Author's Note: Hi there, again! Lil here, again! Here's the second chapter for ya, hope you like it! Please review, and be nice!
Disclaimer: I own nothing, but I do have an old tape of the song Love Potion # 9, I love that song!
Love Potion Number 9
Chapter 2
When the disturbed Potions Master had gone all the way down to the dungeons, he dropped his friend unceremoniously on the ground and glared at him. "Well," he said to the now purple man sitting beside him, "you're a whole lot of help." Lupin, who could no longer contain his mirth, exploded with laughter.
"Shhhhh!", Snape snapped, unsuccessfully trying to silence Lupin, who was now rolling on the ground with tears in his eyes. "There could be some other strange person sneaking around down here, just waiting to pounce!" Lupin tried to calm himself down, so as not to be heard by any nefarious persons that may be plotting against the paranoid Potions Professor. "We have to be careful," Snape continued, "we don't know what crazy individual may be lurking around any corner!"
At this, a hand tapped Snape's shoulder, and he jumped into the air, shrieking like a little girl, only to hit his head on the rather low dungeon ceiling and come crashing to the ground. This sent Lupin, who had reduced himself to low chuckling, into wild peals of insane laughter again. Snape spun around, clutching his head in pain, to find, not a sinister assassin, but a rather startled-looking Hermione Granger. "Yes, Miss Granger?", he asked, trying to sound normal.
She looked at him as if he were mad (which is quite possible). "I was just wondering when we were going to get our last test back, Professor Snape, sir. I didn't mean to frighten you."
"I was not frightened!", he proclaimed in a threatening voice, "You merely surprised me, that's all." Both his colleague and his student looked at him doubtfully. He continued to Hermione, "You will get your tests back when I have decided to give them back! Now go away!" She turned around and walked off, a bit disturbed. "And ten pints from Gryffindor!", he called out.
"I don't know what's wrong with these people today!", Snape was telling Lupin , "It's like they're all under some mad sort of spell! Maybe they've been cursed!"
"I think maybe Madam Pomfrey could help us, maybe you've been cursed or something.", said Lupin.
"Me?", asked Snape, "I'm not the one acting like a raving lunatic!"
"Yes," agreed Lupin, "but maybe there is something wrong with you, like a spell put on you that makes everyone you meet go crazy or something. Maybe I'm not affected by it because werewolves are immune to most curses."
"Possibly," Snape said, "but highly unlikely. You were already insane to begin with, no spell required. Also, my Snapey-sense tells me that it is something farmore sinisterthan that." They had reached the hospital wing and had walked inside before Lupin had realize that he had just been insulted.
They decided to head to the hospital wing to get Madam Pomfrey's opinion on what could be wrong, hoping she would have some answers.
They walked into the room, anxious to see ifthe nursecould tell them what was wrong. She, after all, did have lots of experience in the strange happenings at Hogwarts. There were no ill or injured students to tend to, and she immediately hurried over to them to see what was wrong. "Oh, hello there, dears!", she said to them, "What seems to be the trouble?"
Snape and Lupin explained to her the strange events of the morning while she listened with curiosity. After their tale, Pomfrey suggested they go somewhere a little more private to discuss the problem, and, grabbing each man by the arm, ushered them into her office. "I think I know what may be the problem," she tells them, "But I don't know who did it or how to fix it."
She then pours them tea and offers them cookies before continuing, "With the way you describe people's reactions to you, it appears to be…" She leaned closer to them, apparently to whisper what it was that was ailing the poor Potions Professor. All of a sudden, she kissed Snape on the cheek and said, "Gee, you're cute!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!", the wizards screamed, and ran out of there like a tarantula out of a mud pit! Unfortunately at that time the bell rang to signal the end of breakfast. Students ran from the Great Hall out into the hallway, and so did the teachers who had still been finishing their meal. Try as they may, Snape and Lupin could not avoid bumping into several people as they escaped. However, when they saw two love-struck female professors, the pair stopped running and jumped behind a rather large and ugly potted plant.
After a few moments, the hallway grew quiet. The students were all gone, and so, presumably, were McGonagall and Sinistra. "Remus," Snape whispered, "check and see if the coast is clear!" The man cautiously did as he was told and peeked his head around to look down the corridor. Suddenly, a hand appeared out of nowhere and grabbed him by the hair, hauling him into the air!
The insane pair of women had apparently decided to work as a team, seeing as how they were together and not trying to kill each other, although it seems they had already tried very hard.
"I've got him!", cried Sinistra, looking scary. She had apparently dueled with McGonagall like the werewolf had suggested, and had ended up with her her robes torn, her eye blackening, and her hair disheveled.
"No, that's just Lupin!", said the other villainess, looking equally scary. She was missing her hat and her hair was beyond disheveled, standing on end and looking slightly burnt. In fact, a few strands were still smoking! She also had a bloody lip and her glasses were cracked. "He's not who we want, throw him back!"
"Wait, Minerva!", theAstronomy Professorsaid excitedly, "Maybe he knows where Snapey-poo is!" She then proceeded to shake him like a rag doll and cackle quite evilly. Soon the two witches had agreed to keep him hostage until he gives them information.
"We have ways of making you talk!",snickered McGonagall, "You bet your bottom we do! You'd better tell us where he is now!" The insane women raise their claws to accentuate their point of them being dangerous and succeed in looking very frightening indeed!
The threatened man stood his ground and said bravely, "I will never tell you where Severus is! He's my friend and I'm not giving up his location so that you two vultures can have your wicked ways with him!"
"Very well, then!", the ladies said scarily, and began to draw their wands. Lupin, even in the face of death, still showed Gryffindor bravery, and would not give in to them in the slightest!
Snape, seeing what was going on, realized that he had to protect the man from the terrifying torturers! He jumped out from behind the ugly plant and yelled, "Leave him alone! It's me you want, let him go!" His plan worked and they dropped his companion to the floor, forgetting him and running towards their object of affection. "Run, Remus!", Snape shouted to him, "Save yourself!"
The heroic Potions Professor was sacrificing himself to save his friend, how brave! As the scary women darted towards him, Lupin came up behind them and, being much faster thanthe two,ran right past them to Snape and grabbed him by the collar.
"What are you doing?", Snape asked him, "Why didn't you run?"
"Well, Severus," said Lupin, "You didn't think I was just going to leave you here with those harpies, did you?" He then ran like the dickens, dragging Snape behind him.
They got to the end of the hallway and climbed the first set of stairs they saw. Up and up they went, not knowing where they were going and not caring, so long as they got away from Sinistra and McGonagall! Soon, however, they ran out of stairs. There was a ladder that presumably led to the top of the tower, and they climbed it quickly as well.
The men found themselves in a dimly lit room full of squishy chairs, and, not caring where they were, sat down to catch their breath and rest their legs, which had done quite a bit of running that morning. It was quiet except for the sound of their breathing until…
"Welcome, gentlemen! I knew you would be dropping in shortly.", a creepy voice announced from a dark corner. The pair jumped and spun around to find Professor Trelawney gazing at them in her usual eerie sort of way. She walked over to them and bade them to sit back down. "I know the reason you are running.", she told them, "And I can help you."
"What's wrong?", asked Snape, "Who's behind this? How do you know it?"
"My dear Severus, I see all.", the witch explained. "I can show you how to stop the madness, if you'd like."
"Of course!", he said, "What do I have to do?"
Trelawney led the pair over to a table with a crystal ball on it. "Gaze into the ball with me and we shall see what is in store for you.", she told them.
The Potions Master leaned forward and looked hard into the crystal orb, but all he saw was fog, and his own creepy reflection. Not knowing a thing about Divination, he turned to Trelawney and asked, "What does it say?"
She grabbed his hand and peered into the misty sphere. "Why, Severus, I see danger!", she exclaimed, "You're life is in great jeopardy! I see that you must not come into contact with… Wait a minute, the signs are changing!" She leaned in closer and then turned gravely to him.
"What is it?", the two men asked her. She just looked at poor Snape with shock and horror written on her face.
Suddenly, she scooted closer to him and shouted, "I see romance in your future, my dear!" And with that she jumped into his lap and put her arms around his neck, trying to kiss him! He jumped up and screamed, dropping her to the floor like a sack of potatoes. He and Lupin had to find a safer hiding place, and off they scurried, paying no attention to the cries of "Come back, come back! Don't you know that it's destiny?"
