd bug like creatures had infiltrated the new Hover-Base and it was no wonder he was on the verge of fleeing right before his men, which really wouldn't have been anything new to them
"WHAT IS THAT THING?!" The commander hissed in annoyance as he watched the robot playfully toss three tanks into the air and bat them into the horizon with it's tail.
"I don't know, sir. Perhaps a new Joe defense." Destro suggested.
"No, I surmise it belongs to one of those energy beings we detected as it has it's own massive energy source." Dr. Mindbender said as he scanned a few consoles.
"What about those devices can they do their job?" The Commander asked, annoyed the dinosaur had just linked several tanks together and was now playing a jump rope game with them. "WHAT ARE THOSE?!" He screeched as he saw several smaller robot dinosaurs come onto the field, "And why are they pink?!"
"One can only guess." The Baroness said as she pointed to the name "Trinity" painted on each one, followed by an Alpha, Beta, and Gamma symbols.
"They let those maniacs have weapons of THAT DEGREE!?" Cobra Commander whined "And Fidel won't even sell me a nuclear war head…" He was pouting now.
"Sir, if we are going to launch the containment fields we should do it now." Destro said, a little amused at the antics of Trinity, setting up a small baseball game, using the tanks as bases and balls.
"Launch them then!" The Commander said with a hint of obnoxious glee.
The Baroness then pressed a button and the base started to shake as it opened up to reveal to the outside world it's most deadly weapon yet.
"… What… the … Fuck?!" DM said into his radio as the base opened up. He could hardly believe what he was seeing.
"They aren't, like serious, are they?" Kitty asked, confused by what she was seeing.
"I wouldn't put it past them." Pietro said in shock.
"But it makes no sense." Lance said.
"Well neither do our three guests." Hank pointed out.
"Um, guys exactly how powerful is this stuff?" Wraith asked as he showed up with the thermos of BA's coffee.
Althea grabbed it instantly and was about to ask him what he did with it when suddenly she noticed everyone was in Hawaiian drag. "You didn't?" She asked in terror, already knowing the answer.
"He was sad about the party being wrecked so…" He was interrupted when a COBRA missile slammed into his bar, "MY BAR!" He shrieked as he stood in shock at the sight.
"Me thinks that was a bad idea." Perfection said with a laugh as he saw Wraith's look go from shock to pure hatred.
"DIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!" Wraith shouted as he flung himself into the miniature war.
"Destory a man's beer and you face his wrath. Destroy Wraith's beer and you face death in a very bad mood." DM said over the radio.
"What fool would do that?" K2 chirped in.
"COBRA." Althea watched as the COBRA troops were ripped from their tanks and tossed aside like crazy.
"Um, shouldn't we be worried about him?" Toad asked pointing to Perfection who had replaced his eyes with plastic wobble eyes.
"No, I think he'll be fine so long as he doesn't go into battle." Althea said with a sigh. "You know, I just realized we have no more COBRA lackeys to kick around."
"Yeah." Wanda said looking around to see Perfection walk off towards the battle. "WAIT!" She yelled after him, her voice filled with more concern than she meant.
"Oh come on, my Scarlet Goddess What are they gonna do? Hit me with that giant frying pan of theirs?" Perfection said pointing to the worlds largest cast iron frying pan attached to a giant pair of arms, one holding a spatula.
"Why, yes." Cobra Commander said over a loud speaker as the pan came crashing down on Perfection's noggin.
The impact of the giant metal pan sent shockwaves through the ground so fast and so hard it disoriented everyone and sent K2 sprawling to the ground. The X-Men and Misfits were almost tossed into a wall, but Lance's quick thinking and manipulation of the tremors allowed for a softer landing. When they got up they saw something that made them all freeze. Everyone had expected Perfection to be on his feet sending some crazy remark back at the COBRAs instead he was unconscious and on the ground and COBRA wasted no time in using it to their advantage as they scooped him up into the pan with the spatula and then took off at speeds so high it surprised even DM.
After the initial shock of having his friend kidnapped passed DM was absolutely livid, and not even his wife's consoling could comfort him. His anger didn't help either as it was wreaking havoc on the Joe power systems making the plans for a rescue all the much harder. Especially since they not only had to rescue Perfection, but Vile and HOMe as well.
"All right DM we get it you're angry. We all are, it's not everyday COBRA gets their grubby little claws on a source of energy that powerful." Logan said with a grunt.
"You think that's why I'm angry. No I'm angry because they took a FRIEND of mine. Not an energy source. A FRIEND! LEARN THE FREAKING DEFINITION!" DM was yelling in Logan's face now and the power fluctuated to normal. "Ahhh, I needed that." He said as he calmed himself down.
"First things first." Hawk said as he spread a map out. "We need to know where they and where they're headed."
"No problem." DM said with a smile, "They have two ways of tracking them they don't even know about."
"Huh?" Scott and Althea both looked confused.
"Mortals. Leave it to them to let the obvious escape. HOMe and Vile, they give off vastly different energy signatures than any being in this world, we can follow that signature. Hell we can zap ourselves an a small army to it." Wraith said, obviously a little angry still. "I'm going to get some air. You can explain it to the flesh bags."
Outside Wraith had expected to find the remnants of the battle still scouring the landscape, and for the most part they were, but the thing that caught his attention was Wanda. She was standing by where the missile that hit Perfection was, she had an obviously disturbed look on her face.
"I-I-I should have been…" She couldn't even finish.
"Remember, he's almost everywhere at anytime, but even we have our limits. My guess is he teleported you and the statue away from him at the last second." Wraith said as he came up by her. "He's an odd one. No Scion, no person, hell nothing can control him and I'd hate to see the fool that would make him angry."
"What you aren't all powerful?" Wanda joked, but her pain was obvious.
"Oh, we have power beyond measure, infinite really, but we were all mortal once. We all have pains, weaknesses, strengths and hearts. Those are the reasons we are what we are."
"What was he like, before becoming a Scion?" Wanda asked looking at the melting pieces of the statue.
"Only one of us knows." Wraith said trying to avoid the question.
"What about his world?" She was picking a few burnt pieces of wood off the ground.
"Ravaged by constant war and fighting, torn by a cataclysm so great it tore his heart in two to see it happen." Wraith said, he was only being partly honest.
Wanda stopped then and let a tear come down her face. "Why does he care so much? About me, about my happiness."
Wraith sat down on a stool he brought over from the remains of his bar. "The first Scarlet Witch we had contact with, she absolutely agreed with Perfection's ideals: peace, understanding, love and a fair hand. But she was already married and she felt she was too old for someone as "young as him". So she told him if she were a little younger, he might have a chance. So you can see where that led to."
"Yeah, straight into my overly complex life." She grunted. "Does he even know anything about me? I mean it's completely insane to think he does."
"Do you even know him? Have you tried to understand him, his motives, his actions, his concerns?" Wraith asked, his only response was Wanda shaking her head "no". "Then maybe you should come out of that overbearingly obnoxious rock of a mask you wear and try to."
"I'm not changing the look." She said plainly.
Wraith only laughed. "What I mean is stop hiding from those you care about or could care about. Pain isn't the answer, take it from some one who knows." Wraith said rising above Wanda, a strange light enveloping him as he took her to a strange dimension.
"My world, my time. My story so you may learn." The Ghost's word's echoed in her head as she saw a light envelope her field of vision.
"What the hell was that?" Hawk said as he looked out the window. He felt a hand pull him back, it was DM simply holding his head low.
"As erratic and unpredictable as Perfection is, he is now match for Wraith's subtle deceptions and plays on the field. He does everything for a reason and I wouldn't be surprised if more than one person he comes into contact with has some sort of revelation before this is over." He said calmly as he went back to the table to continue planning Perfection's rescue.
"Why is that?" Hawk asked.
DM paused for a moment, then answered. "Fate, is no illusion. What it is, is a path you are most likely to take, unless something steers you away from it. But that rarely happens, it didn't happen to Wraith and he suffered for more than six-hundred years before he could accept it, and that's when he became who he is now. Free will is there, so is fate, and if you don't pay attention to your life you may just meet the fate no one wants." He never looked up as he explained, no matter how confused the Joe's, X-Men or Misfits got. He wanted his friend back and nothing would stop him from getting it.
"Ok." Vile stared at the Cobra Commander. "Let's try this again. Release Perfection and HOMe or Mr. I-like-to-play-with-genes will get some flying lessons, with out the wings."
Vile currently had on Dr. Mindbender at his mercy hanging out of one of the bases windows , while Cobra Commander had HOMe and Perfection held hostage with in a comically giant frying pan.
"Can he survive a fall from this height?" Cobra Commander whispered to Destro.
"No sir it's a twelve story drop from here." Destro said with a sigh.
"Ah, ok." The Commander turned back to Vile. "Vile was it? Yes well you see it doesn't quite matter if you drop him, we can always higher another one…"
"WHAT!" Dr. Mindbender screamed outside as a pigeon flew in his mouth.
"Quite! However, I do have another proposition for you." The Commander sat in his chair. "DIE!"
He quickly pressed a button, but as soon as he did he found Dr. Mindbender thrown into his lap and Vile positioned precariously above him with his speared tail pointing down.
"Destro, do something." He squeaked in terror.
"Oh I would sir, but you see I have the slight problem of dealing with his giant sized claw pinning me to the wall." Destro said sarcastically. "And so does the Baroness."
"Well now I think I have a lot more and a lot better bargaining chips, wouldn't you say?" Vile smiled down at the commander.
"Why can't I have the good fighters on my team anymore?" The Commander moaned as if he had the worst cold imaginable.
AN: Well, you like?
