DR- Well, I was too bored to do homework, and my editors/partners/idea givers were forcing me to write cause we got a review…..and with bribes too… so…yea…. Here's another chapter!
Bunnie - HI! I'm the one who bribes her! D
JJade- We've realized that there is a huge lack of lines for Shizuru and Yukina and let's hope we'll fix that…¬¬
Kain-;; Just do the disclaimer so I can start writing…
Bunnie- (ahem) Kurama's head is red, Yukina's head is blue, we don't own the Yu Yu Hakusho characters, so please don't sue
JJade- Not to mention we're not getting paid either
Chapter 7- In which Kimi tries cooking humor
Why Botan should not baby-sit somewhat humor
Animals are dangerous but the YYH characters don't seem to know that
Mission start plot development (yes there actually is a plot O.O)
Spirit World/Reikai/Beyond the River Styx (you get my drift)
Koenma- "BOTAN! WHY ARE THEY NOT HERE YET!"
Botan- "Well, you see, Kurama currently has his hands full with three ningen girls and well…"
Koenma- "THEN YOU GO BABY-SIT"
Botan- "Um…ok…" (sits on Koenma's hat)
Koenma- (eye twitch "NOT ME! I AM NOT A BABY! YOU WANT TO BE FIRED!"
Botan – (still on his head/hat) "Um…well actually…-"
Koenma- "GO GET THEM!"
Botan- "EEP! OK!" (rushes out on her oar)
Minamino Household – 5:15 am
Currently, the idiot of the household is the only one awake…and as an ultra intelligent idiot as she is, she decides to attempt to make breakfast. The keyword being ATTEMPT.
Kimi- (looks at alarm clock) "o0o0o I woke up so early! I'm so proud of myself!"
(Kain- Of course, the idiot just opens her mouth to prove that she is one)
She tiptoes down the stairs and into the kitchen, today, she was going to make pancakes, and…glasses of milk…or orange juice.
Kimi's POV-
Ok….so… I've seen Kurama do this… pancakes… Well, you see, I was thinking it would be easy, seeing that Kurama just put water in the pancake mix, mix and fry… at least I think he fried it…Anyway.. I was thinking it would be easy, but my obstacle was BIG. I CAN'T REACH THE CABINET!
So I climbed onto the counter you see, and took a box out and YOU KNOW WHAT IT SAID! It said Miracle-Gro that's what! Being an American I know what Miracle-Gro is, it's DIRT! And WHY IS DIRT NEAR THE SACRED HOLY FOOD! I may never know….
I put that box back, and take out another one; this one said "Ban Cakes." It sounded close enough to pancakes, and well there IS a picture there and it DID look like pancakes. See, I'm not THAT much of an idiot, I'm just… not-intelligent-as-Aki-or-Kurama-or….I give up…-
Anyway…I took the box and poured all the powdery stuff in a BIG bowl and poured the amount of water it said to put on the directions. (JJade- We have no idea how much…)
After that, I started mixing with a spirally thingy I found in the drawer. When it FINALLY started to look like melted ice cream, I left it on the floor, so I can get the pans. ONCE AGAIN, THE CABINET IS A BIG OBSTACLE.
This time, NOTHING fell on my head, and I DID NOT get stuck in them. So then, I kneeled down at the stove, cause I couldn't reach the stove either, so I'll just cook, standing on the counter . I put the pan on the fire thingy and turned a knob at the front but somehow the fire didn't go where it was suppose to, so I turn all of the on. FINALLY finding the right one, I shut off all the others. We wouldn't want Minamino-san's house to burn down now will we?
I jumped back down and took the big bowl; I put the bowl up at the counter first, then jumped up after it; I poured all the melted ice cream look alike into the pan and waited until it went all fluffy.
4 minutes later
Uh-oh… I have to pee…
Skipping pee-ing process cause its unhygienic just talking about it (we have a disinfectant fanatic here)
Still in Kimi's POV
Hmm… I'm cooking breakfast for everyone, so I must do a good job. I shall wash my hands so they are really really really clean. I have to wet my hands first, rinsing…and then, scrub and scrub and scrub. Then I add some soap, and scrub again, more and more. And then I rinse off the bubbles, and then add a little more soap, so the germs are all gone. Then I rinse off and fling the water everywhere, cause if I wipe it one something, then my hands will be germatized. Then I'm done.
It was then I realized that I spent 13 minutes washing my hands, so I run down the stairs, because the pancakes might start turning from fluffy to shriveled and burn into the color of Hiei's dress, I mean, cloak… but then I tripped and fell at the bottom step. AND MY HANDS GOT GERMATIZED. So I had to go back upstairs and repeat my whole Kimi's-ultimate-plan-of-getting-hands-non-germatized process.
When I actually got back downstairs, my pancakes looked like Kurama's pancakes back at the orphanage But, it was only 5:50, so it's alright . Well, I threw the thingy that looks like poopie now into the garbage can, filling it up all the way to the rim, well, you see, most of it is the food I never got to eat, I insisted that I save it and eat it but NOOOO the food had to mold and start looking funny.
Well, then I tried cooking again, but I realized that I didn't wash the bowl, so I was going to throw the melted ice cream look alike out, but the garbage can was already full. So I threw it all in the potty. And flushed…and flushing it got my hands dirty so I did my Kimi's-ultimate-plan-of-getting-hands-non-germatized process.
And well…guess I won't be cooking…so…I went back to bed…
6:27 am Normal POV- Aki/Hiei/Kyo's room
Aki, having a mental alarm clock in her head somewhere, woke up as soon as the clock struck at this very time.
Aki- "Oi… Neko!" (walks over and kicks Kyo)
Kyo, hearing her…alias… and getting kicked, woke up. "Yea?"
Aki- "School."
Kyo- "Fine…"
Having their "good morning" small talk finished, Aki went to claim the bathroom, bringing her uniform with her. Kyo, she went to grab her uniform, but she didn't make it there.
Hiei- (from windowsill) "You're a cat?"
Kyo- "…."
Hiei looked over at the girl and… she was asleep… standing up…
Hiei- "HEY!" (throws a random branch he grabbed from outside's tree)
Out of sleeping instinct, Kyo caught it, and threw it right back. (you can learn this just playing water balloons, its actually possible to catch and throw back within a 2 second time range)
Naturally you can expect Hiei to dodge it, unnaturally is that the branch will hit Botan square in the face as she peered into their window.
Botan- "GYAH!" (holds face in pain)
Hiei- "Oh, hi Botan, I suggest you get into the house before she wakes up."
Botan- (still holding face) "Ow…" (gets inside)
Kyo- "Is that your mom?"
Hiei- "Who? MINE'S!"
Botan- "I'M NOT THAT OLD!"
Aki- (in uniform) "Oi...Kyo, your turn before they get the bathroom." (notices Botan) "Is that your mom?"
Botan- "I'M NOT HIS MOM! WHAT MAKES YOU TIHNK I AM!"
Aki and Kyo- "You have blue hair."
Botan- "Huh?"
Both- "Yukina has blue hair."
Botan- (turns to Hiei and points finger at both) "You-y-you TOLD THEM!"
Aki- "che… I'm not in the mood to hear this pathetic argument, see you downstairs."
Kyo- "Well, have your little mom to son pep talk, I'm out." (exits)
(silence)
Hiei- "So why are you here?"
6:50 am- Kurama cooking breakfast
Kurama - "AHH! WHERE IS ALL THE PANCAKE MIX! KIMI, WHAT DID YOU DO!"
Kimi - "Why do you always ask me when something bad happens! "
Kurama - "It's a simple reason, because you're always the one causing trouble."
Kimi - "Well, not really. If you think on the bright side, I'm just trying to learn new things, but instead of learning something new, I fail."
Kurama - (sweatdrops) "So anyway, back to the topic, what did you do?"
Kimi - "Nothing much. I was trying to cook breakfast to prove that I'm not that much of an idiot and I guess I failed."
Kurama - "You could've at least told me to teach you -. Now we have no breakfast."
Kimi - "YOU ONLY KNOW HOW TO MAKE PANCAKES!"
Kurama - "Umm, not really, but considering that you ate everything, yea"
Kimi- (shocked and happy)"YAYAYAYAY! I'M NOT THE ONLY IDIOT IN THE HOUSE."
Kurama - "HEY! At least, I know better than you!"
Hiei - (enters the kitchen) "So where's the food?"
Kurama- (still angry) "Ask Kimi."
Kimi - (acting innocent) "HII HIEI! GOOD MORNING! HOW ARE THINGS GOING FOR YOU!" (but as you can see, failing miserably)
Hiei – (not interested) "Baka, where is the morning food?"
Kimi - "Umm, part of it is in the garbage, and the other part is in the pipes."
Kurama - "WHAT! How is it in the pipes!"
Kimi - "The trash can was full, and I had nowhere to throw out the burnt pancakes, so I flushed it down the potty."
Kurama - (screaming in a high pitched voice aka like a girl)"WHAT!"
Kimi - "I flushed it down the potty."
Hiei- "What's a potty?"
Kurama - "You know that is going to jam up the pipes?"
Kimi - "No, you're slow, if I knew that, then I obviously wouldn't have flushed it into the potty."
Kyo- (coming from upstairs' bathroom) "You do realize that the whole bathroom floor is wet right?
Kimi- "Oh, it's not wet. It's just your imagination."
Aki- (yelling from upstairs) "THE PIECE OF –beep- YOU CALL A TIOLET IS PUKING OUT LOADS OF VOMIT-LIKE –beep!"
Kimi- (yelling back) "Oh, it's not puking. It's just your hallucination"
Kurama – 'stay calm…stay calm….it would just mean clean up…stay calm…'
Botan- (comes out from no where) "Hiya!"
Kurama- 'YES! A SAVIOR!' (calm voice) "Botan, would you mind cleaning up the bathroom?"
7:15 am- Before going to school (Making it that classes start at about 7:40, don't ask why, just feel like it)
Kurama- "So… Botan will be baby-sitting you guys after school cause I have to go do something, alright?"
Kyo – "Then why do you have Hiei, Shizuru, and Yukina here then?"
Kurama- "They will be coming with me too."
Kimi- "ARE YOU GOING TO GO PLAY WITHOUT US!" (eyes get big and shiny ready to tear up)
Kurama- "NO! We're… going to go do our part-time jobs."
Botan- "HI! My name is Botan, I will be baby-sitting you guys for today."
Aki- "He already said that."
Botan- "…"
with that, Kurama and the brats walk to school in their separate ways, except that Kurama has to drag Kimi along cause she got lost last time-
School- Class 2D- Break-
No clue why, but the three avoids talking to each other in public, well at least Aki and Kyo does.
Kimi- (runs to Aki's desk) (whines) "Akiiiiiiiiiiiii! Did you notice that Botan has been outside the classroom in the tree watching us the whole time!"
Aki- "Yes, I have, and I also noticed she's been talking to herself in her compact mirror almost the whole time too." (she thinks the communicator is a compact mirror, which it does look like)
Kimi- "Can we play cards!"
Aki- "Maybe…go to Kyo's desk"
Kyo was currently sleeping, but well, she woke up when she heard Kimi screaming.
Kimi- "KYO! KYO! KYO! KYO! AKI SAID WE COULD PLAY CARDS!"
at this point, the class is wondering how the three are on a first name basis (note: they think Kyo is a boy) –In Japan, people are often called by their surnames, unless you are friends or close to the person-
Kyo- "Hm? You think Aki will actually play a game at a time like this? If you don't know Kimi, we're going to get caught real soon…"
Aki- (fans cards in front of Kyo, with all the cards facing her) "Take one."
Randomly picking a card, she looks at it and smirks. She turns the card so Kimi can see.
Aki- "Dammit…you and this card…."
Kyo- "They call it fate cause you can't change it you know."
Aki-"At this rate we're definitely going to be caught."
Kimi- "Huh! What's so bad about getting the joker!"
Kyo- "Well, it's holding a scythe, meaning there's possible death, since the grim reaper holds a scythe, or we'll be seeing the grim reaper ourselves meaning we might die, and seeing it's a joker, it means we're being tricked into something, or fooled, and look, the joker is sitting on a crescent moon"
Kimi- "BLEEH! This stinks."
random sensei walks in- (in Japan teachers goes to the classes instead of the other way around.)
…The random sensei happens to be Botan-
Kimi- "Hey! You're-"
Botan- "I'm your substitute cause Ms…your teacher has run into a baseball bat accident."
Kimi- "Oh ok… (goes back to seat, like everyone else)
Botan- "Well…since I don't know exactly what to do during an art class... So everyone just draw whatever you like."
Botan just sat there watching her targets that she must baby-sit because she was told to keep a very close eye on them. When all of the students handed in their drawings, Botan scanned the sheets the three handed in.
Kimi's drawing had a bunny looking sad, under it read the caption: "I know how you feel." Underneath the caption was another bunny, happier one, under it the caption said: "I just don't care P"
Aki's picture was of a picture of a girl with her hair up in a ponytail in a looking in a compact mirror. An arrow pointed the girl on the other side of the arrow, it read- "Botan" And apparently, "Botan" was saying to the mirror "I knocked the teacher out with a baseball bat." The reaper sweatdroped at this one, not knowing whether to worry, or get pissed off, seeing that the girl was a stick figure and has only a circle for the head, and a dot in the middle of it, with an arrow pointing to it, saying-"brain." Besides that, she also had no eyes, mouth, nose, nothing.
Kyo's piece of paper had a game of go on it. (go is a game played in Japan with white and black stones, the object of the game is to get the more territory than your opponent)
And well, besides those three, Botan threw the rest of the papers in the garbage, none of the students were there, seeing that it was lunch and the students all went somewhere.
Roof of school-
Shizuru is currently smoking her cigarette, looking down at the three girls who were at a tree. "Well, they're definitely not normal girls, I can tell you that."
Kurama- "Are they yokai?"
Shizuru- "Well, can't tell you that, it's weak, but there's definitely abnormal waves coming from them." (flings cigarette away)
Hiei- "I still don't know why they know about Yukina."
Shizuru- "Well, everyone else seems to know except for my brother." (we all know that she's smart enough to figure it out)
Hiei- "Hn"
Botan- "Well, I don't like them, LOOK AT THE PICTURE AKI DREW!"
Peering at it, Hiei merely said- "Hn"
Shizuru- "Do you have a limited vocabulary or something?"
Hiei- "HN!"
Shizuru looked at it, and chuckled, "Well, at least she admits you have a brain."
Botan- "What's that suppose to mean!"
Kurama- "Well what about the other two?"
Botan handed Kurama the other two pictures. He sweatdropped at the sight of Kimi's picture, but found Kyo's interesting.
The game of go was tied with 66 moku (or points) -6 is an unlucky number in Japan - and when doing joseki (term used in go nothing the shape in which the stones are put) they read "clown" in Cantonese. Kurama twitched at this, THE GIRL WAS MOCKING HIM, a clown is VERY similar to a joker, and THAT was pissing him off.
Shizuru- "Someone's pissed…"
Kurama- "THE GIRL IS MOCKING ME!"
Hiei- "How?"
Kurama- "THE GAME OF GO! IT HAS THE WORD CLOWN IN IT! IN OTHER WORDS, A JOKER! GRRRRR"
Botan- "Oh please, you're hallucinating, she probably just likes clowns or something, even thought they're scary…"
Kyo- "You called?"
Kurama- "What! How! When did you get here?"
Hiei- "She was here when you said, the girl is mocking me"
Aki- "You can sure hold a grudge..."
Kimi- "So why's everyone up here!"
Kurama- "Um…..having lunch?"
Kyo- "You do notice that it's already dismissal."
Aki- "che...you cut school, some best student in the school you are."
Kyo- "Well, see you at night."
Kimi- "I WILL BE COOKING DINNER!" D
Yusuke's house-
Yusuke- "So…we have a mission?"
(Kurama and company nods)
Yusuke- "And we have to find demons…"
(Kurama and company nods)
Yusuke- "And…we don't know where the hell to look cause they only appeared once."
Kurama- "Well you see-"
Yusuke- "WELL WHAT THE HELL DOES KOENMA EXPECT US TO DO!"
Kuwabara- "Well, I guess he wants us to find the demons!"
Shizuru- "Real smart baby bro…ingenious even" (note sarcasm)
Kuwabara- "I knew it!"
Hiei- "baka…"
Kurama- "Well, I guess the best thing to do is just keep on the lookout, but the last time they appeared, it was a crescent moon, so maybe their transformation is in monthly like half-breeds?"
Yusuke- "Ok…so we just stay on guard until the night the moon goes banana shaped, then we'll go kick some demon –beep-"
Kurama- "Sure, let's go home so Botan doesn't wind up tearing out her hair"
Meanwhile Minamino household
Currently, the girls are doing their homework, Aki is sitting in front of the coffee table, Kyo is laying on the couch on her stomach, and Kimi is on the floor in the same fashion.
Botan – "If any of you need help with homework, I'll be right upstairs."
Kimi – "OKAY! I NEED HELP BOTAN!"
Kyo – (mutters) "Okay whatever, I could care less."
Aki– "zzZzzZzzZz"
Botan – "Did anyone hear me besides Kimi?"
Kimi – "It doesn't matter about them! I NEED HELP!"
Botan – "Okay okay, calm down. I'm coming."
(Botan walks over to Kimi and sits on floor next to her."
Botan – "So what you need help with?"
Kimi- "Math….."
Botan- "Ok…what do you need help in?
Kimi- "Adding"
Botan- "Aren't you in Kurama's school? Shouldn't you be learning something…advanced?
Kimi- "Do I seem like an advanced person to you? D"
Botan- "Umm…so what do you need help in?"
Kimi– (mind - v I win!) "What's 1+1?"
Botan- (sweatdrops) "2. So does anyone else need help?"
Kyo – (muttering) "I hate math. I hate math….I hate math…math can go to hell for all I care… I hate chemistry…I hate chemistry…it can go up the damn teachers –beep- for all I care…." (muttering continues)
Botan – "What did you say?"
Kyo – "Nothing. Go see an ear doctor."
Botan – (pouts) "My ears are perfectly fine! Now go do your work! Aki, what are you doing?"
Aki– (wakes up from daze) "Huh? Oh…umm, thinking about the answer? What else would I be doing?"
Botan – "Err…-"
Kimi – "I NEED HELP BOTAN!"
Botan – "What now?"
Kimi – "How many sides does a circle have?"
Botan – "Umm, 1?"
Kimi- "But then one side is just a straight line!" 'See, I'm more advanced than what everyone thinks '
At this point, Botan slips to the kitchen to ask Koenma the question cause she doesn't know.
(Botan talking into communicator) - "Umm, how many sides does a circle have? The stupid ningen girl is asking me and I don't know the answer.."
Koenma– (evilly grins) "And you're the one who called me a baby! Hahahahahahahahaha! (ahem) A circle has no sides cause its round. -"
Aki- (staring at Botan talk into a compact mirror from doorway) – 'Hiei's mother must have gotten mentally disturbed from having a son like Hiei.' "Why are you talking to yourself?"
Botan – "Er…."'Quick Botan, think... uhh…' "What did you say?" 'Oh yea, great answer..."
Aki-"Whatever…" (opens fridge and takes out juice box)
Botan- "Are you allowed to have that?"
Aki- "Why wouldn't I?"
Botan – "Well, does it have your name on it?"
Aki – (flips juice box so bottom faces Botan) "Yea…" (the bottom had Kurama's name on it, but it was crossed out and now in bigger letters, it says Aki)
Botan- "Well I don't think-"
Kimi- "BOTAN! HELP!"
Botan rushes out into the living room to see a cat has gotten in, and currently, the cat was attacking Kimi.
Kimi- "AHHHHHHHHH MY FACE MY FACE MY FACE! OW OW OW OW!"
Botan- "EEP! STAY STILL!" (attempts to get cat off Kimi's face)
Well, now that the cat's off Kimi's face, its hanging on Botan's hair…
insert Botan shrieking-
At this glorious moment, Kurama decides to come home.
Kurama- "I told you she's going to be tearing her hair out…"
Shizuru – (indifferent) "Technically a cat is tearing her hair out, not her."
Kurama- "So…what do we do?"
Botan- "HELP!"
At this point, no one notices a gray ball of fluff at the doorway behind them…well… almost nobody….
Hiei- "KURAMA THERE IS A GRAY FLUFFY THING STICKING ITS' TONGUE AT ME!"
Kurama- "Huh, oh, that's just a puppy" (Picks up "puppy")
"Puppy" bite Kurama's nose-
Kurama- "GYAH!" (drops "puppy") (rubbing nose in pain) "No. its a wolf cub…ow…"
Shizuru- "How do you know?"
Kurama- "It bites like one…"
Hiei- "Hn…"
Botan- (shrieks) "AHH! GET THIS THING OFF ME!"
Silently, Kyo got off from the couch and picked the cat off from what's left of Botan's hair, about ¼ of the ponytail is on the floor now…but Kyo could care less, because its not her who has to clean it up.
Botan- (blinks) "How did you do that?"
Kyo – (lets go of cat) "Meh, I dunno…" (goes back to couch)
The cat jumped on Shizuru's head, but she didn't really care, as long as it doesn't attack her.
Kurama- "AHH!" (JJade – A lot of screaming in this chapter…)
The cub was biting Kurama's shoes, which we might add, is not very hygienic. Currently, he is trying to shake it off, but seeing how his shoe seems to be an extremely good rubber toy, the cub isn't gonna let go.
Kurama- "GET IT OFF GET IT OFF GET IT OFF!"
Kimi – "SHUT UP! YOU TALK TOO MUCH!"
Kurama – "Well, not really! I BET YOU TALK MORE THAN ME."
Kimigrinning – (holds up piece of paper saying 'WELL YOU DON'T SEE MY TALKING')
Aki came out of the kitchen at this point, done with her juicebox. She didn't notice much, just the fact that she didn't do any of her homework. At the sight of Aki, the cub immediately let go of Kurama's shoe, which you can't exactly call a shoe anymore and ran into Aki. "Hm?" She picked it up and looked at it, then Kurama's shoe.
The cub
Kurama's shoe…
The cub…
"Can I keep it?"
Kurama- "NO!"
Aki – (shrugs) "Off you go." (puts it down)
The wolf runs back to Kurama, biting his other shoe. "OK! JUST KEEP IT AWAY FROM ME!"
Hiei- (screeches) "WHAT IS THIS WHITE THING! GYAH!"
Yes, folks, Hiei just got attacked by an evil bunny… (Bunnie- "Yes my evil minions…hehehe…what are you looking at!)
Kimi- (face brightens at sight of bunny) "A BUNNY!"
She tackles Hiei down and grabs the bunny; she is currently standing on the poor fire yokai. "OH YOU ARE SOOOO CUUUTE LITTLE BUNNY! "
Tv- "A local shelter has just collapse due to heavy winds, leaving its sheltered animals, running into residents' homes…"
-End-
Coffeetabe/Review corner
§DarkSilverMaiden§ - Thank you for finding our story amusing, although not sure about the talented part, because this stuff just comes at random thank you for your review.
Bunnie – "WEEE! plays with Hiei-attacking bunny
Kain – "Calm down before you kill it."
Bunnie – "I hope more bunnies run loose and come play with me ."
Kain – "Please ignore her stupidity, she gets a lack of brain cells suffering from BBV Baka Brain-deficiency Virus. Well next chapter will probably come out faster than intended because someone won't stop forcing me to write.
Bunnie – "Well, I don't force you to write, I just simply bribe you."
JJade - "I could care less, and we noticed once again, Yukina has a major lack of lines, she is only mentioned in this chapter…
